Twilight pranced in place as she adjusted the controls of the interdimensional portal. She had found a series of parameters that guaranteed ‘an especially fascinating destination’. I recognized the song she hummed as the ‘Science! Science! Science!’ ditty she broke out only for the most joyous of occasions. My co-ruler’s preparations came to a halt when Nyx ran into the room.
“It’s not my fault!”
After a brief whispered conversation, the two teleported away.
With nothing else to do, Shining Armor, Penumbra, and I sat down to discuss our future foals. Cadance was just starting to show her pregnancy while Penny would be a couple of months yet. To spark debate, I tried to convince each to allow the other to name their future foals. Before I made any headway, my Leadmare appeared with a flash. She removed her foreleg from her passenger, the changeling researcher Crisp Berry. While he ambled up to the control panel, Trixie kissed me.
“The Flexible and Competent Trixie will be substituting for Twilight Sparkle on this adventure.”
Shining Armor asked, “What happened with my sister?”
“That is a hive matter that requires discretion. She may choose to share that with you if she sees fit.”
I heard a loud snort and turned to face Twilight’s head researcher. Crisp Berry lifted his ever-present lab goggles and stared at us with his yellow compound eyes. “Yeah, no. That’s not how science or anything else works. Mistakes are discussed so lessons can be learned and not repeated. In the eyes of Crystal Hive changelings, Nyx inherited her mother’s absolute authority, the dopes. So when Nyx gave a particularly colorful insult to a guard, he took the order literally. Nothing a week in a healing pod won’t fix.”
Rather than commenting on – or likely noticing – my wife’s death glare, the changeling snapped his goggles back over his eyes and went back to tuning the portal controls. With a flourish, he pushed the Big Red Button and the familiar silvery mirrorlike surface appeared in space. The changeling pulled a book from his saddlebag and sat down. “ISAAC says you’re good to go. Two hours is still the limit, though we can stretch it to three if necessary. If you do, that will be the last excursion for the day.”
Two Royal Guards fell in behind me. I had to pull a frowning Trixie into line next to me with Shining Armor and Penumbra at the front. “Eyes forward, dear. It’s …”
“… Showtime,” she finished, sparing only one more glare at the impertinent changeling.
On the surface, this dimension appeared pretty standard: Canterlot Castle and its city where they were meant to be, Ponyville in the distance with the Castle of Friendship visible, all four tribes of ponies represented in their Royal Guard. From this, we could assume most of the major events we knew had played out in this dimension. After the standard greetings, four soldiers led us through the castle. The stained-glass windows leading to the throne room showed recognizable scenes.
So far, the largest difference was the pair of insect-like antennae on the head of every pony. Also, the pegasi and thestrals sported butterfly wings rather than feathers. I very much hoped I would get a chance to snap a picture of the local Rainbow Dash. Posting that up around Ponyville would be a good payback for the last bout of pranks she pulled.
I was brought out of my musings as the throne room doors opened, and suddenly the antenna and the locals referring to Celestia and Luna as Queens rather than Princesses made sense.
No elevated dais was present. Both alicorns sat beside each other but not on thrones because neither alicorn would fit on one. The Royal Sister’s front halves were recognizable, though both sported the same butterfly wings and antenna of this dimension’s flyers. Their back halves however were vastly different. Large insect abdomens stretched out where their rear legs would usually be. They towered behind the two alicorns and a curtain kept me from seeing all of it. However, from the sounds of moving hooves and infant wails, it was clear that the similarities to insects were more than cosmetic. In this Equestria, ponies were truly part insect and alicorns served the role of ant queens, giving birth constantly. Did this dimension’s versions of Cadance and Twilight lay immobile in their castles, constantly giving birth as well?
I was suddenly glad I had not landed in this Equestria. While I loved my children and Chrysalis had provided a couple hundred, she did not lay eggs constantly. Having thousands or tens of thousands of offspring would have been a bit much.
The sun alicorn smiled. “Greetings travelers to the Equestrian hive. I, Queen Celestia, and my sister, Queen Luna, greet you.”
I stepped in front of my group and began my standard speech for these meetings, I had said it so often now I could probably recite it in my sleep.
“Greetings, I am Prince Mark Wells, one of the Triarchs from my Equestria. I am accompanied by my wife Princess Trixie Lulamoon, my wife and personal guard Penumbra, and Prince Shining Armor of the Crystal Principality. We have come to explore, form diplomatic ties, and trade with your realm. Also, to provide aid as needed to other versions of Equestria.”
Queen Luna narrowed her eyes and turned to Queen Celestia. “Sister, mayhap Prince Mark Wells can provideth his seed for Twilight. He doth fulfill varied demands that thy student set forth for a suited mate.”
