Yawning and arching her back, Trixie trudged into the kitchen of Princess Twilight's former castle in Ponyville, her eyes still heavy and itchy with sleep. She rubbed them a couple of times as the sweet aroma of haybacon met her nostrils, and she gave a small, contented sigh before she blearily blinked away some of the haze from her vision.
She was still dressed in her nightly garb: a soft pink sleeping cap with a light, bouncy ball that she swore must have gotten stuck in her mouth at times during the night. The taste of its fuzz was still fresh on her tongue, and she was pretty sure she was sucking it down hard when she finally awoke.
Her hooves were thankfully protected from the treacherous, icy crystal floor of the castle by fluffy white slippers. Starlight had gotten them as a present for Hearth's Warming last week, and she had yet to figure out how to get rid of them without Starlight noticing. Since the slippers had massive, cartoonish googly eyes on them, it made her look like she was some freakshow that escaped Twilight's lab in the third basement.
They were really comfy, though.
"Morning, Trix," she heard Starlight greet with a grunt. Her friend was busy at work, flipping something on the stove and whisking some eggs in a bowl. Haphazard splotches of batter were scattered across the countertop and the tiled exterior walls around it.
Starlight was wearing her ‘Kiss the time traveling mage or else’ apron that she had gotten from Trixie, also at Hearth's Warming. In the back of her mind, she wasn't sure if they both decided to get joking gifts for each other on purpose or it was some strange twist of reality that Discord had decided to play on them because he was bored.
As Starlight sloshed around the eggs in the bowl a couple of times before going back to whisking, Trixie moaned and replied tiredly, "Morning, Starlight." She arched a brow as she trudged toward the counter, near to the refrigerator in the left corner. "You're up early."
Starlight snorted. "Trixie, I think you might have it the other way around." She jabbed a hoof at the nearby clock hanging over the counter, and chuckled, "It's only nine-thirty. Are you finally done oversleeping?"
"The Exhausted and Weary Trixie never sleeps in! She merely decides when is the appropriate time for the day to start each morning." That earned a small giggle from Starlight, which in turn left Trixie to smirk herself. "Trixie has decided that in fact, society may begin at this wretched hour of nine-thirty today. She'll have to get an IOU for more sleep tomorrow."
"Good thing school's still out then," Starlight quipped as she poured the beaten eggs into a separate pan on the stove. Simultaneously spreading out the eggs and flipping the pancakes in the other pan, she added, "Because I don't think the students would appreciate you falling asleep as they tell you their deepest secrets."
"Bah!" Trixie retorted with a scoff. Waving a hoof dismissively, she snatched the container where they kept her morning supply of tea and declared, "They all have the same stories, anyway. Trixie... er, I admit that I might zone out occasionally." She grumbled under her breath, "Especially if it's Gallus whining about being poor. Again."
"Trixie..." Starlight sighed.
"It's true! At least, Trixie remembers, anyway. She admittedly tuned out after his first session where he explained in detail his parents' death, and why he has a secret—" She cut herself off and blinked. Scratching her forehead, she mumbled, "Perhaps that explains the weird griffon running around at night looking for criminals."
"Wait, what?" Starlight inquired, whipping her head around and shooting Trixie a confused look.
"Nothing!" Trixie replied with a wide smile. One that made the pressure in her head scream for freedom from such signs of emotion this early in the day. As she opened the tea carton, she stated, "Gallus also comes in for relational advice. I'm not sure why he thinks Trixie would be best for that."
"Something something, you helped Headmare Starlight and Sunburst, I think?" Starlight answered with a small snicker. While she waited for the eggs and the pancakes to finish cooking, she grabbed a cloth and wiped down some of the counter. Floating a cup of coffee over from the table, she sipped at it thoughtfully to hide the smug smile that was spreading across her muzzle.
"Okay, okay, so maybe Trixie has some experience with romance," Trixie groaned as she filled a mug with hot water before digging into the tea container with her magic. "Still, I don't know why he expects me of all ponies, the Unrequited and Single Trixie, to teach him the ins and outs of how to snog a hippogriff."
At that, Starlight choked and sputtered up some of her coffee. Gagging and wiping a couple of tears from her eyes, Starlight snapped, "Trixie!"
