//------------------------------// // Chapter LXXVII – Dawning Light // Story: Journey with a Batpony // by Gulheru //------------------------------// Twilight expected the rest of the night to go uneventfully. She hoped that to be the case, anyway, for she had had quite enough of excitement, and quite a few things to concern herself with. Starting with the Honored Lord Dusk Harvest and ending on the fact that the discussion she had shared with her companions made her actually far less worried about Rowan Berry and far more about Midnight. This irony definitely wasn’t lost on Twilight. Even the way in which the two ponies had left her chamber created a glaring difference, so much so that she wasn’t certain what to even think about it. She knew her beloved was battling certain thoughts and old wounds, and now she could understand his guilt over his wife’s fate a bit better, but… But the way that he had just stood up and left? Leaving her with the healer alone, all while knowing perfectly well that she was more than just a fellow member of the entourage? That meant that something either profound or truly terrible had come upon him. Twilight trusted that she understood his perturbation well enough, and that Midnight simply needed some time before he would finally best it and return. And yet, as much as she lacked the batpony sense of time, she knew when her worry lasted for too long and was becoming unbearable. So, having spent the majority of the day reading the books she had with her, or trying to anyway, as well as mentally preparing for having to leave the Mountain of Dusk soon, she finally decided that enough was enough. She had to check on how Midnight was doing, as the only ponies to knock on her door had been the local servants carrying her supper and giving her curious glances. Surely, more rumors circulated about the Iug. One courtier seeing Lord Dusk Harvest leaving her chamber in a huff was more than enough, she presumed. Though, as soon Twilight rapped on the door of the adjacent chamber, she knew something else wasn’t right. Notably because Rowan Berry was the pony to appear at the threshold, and almost immediately, as if she were concerned so much about Midnight’s whereabouts herself and was expecting it to be him coming back for the day. As it turned out a breath after, Twilight wasn’t wrong in assuming all of that. “Are you… looking for Maednoc Wentr, hwalba knaze?” the healer inquired, her voice a little unsure. Twilight nodded, both surprised by and immediately reading into the other mare’s cautious tone. “He hasn’t come back yet? At all?” “No. I genuinely thought that he could have first returned to see you, but, since you are here...” the operative replied, pointing out the obvious scenario. She then looked up and down the corridor, as if Midnight was going to just appear out of nowhere right that very moment. “I, too, haven’t seen him ever since we had that conversation.” Now that made Twilight feel the strong grip of fear clutching her heart. Considering what she had learnt and what had been crossing her mind ever since, could there have been a chance that Midnight had gotten himself into some sort of trouble…? The sheer thought was… was horrifying! Oh, why would she even let him venture away like that?! And yet Rowan Berry, surely the pony most suited to be the perpetrator of the terrible orders from her Lord, was right before Twilight, and did seem to be genuinely concerned about Midnight’s whereabouts. It definitely wouldn’t be the case otherwise, for the healer’s worry was genuine. “Rowan Berry, do you have any idea where he could have gone about the place?” Twilight asked firmly, but the other mare could only shrug, clearly as perplexed as she was. “Not really, no…” the operative admitted, biting her lower lip. “He looked rather emotional, but… I mean, I could wager…” Rowan Berry was going to continue, Twilight realized, though unfortunately right when she decided to make her own bet about Midnight’s location. “Do you think he could be at the herame? I know that he can seek solace in those so...” “... I could check!” “Would you accompany me?” Both the mares realized that they spoke at the same time, though even that funny coincidence didn’t really feel amusing at the moment. Still, Rowan Berry nodded, looking back into the room briefly. “I will, of course, accompany you, hwalba knaze. Though, as those things tend to happen, Maednoc Wentr is going to likely return the moment we leave. I cannot really leave him a note by the door, I don’t think.” “We’ve used only one set of corridors to reach these chambers, I don’t think we will miss him on our way out. And the shrine is not far, we can first check there and then return, just in case?” Twilight proposed, finding Rowan Berry agreeing without protest. Still, it had to be said, it was a little weird for Twilight to trot through the palace with an operative at her side. They didn’t really enjoy a casual talk on the way, too. At the same time, Twilight didn’t feel particularly… endangered by the closeness of Rowan Berry, even as they were taking passageways that didn’t have a crowd of courtiers shuffling about the place. Of course, nopony would be foolish enough to make a decisive move in a space like that, yet Twilight’s instinct wasn’t flaring even a little. It was due to the healer’s attention being so focused on Midnight. She couldn’t be anypony else at that moment but a worried mare, much to Twilight’s curiosity. Still, seeing the great colonnade of the Mountain of Dusk’s caused a shiver to rattle her spine, as Count Mistlock’s words were as alive in her mind as… as that dreadful smile from the Lesyi she had witnessed. “Is something the matter, hwalba knaze?” Rowan Berry asked, clearly witnessing the shudder. “Yes, but it’s just… you know, all the emotions of the day,” Twilight replied, trying to focus again, already peeling her eyes out for any signs of Midnight. “I think I do understand,” the healer admitted, also looking about. “We need to head in, I don’t think he would be praying out here…” Which was a logical thing to say, so Twilight only nodded, then trotted between the columns and into the hallowed space of the shrine. It was occupied by a few more ponies than the last time, spread about the main nave, but none of them were wearing the dark armor of the Nightguard. However, there was one brandishing the noble attire of an overseer. ‘Of all the ponies’, Twilight thought to herself, wishing to gently back away from the center nave. She cautiously motioned for Rowan Berry to do the same, but the healer was at least three steps ahead of her, even while being physically behind. However, Dusk Tarn must have just finished his supplications, as he swiftly got up onto his hooves, then turned in a hurry. His eyes met Twilight’s almost immediately. It wasn’t a surprise, for how often would there be a purple, royal sunpony in a smart dress among those present in the holy shrine? And at least, for all the coldness of his demeanor and his persistent anger at Midnight, the Overseer General seemed to be pleased witnessing her in the herame. “Neskaza Lunee… welae tueu noc illum,” the stallion greeted her, bowing before the Goddess’ name and then Twilight herself, and keeping his voice accordingly low in respect for the holy place. “I didn’t realize that you were paying your respects to Bogine in here, Honored Princess.” Twilight felt very, very reluctant to mention the real reason for her presence, but she also wasn’t keen on lying. Especially not in a place like this, for obvious reasons. “I welae Neskaza Lunee… illum tuu noc tez, Nadvidan Okolnu,” she responded in a whisper of her own, thankfully remembering the title in Noctraliyar. “I try to visit the shrines in the Mountains I am in. They are places of great significance and architectural beauty both.” “I understand your fascination, even if I don’t have much time to appreciate it myself. Even when I do visit, I need to focus on my prayers first, the place’s beauty… well, not even second, Bogine forgive me,” Dusk Tarn explained. Something about his tone seemed a little off, which prompted Twilight to ask. “Has something happened, Overseer General? I’m sorry if I am prying, but you seem to be on edge just now.” The stallion looked back at her as if to present the obvious reply regarding the ‘just now’. However, his polite if frigid response came as well. “While I am thankful that you have asked, hwalba knaze, this is nothing to be concerned about, and it would be unprofessional of me to complain about an abundance of duties and mounting stress,” he added, obviously trying to sound confident. “Sometimes we are called to simply endure it all and, while unpleasant, it is but a burden to take upon oneself.” Twilight wouldn’t want to push the topic further, considering all that she had learnt, but it seemed that the Overseer General was somewhat keen on doing that anyway. “I see that your entourage is not complete this time around.” “Uhm, why, yes,” she admitted, as she couldn’t simply deny a fact. “This is but a small excursion to the shrine for me, so I don’t think a bodyguard is much needed.” She realized, from Dusk Tarn’s furrowed brow, that it wasn’t the best explanation she could think of. “I would presume that his role would be to keep a constant watch over you, as that is what being a bodyguard means.” “Perhaps,” Twilight agreed, though only partially. “But I am not endangered in any way here, in this holy space, am I?” “Not in that sense, Honored Princess,” the stallion told her, his tone firmer, though not louder. “Yet taking one’s duties seriously is a requirement in our culture, even if one would think them unnecessary. If such a situation even exists.” Dusk Tarn paused to shrug, though in this gesture there was far more gravity than one would expect. “Shame the soleespalu colt