I Want to Hold Your Hoof

by RunicTreetops


I Want to Hold Your Hoof

As yet another shopping bag is loaded into your poor, aching arms, you struggle to feign a smile for your lovely wife. For her part, Celestia is already gleefully trotting towards another store, this one seemingly full of scented candles. Once she turns around you can't help but let out a small groan, both of impatience and of sheer exhaustion from the small horde of bags, now about thirteen strong, filled with junk she has bought.

You would follow her inside, but you know full well that she doesn't exactly need your help. You instead opt to take a seat on a bench right outside to, at least for the time being, take a short rest. You take a look around, not putting any effort into hiding the disdain on your face. Manehattan has never really been your favorite place. Sure, you'd spent a fair amount of time in big cities like this back in your original world, but that's precisely why you love living in Ponyville so much. It's clean, it's quiet, it's friendly, and everypony knows each other. This concrete jungle, on the other hand, is dirty, loud, cold, and most creatures that pass by don't even glance in your direction. If they do, it's to gawk at the weird furless biped.

But, who are you to deny Tia a day trip that she specifically requested? Now that she has retired, she likes to do this sort of thing pretty often, sometimes with Luna, sometimes with you, and sometimes with both. Today, it's just you and her. Luna is apparently not the biggest fan of this sort of environment, but Tia has failed to notice that you aren't either. Still, you don't want to make her go on these trips by herself. What are you, a monster?

Judging by the way some of these Manehattan ponies look at you, you imagine you could probably pass as one.

Tilting your head back (this bench was obviously designed for ponies and is much too small for you), you see the sun high in the sky. You really haven't been here all that long, but it feels like it has been an eternity. When she was busy leading Equestria, you never would have taken Tia to be the shopping type. Though, you suppose she never really got the chance to try, either. You convince yourself that this is probably good for her before you hear the door to the candle shop open once more, revealing Tia with a big grin on her face and another bag for you to carry. You give her a weary smile as she happily saunters towards the bench and takes a seat next to you.

"Novo was right, they really do make candles that smell like everything!"

"Oh yeah? What did you get?"

She giggles as she happily levitates her bag from the ground to the small space between the two of you, revealing an impressive pile of candles inside.

"Well, this one smells like birthday cake!" Figures that she would pick that one out. She levitates it towards your face, giddy with excitement as she waits for your opinion. Her enthusiasm is infectious, and you take the candle from her and open the lid just a bit.

...Yup, that smells like a birthday cake. Not too dissimilar to the smell of Sugarcube Corner, actually.

"You know, if you want the house to smell like cake, I could just bake you one."

"Oh I know that. Your cakes are lovely, and they smell just as heavenly! This is mostly for the novelty of it. Here, try this one!" You watch as another candle is sent your way, this one much smaller and white in color. You can't help but notice the label, which has an image of Celestia's cutie mark on it. It reads, "Celestia's Snowpity." You give Tia a look of complete confusion, which causes her smile to widen. She gives you an encouraging nod and waits for you to take a sniff. Well, here goes nothing.

...Huh. You don't really know how to describe it. It's like... what you imagine Tia's essence to smell like.

"Tia, I'm going to be honest, I have no idea what this is and I find its very existence to be kind of creepy and questionable."

"Yeah I really don't know what it's about either. But it's pretty neat, right?"

"I guess??????"

"Here, try one more." Placing the strange white candle back into the bag, you take the final candle being offered to you. The candle is a disgusting shade of brownish-green, the label reading, "Murgle: The Scent of Contagion." You can only imagine the strange face you must be making as you turn to Tia, who is apparently trying to stifle her laughter.

"Tia, isn't this from that tabletop game that Spike plays sometimes?"

"Sunshine, I have no idea what you're talking about. Just smell it."

Well, here goes nothing.

...

About five minutes later you've finally finished cleaning yourself off after vomiting in a nearby trash can. After chugging some water to ease your burning throat, you finally return to your waiting wife, who looks a little bit guilty, but not guilty enough to have stopped laughing at you.

"Why would you buy that?"