"What?!" Trixie whined as she continued to search through the container. It was feeling mighty sparse down there. "At least let Trixie have her caffeine infusion before she deigns to talk any further." She huffed and rolled her eyes, getting a similar response from Starlight.
Still with no teabag in sight, she finally poked her face into the carton and froze.
The entire container was empty, save a single lonely, potentially mildly expired bag of tea. She could even see a few bits of the leaves had slipped through the pores of the bag.
Sniffling, Trixie whimpered, "Why? Can Trixie not have her one joy in life?!" A soft giggle came from Starlight, and Trixie flattened her ears against her head. Since it was the only option, she took the teabag out of the container and sighed.
Glowering at it for a second, she snarled, "Celestia damn you to the depths of the sun, where Luna will then bury you in the deepest crater of the moon, and then Twilight send you to the pits of Tartarus!" She paused for a second. "And Cadance would do... something. Maybe make you look after Flurry Heart." She shuddered at the thought.
"I don't think it cares, Trixie," Starlight interjected as she sipped on her coffee again before resting her cup on the table—which had a spot appropriately marked with her hoofprint, a couple of stars like on her cloak, and about a dozen packets of sugar or creamer.
As Starlight began to place three equally sized pancakes onto three plates, Trixie huffed, "It's the theatrics, Starlight! Something only showponies understand!" Pressing a hoof dramatically to her chest and cooing a bit at the warm and fuzzy tufts from her slippers rubbing against her skin, she added, "This bag of tea has become Trixie's arch-nemesis! For it reminds her that she did not have the foresight to buy more tea!"
"Really?" Starlight flatly asked.
"Yes," Trixie replied with a nod.
Glaring at it for a moment longer, she bared her teeth at the offending packet. Then she shrugged and brightly chirped, "Oh well, time to taste this little slice of heaven!" At that, she quickly plopped the bag into her steaming mug and waited patiently for the tea to seep out and create the bitter, earthy drink that she loved to drown in sugar and cream.
Starlight simply shook her head and passed a plate over to Trixie. With an appreciative bob, Trixie grabbed it in her magic and set it down on the table before she hastily flopped down at her seat. As she drew her hindlegs across the floor to rest underneath the table, she swore that she heard her slippers squeak in a little, cutesy squeal.
Momentarily, Starlight stared out of the window above the sink, sighing as she watched a few flakes fall from the sky and glitter in the morning sunlight. Although Trixie couldn't see as much detail from where she sat, she made out the snowy pathway outside the castle that led to the School of Friendship, which was currently closed for the weeks between Hearth's Warming and New Year's.
A soft gust of wind kicked up some wispy snow and scattered it in front of the window, creating a kaleidoscope of color as the sunlight passed through the tiny ice crystals. Surrounding the window frame were a few strings of lights that they had gotten on sale after Hearth's Warming. Trixie wanted to test the limits of the magic power they could draw from Ponyville's new generator, plus the lights were pretty.
Who didn't like pretty lights?
Noticing that Starlight was still gazing outside, Trixie asked before she sipped on her tea, "Starlight?"
"Oh, sorry, I was just... thinking," Starlight replied with a small giggle-snort. "I suppose I have to fill Twilight's role on that now, huh?" At that, she sighed, and her shoulders slumped noticeably. Trotting over to her chair, she sat down and began to pensively munch on her pancake.
As the first bit of tea hit Trixie's tongue, she gagged and spluttered before spitting the vile substance back into the cup. With a betrayed glower, she grabbed the teabag from where she placed it on her plate and stared in disbelief at the small writing on the bag's string tag: decaffeinated.
"Who the buck got decaffeinated tea for Trixie?!" she demanded, whipping her head up to glare at Starlight.
Defensively holding up her hooves, Starlight retorted, "Wasn't me, Trix. Pretty sure that it's been there since I was first here. Probably Twilight got it."
"Sparkle..." Trixie hissed, shooting her gaze back to the cup of defiled tea. How could anypony possibly not want the sweet nectar of the princesses to be in their tea? It was the perfect balance between no caffeine, and caffeine overload like in that disgusting swill called coffee.
"It wasn't on purpose, Trix."
"She probably predicted with those science instruments of hers that Trixie would come back to her life," Trixie answered with a snort. Wrinkling her nose in disgust, she huffed, "She's trying to poison her arch-nemesis with this cardboardy venom!"