never learnt that, despite everything.” “That’s not true.” For a moment, in the pause following that sentence, Twilight felt mounting confusion. Not at the statement itself, as it was quite proper, but at the fact that it wasn’t her who had spoken it. Instead, it was Rowan Berry’s voice which echoed ever so slightly among the closest columns. Not loud enough to spawn additional attention, but definitely to cause Dusk Tarn to give the healer a side glance, one piercing enough to cause anypony to shiver. “Is it not?” the stallion inquired, his voice becoming even colder. “And what would you know about that, lupule?” “I… I mean—” “How long have you been accompanying the hwalba knaze? A couple of weeks, since her arrival? You know Maednoc Wentr so well after such a short time?” Rowan Berry dared not to reply to any of those questions. Was it the venom in them or the high station of the stallion asking, it was hard for Twilight to tell. Yet the healer took a step back, lowering her head, while Dusk Tarn took her silence as his victory, turning his attention away from her. “For your sake, Honored Princess, I hope that he will follow his very basic orders with enough diligence after all,” he told Twilight, and the emotions bubbling inside of him risked getting out in the holy place. He was actively fighting that, it was discernible. “Bogine znate he cannot be trusted with anything more important, more… dear.” Twilight started her own battle at that moment, as she would have wanted nothing more than to press the issue, despite knowing that it would be a terrible idea. Dusk Tarn didn’t leave her with a choice, however, giving her a nod. “Have a pleasant morning and day, hwalba knaze.” Twilight knew that there was no point in stopping him, or trying to fight his stance. Once again, this wasn’t a place nor the time, and Twilight had had to learn that lesson well during her stay in Noctraliya. “You as well, Nadvidan Okolnu,” she only responded, returning a regal nod to the stallion as he trotted away, trying to keep himself together. Tears had invaded his eyes at the very mention of something, or rather, somepony most dear. Dusk Tarn’s wound was deep, deeper than Twilight could reliably understand, and even empathize with. She had never suffered a loss like that, and considering the importance of family in Noctraliya, both the one made of Houses and the natural one, she could only try to imagine how terrifying was the Overseer General’s affliction of heart. She almost hoped not to grasp the full, painful extent of it, and she felt almost relieved to see the stallion go. She could return to finding Midnight without his former father-in-law looming over the search. But, first things came first. “Thank you, Rowan Berry.” The healer looked up at her, more at ease now that Dusk Tarn had left, though that did not stop her confusion. “For what, hwalba knaze?” “For defending Midnight Wind,” Twilight explained, assuring her voice was low, and keeping a discreet eye for onlookers as well. There were enough rumors about the Mountain as it was. “I believe that the Overseer General is far too critical of him.” “I… thought so too. I mean, despite everything,” Rowan Berry told her, in a tone that could only mean a hint at her profession, “Maednoc Wentr is doing his best. There’s just a lot happening, and I understand why he would want time to himself. Even so, this prolonged absence is worrying.” Twilight looked at the other mare askance, then shook her head, realizing the obvious. “Of course, you must be more than aware of what happened and why Dusk Tarn carries so much… aversion to Midnight.” One would think that Rowan Berry would immediately comment Twilight shortening the name out of habit, but the operative instead inhaled and held the breath in for a good moment. Her eyes had those strange glints about them. “More than you realize,” the healer finally admitted, and something about that sentence was almost frighteningly honest. An operative’s job, as Twilight imagined. “You’ve researched him before you joined us, have you not?” “Let’s just say that I know, and leave it at that, hwalba knaze,” the healer replied, suddenly as terribly serious as she had been candid. “And it’s Midnight Wind.” Twilight almost slapped herself on the lips, but that would surely spawn attention, so she just nodded instead, then took one more glance about the place. “Well, Midnight Wind’s not here. Should we leave, or would you like to pray shortly?” Rowan Berry’s expression fell a bit more. “The Goddess shall understand if I don’t do that. I… need focus and time to properly formulate my prayers currently.” “I think I can grasp that,” Twilight admitted, turning around to leave the shrine. “I don’t believe so,” the healer instead told her, but there wasn’t any malice in her words. “I simply have been given… a certain inspiration. I feel that, before I again turn to our Mother, I need to rethink many things.” “I hope that it will help you, sincerely,” Twilight told her. Yes, she was unable to fathom the whole mystery of batpony faith, but as long as experiencing it lead to self-improvement? There was nothing wrong with that. However, standing in the shrine and Rowan Berry’s following silence were not going to help them locate Midnight. And since he wasn’t about, trying to consider things on his own in the holy space dedicated to the Goddess, then perhaps it would be prudent to turn from what was sacred to the mundane, and simply ask about. Thankfully, the healer took that upon herself without hesitation. After they had left the shrine and stopped where the Mountain’s main cavern was splitting, the mare asked a few passerby and even a pair of the local militia whether anypony hadn’t seen a Nightguardian trotting about. Twilight would bet that, considering the unit’s status, it would be hard to simply overlook a warrior in such characteristic gear heading someplace, especially in a place living and breathing gossip. Luck or the Goddess, maybe both, were on their side. “Apparently,” Rowan Berry reported back to Twilight as she finished a couple of conversations, “Midnight Wind has been seen heading down into the Dalli. One of the wampiri patrolling the passageways saw him taking one of the tunnels to the lower levels.” “I take it they haven’t asked him for a reason?” “I think they just assumed he had reason to, hwalba knaze,” the healer admitted. “We are guests about and Maednoc Wentr bid nocferratan. That would be more than enough to think that he can go wherever he pleases…” Rowan Berry tilted her head still. “Though, in my opinion, they should have asked.” “At least it would help us learn what is going on…” Twilight responded, earning a nod of agreement from the healer. “Where to, then?” “He took the deeper stairwells, eastern ones. We could follow and ask on the way.” That sounded like a decent initial plan, so the two of them were soon on their way. From what Twilight understood about the tunnels’ positioning, they were a pathway leading by the Mountain’s very edge, down the cliff and in the direction of the great waterfall, providing the Valleys with their fresh, crystalline sustenance. It was also easy to assume that the majority of the water in the Iug itself flowed from this direction, Twilight could imagine a complex pump system allowing that to happen. Such arrangement also had to be accessible somehow, likely from the passages they were taking, and the surprising number of ponies with various tools was a hint towards that. As Twilight and Rowan Berry were descending even lower, with the latter confirming with a worker that Midnight had passed through not as long ago, Twilight felt rather happy that she had mastered the spell on her eyes. Of course, casting it through her beloved was always a good opportunity at a moment to themselves, but she could now quite reliably achieve the desired effect on her own. It was definitely a good thing, as those tunnels had very few lanterns placed in them, and descending down the steps would have otherwise become problematic really fast. Rowan Berry’s question echoed slightly in the stairwell, even as she tried to ask it in but a whisper. “Are you… worried, hwalba knaze?” “I take that you are not asking about this descent, even with these steps being as steep as they are…” Twilight commented, spotting that even the healer was being particularly careful. “Yes. Yes, I am definitely worried, for many reasons. Not just the… one you are already aware of,” she told the other mare, trying to keep her voice low as well. “I think it is understandable, however, it is unlike Midnight to just wander off.” However, for all the explanation, it looked like Twilight hadn’t understood Rowan Berry’s question. “No, that is not what I meant. Not entirely, at least,” the operative told her back, her tone a little abashed. “Oh? What would you have in mind, then?” “Well…” There was a slight pause, one that definitely made Twilight concerned. “This place is quite… remote.” It was true. It was horrifically true, and such a statement coming from almost anypony could cause mounting panic, regardless of circumstances. These tunnels, despite being maintained and used, appeared almost abandoned at some points, and a perfect place for unsightly actions. And yet… there was something about Rowan Berry’s tone that almost completely nullified the underlining threat of such a sentence. “It is a remote place, yes,” Twilight replied, with confidence which she had managed to rapidly gather. “You are not…” the healer began, seemingly catching herself on a word straight away. “A… app… apprehensive? About going through one of such kunikuli with… me?” That ‘me’ also held an underlying threat. Twilight thought that she must have looked like the most carefree, naïve, trusting pony about, descending into the depths of a Mountain with an occultane right by