Kung-Fu Equestria 3

by Lady Umbra


Training

Twilight’s anger fought against worry as she moved throughout the village. Panic and fear shined among the ponies and Changelings. From the crowd, Spike came through, spotting Twilight and running to his sister’s side.

“Twilight…” Spike said somberly.

“You heard?”

“And saw,” Spike said with a nod.

Twilight sighed. “You can go ahead and say ‘I told you so,’ now.”

“Not right now,” Spike replied. “We need to get you out of here.”

“Why? There’s nowhere to run to!” Twilight began gathering various items from the village.

Spike tilted his head. “Then… what will you do?”

Twilight looked up in determination. “I’m going to fight.”

Spike blinked. “W-Who exactly?” Her face said enough. “B-But Twilight…”

Twilight didn’t let him protest, running off with the items she had gathered.

Once Twilight found a big enough clearing, the Celestial Warrior arranged the items into a training dummy that resembled the Jade Slayer. With a fierce gaze, Twilight began sparing with the dummy, making it swing around with rapidly increasing speed.

Twilight maneuvered around the dummy’s swings until one arm smacked the side of her face. Twilight merely growled, shook her head and continued training. All the while, Spike watched her with worry on his face.

Already knowing Twilight wouldn’t be deterred, Spike’s gaze shifted from his sister to her brother's house. Unfurling his wings, Spike flew up to the house.

The dragon crossed the bridge and entered the building that held the shrine dedicated to Shining’s parents. Shining was sitting in front of said shrine.

“Mother… Father,” Shining whispered. “I’m sorry.” He lowered his head. “I failed. I couldn’t keep her safe.”

“Mind if I join you?” Spike asked.

Shining flinched, before noticing Spike. “Y-Yeah, sure,” Shining replied, patting the ground as Spike sat next to him.

For a moment, both of them were silent.

“You know, you weren’t the only one who lied,” Spike admitted to the unicorn. “Twilight wasn’t the only one I was worried about.” The dragon turned to Shining Armor with a small smile. “I was also worried about you.”

“Can’t blame you,” Shining replied with a shrug “I failed my sister and my family.”

Without hesitation, Spike smacked the unicorn upside his head. “Don’t talk like that,” Spike reprimanded. “My father said only a coward and a fool talk badly about themselves.”

Shining rubbed the back of his head, and found himself chuckling. “My father used to say the same thing.” He grinned. “He would’ve gotten along with yours.” A thought occurred to him. “Did your parents… help you with Twilight?”

Spike looked down. “They died before I found Twilight.”

Shining winced. “I’m sorry. I didn’t…”

“It’s okay.” Spike looked up wistfully. “Mom was always frail. She contracted Crystal Fever when I was 8. We couldn’t afford treatment, so my father worked himself ragged to make enough money,” Spike shut his eyes. “His exhaustion and lack of sleep caused him to fall into the river with a pack of bricks on his back. Mother joined him a few days later.”

“I’m sorry,” Shining repeated, however, he was shocked by the smile that managed to grow on the dragon’s face. “How can you smile ever after retelling how your parents passed?”

“Because before she passed, my mother made me promise that no matter what, I would always smile,” Spike said as a tear left his eye. “The same smile that would always make her smile.”

Shining pondered his words for a moment. “Spike?” he asked. “Why were you worried about me?”

Spike chuckled. “It’s stupid now, but… I thought you were going to steal Twilight from me.”

Shining gaped. “What?!”

“I know. Like I said, it was crazy.” Spike laughed as he wiped away his tears. “But I realized having you in Twilight's life doesn't mean less for me. It means more for Twilight.”

“Well... I'm not in her life.” Shining Armor dropped his head in shame. “Not anymore.”

“She got mad at you.” Spike chuckled as he nudged the unicorn’s shoulder. “That doesn’t mean your not in her life anymore, it’s just being a family.”

“But you don't understand.” Shining argued. “I lied to her. She'll never forgive me.”

“I lied to that girl for twenty years,” Spike refuted. “When she was younger, she thought she came from an egg.” Spike laughed at the more positive memory, before gazing at the sky wistfully. “Sometimes we do the wrong things for the right reasons.” Spike looked at the picture of baby Twilight and her family before returning his gaze to Shining. “Look, she's hurt. She's confused. And she still has to save the world.” Spike pulled out a miniature painting of his own and placed it next to Shining’s painting. “She needs both of her brothers, now more than ever.”