“Hmm … Luna, I am not sure we can determine that just by his appearance and manner. Twilight’s requirements were quite specific.”
Luna sighed and shook her head. “Nay, sister. Queen Cadance’s requirements were most specific, spanning a mere two pages in length. Thy student’s requirements are beyond exacting, filling five score pages. We both did agree such a stallion could never be spawned by us.”
I zeroed in on a part of that discussion.
“Wait, are you saying you can tailor-make a pony to certain specifics?”
Both seemed surprised at my question.
Celestia said, “Of course! This is an ability of all Queen Alicorns. We can birth whatever the hive needs, be it drones, soldiers, male consorts, or princesses to expand the hive. Is it different for the ponies in your dimension? Were you not birthed to your Princely station to be a diplomat and breeding stock for your Queens?”
Penumbra cracked up at that statement, letting out a small chuckle. She had made a licking motion on her hoof and pantomimed adding another tally mark to a list. I wasn’t sure whether this was at my being ‘burned’ or relegated to Royal Stud Service. Again.
I had to remember to invite Prince Twilight from the opposite-gender universe on the next few trips. Was my being a male alicorn the source of getting propositioned so often or was it something else?
Trixie cleared her throat and stepped forward, drawing attention away from my still snickering guard.
“Ponies in our and many other dimensions are not crafted to our tasks. Instead, we learn our special talent as we near adulthood. Trixie would also advise against using my husband as a potential stud. His track record in producing unique offspring is well known and Faust knows what outcome this could have on your hive.”
The Royal Sisters looked equal parts discouraged and intrigued by this statement. Then Trixie did something that surprised even me. From under her cape, she produced a photo album and proceeded to play the gushing mother role to the two Queens, showing them one photo after another of our children. I had never seen her so maternal around other royals. On the other hoof, our press reported many aspects of our children’s lives to the public; she had few chances to brag about our heirs to those not already in the know.
While leaving Trixie to bond and improve social relations with Queen Celestia and Luna, the rest of us took the chance to consult with this dimension’s Raven Inkwell. While most events in history roughly matched ours, the details were different. Twilight was cultivated as a prospective queen and the element bearers were produced to be her entourage. Each was created to fill a particular need in the new hive. Rainbow Dash was a scout meant to locate a suitable hive location and nearby resources. Fluttershy identified and pacified fauna threats. Applejack handled all aspects of food gathering and production. Pinkie Pie did double duty. She trained and organized the rank-and-file troops and acted as the steward or principal administrator for the royal household. Rarity filled the position similar to Raven, as right hoof mare. They had lived together for all of their adult lives in Ponyville which was a training ground for Twilight’s future responsibilities.
We also learned that changelings were unknown in this realm. Both queens thought it highly unlikely that a race of emotivores could escape their detection for centuries. The origins of insect ponies were lost in the mists of time. The Royal Sisters conceded the two separate races may have merged into a single species. Could pony and changeling intermarriage back home lead to a similar outcome? I made a note to discuss this with both Twilight and Chrysalis when I got back.
In this dimension, Tirek was an anteater rather than a centaur. The Pony of Shadows took the form of a gigantic hunting spider, making me shudder at the thought.
As for the insect ponies themselves, they shared a hive mind that allowed rudimentary communication. Strong emotions could be sensed from ponies nearby and from the queens at a great distance. Equestria had only small outposts on the east and west coasts, not thriving metropolises. The smaller population made sense from the limited number of queens.
Trust Penumbra to notice and ask Raven Inkwell about the limited options on the food cart that brought in snacks. The ponies in this realm all possessed a Pinkie Pie-level love of sweets, to the exclusion of other foods. Even so, their desserts lacked variety. Penny asked if Raven wanted to be the first to try mango ice cream, the fruit being unknown here. If the emotion expressed by vibrating antennae matched the mare’s beaming smile, my bodyguard had made a friend for life.
The discussion between my wife and Queens wound down and the two looked at me again after their eyes left the photo album. Queen Celestia cleared her throat and spoke first as my wife rejoined our group.
“Upon reflection, we believe you would not be a good match for Princess Twilight, we feel it would be best if –”
Queen Luna cut off her sister. “If Twilight dost not view her offspring as experimental subjects by agent of the issue most perplexing thou doth produce.”
Penumbra coughed behind me to keep from laughing out loud. I couldn’t blame her in this case. I tried to steer this conversation in a different direction.
“Could our Twilight visit yours? She’s happily married and has two children. Perhaps she can convince your Twilight that her excessive requirements aren’t the path to a happy relationship.”
The ears of the two Queens perked at that.