Starlight facehoofed. Hard.
Groaning and dragging her hoof down her face, Starlight finally mumbled, "Trixie, you know that Twilight—at worst— is just annoyed by you, right? There isn't a murderous bone in her body."
"There's always a first!" Trixie retorted as she floated the mug over to the sink. With a slight whine, she begrudgingly poured the tea down the drain, and a single tear rolled down her muzzle as she heard it lap up the drink without a second thought. So much for receiving her caffeine infusion like she wanted.
"Also, since she's the sole Princess of Equestria now, she could… you know, probably just come up with a crime and have you banished for it instead," Starlight theorized as she bit into her scrambled eggs and chewed slowly. Tapping her chin thoughtfully, she shrugged and went back to digging entirely into her food. "Doesn't seem like a bad idea some days."
"Well," Trixie mumbled morosely, "this still tasted like cardboard."
"So, it tasted like tea?" Starlight inquired as she sipped on her coffee. The loud slurp caused Trixie's eye to twitch irately.
"There's a difference, Starlight. Unlike that disgusting dirt water that you and Sunburst drink every morning, tea has the most wonderful, powerful, delicious flavors in the whole world!" Dramatically thrusting a hoof into the air, she quickly summoned a few magical fireworks to explode in the pattern of a teacup. Starlight simply stared at her.
How could her friend be so blind as to fall for the wiles of coffee, when there was so much more enjoyment in tea? She could hardly taste the sugar and cream in coffee compared to tea, no matter how much of each she put into her cup.
Sitting back down when she saw Starlight's bemused expression, she drawled, "Decaffeination is like—" She rolled one of her forehooves in its fetlock as she searched for the proper analogy. As she struggled, Starlight merely raised an eyebrow mockingly, a thin smile on her lips. "It's like Trixie without her cape, or Sunburst after he washes his mane! So close, yet so not like the real thing!"
Blushing a bit at the mention of Sunburst, Starlight glanced to the side and mumbled, "But he smells so sexy when he gets out of a four-day study session."
"That's exactly Trixie's point!" Trixie declared as she jabbed a hoof in Starlight's direction. Scarfing down her eggs, she moved onto her pancake and then noticed Sunburst's plate sitting at his place, which was tantalizingly empty of a certain stallion.
She glanced over at Starlight, who was in the middle of finishing her coffee and reading a quick article in the newspaper. Now was the perfect opportunity to strike at the delectable, additional morsels to feed her working appetite. As she reached out, stealthily, inaudibly, to take the pancake off of Sunburst's plate, she asked, "Trixie takes it that you have finished the school's preparations for next semester?"
"Almost," Starlight replied as she lit her horn from behind the newspaper. A bright cyan splotch appeared on Trixie's hoof and then burst, feeling like somepony pinched a nerve in her fetlock. Trixie yelped. Pulling back her hoof, she heard Starlight huff, "Now leave Sunburst's food alone. You know I'm not that easily distracted."
"Unless it's because of Sunburst," Trixie mumbled under her breath. Glowering down at her plate, she scraped up the last crumbs from her pancake and mournfully licked them off her fork. It always seemed like Starlight never made as much food as Sunburst. Not everypony felt obsessive about watching their weight!
"Sunburst still has to finish some of his final studies for Crystal University, Trixie," Starlight huffed as she flipped a page of the newspaper. If it weren't for that, she would have potentially died from the death glower that Trixie was leveling her way. Although, if the newspaper was held up long enough, Trixie's mind lasers might bore through it, and then she'd regret getting on Trixie's nerves.
"Yes, yes, and he's busy with being vice-headmare of the school," Trixie finished with a roll of her eyes. Eyeing the pancake again, she felt her stomach rumble, and she smirked. Glancing to either side, she started to inch forward again, and she quipped, "But why is he called a headmare, Starlight? Trixie's pretty sure he's a stallion. Unless he's a better magician than she!"
"Keep digging your grave, Trixie," Starlight snarked back, using her magic, again, to swipe at Trixie's outstretched hoof. "Besides, it's just a traditional title. One of the greatest headmares of Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns was a stallion." After a short beat, Starlight hissed, "Or maybe just a really, really, homely mare."
"You could always change it, especially since, well, you dislike tradition so much." Trixie shrugged and continued to stare at the taunting piece of food that could have alleviated her continued starvation. Undoubtedly, if she didn't get more sustenance soon, she'd fade away into nothing!