Spike stood up and patted the unicorn's shoulder before walking out proudly. Meanwhile, Shining gazed at the painting Spike placed on the shrine. The painting showed Spike standing proudly with a massive grin on his face, a black Hanfu with a white symbol meaning Dragon [龙]on his left chest. A pair of dragon wings were spread out from his back as his right fist rested on his waist while his left was flexed, all the while a giggling little filly wearing a Dragon onesie hung from the dragon's arm.


Twilight was smacked once again by the dummy. Growling, the Celestial Warrior pulled her fist back and attempted to strike the dummy again. However, a cyan hand grabbed hold of her fist.

“This isn't going to work,” Rainbow said sternly as she threw Twilight's hand down.

“It has to!” Twilight resisted shouting.

“You're not thinking straight, Twi,” Rainbow replied in a calm but stern tone.

“Yes I am,” Twilight said, trying to move past Rainbow.

“You're not.” Rainbow blocked Twilight’s path and pushed her back.

“I am,” Twilight insisted, trying to move past her friend.

“No.” Rainbow spun the unicorn around.

“Yes!” Twilight threw an elbow at the pegasus which then turned into a full-blown fight, neither giving ground.

“No!”

“Yes!”

“No!”

“Yes!”

“NO!”

“YES!”

“I’VE SEEN TIREK, TWILIGHT SPARKLE!” Rainbow boomed as she grabbed hold of the Celestial Warrior’s arms. “I've seen what he can do.”

“But he hasn't seen what I can do.” Twilight broke the hold before grabbing hold of Rainbow’s hand and flipping over her with her first finger held within Twilight’s grip before her pinkie extended.

“The Wuxi Finger Hold?” Rainbow questioned with a raised eyebrow.

“It’s my best move,” Twilight argued. “I just have to get to Tirek, grab his finger, and then Bam!” Twilight wiggled her pinkie for emphasis. “Back to the Spirit Realm.”

Rainbow interlocked her fingers around Twilight before bending it back enticing a hiss of pain from the unicorn. “Tirek has an army of jade warriors.” Rainbow bent Twilight’s arm further. “Everything they see, he sees. There's no sneaking up on him.” The rainbow master then kicked Twilight’s feet out from under her before pinning her to the ground. “You will never get close enough.”

“It's gotta work,” Twilight grunted in pain as she kicked Rainbow off her. But the rainbow master evaded, getting her foot on the unicorn's throat.

“He can only be stopped by a master of chi,” Rainbow insisted, removing her foot from the Celestial Warrior's neck.

Twilight groaned. “Sweet Celestia, you sound just like Luna with the chi. Chi this. Chi that. Chi-chi-CHI!” Twilight shouted in frustration. “But I'm not a master of chi! OK!? I don't know if I'm the Celestial Warrior. I don't even know if I'm the one destined to stop Tirek. I don't…” Twilight’s anger turned to despair. “I don’t… know who I am!” Twilight sighed and slumped down. “You're right.” Tears dripped down her face. “I don’t know how to stop him.”

Rainbow knelt on her level. But before she could speak…

“What if you had an army of your own?”

Twilight turned and was met with the sight of her older brother. Shining Armor stood there, his eyes averted in shame, but his body set in determination.

“You?” Twilight questioned.

“Not just him.” Spike moved forward to stand by Shining’s side. “Us.”

“All of us,” Antenna added, as the entire village stepped up behind Spike and Shining.

Shining approached Twilight. “I finally found my little sister after all these years.” He placed hand on her shoulder. “It's gonna take a lot more than the end of the world to keep us apart.”

Twilight smiled, but her smile faded. “But… you guys don't even know Kung-Fu.”

“I may not know Kung-Fu” Shining Armor admitted, before conjuring up a sword and shield with his magic. “But Father taught me how to fight. And for the rest of us…”

“You can teach us,” Antenna offered.

Panic immediately flashed across Twilight’s face as she recalled the memory of her first class. ”Oh, no…” Twilight stammered. “No no no no, I can't teach you kung fu!” Twilight gestured towards Rainbow Dash. “I couldn't even teach Rainbow, and she already knows Kung-Fu!”

The cyan pegasus reluctantly nodded her head in agreement.