her side. Yet she held her head high and allowed her voice to sound natural, without forcing herself to be courageous. “I must say that I would be concerned heading anywhere with an operative…” she whispered barely audibly, to avoid the echo. “But I am not worried, no. I am accompanied by a healer, and a pony who had shown that she can be most reasonable, if only given a choice.” “… is that what you really think of me?” Rowan Berry asked, mindful of volume, but showing surprise nonetheless. “That I am ‘reasonable’?” “I believe that you are, or at least can be,” Twilight responded, allowing herself a smile. “You have shown a considerable change ever since we have met. For once, you are not looking at me constantly like you want to do me harm…” Rowan Berry appeared like she was ashamed by that, or at least that she was caught showing it so overtly. “I suppose I can be blamed for that.” “You have loyalty in mind, that’s not a terrible thing, and you were faced with a… quite unlikely scenario with me and Midnight Wind. Don’t be too hard on yourself.” “I don’t think you can absolve me of everything, hwalba knaze, by finding an explanation for my actions and feelings,” Rowan Berry protested quietly. “I know why I feel how I feel, Bogine knows why I am trying to contain it. Don’t take fault away from me just because, that is not how that works.” Now those words gave Twilight a pause, at least internally. She still had stairs before her, after all, but further descent also meant having a moment to ponder on them. At least, before the sound of rushing water began to be more and more apparent. “Are we so far down, already? Is this the basin?” Twilight asked, with Rowan Berry shaking her head after a moment. “Nye, not yet, I think this tunnel does not reach that far down,” the healer deemed, actively listening to the sound. “There… might be an outcropping of some sort, that is definitely the alkeced.” “The waterfall,” Twilight mouthed to herself, joyous that she was able to guess the word through what she had already grasped about the language. The healer’s words proved to be true a couple of minutes after. The sound of the crashing water was becoming profound, and soon the staircase came to a stop, in a small room which sported a doorway to the outside. The view she encountered when they crossed the threshold was breathtaking, and not only due to the sky outside signaling the coming dawn. The majestic flow from above was descending at this height like a silver mist, as if fashioned out of countless little diamonds. The water was ready and willing to send reflections all over, be those due to the argent Sign of the Goddess and ancestors among the stars, or the golden and scorching Sun. These little gems didn’t care, occupied as they were with their life-carrying mission, heading to the Valleys below, not that they couldn’t find the time and eagerness to create a dazzling pattern on the inside of the rocky recess. Twilight wondered whether it was a naturally created cavity, or pushed further into the Mountain’s stone to allow for an easier passage across the cliff, wherever this crossing lead to. And whether somepony designing it took into consideration what a brilliantly charming place this was, allowing to witness the orchards and gardens below through the curtain of rushing water. She definitely wouldn’t be against spending some time to appreciate this panorama, a marvel of nature and care, pondering on things. As it turned out, Twilight wasn’t the only pony considering that option. A good distance away, likely at the very midway of this outcropping, Midnight was sitting. His mane was falling down freely, dampened by the wayward mist of water, and his eyes were closed. He wasn’t praying, at least he didn’t have his forelegs lifted to the sky, but he appeared contemplative nonetheless. Though, even from this distance Twilight could feel a certain tension which was gripping him. This wasn’t a moment of relaxation for her beloved, rather a silent but fierce, inner battle. Rowan Berry must have recognized that too, staying where she was as she spotted his presence. She gave Twilight a glance, waiting for her decision on how to proceed. It was both an easy choice to make and not. To be close to Midnight was important to her, but he hadn’t sought this place for company, that much was certain. Yet Twilight could not imagine just leaving him like that. Last time he had decided to vanish, he was in so much discomfort and inner turmoil, and it could have been happening again. She took an uncertain step forward, her eyes locked on her beloved. For some reason, every next trot was harder than the previous one, as if she was being physically pushed away from the direction she was taking. She couldn’t quite explain it, there was almost a protest from inside of her, as if interrupting Midnight would carry with itself some sort of a disaster just waiting to happen. Twilight looked back, realizing that Rowan Berry was not by her side, but the healers gaze and gentle gesture clearly stated that she was going to give them a little room, at least for now. Twilight definitely appreciated her tact, even if she wasn’t going to leave the mare standing on her own for long, even in such a wondrous place. Midnight didn’t seem to be paying any attention. His eyes were still closed, his body was tensed up, even his wings were twitching occasionally, though the bandaged one wasn’t allowed to show much of that. All of it and his mane falling down in a wet curtain around his neck betrayed a vicious struggle he was enduring. But one that definitely didn’t occupy his instinct. The moment when Twilight deliberated calling out to him, his eyes abruptly opened and his head snapped so quickly towards her that she almost jumped back in shock. He couldn’t have heard her with the sound of water from below, but that didn’t stop him from realizing somepony was approaching him. Midnight’s eyes were wet, but it had nothing to do with the watery vapor permeating the outcropping. No, his internal struggle was to blame for that. His lips mouthed her name, then he sighed, looking out towards the lush Valleys behind the waterfall’s curtain. Twilight didn’t waste a moment, approaching closer and sitting by him. She doubted she could truly enjoy the sight which seemed to keep him in its thrall, but she wanted to learn what was special about it, nonetheless. She spared one glance towards Rowan Berry, but the healer remained at a distance, out of a certain respect to the situation as well as Twilight herself. “This was one of our places…” Midnight’s voice somehow reached Twilight’s ears, despite the rushing water, and in a strange way seemed to play along the waterfall’s violent composition, though the turmoil inside of the stallion felt greater yet than the dazzling cascade of silver. “She loved it here,” he continued, in the same, sorrowful tone. “We would sit here every time we were in the Iug. She would weave plans, great designs, about making the Dalli a more wondrous place yet. She listened to the water. She let it speak to her, tell her how it wanted to help the earth and the trees, and us. Her lips were smiling, just like her soul.” Twilight found Midnight’s words as nothing else but solemn poetry. It revealed without hesitation who her beloved had in mind, and it appeared that the memory of his deceased wife had brought him to this place Twilight understood why, the view was singular and spectacular. “It’s lovely here,” she told him back. Midnight continued without acknowledging her words. Maybe she was too quiet or maybe he couldn’t care. “I decided to try and find my peace here, in this view, in this… familiarity, but… I don’t know if it helped. I don’t think it did. It just brought back memories, the ones that I cannot shake off. Ones that constrict my throat, and bind my tongue, and make my teeth grind against themselves…” Midnight revealed, forlornly looking forward. With his mane down, he looked like a hermit who had withdrawn from his old life to try and find himself once again in the primal majesty of nature, yet one that hadn’t yet reached that goal, considering his tone. “Why am I so weak?” The melody of his voice made Twilight ready to scoot closer to her beloved and embrace him, but she didn’t know whether that was the right thing to do. A reply was warranted, however, since she was finding it hard to go along with how downtrodden and embarrassed he looked. “I’ve told you, Midnight, crying is not a sign of weakness. It shows that you care and—” “You know nothing.” For a brief moment Twilight wasn’t sure whether it was the watery vapor around or Midnight’s words that made her feel so cold, but she couldn’t fool herself. That one word, that one expression carried with itself so much loathing, so much accusation and venom, it coursed through her being as if she had just been bitten by an unseen adder. Midnight was keen on healing her of that feeling, protecting her, even if inadvertently striking her in the first place. “But... how could you know, ab Bogine? It isn’t your fault, it is but mine. Mine, as all of it was.” Twilight didn’t understand what he meant, but the conviction and the pain in Midnight’s voice were both evident and crushing. His entire body seemed to bend under that weight, even if he didn’t move a muscle. She decided to speak up, even as the hurt from his previous sentence remained. “Midnight, I—” “Ia znat,” the stallion interrupted almost instantaneously, “you are trying your best to understand me, to grasp my thoughts, my pain, everything about me. Such a shame that I am unworthy of your attempts, of your kindness and your pure heart,” he claimed, a terrible smile coming over his muzzle. It was sad, sour, maddened. “But it is all so dreadfully simple, agonizingly obvious. It is just that I am a coward. A terrible coward. Damn my