Luna said, “Most Intriguing. Perchance thy Twilight wouldst be willing to lendeth this gentle sir to ours. Since he hath met the standards of one Twilight, mayhap another will likewise view his breeding acceptable.”
I could see that proposal going over like a lead balloon with my co-ruler. Also with King Thorax, but for different reasons. While not the most clued-in husband, he knew enough to not upset his wife.
Queen Celestia shook her head. “Sister, we cannot simply appropriate another’s mate. Prince Mark, we accept your offer to have your Twilight visit and talk to her counterpart in this dimension. The sooner the better, for this matter has been troubling my sister and me for some time. Twilight simply must be made to understand the vital importance of ascending to her destined role as a Queen.”
Luna hung her head at her sister’s words and spoke. “Do not bethink us cruel. In typical course, we would not be so stout in this matter. But potential Queens art not easily birthed and so few make shift to unlock their potential to becometh Queens. T’was my brief rebellion as Nightmare Moon that I did evolve from princess to queen. Thus, I could spawn soldiers and princesses legion. Mine own sister was compelled to do likewise. To mine everlasting shame, the greatest part of our most wonderous progeny was squandered. Through my exile, my sister was hard-pressed to replaceth these folk. So many did fail to achieveth their potential. Before Twilight, a mare most promising named Sunset Shimmer did vanish. T’was Twilight who discovered her in a forgotten realm. The princess refuseth to return to become a Queen. We fear she hath swayed Twilight’s reluctance even moreso.”
Celestia said, “We haven’t told my faithful student so as not to pressure her further, but soon my sister and I shall exhaust our supply of eggs. We will no longer be able to produce more ponies and have to retire. That would place the full strain of maintaining our race upon Cadance alone. I know from experience that this burden is more than any single Queen should have to bear.”
So this was more than a matter of getting Twilight to start dating. The potential future of this whole dimension’s population could be at risk. Glancing at Trixie, I saw the expected resolve and sympathy in her eyes. After all, this was not the first time I and my fellow Triarchs had this responsibility.
My wife said, “Trixie can’t promise anything, but we will try our best to help you. Our Twilight can call on yours along with our own dimension’s Princess Cadance.” Trixie arched an eyebrow at Shining Armor who nodded.
I said, “Our Princess of Friendship has a very competent team of researchers who will study your predicament. They may come up with novel solutions to your problem. In the meantime, I would like a copy of Twilight’s list of requirements. I may have an idea…”
After returning to our realm, I found Chrysalis at her desk next to my office. I waved her inside and got her up to speed on the new dimension and its unusual inhabitants. Chrysalis was intrigued by the concept of an Equestria ruled by bug ponies. She was less enthused by my prospective solution to their Twilight’s dating requirements.
She shuffled through the stack of paper held aloft in her magic. “Typical. Precisely what I would expect from any Twilight. Only an iteration of her could produce such an insane list of requirements for a mate. I wonder if ours made a similar list before falling for my spawn. I shall endeavor to extort…” Chrysalis looked up into my eyes before returning her attention to the list. “… convince Spike to confide with me if his sister made a similar catalog of demands – doubtless written in triplicate and with at least a dozen revisions.”
I decided to redirect her from that train of thought. “I can arrange for the few unattached Companion-class drones to visit their dimension, though the likelihood of a match is low. And I don’t want one to bond with that Twilight only for her to reject them because of her… ah… high standards.”
My wife snorted at my understatement.
I said, “Is there a changeling you know of in our hive that could bring all these qualities to a relationship?”
Chrysalis glared at me over the small book’s worth of checklists.
“So you want one of my Changelings to morph into the physical requirements laid out in this and try to seduce her?”
“Not seduce, romance.”
“With or without telling her what she was seeing was just a disguise? If not, then it is seduction, not romance. Trust me, husband. And you know Prince Shining Armor would agree.”
I frowned, unable to form a counterargument.
Chrysalis said, “Keep in mind that changelings can only bring the knowledge, skills, and attributes that they know into a disguise. My voice and appearance of Cadance were perfect; but my mannerisms and literally everything else were lacking. Given a decade, I could train perhaps sixty changelings to a level of competence across these three thousand, two hundred, and seven non-physical requirements. By then, I might have created a means to jam all that knowledge into a single changeling without killing it.”
I blinked. “So only around fifty requirements per changeling?”
“Indeed. Consider…” She pulled out a sheet and looked to the top. “… fiddle-playing. After becoming adept at the instrument, regular practice is required to maintain proficiency.” She glanced to the bottom of the sheet. “Or first aid unicorn spells. Advances in this field of study happen monthly, if not more often. Any Twilight Sparkle is most interested in the latest, cutting-edge research. Even if such existed, I would need a half-dozen drones of equal intellect to our co-ruler to stay current and competent across this many specialties.”