"What's that supposed to mean?" Starlight inquired, swiping away Trixie's hoof one more time as she looked over her newspaper.
Groaning in defeat, Trixie rested her head on the table and stared up at Starlight. Applying a small amplification spell, she made her stomach's gurgles sound louder, and she smiled weakly. Hopefully the guilt of seeing her friend suffering from malnourishment and lack of caffeine would move Starlight's cold, stony heart.
When it didn't, she huffed and she added, "Well, it's because you always seemed to be in such conflict with Firelight." Almost inaudibly, she quipped, "Something Trixie definitely doesn't have experience with." At the piercing stare she received from Starlight, she giggled anxiously.
"I'm trying to be a bit more understanding of Dad," Starlight snorted as she got up and grabbed her plate as well as Trixie's. As she deposited them into the sink, she snarked, "Although, it would be nice if he didn't send me a new shawl every other week. I haven't worn that since I was like, five."
Trixie snickered at that. When she was offered some coffee from the pot that Starlight had brewed, she momentarily considered it, but shook her head. She was awake now, anyway, and there was no way she'd ever be caught dead drinking that black garbage.
"Tea, Trixie's beloved," she moaned softly as Starlight placed the pot back on its brewer to stay warm.
"Hard to believe it's been a year already," Starlight sighed as she sat down and began to trace absentmindedly her hoof around on her place. She still had a bit of flour from when she was making the pancakes on her hooves, and slowly started to sketch out her and Sunburst's cutie marks linked together. "Year of school, year of Twilight ruling Equestria, almost a year of me and Sunburst..."
"Don't remind Trixie," Trixie grumbled testily. It wasn't like that when she helped Starlight and Sunburst, it was because she wanted to ensure her survival. If she had her own choice, she would have galloped into Sunburst's room and charmed him with her overwhelming charisma to date her instead. Perhaps offer a bit of money, too.
Honestly, she could still do that, but not annoying Starlight to Tartarus and back was a good thing. Starlight was nothing if not a jealous marefriend.
For a moment, Starlight remained quiet, as she seemed to ponder something in her head. Trixie could see just by her slight eye movements that she was bringing up and discarding ideas one by one. Finally, she looked over at Trixie and asked, "I'm still coming up blank for what should be our opening ceremonies for the new semester, though. Any ideas?"
"Well, we should put up warning signs first," Trixie quipped as she finally took off her sleeping hat and shook her mane out of its messy mop-like appearance.
"For what?" Starlight narrowed her eyes and peered at Trixie.
"Because of the griffon incident," Trixie explained nonchalantly. She eyed Sunburst's food one last time before she heard the growl come from Starlight's throat and thought better of it.
"And that ties to this how?"
"Because of your blatant abuse of magic, of course," Trixie replied without a single care, almost relishing in the brilliant scarlet that was spreading across Starlight's face. Kicking back in her chair, Trixie leaned back and then stared at the ceiling. "Honestly, Trixie isn't sure how you can live with yourself after hurting those poor mares, Starlight."
"Trixie," Starlight snarled, although she soon let out a deep breath. Trixie could hear a few sparks of magic bounce on the table, though, followed by the stench of scorched crystal tile. A feat only Starlight could pull off.
"Yes, Starlight?"
"I was the one who saved them from getting snapped in half from you and Gallus' boneheaded idea!" Starlight growled, gritting her teeth and glaring at Trixie with narrowed eyes. Some veins on her neck pulsed with heightened pressure, and she heavily heaved a couple of times.
"Trixie remembers differently," Trixie responded, still completely unaware of the danger that was probably in her future. "All she remembers is poor Gallus coming to her without a single clue how to ask Silverstream out, and Trixie getting an idea." She shrugged. "It was perfectly executed, until you had to disrupt it."
"I don't think, 'Ow, my legs aren't meant to twist that way,' is an expression of support," Starlight retorted as she managed to calm herself enough to not instantly blast her friend into the next dimension. After all, cursing Sunset's world with two Trixies would be disastrous.
"Well, Gallus was about to ask Silverstream from his perch when you had to ruin the whole thing," Trixie snarked back, finally letting her chair fall back to the ground loudly. "Honestly, Starlight, you should know better."