accolades, damn my pride, I’m just a coward. And you…” Twilight was expecting him to glance at her, but even that didn’t happen. ”You just cannot fathom some things. Sometimes I cannot fathom them, it’s like I cut them away from me, a part of me. I push it all away, but how can one compete with a force of a lawin.” Twilight wanted to ask, wanted to know so badly the point he was trying to make! Yet his words flew out of him, cascaded like the waterfall before their muzzles. “I’ve told you, all that time ago, that I am not worthy of you, that I will hurt you. You held me through that, convinced me that it could be otherwise, but think not that, in my moments of weakness, I am forgetting what I warned you about. No, it is especially when I am like this do I realize just how terrible my words were, and are,” Midnight continued, his gaze locked on the mountainous horizon past the falling current, where light of the day gathered more and more, soon threatening to enter the Valleys below, to the dread of the workers and the joy of their charge. “You love me, and that is why you know nothing. Perhaps… Perhaps there lies the irony. Perhaps that is why we ‘remove’ those that offend our nation so greatly. Because we love our kin, and would not want there to be anything vile and twisted among us. But that is no way of living if we are, ourselves, twisted.” Twilight shifted a little nearer still. She didn’t want to startle him by touch, but she needed to be by him. His closeness would surely help her understand, and would shield her from the cold gathering around her, the terrible, clammy feeling manifesting from her anxiety and the humidity caused by the waterfall. More importantly, however, she wanted, she needed to help Midnight let go of all those surging emotions. She wasn’t entirely sure what he meant, but it was clear from this outburst that things became complicated and terrifying for him in the confines of his head. His wide, almost manic eyes testified of the turmoil. “I hoped, I so hoped…” he uttered, shaking all over. “I hoped that I could somehow make it work. That I could contain it in, that I would… I would do something, I would say something, but I got nothing, got nowhere. And I’m strangling myself!” he bit his lower lip with his fangs, drawing a droplet of scarlet from them. His words sounded like a mournful wail. “I’ve felt like this before, Bogine, I don’t want that feeling again! That is why... why I am so afraid, but saying nothing puts me back in that abyss too.” Using the pause, Twilight decided to ask, hoping it wasn’t the wrong thing to do. “What scares you so much, Midnight?” “… you.” Twilight felt like laughing. However, it wasn’t sudden, malicious ridicule that tried to force that reaction from her. No, it was pure surprise and that feeling of confusion that wanted to manifest through an expression of sour joy. Yet if Midnight replied as he did he must have meant it, there must have been a deeper meaning to it all. It was just about finding it, reaching for it. Twilight hoped her beloved would help her understand that much, in the sea of his uneasiness. “Why… do you fear me, Midnight?” she asked, in the kindest tone she could muster. His voice remain unchanged, on the brink of madness. “I don’t want to be alone. Not again. Not because of who I am and the many mistakes I have made. Not again…” “And… why would you be alone ever again, my love?” The stallion opened his mouth to speak, as Twilight rejoiced that perhaps she just managed to reach him through his bout of turmoil, yet his head shifted suddenly, away from her. It immediately terrified her to think that things took a wrong turn instead, that Midnight hit a wall in his mind that made him reluctant to even face her, despite her best intentions. That might have been true, after all, but she soon realized that her beloved had another good reason to look in the opposite direction. Just like he had done when sensing her arrival, the stallion managed to somehow detect that another pony was approaching him, and Twilight, upon looking past Midnight, understood why his reaction was so sudden. She felt her mane standing on end. Of all the ponies that could have made a sudden appearance… it was Dusk Tarn who was approaching from the other side of the passageway. The Overseer General, upon witnessing Midnight, stopped immediately as if petrified, one of his forelegs lifted up over the stone. He would have surely dropped his ledger, were it not for the fact that he not only lacked any signs of office, but was also wearing a most simple gown, looking like just a passerby rather than one of the most crucial ponies in the Mountain and beyond. Dusk Tarn’s expression was, likewise, far removed from his esteemed position, twisting violently at the sight of Midnight. “Smiyeset tu?!” his shout cut through the roar of the rushing water, as the stallion continued approaching, each step looking like it could crack the very rock underneath and plunge everypony into the basin below. “Tu smiyeset wen hic?! Post kwo tu robite ipe?!” Midnight got up to his hooves in a split second, his wet mane shifting violently. The two batponies looked like they were about to have a fight there and then, after all those tense, emotional meetings during the last couple of nights. It would have most probably been the case, were it not for Dusk Tarn spotting Twilight from behind Midnight, which surprised him enough to once more stop him in his advance. His eyes widened, but cold fury still persisted in them, even alongside confusion. “Hwalba knaze? Why did he…?” The older stallion looked briefly at Midnight, then back to her. “Why are you here?” Twilight was going to reply, honestly, but her beloved was faster. “The Honored Princess came here to witness one of the most beautiful sights of the Iug u Waesper, one that not many ponies know about. I decided t—” “Prokleyitu tuu ver, I’ve had enough of you and your ‘decisions’!” Dusk Tarn interrupted, baring his fangs. “How dare you even come here, with the Honored Princess or not?!” Midnight, despite being as emotionally compromised as Twilight had witnessed, almost immediately tried to hide it all inside. It was a feat of self-control, no doubt, though she worried just how much strength it cost him. “This was a special place for us both, as you know. I’ve wanted to pay my respect to her memory at the same time.” Dusk Tarn hissed so viciously he almost snarled. “And I suppose you also look for her among the giwazdi every night, nye?! Don’t make me laugh!” “I loved her, vezpatr.” “Tacit!” “What’s happen—” Twilight turned to spot that Rowan Berry arrived as well, as she must have taken note of the Overseer General from the distance... or maybe heard his shouts, for even the waterfall couldn’t utterly muffle the exchange. The healer’s eyes widened as she saw the older stallion, though she cautiously came closer, if only to be a witness to the situation and not a participant. Not that Dusk Tarn cared at this point, his gaze only briefly acknowledging the mare’s presence. Though he gave her another, warning glance soon after, clearly remembering the exchange from just a short while ago, before focusing on Midnight once more. “Do not think that even the Honored Princess’ presence will stop me, or any other pony witnessing this, for that matter. I have tolerated seeing you around, again and again enduring your presence. But this…! Here?! This is an outrage!” Midnight took the protest without flinching, though Twilight could have sworn that his gaze became that little bit more manic, as he was facing head on the fury of his father-in-law. “You blame me, Nadvidan Okolnu, and I have no intention of escaping this blame,” the stallion spoke, trying to remain as calm as possible, though his upper lip was shuddering dangerously. “I’ve been escaping from too many things in my life, too many truths. If I can accept one of those, perhaps others will follow suit.” Twilight felt the surge of pride for her beloved saying so, but Dusk Tarn’s anger was pushing away all other emotions but indignation from the scene. “How noble, Maednoc Wentr!” the older stallion judged the declaration, almost spitting after saying the name. “You accept the blame so gallantly when in it indisputable!” Midnight’s head hung just a little, as if he had just used the last ounces of his strength to make his declaration. “I will not argue.” “The less I hear from you the better!” Dusk Tarn shouted again, taking another step in Midnight’s direction, not mindful of Twilight’s presence right nearby, and of her beloved’s stance lowering ever so slightly. Even with Midnight being soaked through due to the waterfall’s vapor in the air, and emotionally wrecked, his instinct was acting accordingly, and his training and position were giving his pose a dangerous edge. Twilight was keeping an eye on his reactions. She trusted in him being able to contain himself, but there were limits to everything, especially patience when dealing with a furious father of a deceased wife. Not to even mention that the very time for this ‘exchange’ was very quickly running out. Twilight could feel through her enchantment that remaining in this open passageway was going to become painful in but a few minutes. The bright aura of the morning was now firmly filling the horizon, turning the regal blue into blinding, white gold. Soon enough the Sun itself would show its glorious, but overwhelming presence over the mountain ranges, its rays giving life, but striking viciously at night-accustomed eyes. Midnight must have been aware of this too, but he was focused so much on the pony before him that he was willing to risk sunlight striking them both soon. “There is one thing that you will hear from me, Nadvidan Okolnu,” he declared, taking his own step forth. A move that caused both Twilight and Rowan Berry to