“Twilight, I…” Shining sighed. “I know I'm the last guy you wanna trust right now.” Shining gazed at her pleadingly. “But you gotta believe me: we can do this. We can learn Kung-Fu. We can be just like you.”

Twilight paused at her brother's words. “What did you just say?”

“We can do this?” Shining repeated

“No, after that.” Twilight inched closer

“We can learn Kung-Fu?

“After that-after that.”

“Uh…” Shining glanced at Antenna, who shrugged in confusion. “We can be just like you?”

Twilight brightened. “Yes… I GOT IT!”

Shining brightened. “Yeah?”

“That's what Master Luna meant,” Twilight said thanking her fallen master. “I don't have to turn you into me. I have to turn you into you.”

Shining paused. “Uh… that didn’t make sense.”

“I know!” Twilight hugged both Spike and Shining. “Thanks, guys.”

“You're… welcome?” Spike offered, still confused.

“I'm gonna do something I never thought I'd be able to do.” Twilight grinned as she calmed down. “I'm gonna teach Kung-Fu.”


Twilight walked in front of the villagers with an ever-present smile.

“Unlike the great master before me, Master Luna organized training to fit my needs and desires,” Twilight said using her magic to pull several books from a stack next to her. “For me, Luna used my interest in books to motivate me and gain my focus.” Twilight set the books back as she looked at each of the villagers. “Your real strength comes from being the best you - you can be. So, who are you? What are you good at? What do you love? What makes you - you?” Twilight motioned encouragingly. “I want you to show me what you love and then I can work from there.”

Twilight watched the inhabitants of Twilight Village scatter as they did what they were good at. Moving to a group of young unicorns, the Celestial Warrior watched them kicking hacky sacks in the air.

“Yes, good. Keep it up.” Twilight said, moving on as Rainbow watched in confusion.

The next group was a small pack of changelings that changed into perfect duplicates of Twilight, and then into Rainbow.

Twilight grinned at this as she moved around them. "Impressive," Twilight complimented, moving to the Changeling Queen.

Queen Antenna gave Twilight a warm smile as she approached with her ribbon in hand. The changeling queen began to spin the ribbon around herself as she danced around the unicorn.

"You danced like that during dinner?" Twilight observed.

"It’s one of the things I pride myself on," Queen Antenna said as she wrapped her ribbon around the Celestial Warrior before pulling her close. "Well, that and mothering an entire Hive of course,” she added with a flirtatious wink.

Twilight chuckled, before untangling herself and moving on.

"Twilight,” Rainbow resisted begging. “Please tell me you figured out how to train them.”

"Have some faith in me Rainbow," Twilight replied, more focused on observation.

"But when are you going to..." Rainbow was cut off when Flurry flew right for her and latched onto her mane. "AUGH! She's got my mane! SHE’S GOT MY MANE!”

"Rainbow Baby!" Flurry squealed in glee as Cadence pried her off the rainbow master.

Queen Antenna was the first one Twilight returned to with a training plan. Replacing her ribbon with a ball and chain, Twilight watched as Antenna’s ribbon dancing translated perfectly to utilizing whips, and weighted items as weapons, smashing through training dummies, while also utilizing agility gained from acrobatics and a lifetime of love making to pull off seductive gymnastics that would make even one of Tirek’s jade zombies blush.

Rainbow Dash watched in confusion, as despite the non-traditional method, Antenna proved herself more than capable. And before Rainbow knew it, Twilight was moving on to a changeling who enjoyed turning into a bear and scaring ponies.

"I want you to use that bear strength of yours and hug this log," Twilight said levitating one of the logs she used to make her dummy closer. "Hug it like it's the last thing you'll ever hug in your life!”

Twilight watched for a total of thirty-five minutes before the log was snapped in half. The unicorn smiled and nodded, before she moved to the side and motioned to a boulder.

"Now crush this" Twilight said before thinking to herself. "if he can crush this then he can restrain master Rockhoof.”

The changeling gave the boulder a bear hug with all of its strength, unfortunate 3 hours later there wasn't so much as a crack in it. the changeling glanced towards his master before being engulfed in emerald flames, Twilight was taken aback when the changeling turned into Roar. Wrapping its beefy yak arms around the boulder, the changeling managed to crush the boulder.

The next group that Twilight moved to was the group of hacky sack players. "You guys are doing great, but now I want you guys to try it with this." Twilight brings out several rocks before tossing them toward the ponies and setting up a series of empty bottles around them. "Try and hit each bottle.”