My wife’s green magic cut out, dropping the list to the floor. She scattered the pages as she walked through them. “No. The route you propose is unworkable.”
With that, she left my office and closed the door.
All right then. On to Plan B.
I waited in one of the informal meeting rooms in the Castle of Friendship. Soon, our world’s Twilight and Cadance trudged in, both wearing glum expressions.
“I take it the meeting did not go well,” I said.
Both shook their heads. Cadance was the first to speak. “If anything, I think we may have made the matter worse. At least we learned that this Twilight’s encounter with their dimension’s Sunset Shimmer wasn’t the root cause. Insect Twilight is masking several insecurities behind seeking perfection.”
Twilight said, “On the one hoof, she doesn’t feel ready for the responsibility. On the other, she loves her freedom to explore her world, grow, and learn by doing. Meeting Sunset Shimmer who willingly gave up the role of queen broodmother only made Twilight even more conflicted.”
Cadance nodded. “Twilight is strongly ambivalent. Her primary desire is to serve and protect her subjects. The straightforward and necessary path would be to do so as queen. The mare has been preparing for the role her entire life. Balance that against seeing how lonely Queen Celestia was in her duties and imagining herself experiencing that same fate. Also, Twilight could not have saved those same subjects from Tirek and other threats had she been immobile. She feels torn.”
I bit my lip in thought. “I assume telling her about Queen Celestia’s and Luna’s looming infertility is not a card we can play to get her to step up?”
Twilight shook her head, “No. I’m afraid it will likely have the opposite effect. All that pressure falling on her withers might cause her to crumble mentally. While she will still have her entourage of the other element bearers, Insect Twilight believes their friendship may change or devolve into a master/servant relationship. If she had someone else she could bond with, that would help.”
I sighed. “You confirmed there are no other prospective Queens?”
Twilight said, “That’s right. There have been many princesses, but since the time of Luna’s banishment, only Sunset Shimmer and Twilight Sparkle have reached what Celestia and Luna called ‘the Cusp of Ascension’.”
I said, “And their Cadance is permanently stationed in their Crystal Empire…. Hmm.” I tapped my chin. “From what you’ve told me, finding a suitable stallion is not the issue, just a convenient excuse. Suitable genetic material could come from any healthy male.”
Twilight nodded.
I remembered back to my first impressions of Sunset Shimmer and Sci Twi from many years ago. “What about their Sunset? Could she be convinced to return not as a queen but as Twilight’s anchor?”
The two mares looked at each other in silent communication. After several seconds, Cadance said, “Possibly. Although just like our Sunset, theirs is fiercely dedicated to her friends.” She smirked. “It’s too bad we didn’t find a spare Sunset across the myriad of dimensions my husband has visited with you.”
Twilight’s ears twitched at this statement, and she glanced at me.
I nodded. “Sounds like a viable Plan C.”
Twilight turned back to her sister-in-law. “That might be possible. Let me tell you about the Mirror Pond.”
Another trip to the dimension confirmed the existence of said pool. A long discussion between their Twilight and Sunset led to them both creating a single clone of themselves. Two coin flips determined which copy of each would stay in their Castle of Friendship. Because of the virtually identical nature of the first copy, no pony (or insect pony) would know whether the original or clone became the new broodmare queens. Our Twilight assured everyone that the genetic and mental degradation of any first copy was not measurable. Big Mac (for Twilight) and Flash Sentry (for Sunset) would provide the male seed that triggered the process. Our dimension supplied communication plates and daggerscale portals to mitigate the isolation of the new queens.
Today was the first day that our Twilight Sparkle took some long-delayed vacation. She would observe the transition of her counterpart and Sunset Shimmer into larva-producing Queens. I was certain several fascinating scientific papers were in her immediate future.
Over breakfast, Trixie questioned my hoof-on involvement and apparent fascination with the whole affair.
“Dowser, perhaps Trixie should have Twilight adjust the adaptation spell on the portal to this dimension. Then the Great and Powerful Trixie can become a True Queen. You will recall that in my wedding vows, Trixie promised you many foals. This way, Trixie will far exceed the number provided by her junior herdmate Chrysalis.”
I raised an eyebrow. "I'll be sure to visit you once per year to fulfill my husbandly duties." Without pausing, I took a sip of my tea.
Penumbra snorted and looked at her senior herdmate. "It's taken many years, but I think my Apprentice in Snark is nearly ready for Jedi robes."
“Nearly?” I questioned.
“Nearly,” chorused Penny and Trixie.
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