follow, getting a bit closer to him. Their gazes met, and both of them looked ready to stop Midnight from doing something unreasonable. Dusk Tarn, likewise, planted his hooves more firmly onto the ground, as if ready for a pounce. He lacked the build of a warrior, but Twilight would not be surprised by him being ready to stand his ground nevertheless, driven by his hatred towards Midnight. Who, despite being cautious, anxious, overwhelmed and steady alike, decided to continue peaking, trying to stop his voice from shaking alongside his whole body. He sounded both more confident and more on the edge due to his mighty effort. “I never had the courage to say it, true. Another one of my faults, and there are many. But I cannot keep all of this inside me, as Bogine knows, I am a step away from losing my mind… Or maybe I have already lost it at this point?” “Spare me the—!” “Ia ecus.” Those two words served as an interruption, clear and loud, despite the roaring waterfall. The Overseer General didn’t react to them however, unmoved, regardless of the strength of that declaration. Midnight continued, unabated. “I am so sorry, Dusk Tarn, for what happened. I should have said it so long ago. I always thought that my pain was the justice I deserved, but…” He paused for a moment, to catch his shaky breath. “That was what I needed to feel, tac, but not what I needed to do. I begged for Dusk Stream’s forgiveness many times, now... I am ready to beg for yours.” Twilight felt that her eyes were wet, though it had nothing to do with the vapor in the air. Something about Midnight being ready to make such a step was deeply profound and touching. It was as if she could, among the turmoil and strife within him, see a wall in his mind crumble and topple. She could only hope that it was something that could give him the relief he was so desperately searching for. However, Dusk Tarn didn’t seem impressed, moved, or touched. The older stallion only stood where he was, giving Midnight the stare that harbored nothing but harmful intentions. And one which was beginning to strain under the gathering sunlight, though that wasn’t enough to have the Overseer General relent. “You are ready… to beg…” he spoke, measuring his words, dripping with venom. “How humble and proper of you. Perhaps if you had such humility and propriety in the first place, we wouldn’t be standing here! Or, better yet, we would be standing here in greater number!” Midnight didn’t flinch, though these words were like a physical strike. Twilight definitely felt them as such, and, much to her surprise, so did Rowan Berry. A glance the healer’s way showed that her muzzle twitched just a little. She had also taken a small step forward, her other foreleg lifted ever so slightly, not to trot on, but to raise up, as if to try get the conversation under control. Not that Dusk Tarn cared to do so, though his gaze briefly landed on the operative and then on Twilight herself. Nothing about it spelled shame, reluctance to continue or anything of the sort. This was a stare of a wounded father, a pony who lost his precious, treasured child, and few anguishes in life could match that pain. Midnight recognized that as well. “I cannot change what happened, even though you have no idea how much I would want that, D—” “Suddenly wise enough to see that?!” the Overseer General interrupted again. “No, Maednoc Wentr, things aren’t that easy, for the pain you caused…! The shame you brought, the loss you have inflicted on my bloodline, are all unforgivable! And why did it happen? On a whim?! What did my f-filiye, iaa ertaca filiye…!” The stallion almost choked, so much emotions entered his voice there and then. “Where was she lacking? What did she ever do to deserve this?!” Midnight didn’t reply. He just stood there, head low, his damp mane giving him an even more sorrowful look, as his father-in-law was chastising him with righteous might, not even caring that he was doing it in Equestrian, in front of a Princess as the witness. “So you stand here, now, and dare to beg forgiveness of me?! No, Maednoc Wentr, you will have no forgiveness, for there is none to be found here! Scream at the skies! Cry to the stars above, not to me, for my heart won’t offer you respite! Not for what your vice caused!” Dusk Tarn made his point perfectly clear. “And to think that iaa filiye, out of the goodness of her heart, still wanted to return to your soleespalu hide! But no wonder!” Twilight was almost ready to interfere, but Rowan Berry’s reaction again summoned her attention. The healer was now past Midnight, cautiously moving in the direction of the Overseer General, even if anypony’s instinct would be to get away from him and his exploding anger. Her expression was worried, yes, but… it wasn’t a worry aimed at Midnight. Even as Twilight’s beloved looked up, his gaze still sad but also… confused? It looked like something about Dusk Tarn’s tone perplexed him, despite the oozing anger from the Overseer General. “… ‘ no wonder’? What—?” “Because she knew what her duty was! Bogine, we’ve taught her too well how to be a proper mare and wife!” Dusk Tarn interrupted, baring his teeth in entirety, now that the light of day was also firmly aggravating his gaze. “It was you who had forgotten your commitment! And even then, even then, she was ready! She told us herself that what happened meant nothing, because now you two could finally be happy!” Twilight was no less confused than her beloved. Of the three of them, Rowan Berry was the pony to be perfectly aware of what was happening, apparently. She almost stepped right into the space between Dusk Tarn and Midnight, as if to act as some form of a peacekeeper. Her gaze firmly on the Overseer General. He wasn’t paying her any attention. “She was noble and dutiful and now you are here instead of...! Instead of her and...! It’s a joke, a cruel joke! And you dare to beg me for forgiveness?!” “Nadvidan Okolnu.” Twilight blinked. Was that an actual warning coming from the healer? It wasn’t loud enough if it were. “I said and I shall say it again, so maybe for once something gets to you,” Dusk Tarn continued unabated, like a waterfall roaring down a cliff, unstoppable once it began to flow, “scream at the stars, beg forgiveness among our dead! Or gaze right at Sewira Solee, for I am going to give you as much mercy as she does!” the Overseer General declared, trying to keep his eyes open. Just like everypony, Twilight included. She was on the verge of dispelling her enchantment, for the needles that had begun to manifest against her gaze were becoming unbearable. But she feared that even such a small gesture would cause something unpredictable to happen. Things were already taking a drastic turn, for Midnight was looking at Dusk Tarn with unbreakable intent, a question glinting in his reddening eyes. While Rowan Berry, trying to withstand the morning sky herself, had one of her foreleg lifted in the Overseer General’s direction. “Nadvidan Okolnu. Conmod, tu nye—” “Again, what do you know, lupule?!” Dusk Tarn shouted in her direction, pain from his assaulted eyesight fueling his anger yet further. “Were you here, have you seen my beautiful daughter crushed under the rocks?! Have you touched the tragedy of my bloodline?! Intrude not on the matter not regarding you!” Rowan Berry didn’t take to those words well, and yet it wasn’t frustration that made the healer grimace, as much as Twilight could tell while enduring the sky becoming brighter and brighter by the second. No, that was definitely pain manifesting on the other mare’s muzzle, there were hurt and mounting worry both, yet neither had anything to do with daylight. Even Midnight must have spotted that from Rowan Berry, considering the glance he gave the mare, before his eyes returned firmly to the Overseer General. Who wasn’t yet finished despite the agony of the day’s brightness, which was sending sharp, shimmering and slicing reflections through the falling water. “I tu! You, who would forsake everything out of your weak will, dare not to think I will grant you forgiveness!” Dusk Tarn firmly declared once more, his eyes filled with tears of grief and daylight alike. “Hope that, from Boginea Argentee, you receive any respite at all! From my poor daughter! And from...!” “Waesper Staw!” Rowan Berry shouted, as if giving the stallion a final warning. But she couldn’t stop him after all. “... my unborn grandfoal!” The waterfall continued to roar. Constant, violent, dutiful. Unfazed. Unlike everypony else. The Overseer General, realizing or perhaps not after all, what he had just said and done in his fury, hissed fiercely as if cursing Midnight in the foulest way possible, then turned around and trotted away. His each step sounded like weighing a ton. One could only guess whether his outrage gave him any reprieve from his pain. Nothing indicated that, at least not something that Twilight could spot, following Dusk Tarn with her pained gaze. She contemplated for a breath. She had been seeing but glimpses about Dusk Tarn so far, she realized. The stallion leaving her sight was a grieving, hurting, distressed pony, one who had never managed to leave behind him the terrible fate of his child, despite the brave, professional face he was putting on. It was a tragedy to see somepony so dutiful and responsible being stuck in such a state. But for the moment, Twilight understood it a bit better, though she had dreaded grasping it before. Dusk Tarn wasn’t only ‘himself’ in this situation. He was a father, yes, but also a member of a Noctraliyan noble bloodline, and the state of those was important to everypony among the Seven Mountains. For a vein to lose its chance of enduring, even entwined with another Family must have been a terrible burden upon him. Especially with what the Overseer General had screamed. It was that revelation which caused