After a good hour or so, the Hacky sack group manages to get a handle on their task. Twilight’s smile widened as she created several balls of magic.

“Don’t let any of these hit the ground,” Twilight instructed. "These are orbs of concentrated magic; the moment they touch the ground they'll pop and knock you back." Twilight threw them up into the air and watched as her students moved to keep the magic in the air.

The last group was the changelings that turned into the Celestial Warrior.

"You lot certainly have some of the best attention to detail I've ever seen." Twilight grinned as spoke to the changelings. "This ability will be key in what I have planned. How long can you hold a transformation?"

"A form like this?” One changeling replied, turning to normal. “We can hold for days.”

"However,” another changeling added. “Something that isn't a living creature we can only hold for about ten minutes to thirty, depending on our level of concentration.”

Twilight nodded. “Alright. I would like you all to turn into the largest boulder you can muster!"

The changelings did as instructed.

"Good,” Twilight praised. “Now this will test your level of concentration.”

Twilight then pushed the closest changeling down the hill. Not even five feet down, he changeling returned to his original form.

"This will be your training," Twilight said, as she used her magic to bring the first changeling back to the top of the hill. "You'll need to hold your form long enough to hit your enemy."

It took almost all day long, but by the time the sun began to set, the changelings were able to hold their transformations. Twilight looked over to the other students before exhaling in relief. Each and every creature was crushing her instructions with precision and accuracy.

"They're ready," Twilight said with relief.

“Are you sure about that?” Rainbow asked before noticing the alicorn filly wrapped around her leg. “How do you keep sneaking away for your mother!”


The moon began to rise as the villagers gathered around one of the dining tables. Twilight had laid out a map of the village, and pointed things out with a tree branch as she explained her plan.

“Pharynx?” Twilight pointed toward the entrance on the map. “This is the only entrance to the village, right?”

“Affirmative,” Pharynx confirmed with a nod.

“Good,” Twilight replied. “Rainbow told me that whatever the Jombies see, Tirek will see as well. So, I want the children over here where I placed… the… cookies.”

Twilight stammered as she watched the children snatch up the cookies that had served as a placeholder on the map. One froze at her glare, but slowly went back to chewing the cookie he had stolen. Twilight sighed.
“I should have seen that coming,” Twilight admitted, before shaking it off. “Anyway, our little bear? You need to keep the biggest Jade Zombie busy.”

“Roger,” the changeling grinned, shifting into Roar again.

“Now the changelings will be stationed here,” Twilight said pointing to an area on the map before looking at Queen Antenna. “Ann, I want you to handle the Blossom Twins.”

“Of course, dear,” the Changeling Queen nodded before Twilight turned to Urtica and her brothers.

“Urtica, you and your brothers take care of any stragglers in case they decide to go after Cadence and the others.” Twilight looked towards her brother. “Will Cadance be okay protecting the rest of the children and elderly?”

“Her barrier magic far exceeds my own,” Shining said with a nod. “She’ll be fine so long as we keep the Jade Zombies away from her.”

“Good to know,” Twilight replied. She pointed to the part of the map depicting the frozen lake. “This is where Tirek will need to be when this all goes down.” She looked up at her group. “You all need to distract the jombies long enough for me to get close to Tirek and put the Wuxi Finger Hold on him.”

“Then it sounds like we have a plan,” Antenna noted, before turning to everyone. “Take this time to relax, everyone. If you have a partner you want to declare undying love to or just need a bathroom break, now’s the time.”

The ponies and changelings scattered to gather themselves for the upcoming battle. Twilight remained where she was, unrolling the jade scroll to a drawing of Celestia and Tirek battling. Re-reading the scroll, Twilight felt a tug, and saw Shining looking at the scroll himself. He unrolled the page further to reveal a drawing of the unicorns healing Celestia with chi.

“Shining?” Twilight asked.

Shining Armor sighed in defeat as he gazed at the scroll. “I... I wish I could have taught you this, Sis.”

“It's okay, Shining,” Twilight said, giving her brother a reassuring smile. “I'm…”

Twilight paused. Her ears flicked as she picked up a sound: metal cutting through air.

Everyone in the village stopped, turning as the sound drew closer.

Rainbow’s eyes widened in horror, and she turned to the entrance. Her fists clenched.

“He's here.”