"He was fumbling it, and you were letting him hurt creatures!" Starlight protested before she groaned and rested her forelegs on the table. Propping her head in her fetlocks, she slowly rubbed her temples and grumbled, "I'm getting a headache."
"Whatever, we can agree to disagree," Trixie replied with a wave of her hoof. "He got her in the end, meaning the Resourceful and Ingenious Trixie won again!" She lit her horn, and a small array of fireworks and streamers exploded behind her. Just as quickly as she summoned them, she banished them away, although not the smell of gunpowder that came with the fireworks.
"Are you at least going to answer that lawyer's letter?" Starlight asked.
"What lawyer?" Trixie inquired innocently, batting her eyelashes at Starlight. At that, Starlight groaned.
"Ugh! The lawyer that has sent ten letters in the last five days?!" Starlight demanded, getting a perplexed stare from Trixie. In a flash of magic, she manifested one of the letters that had lain unopened in the foyer. Slapping down on the table, she jabbed a hoof at it "One of these?! Demanding one hundred thousand bits in damages to her clients?! Those mares that I 'hurt'?!"
"Doesn't ring a bell," Trixie answered with a shrug, leaving Starlight to grind her teeth together before flinging the paper away.
"Face reality, Trixie!" Starlight snapped.
"Trixie chooses to substitute Starlight's reality with her own," Trixie shot back with a smirk and a smug wink. Starlight merely growled in frustration before falling back in her seat in defeat. Trixie did stare at the letter for a second, then mused on how exactly she could get the lawyer off her back. Perhaps changing names and living in her wagon for a while would be an option.
As Starlight was about to continue on with her tirade over Trixie's willful ignorance, her jaw hung limply as Sunburst trudged into the room, still wearing his cyan robe and fuzzy slippers that Starlight had gotten him for Hearth's Warming. Within seconds, Starlight's anger seemingly melted away, and she cooed softly to him, "Hey, Bursty."
"Glimmy," he answered automatically, trudging past Starlight and taking the remaining coffee that was in the pot and pouring it into a massive mug. On it was written "Momma's morning boy," and there was a very visible splotch of lipstick on the writing. Barely visible was Stellar Flare's signature.
"Sleep okay?" Starlight inquired as he thumped into his seat and guzzled down some of the coffee.
"Uh-huh," he muttered, munching on a pancake and robotically taking the newspaper from Starlight to begin reading it. In only a few seconds, he seemed to have eaten the entirety of the food on his plate and was gulping down the coffee from his mug.
Starlight giggled contentedly as she stared with a dopey expression at Sunburst. Trixie just rolled her eyes. It had been like this for months. Months! How could anypony remain so lovestruck after dating another for months?!
She could almost understand it. After all, she did truly, deeply love her hat, Pointy. But even she didn't make googly eyes at it all day. That was reserved for herself and a mirror.
With Sunburst's interruption, the conversation mostly died in the kitchen, outside of the occasional question by Starlight to him that went answered with monosyllabic statements. Inwardly, Trixie snorted. The studying and work of vice-headmare had definitely turned Sunburst, who was the bright-eyed one when he and Starlight started dating, to the grumpy, caffeine addict.
Not that she related with the latter point. She could stop her tea consumption at any point. As long as the tremors didn't start and she didn't get the sudden urge to maim and kill for another cup.
Within minutes, Sunburst was finished with the paper, and after slurping down the remaining few drops of coffee in his mug, he sighed and let it clink loudly on the table as he slammed it down. Stretching his back, he stated, "Sorry, Glimmy, but… but I have to study for another exam today." He looked at her plaintively and pushed his glasses back up the bridge of his nose.
"I-I know that you were probably wanting to do something special for our first New Year's together, but, well..." He awkwardly scratched behind his head. "I'm not sure if I can make time for it."
"Oh," Starlight answered, suddenly sitting up rigidly and staring off into the distance, beyond even Sunburst. While he didn't appear to notice it, Trixie certainly did, and she hummed softly in thought.
"Sorry," he mumbled and cantered up to her before wrapping a foreleg around her. Pulling her into a tight hug, he rubbed his chin on her head for a moment, and she leaned into him with a soft coo. He breathed in her mane and sighed before he released her. After giving her a final nuzzle, he muttered, "Maybe once I finish the exam in a week or two?"