Twilight’s mind to immediately turn to its analytical side, trying to put things together, find a reason, come up with an explanation... and avoid sheer pain and panic. Even Midnight had never mentioned that fact, the realization of which made the entirety of Twilight’s body turn frigid cold, greater than any vapor could induce. The sweat from under her mane only added to the terrible feeling encompassing her. She even forgot about her aching eyes when she looked back at her beloved. His expression was betraying one, terrible thing. He hadn’t known. Her beloved, her precious stallion, he had never known any of it. That much was frighteningly clear from his eyes, his stance, his very being locked in place in utter shock. Only his lips were twitching from time to time, as if he was trying to speak but words were all gone from his mind, pushed away by the heartrending comprehension. Not far from him stood Rowan Berry. She was shaken as well, but rather than by shock, her state was caused by disappointment and frustration, for whatever reason, and yet... Yet there was pain in her gaze, too. She glanced at Midnight, then lowered her stare, her coral eyes reddened by daylight, but perfectly showing what was causing her yet greater discomfort. But Twilight wasn’t really interested in observing the healer when she was witnessing Midnight, her beloved Midnight, trying to process what had just happened. The Overseer General was nowhere to be seen at that point, but the other stallion just stood there, fighting back against the blow he had received, as if the pony who had dealt it could still answer him. “Nye…” Midnight’s lips finally moved, the tone of his voice feint but anguished beyond belief. “Nye, nye, to bid… Ab Bogine, to bid… Nye, to nye bid vereu...” He unwittingly took a step back, prompting Twilight to follow suit, for he backed towards the treacherous edge right over the waterfall’s drop. And when he looked at her, his gaze was absent. “No, this can’t be, I… Why didn’t…? What… What did he mean? ‘Grandfoal’?” That last word carried with itself so much hope, so much natural, pure wonder... One immediately crushed by the realization of what it all meant. Twilight felt that tears were welling up in her eyes, just like they started to do in her stallion’s. “Waesper Strumiene… Dusk Stream, she… She was… with foal? My foal…? Our foal…?” Twilight wasn’t sure what to do. Usually she would have words of support for him, of encouragement, she would make her presence known by a tender gesture. But that one time, she had no idea what was the right thing to do. How to address this terrifying divulgence which was already eating away at Midnight. His state had been terrible when she joined him, but now…? She wasn’t sure what to expect. Especially when Midnight took a swift turn, facing the burning sky, made the more unbearable by the reflections passing through the curtain of water. “... we were to have a foal. Waesper Strumiene, is that... Is that what you wanted to tell me?!” he yelled through the waterfall, a shout that carried with itself pain that couldn’t be muffled by anything, and was meant to reach even the distant stars, hidden behind daylight. “Bogine! Bogine, zmiluyae!” he added mournfully, falling to his hunches. Twilight cared not for anything at that point but helping her love out of his anguish, for his screams were drilling into her ears and making her heart bleed. She wanted to trot closer, but the moment she took the very first step, Midnight turned back. His eyes bloodshot, teary and wild. Sparks of insanity were dancing in their saffron hue, magnified by the red sclera irritated by the fiery sky. Yet nothing about this stare spelled being utterly lost in madness. Instead, focus turned Midnight’s gaze into a weapon, a pair of daggers ready to pierce, to draw blood to slake the gaining fury. Such a stare was hard to imagine, and harder yet to receive. Twilight found herself the more surprised, since Midnight’s eyes didn’t land on her. They went straight past her, not even to avoid damaging her, but not registering her presence at all. Instead, his stare locked onto Rowan Berry. The healer didn’t dare to meet it at first, but she must have recognized such a gaze landed, for she finally lifted her head. Twilight had to blink. If she didn’t know better, she would think that Rowan Berry’s stare was... unique. There was something tender, understanding about it, bearing a familiar pain. It was as if... For the briefest of moments, Rowan Berry looked at Midnight with the same gaze that Twilight tended to share with her beloved. There was a connection, far greater than a crush, or fascination, or anything else either genuine or connected with the healer’s other profession. No, that gaze, despite the daylight, despite the whole situation, was sad, was empathetic, was kind, was ashamed... It was loving. But... that was impossible. It must have been both Twilight’s imagination and the burning sunlight which was reddening everypony’s gazes. Things became even less ‘affectionate’ when Midnight finally spoke, with a voice both devoid of emotions and yet suffused with all but the darkest of them. “Tue znatee…” Rowan Berry nodded ever so slightly. “Tac. Ale iae nye moznee dict tu.” “Tue nye moznee… tsi tue nye welee?” Midnight asked, his muzzle twitching. “Maednoc Wentr, iae nye moznee.” Twilight listened in very carefully, especially since she found herself frightened by her beloved’s intensity. She had never seen anything like that from him. It was pain, fury, loss, it was all of those things combined into a truly ominous look. She was doing her best to understand where it was coming from, especially since her skills in Noctraliyar were decent enough to try and grasp what was being said, even if apparently lacking some context. Midnight bared his fangs out of a sudden, scaring Twilight into backing away, though his attention was only on Rowan Berry. For a moment it was almost certain that he would lash out at the healer, and not only verbally. It was the scarier that he didn’t. A deathly calm voice coming from him created a truly horrifying contrast. “Tue znatee… Tue znatee i tue nigd nye dictee ia.” The accusation in his voice was searing no less than the direct sunlight which began creeping through the Valleys beneath. Rowan Berry tried to withstand the stallion’s voice more so than even the illumination of the Judging Sun. Hoping to find some mercy in Midnight after all. “Conmod, Maednoc Wentr—” “Kaliy temps…” he interrupted her with cold hatred. “I tue nigd nye dictee ia…” Without a word or a glance more, the stallion turned around and began trotting away. Twilight rushed after him. “Midnight, wait, please!” she pleaded, seeing that not only was her beloved crushed, but his eyes were now redder than crimson. Remaining outside could have terrible consequences, not to mention— He looked back, his fangs bared, but it was hurt and not hatred that almost made him hiss at her. He managed to get himself under control enough to speak clearly despite the shaking voice. “No. I need to be alone for longer. Especially now.” “Midnight, please, I don’t want you to have to deal with this on your own, not with this. I know it’s terrible, but we could—” “No.” Twilight tried again, despite everything. She had to, he was her love and he was hurting. She couldn’t stomach leaving him alone with this new, devastating burden. “Please, Midnight. Come back with me, we will—” He turned towards her, slowly and methodically. Whether it was a beyond pony focus, or his anguish becoming so great that it made him look calm once again, it was hard to tell. “I will be back,” he said quietly, even trying to smile, though the effect was marred. “I promise, iau lumn, I won’t do anything stupid. But I have to be alone, please,” he entreated her gently, even through the torment, coming from his eyes, his heart, his very soul. “I will be back. For... For if I break any more promises in my life I will break as well. And I do promise to you that I shall be back tomorrow evening.” Twilight bit her lip. Everything about her was telling her that leaving him on his own in this state was an absolutely terrible idea, and that she had to force him to remain. Yet she just couldn’t bear the thought that her persistence, even in the face of such a situation, would only cause him more pain. So she had to relent, with a heavy heart. That little bit of hope still remained in it, like a silver droplet to keep her fear in check. “I trust you, Midnight,” she said, and she knew he heard her perfectly over the waterfall’s roar. “Please, come back to me tomorrow…” “I will.” Twilight believed him. Midnight then stumbled back, away from her. For a moment it looked like he was going to spread his wings and fly through the waterfall, but the tug on his bandage reminded him that he wasn’t fully healed. So, resigned even further, Midnight just trotted away, head hanging low and eyes shielded from sunlight with his foreleg. Sorrow was following his every step. Twilight could only hope that he wouldn’t stumble upon Dusk Tarn once again, as the Overseer General had left the same way Midnight was heading, but… one terrible coincidence had to be the limit for one morning. Speaking of which, Twilight dispelled her enchantment, feeling immediate relief. She much preferred stumbling through the dark passages of the Mountain to feeling like somepony was incessantly pouring needles straight into her eyes. Besides, she hoped that the discomfort wasn’t too great for Rowan Berry and she— A realization struck her like a blow to the back of her head. For a brief moment she was convinced that she had actually received one, so profound was the sensation. Twilight wasn’t proficient in Noctraliyar yet, not by any stretch of the imagination, but she was grasping simple expressions at this