"It will make a lovely gift for Luna, don't you think? After we switch some labels around, of course. Haha!"

She starts cracking up at the mental image of Luna going through what you just did, while you feel the color drain from your face as you imagine what she is going to do afterwards.

"Well, my little human, I do believe it is time for us to see some sights!"

"Oh? I thought you and Luna already did that on your day off before you retired."

"Yes, but we certainly didn't have time to see everything. You and I won't, either! Come, the day is short!"

"Could we at least teleport back home real quick to drop off these bags?"

Tia gives you a look of confusion, apparently having been completely oblivious to Mt. Shopping Bag slowly but surely lagging behind as she happily trotted down the side of the street.

"Oh, goodness! Sorry about that! Here, let me take those from you real quick." You watch as the bags are surrounded with the glow of Tia's magic. Her eyes briefly widen as she takes them from you. "W-wow, I put you under some weight, didn't I?" There is a quick flash as she disappears. Then, seconds later, she's in front of you again, bags now absent from her person. "There we go, the goods are safe at home. Let's get going, shall we?"

A brief vision flashes in your eyes as you look at her. This time, she didn't just start walking off, and is instead looking at you with concern.

"Sunshine? What is wrong? You have that look you get when you're too embarrassed to say something."

"I have a face like that?"

"Sure, it's the same type of face that the students at my school of magic used to make when they were guilty of something and didn't want to tell me."

"Are you saying I'm a child?"

"No, I'm saying you're guilty of something. You'll tell me what's on your mind, won't you?"

She gives you a look that at first seems like genuine worry but slowly devolves into a look of "you aren't getting away with not telling me." The downside to being married to an ex-princess is pretty much never having the upper hand in situations like this.

"Well, I'm not guilty, I'm just..."

"Yeeeeesssssss?" She seems amused by this.

"It's just something I was thinking about doing, but don't worry about it. I know it isn't exactly customary among ponies. I mean, why would it be when you're quadrupeds that don't have fingers? It wouldn't really make sense for that to be something you engage in."

"Alright darling, stop beating around the bush already. What is it?"

"...I want to hold your hoof."

"Excuse me?"

Her coy confidence melts away as she looks at you with genuine confusion, a slight blush appearing on her face. To the dozens of ponies that are constantly walking by, the blushing human next to the blushing ex-princess must certainly be quite the sight.

"It's... it's a human thing. Since we walk on two legs and, you know, have fingers and stuff, when two people are in an intimate relationship, they sometimes do this thing where they interlock their fingers and walk side-by-side while holding the other's hand. I just... think it's cute."

The blush on her face deepens, and you feel yours begin to do the same. You really don't know why you're so flustered. You've been married for several months now, and you've certainly done more intimate and/or embarrassing things than this. You just can't help it.

"W-well, I, uh... I don't exactly have fingers to interlock with yours."

"Uhh, hehe, yeah, I know. That's what I mean, it was a silly thought, don't worry abo-"

"But I don't mind lending you my hoof."

Her magenta eyes lock onto yours, her face now completely red from cheek to cheek. This is perhaps the most bashful you've ever seen her. She bends her head slightly and holds her hoof out to you. Back when she was a princess, hoofwear was a part of her formal regalia, but right now her snow-white hooves are bare. You return the bashful smile as you take her hoof in your hand. To be completely honest, it's pretty awkward. The height difference means that you're holding your arm almost straight down, and despite her being the largest pony you've ever seen, Tia still has to hold her hoof a bit higher than is probably comfortable. Plus, since hands and hooves are obviously quite different, it isn't so much a mutual hold as it is just you holding her. The bottom of her hoof is placed against your upwards-facing palm, with your fingers wrapping around the sides of her hoof. Said hoof is shockingly soft and pleasant to the touch. Not ideal, but the best you're going to get.

The two of you walk off in bashful silence, happy to just be in the company of one another. The two of you get a lot of looks as you go about the rest of your busy day in Manehattan, but you're just happy to be living in the moment with the one you love.

At least until you get dragged into another store.