"Sure," Starlight answered, still completely stunned as he gave her a light peck on the forehead and then trotted away.
Watching him depart and listening to his hoofbeats begin to fade away, Trixie was barely able to keep herself from retching at the saccharine display of affection that had taken place. Starlight was still gazing out of the kitchen, a thousand-yard stare taking over any other emotion she might have been feeling.
"Okay, what's the—" Trixie began to ask before Starlight screamed and smacked her face into the table. "Problem?" She sighed and bemusedly looked at Starlight, who was moaning in pain as she kept her face firmly planted into the table.
"I wasn't planning anything for tonight!" Starlight finally exclaimed as she jerked her head up, her pupils slightly constricted in panic. A few bits of her mane had grown frizzy, and a slightly anxious tremor had worked its way into her left ear.
"I'm not ready! What do I do for tonight?! Does he still want to do something tonight?! Was that a hint?! Is there some secret stallion code that I have to interpret?!" Starlight began to breathe rapidly, short gasps escaping her lips as she jerked her eyes around the room.
"Starlight," Trixie began, a bored expression on her face.
"I have to plan the meal, find the food!" Starlight whimpered.
"Starlight."
"And then, what if he doesn't like it?! Will he break up with me, just after Hearth's Warming?!"
"STARLIGHT!" Trixie shrieked before using her magic to clamp Starlight's muzzle tightly shut.
"Yeff, Trikffee?" Starlight asked as best she could through the field that was surrounding her mouth. Some sweat trickled down her face, and her pupils were still nothing more than pinpricks.
"Breathe," Trixie commanded as she released Starlight. As Starlight obeyed her, thankfully, she asked, "Do you need to do something special?" She shrugged. "Trixie is pretty sure that Sunburst would appreciate the thought of you cooking something for him as a treat."
Gazing at Trixie like she'd just grown a second horn, Starlight gasped, "Seriously?! We've not even been a thing for a year, and you want me to treat it like it's nothing?!" At Trixie's small nod, she exclaimed, "Ugh! It's like you want him to break up with me!"
"While Trixie may actually want that," Trixie began, ignoring the glower that Starlight shot her, "she knows that this means a lot to you, but you are working yourself up over nothing." She smirked. "Remember that he just wanted hayfingers at that Prench restaurant."
Starlight winced. "Don't remind me."
"Trixie just did." Trixie's grin grew wider, and she patted Starlight patiently on the back. "So, maybe just make him some hayburgers exactly how he likes it, and spend a bit of time in his room?" She held Starlight's head up to give her a reassuring gaze. "I'm sure he'd love it."
"No," Starlight answered with a shake of her head.
"Of course not," Trixie huffed and leaned back into her chair. Rolling her eyes, she mumbled, "Nopony seems to listen to the Wise and Experienced Trixie." She threw up her hooves in disgust.
"It's not that, Trix," Starlight clarified as she pushed herself off her chair and clip-clopped over to her friend. Giving Trixie a quick embrace, she added, "Thanks for the input, but I have to do this right." She cleared her throat. "So, I'm thinking, maybe a bottle of wine, a nice entrée, and perhaps some hoof foods?" She scratched her chin in thought.
"Can you get all that done today?" Trixie inquired as she arched a brow. Slipping off her slippers, she poofed them all away to her bedroom and then summoned her cape, which she quickly clipped on. She sensed an excursion was almost upon them.
"Probably," Starlight admitted with a slight blush. "I have to do this right!" She sighed. "So he knows he did right by me."
"Remember the last time you two went fancy..." Trixie warned with a click of her tongue.
"There's no angry Prench ponies this time around, Trixie!" Starlight stated with a slight raspberry. "It'll be perfectly fine!"
"Uh-huh," Trixie quipped, leveling Starlight with a miffed expression. "Trixie's totally not heard that before."
Ignoring her friend's sarcasm, Starlight gave Trixie another hug, and then quickly did up Sunburst's dishes and tidied up the kitchen. When things were as clean as she could get them, she sighed and then trotted out into the tiny hallway before entering the wide foyer. As she reached the exit to the castle, Trixie in tow, she held her head up high, wrapped a scarf around her neck, and slipped on a toque. Rearing onto her hindlegs and confidently pointing out into the great outdoors, she cried, "Next stop: Hay-Mart!"