point, especially when focused. With her mind reluctantly switching its attention purely from Midnight, she ever so briefly thought about the dialogue between him and the healer, suddenly realizing that she understood what words were exchanged, and— Twilight’s mane stood on end. She turned to the healer. The other mare’s gaze was trailing behind Midnight, though she also made the effort to properly screen it from daylight. “Rowan Berry…” “Yes, hwalba knaze...” the operative replied, although it didn’t sound like she was paying any attention to Twilight and any request she might have had. That is until the question was asked. One forced by understanding the language. One prompted by why the mare decided to stand against Dusk Tarn, especially in the shrine. “What did Midnight mean by – ‘you have never told me’? ” The healer looked at her. Her eyes were red, yes, but not even the crimson could hide the fear. Luna didn’t think that her eyes could get any more bloodshot. She couldn’t see their reflection clearly, as the glass separating her from her loyal servant didn’t work well as a mirror, but she knew them to be in a terrible state. From tiredness, from anxiety, from… from trying to hold the emotions in without letting the tears flow freely down her muzzle. It must have been the next morning already, not that Luna was paying attention to any wayward clocks, her focus held almost solely by Moonwarden, motionless, almost still, in the chamber before her. Elegy had attempted to convince her to find some rest, but that Luna could dismiss easily. Doctor Silver Scalpel had tried the same thing, one time, but when met with opposition, had resigned without much of a fight. Even rest and sleep couldn’t tear Luna away from her servant at that moment. She felt that… that unshakable need to guard him, to protect him, even though she could do little to actually help him now. She almost felt guilty that she couldn’t have shielded him in the first place. Especially since… since… The very thought almost made her choke up, for she had already witnessed him on the verge of death twice. It was not due to the attack or the operation, no. She had watched, in dark, cold horror as the nurses and one of the doctor’s on duty had rushed into Moonwarden’s room even before Luna had had the chance of understanding that those contraptions around him had issued warnings regarding his worsening state. And she could only watch as the staff had tried their best, using whatever was necessary, including delivering violent lightning shocks to the unicorn’s torso only to have his heart finally restore its rhythm. They had been tearing Moonwarden forcibly from his end. Luna wasn’t sure if she could take it all, if she could actually withstand seeing him in such a state without endangering her sanity. Yet she also knew that she had to remain. Motionless, steady, focused, and yet moved, and trembling, and uneasy. At some point later, she heard somepony approaching her, even though everypony else about this side of the hospital were doing their best to be as careful as possible, without it directly affecting their responsibilities. For a moment Luna considered that it was Elegy, or Brass Plaque, or even Wobble Wink trying to again make her return to the Palace, but the sound of the hoofsteps was unique. Luna could guess who the pony was, as golden hoofshoes had a specific tone to them when finding their purchase against the floor. “I’m not going home, Tia...” she immediately declared. It was kind of Celestia to visit her in this plight, but even she couldn’t make Luna move from this, fated spot she was in. But it wasn’t Tia’s voice that replied. This one was youthful, more tender, yet no less graceful than that of her sister. “I understand, Aunt Luna, but don’t hold it against me if I try to make you reconsider, nonetheless.” Cadance appeared in the corner of Luna’s sight, sitting right next to her. It was at least polite to acknowledge her presence, especially since the Alicorn of Love was wearing a gentle smile of compassion and empathy. “Greetings, dear Cadance…” Luna spoke, finding it a challenge to utter every word, so great was her tiredness. The younger alicorn’s expression faltered a little when she glanced through the glass towards Moonwarden, witnessing his state and hopefully grasping firmer what Luna was feeling. “How is the Royal Advisor, Aunt?” That was a good question, and while Luna couldn’t give an answer backed by medical knowledge, she could testify of her servant’s silent, desperate tenacity. “He’s fighting... He’s fighting so hard,” she responded, finding only those words appropriate, and trying to hold back tears when saying them. “He’s holding on, though barely. I have... I saw, he was nearly... and twice…” She could hear affection and understanding aplenty in Cadance’s voice. “I know. I’ve asked, hoping the news would be better… but I’m glad they aren’t worse,” the younger alicorn told her, her voice even softer than the whispering volume would require. What followed was a moment of silence, but not an awkward one, no. Quite the opposite, it was a deliberate show of respect to the unicorn, and to Luna’s constant vigil. For which gesture Luna was very grateful, though she pondered whether her gratitude reached as far as to actually heed Cadance’s upcoming suggestion. It felt more prudent, instead, to explain certain motivations to remain. “I… I don’t want him to be alone,” Luna admitted, finding it remarkably easy to voice this pull coming right from her core. She knew well that Cadance’s talent facilitated a certain openness from other ponies around her. “I couldn’t have been there when he was attacked, I want to… I want to be here now. He doesn’t know it, but I am here, and that’s important to me.” “He might know it, dear Aunt,” the Alicorn of Love replied softly, clearly recognizing how hard it was for Luna to share that. “We all know when somepony important to us is close. But, you don’t need to tell me your reasons,” Cadance clarified, turning to face Luna properly, even when she was not receiving the same in return. “There is nothing wrong with how you are feeling either.” Luna didn’t think there was, but… it was difficult to voice the extent of what she was feeling. The younger mare continued, again looking into the room with Moonwarden’s motionless silhouette. “I am aware that Advisor Moonwarden is probably the closest pony you have, other than aunt Celestia.” Something in Luna’s core whispered to her – ‘closer’, but she didn’t feel like saying it aloud. Out of respect for Tia and their familial ties, she explained to herself. Not to mention that the connection with Moonwarden felt different than just a bond of blood or loyalty. Cadance, apparently, understood that completely, her eyes on Luna once more. “I honestly cannot imagine any other pony having the Lunar Majesty of Equestria safeguarding them so directly and so dutifully.” Luna found herself almost smiling, and it was… a welcome change, despite the seriousness of the situation. “Moonwarden himself would object to this,” she admitted, suddenly trying to grasp onto this conversation, to find anything to distract herself from her fear and uncertainty, even if for just a moment. “He would deem this a waste of my royal time.” “Would he now?” Cadance asked, as if doubtful. “Definitely,” Luna responded, trying to imagine the exact, grandiloquent words her servant would use. “He would say that Equestria needs my guidance and my abilities, that I have a… a royal obligation to everypony and should… should not bother myself with this. That he… that he w-would deal with… with this t-trivial matter presently and… and…” She had no idea when tears started rolling down her muzzle, and her sadness began choking her words in her throat, but she knew that even that Moonwarden would have found undesirable to some extent, unbecoming even. So Luna quickly tried to dry her eyes, Cadance’s words reaching her as she was doing so. “You don’t have to put on a brave front before me, dear Aunt… You know it is healthy to let those feelings out.” “I don’t need your advice. The one that should giving it to me lies before my very eyes, barely alive!” Luna realized only after a moment that she had just snapped at the other alicorn, but nothing about Cadance spelled insult or shock. If anything, Luna found only understanding in her gaze as she finally forced herself to meet it. “I’m so sorry…” she whispered, but received only a smile in return. “Nothing to apologize for. These feelings, even this anger, are all justified.” “Perhaps, but not justified enough to fling them at others, blindly,” Luna responded with conviction. “If anything, I know that I should leave my boiling blood for those that caused… this.” Cadance said nothing for a moment, in respect for the feeling, even if she was known for a more peaceful disposition. It wasn’t one keen on avoiding meting out justice, however. “Shining Armor is personally overseeing the investigation, dear Aunt. He will do his best to get to the bottom of it, I’m sure of that,” she said, again looking through the glass towards Moonwarden. “Despite the Advisor’s gambit all that time ago, know that you have our full support and aid.” Luna nodded, thankful that this was indeed the case. She just hoped that she could have a clear explanation about what had happened soon enough. The implications festering in her brain were becoming worse and worse, enough to be voiced. “Have you considered who…?” she tried to ask of Cadance, but didn’t have to finish the question. “Yes. Especially with our recent conversations, Aunt,” the Alicorn of Love replied with cold seriousness which was most unnatural for her. “I trust that you have done that as well…?” It wasn’t a taunting question, but Luna still felt personally struck by it. She kept her feelings contained that