//------------------------------// // Chapter 5: Bridlewood...is Depressing // Story: The Tale of Neon Light // by DeffBwade //------------------------------// The Tale of Neon Light Written by DeffBwade Chapter 5: Bridlewood...is Depressing "A unicorn forest sounds magical, he said." "This does not look magical in the slightest," I said as we all stood at the entrance of the forest, which looked creepy, dark, and had several signs posted on the trees that warned of the dangers and to turn around and go away. "Literally looks like a map from Missing by Midnight." We all just stared at the forest while Izzy had a smile on her face. Must be because this does lead to her home after all. "Come on! My house isn't far from here!" Izzy said happily as she skipped into the forest and started singing. "We're really walking into this creepy place?" I muttered as me and the others followed closely behind, my heart starting to race a bit. The inside of the forest looked much worse. It looked like not much light is able to penetrate the trees above, making it look gloomy. It all just gave off this foreboding vibe. And the rustling of leaves or every small critter noise didn't help at all, "Just so you guys know, if a ghost suddenly pops out of nowhere or a pony in a mask comes charging at us or a spider lands on me at any point, I will actually scream and run away." "Calm down, Neon. This place has...character," Sunny whispered to me, albeit a bit hesitantly as she was trying to find the right word to describe it in a nice way. "Sunny, look around you," I whispered back to her with a deadpan, "I don't mean any offense, but this place would make a great setting for a horror movie. And it's not like there's just gonna be this giant beacon of light in the middle of this pla—...my gosh!" I said with a dropped jaw as we arrived to a house with sun shining its light upon it, and colorful leaves blooming brightly. "Welp, here we are guys!" Izzy announced before opening the door, "La Vila Izzy!" We all walked in and were amazed at just the sight. If I had to describe Izzy's home in two words, it would be bright and artistic. There was a portrait made up of colorful macaroni pieces and googly eyes. There was some kind of instrumental object with bottles on strings and spatulas and spoons attached to a roller. When Sunny cranked the lever, it played an admittedly catchy tune that could go along great with a show designed for foals yet grown ups can still enjoy. "Did you make all of this?" Zipp said, impressed. "Yup!" Izzy nodded. "Unicycling. Isn't it funky?" "It is gorgeous~" Pipp complimented in a singing voice while flapping her wings. "I also made friendship bracelets" Izzy said as she pulled out a bowl with various bracelets, before remembering something, "Oh wait, wait, watch this, hold everything!" she yelled as she ran off and came back with some flower-like contraption, "I never got to use this with actual friends!" The flower then opened up, revealing a teacup on each of the six petals and a teapot in the center. "Ta-da!" Izzy said. "Okay, that's cool," I said as me and the others were impressed at the unicorn's ingenuity. "I so wished I had live-streamed that!" Pipp commented. “We don’t have time for that right now.” Sunny said suddenly, apparently being the only one not impressed (talk about a killjoy), before explaining, "If we’re gonna get the information we need on the unicorn crystal, we can’t stick out like sore hooves. We need to look like unicorns.” "Yay! Makeovers! I love makeovers!" Pipp cheered with joy. "No, no... This is not what I signed up for," Zipp said, laughing nervously, as she is not a fan of makeovers and dressing up. "Dudes, we don't need makeovers. We literally just have to cover our wings and wear fake horns," I deadpanned before turning to the lilac unicorn, "So Izzy, think you can do it?" "A glow up?" Izzy asked, drinking some tea and then putting her cup down with a smirk, "Honey, you came to right cottage." I thought Earth ponies were the pony ladder's bottom rung I heard that pegasi were brutes, you'd hate to be among You smell like fishes (you're vicious) I bet you eat your young Meet any one of you, the thing to do is run away But although, I know we're all a bunch of different breeds Take away our wings and horns, and we're just frightened steeds So, let's put aside our differences