//------------------------------// // Cake or Death // Story: Fitting In // by PotatoJoe //------------------------------// Considering he had just aced the entire “knowing stuff” part of school, Spike felt pretty stupid at the moment. Standing in the door to the lunchroom with his lunchbox awkwardly clenched in his mouth, his eyes passed over the room slowly. The foals were assembled at small tables to eat, talking merrily and devouring messily. They all seemed so relaxed and happy. Spike, on the other hoof, had no idea what to do. He saw friends, such as the Cutie Mark Crusaders, sitting together. Others did not. There were spaces open, but some ponies, like Snips and Snails, had passed them in such a way that made it clear that they knew they would not be welcome there. Was there some sort of hierarchy? What were the rules - it wasn’t like a restaurant, where you sat where the waiter sat you, you had to know where to sit and where to not. And Spike had no clue. “ Nerd.” Spike jumped a little as a blushing, angry Diamond Tiara jostled past him, Silver Spoon close in tow. They trotted into the lunchroom and took an abandoned table - the other foals had avoided it and Spike could now tell it was reserved for them - before settling into a whispered discussion with several glances at Spike. That gave him one clue - he was NOT to sit at that table. That left thirty nine others that were still mysteries. He lifted his right front hoof. The room changed in an instant. It went from a colorful, pleasant lunchroom to this dark, tense arena where he would be judged and mocked and inevitably trip, spilling his food all over the floor - wait! That was it! Twilight had told him about the lunchroom and how much she’d hated it! She’d never understood any of the politics either and had usually just ate in the hall and hid in the library. There was only one problem with that plan - Spike wanted to try out this “recess” thing that came after lunch, so he wouldn’t be hiding on in the library. A few moments later he plopped down behind the dumpsters behind the school building, congratulating himself on finding a spot near the playground where he could eat in peace. Bidding farewell to Rainbow Dash, who needed a nap so she would have plenty of energy for her evening showboating, Twilight Sparkle decided a calming walk was in order. Already outside of Ponyville she decided to angle her path so that it took her to Sweet Apple Acres. She didn’t visit her friends there enough and an apple sounded delicious at the moment. Journeying though the woods as a pony was not a frightening experience, but if one was alone it was necessary to keep alert. A bad fall could lead to a broken leg, a cockatrice might be on the prowl, or some other danger that a single pony was vulnerable to. But as a dragon, it felt as safe was walking around her own bedroom. If she ran into hydra? Ha! She’d just set it on fire. Twisted ankle? She’d fly back to town! Lunatic with a chainsaw? Unless that was a +2 chainsaw, it wasn’t beating her damage reduction. It’d feel like a feather! On cue, a lost pinfeather from a bird drifted into her eye, poking her and causing her to cry in pain. Promising herself to leave fewer openings for her legendary bad luck to strike, she set back off towards the farm. As the wild forest parted and she the orderly trees of the orchards came into view, Twilight noticed she could hear the distant clops of hoofsteps and smell a stallion’s sweat. It had to be Big Macintosh and from the smell of things, he was working hard. As she carefully hopped over the wooden fence, only to have her tail smash it as she landed, she made note of the range and sensitivity of her dragon snout - she was able to pick up that Big Macintosh had eaten apples with cinnamon for breakfast, had a little cut on his right cheek, and had accidentally used Applebloom’s brush a few days earlier - the slight sent of mares hairspray was out of place on him. “ Hey! It’s Twilight Sparkle!” she called out with a controlled bellow, scaring a number of the areas birds. She sensed Big Macintosh come to a halt. “ And, you know, I’ve turned myself into a dragon, so don’t freak out, okay?” “ ...eesure.” came the distant reply. Twilight made her way towards the voice and found a cautious looking Big Macintosh waiting by several bushels of apples. He’d positioned himself by a pair of close together trees and seemed tensed to flee at a moments notice. “ Uh, hi.” said Twilight a little awkwardly. “ I was out for a walk - well, originally I was flying, but it’s a long story, anyways, I was out for a walk and thought I’d come by and see Applejack.” “ She’s in town today.” said Big Macintosh, his tone a little strained. “ Okay, I can tell you aren’t comfortable with me.” said Twilight, backing away. “ Perfectly understandable, I am a dragon, so yeah, I’ll just be going.” “...uh, miss Twilight, ah wasn’t meanin’ to be rude.” said Big Macintosh apologetically, causing her to stop. “ It jes’...uh, see, if it’s bigger’n me, it usually tried to eat somepony. So ah’m jes a bit nervous because o’ your size.” “ Okay, alright, I’ll stay low to the ground.” said Twilight, flattening to the ground the best as she could. “ It makes me look smaller, right?” Big Macintosh’s eyes went wide. And a moment later a struggled snort escaped his nose. “ Uh, miss Twilight, y’all look mighty silly right now.” he chuckled. Twilight glanced at herself - she’d taken the pose like that of a kitten trying to be stealthy. The cute gesture did not match well with her large and intimidating form. “ ...though, do admit ah ain’t feelin’ quite as nervous.” “ Okay, pony-dragon relationships need to be considered from a height issue.” Twilight said to herself, making a verbal note to help her remember later. “ Ponies see creatures shorter than them as a non-threat and taller as a predator. Expand on this observation and refine later.” “ Uh...what?” said Big Macintosh, looking confused. “ Actually, I can test that now!” Twilight exclaimed, realizing how simple it would be. She raised her neck and head up and crept forwards towards Big Macintosh, who immediately raised a hind hoof defensively and pinned his ears back. She bobbed her head down, looking at him from below - his ears perked back up and his hoof twitched down, his expression softening into a interested smile. Bob up. Fight or Flight Triggered. Bob down. Daww, Who’s a Lil’ Cutie Triggered. Bob up. Ears pin. Pupil dilatation. Adrenal production increases. Bob down. Playful smile and look of adoration, suggesting tendency to provide treats and belly rubs. Bob up. Big Macintosh scowls. “...ah fell y’all might be teasin’ me a bit, miss Twilight.” he said with a little huff. “...heh, sorry.” she replied, backing off and nervously scratching the back of her neck - she’d picked up that gesture from Spike and could tell why - it was strangely reassuring. “ Just testing a hypothesis.” “...if y’all don’t mind, miss big’n scary, ah’ve got some work to be doin’.” said Big Macintosh, turning to heft a bushel of apples. She bobbed her head up and he trotted away skittishly. Oh, she loved consistent data. “...well, he’s a geek.” said Scootaloo, looking at Spike as the unicorn foal lay groaning on the ground, a huge lump growing on his head OTHER than his horn. “ Time out!” called Applebloom, causing everypony on the hoofball field to trot away from their positions to check on Spike. They’d happily invited him to join in his first ever game of hoofball and not a minute had gone by before he’d gotten the ball. Tripped over it. And hit his head on a rock. Gotten up. Tripped over the ball again. And hit his head on the rock again. The real moment of failing glory was when he unsteadily had gotten to his hooves, taken a step, tripped over the rock and fell flank-backwards onto the ball, rolled off, and hit his head on the rock again. “ ...is he gonna die?” asked Sweetie Bell, looking down at Spike. He was muttering something, but it didn’t sound like words. “ Because if he is, we should tell Ms. Cherilee.” “ Come on, Spike, get up!” said Snips impatiently. He and Snails had been on the same team as Spike and playing against the Crusaders. “ Come on, if you die we have to use Pipsqueak again!” “ I’ll play if he dies!” called the dappled foal from the swings. “ Mmmrrrrooofffffeeeennn.” groaned Spike, his eyes little swirls. “ Well, just goes to show - you can either have brains or a career in professional sports.” said Scootaloo with a sigh. “ But I guess that was pretty obvious - I mean, look at his cutie mark! Who ever heard of an athlete with - WAIT WHAT?!” Applebloom and Sweetie Bell froze as Scootaloo’s cry rang out into the heavens. The pegasus threw Spike over and pointed at his flank where the chalk outline stars shone dustily against his dark coat. “ HOW DID YOU GET A CUTIE MARK?” she roared, shaking the concussed colts head. “ Come on, Spike! You’ve been a pony for like two days! Thats not fair! Thats totally not fair! We’ve been trying for years - no, wait, someone told you a trick, right? O-or you figured out a way to cheat!” “...ah don’t think nerds cheat.” said Applebloom, letting out a long sigh. “...ah guess he just figured it out.” “ Plees cal mre han anbulace.” said Spike, a little clarity starting to return to him as the violent shaking snapped him out of his stupor. “ Eh, thats awesome!” cheered Snails. “ Yeah - the Sugarcube Corner gives you a free cake when you get your cutie mark!” said Snails. “ We should go there after school!” “...please...call...me...an..ambulance...” Spike managed to wheeze. “ Oh, right, brain trauma.” said Scootaloo awkwardly, giving a nervous chuckle. “ I’ll go get Cherilee.” “...and...tell...them...” Spike wheezed, wincing with each word. “ I...want...a chocolate cake with coconut filling.”