time, however. Her shock wasn’t caused due to her not considering the option and finding it insulting, no. Instead, the surge was but a realization, a comprehension that having to face the one scenario which involved… which would have one of her children being responsible for the attack would require a tremendous effort from her. One which would simply have to be undertaken, and not lightly. Most unfortunately, the one and possibly only pony who could help her in navigating that challenge was incapable of helping her at the moment, barely clinging to life, rendered silent, motionless and absent by the same perpetrator. Moonwarden was also the pony to tell what had transpired exactly before he had been found nearly mortally wounded in the middle of the street. If only he would wake up, even briefly, to impart his knowledge onto everypony… Yet the professional decision had been made and the medicine was being administered accordingly to give him the greatest chance of recovering for now, in his artificial sleep. Luna blinked. Perhaps that… Perhaps she could— “Aunt Luna…” She shook her head, looking at Cadance again having realized that she had lost her focus utterly and for who knew how long. “Yes, dear Cadance? I’m sorry, I’m a little—” “Please, don’t apologize, it’s really alright. However,” the younger alicorn spoke, her request sounding most polite, “we are all worried about you. We would all like for you to find your rest, even for just a little while, so that you can recuperate, clear your head. I know, it won’t become free of worry just like that, and that’s natural. But your health needs its repose.” Cadance, of course, wasn’t wrong. It was just that the circumstances all argued against the proposition. Luna found enough honesty in herself to let her know what lay in her core, what darkened all of her thoughts and robbed her of this necessary rest. “I… I don’t know if Moonwarden will make it. Nopony knows that, and…” she began, but without any chance of finishing her thought, finding it too unbearable. “You would want to be here, if Moonwarden were to die.” Luna was both grateful that the younger alicorn figured out what she wanted to say… and appalled that something like that would even be suggested in her presence. Her Advisor, her most loyal servant, he… he couldn’t just die. He couldn’t be gone, not now, and not like this. Luna... She had nearly killed him once, after all. Due to that assignment, the same in which he had threatened the very Cadance before her, to make the Royal Guard follow the smallest of clues he had left behind, in order to uncover a devious plot. The plan succeeded, yes, but Moonwarden paid for it in blood and the scars he was carrying on his back to this very day, as he had been left for dead, slashed, pierced and mutilated as a warning to anypony else. It had been the first time his obstinacy saved his life, but… just how many chances did a pony have to cheat death? If his fortune were to run out, Luna… Luna had to be there for him. So he wouldn’t be alone. So she… So she could see him off, if nothing else was destined for her faithful servant. It… Tartarus, it felt wrong to call him just that, though Luna didn’t know why. It always was the correct expression, but became severely lacking out of a sudden. She heard Cadance speak up once more and forced herself to listen. “I do understand, dear Aunt, fret not. But, you have said it yourself,” she tried to reason with Luna, “Moonwarden himself wouldn’t want you to allocate your time like that, even if he would surely appreciate it. Yet I believe that he would want you to conserve your strength, and I am certain he will want to see you in your whole splendor and beauty when he wakes up. ‘When’, not ‘if’, because I have a strong belief that he is doing his absolute best to return to you.” Luna smirked just a little. Cadance’s words were very kind, she could actually hear her smiling as she said them. While Luna found it demanding to agree with them just like that, they resonated with her in a way she hadn’t anticipated. Actually... they sounded far, far stranger than she initially thought, now that she took a moment to ponder on them. She glanced at the younger alicorn, who was still wearing that amicable expression and yet harboring a sharp glint in her eyes too. “I’m… I’m sorry, Cadance, I don’t believe I understood you right,” Luna admitted, then shook her head. “Verily, that is not what I mean – I mean, why… why have you said it all like that?” The Alicorn of Love didn’t respond, just continued to look at Luna as if expecting more from her. More answers, more… insight? Luna felt monumentally perplexed. What was this? She wasn’t sure what was Cadance’s angle, or if there was any at all. Was the tiredness so great that Luna was imagining things? It didn’t seem so, especially as the other alicorn spoke again. “It is most remarkable that you are feeling that pull so strongly, dear Aunt. I can tell that Advisor Moonwarden is very important to you, even more than you think. And you are to him, I want to assume.” Seeing that Luna didn’t yet grasp what she meant, Cadance continued. “I thought I have spotted it, that I have felt it during our meetings, but other matters were occupying my mind for me to figure it out. But your dedication to the Royal Advisor, the sheer power of that feeling that keeps you awake for yet another day, that is most remarkable, and most pleasing to see.” Nothing that Cadance was saying was helpful to Luna in her boundless confusion. She kept looking at her honorary niece with tired curiosity, though, somewhere inside, she felt a sudden realization dawning. She simply wasn’t a morning pony, some would claim. “I… I am aware that what I am doing is most unreasonable, but I wouldn’t forgive myself if—” “Of all the ‘most unreasonable’ things I have encountered playing my role in Equestria and beyond, I wouldn’t call yours overly outrageous, dear Aunt,” Cadance told her, laughing quietly. “I find it very sweet, in a manner suiting you. I’m just a little worried that you are finding it hard to guess the feeling you are experiencing. However, I don’t hold that against you, the situation is not really perfect to experience it, even if it brings forward what really matters.” That recognition inside of Luna was slowly growing, though its spread was making her feel... weird. For one, she felt that she was flushed a little, as if in embarrassment, but one that didn’t mind being shown. This warmth, that certain kind of it, one that she could recognize from before, from those moments of private conversation or silence alongside Moonwarden, it manifested again, somehow called forth by Cadance’s words. But why was that...? What was the Alicorn of Love trying to tell her so— Luna felt colors draining from her muzzle, even if it remained pleasantly reddened. It must have been a visible phenomenon to Cadance’s skillful eye and instinct, as she smiled a bit wider and nodded. “I wanted to visit you, dear Aunt, to let you know that I will gladly remain here in your stead, so that the Advisor is not alone and I can notify you of anything that might happen immediately. But also,” the alicorn added, with yet another happy sparkle to her gaze, “I thought it might be prudent to offer a little nudge, as I have discerned certain signs coming from you. Perhaps ones that you, yourself, couldn’t figure out.” Luna wanted to reply, she really did, but... instead, her eyes trailed back to Moonwarden, even if seeing him in his state was heartrending. But the reason for this deep and profound sadness, so different from simply a monarch’s concern, was suddenly coming to the forefront of her mind and, more importantly, heart. Was she... Was she in love? With her loyal servant? No, that didn’t sound right in her head... Was she in love with Moonwarden? It made sense, as much as things like love actually made sense in the first place. It suddenly put into the broader perspective all of those little peculiarities she had begun noticing about her actions, her feelings, her desires. Even what she was doing right now was given a vast perspective... She loved him. She actually loved him...? What... What a cruel joke that was. “Thank you, Cadance, I... I believe I needed that revelation,” Luna admitted, as the younger alicorn had followed the guidance of her talent and performed her task well. It was the circumstances that, unfortunately, made it all moor. “I need time to think, however. I... I know I can trust you to keep an eye on things. Please, inform me immediately if anything were to change with Moonwarden...” Cadance was ready to promise that, but something caught her attention instead. It was most likely Luna’s tone, as even she recognized that she tried to sound collected and calm a little too much. “I will, dear Aunt, but... don’t let that epiphany frighten you. Love is a grand thing, discovered in steps and—” “Thank you, Cadance.” That was the end of that conversation. The Alicorn of Love might have not known it, but nourishing that particular epiphany wasn’t doing Luna any good. After all, Moonwarden already had somepony in his heart, the locket demonstrated it more than clearly, alongside the unicorn’s evasive behavior about it. So why would it matter if Luna loved him? Was she to remain with that dissociated feeling devouring her from the inside for all eternity? The unicorn was loyal to her, he was kind, and most helpful in trying to pull her out of her melancholy, but... No, this couldn’t be. Simple as that. She wasn’t a pony to be loved. Respected, followed, even feared, but loved? Even Moonwarden, for all of his understanding of her nature, wasn’t the one to choose her. With that exhausted and exhausting thought, Luna relented to her own tiredness, deciding to return to the Palace. Though she doubted whether she would find any rest after all.