just 'cause what we need's a win Oh-oh-oh Come on, rip out all the pages of your history books Just because we're undercover doesn't mean we're crooks When we walk, you through the crowd and give your brand-new looks a spin You're gonna fit right in This is a new low You're gonna fit right in It's never gonna work! They taught us unicorns were super scary maniacs With horns like razors and tongues like tasers and teeth like tacks They take your hooves and then they grind them into midnight snacks The basic gist of it is unicorns are not okay Look, I know we're risking everything for this endeavor But look at us, we're brave and strong and weird and clever We're running out of options and we're desperate to begin You're gonna fit right in Ha-ha, if you say so You're gonna fit right in I know you will, now watch and learn This is how a unicorn walks (walks) And this is how a unicorn talks (talks) This is how a unicorn hoops (hoops) This is how a unicorn Oops (oh, geez, stop!) This is how a unicorn struts Oh, watch you shake your unicorn butts Now you're in the unicorn know (wow) Soon, you'll be a unicorn pro Oh, a unicorn horn makes a unicorn stride It's the more-head on your forehead, it's the source of your pride Every unicorn who's born, has worn a horn that's unique So We’ll whip them up as we speak, you be lookin' très magnifique We'll fake a pony protrusion To make a bony illusion It's not the perfect solution But the world's not big on inclusion And with those rocks in our pocket, we'll reap the reward And folks'll be floored, we'll strike a new chord Our magic restored Lately, all of Equestria has lost its heart But if we can help to find it, we should play our part If we fail, we'll go to prison But if not, we'll start to grin So, let's begin This is how a unicorn walks This is how a unicorn talks Now you're looking unicorn strong This is how a unicorn ends this song After an epic musical montage of crushing, killing, destroying, and swag, we were finally ready to head into Bridlewood itself. We all had these fake unicorn horns, and Zipp, Pipp, and I also wore these cloaks to hide our wings. I gotta give it to Izzy. She sure knows how to make a nice looking cloak. Not gonna lie, but the cloak made me feel...I don't know...elegant? Special? Is this what being royalty feels like? Anyways, not only did we look like unicorns, but we also know how to act like unicorns. We now know how a unicorn walks. How a unicorn talks. How a unicorn hoops. How a unicorn...oops. How a unicorn struts. How to shake our unicorn butts (don't ask). Now we're in the unicorn know. Now we're unicorn pros. #UnicornSwag After a while of more walking through this forest, we finally arrived to Bridlewood and found several giant and shiny crystals at the entrace. "Ta-da! Crystals! Crystals! Crystals! Crystals!" Izzy exclaimed with a smile, pointing at several of them. "She does know we’re looking for just the one, right?" Zipp asked jokingly. "What does the unicorn crystal even look like?" I asked before joking, "Like a unicorn horn?" "Yes, actually," Sunny responded. "Oh..." I said, my joking face dropping a bit. As Izzy continued running through the town and singing about crystals, we got a good look at the citizens. And through them I can now see that Bridlewood...is depressing. Everpony was moving so...sluggishly and had forlorn expressions on their faces. "Ow. Ow," said an elderly one that kept repeatedly getting hit on the head by apples. She made no effort to move and she just sounded so emotionless, as if the apples didn't actually bother her. A couple of foals were playing with horseshoes, but with bored expressions and no enthusiasm whatsoever. "Hey," somepony greeted another unicorn in a deadpan tone. "Hey," the other unicorn replied, also in a deadpan tone. On a nearby playground, a foal was sliding down a slide so slowly, another was on a swing but wasn't swinging and instead just laying on it, and a third one on a seesaw was barely putting in effort to make it move up and down due to them not having a partner to play with. "Izzy grew up here?" I questioned, "This place is...sad." I guess due to their magic disappearing, Bridlewood just, as Izzy would probably say, lost its sparkle. "Well this is cheerful..." Hitch said sarcastically. "These other unicorns seem so different than you," Sunny pointed out. "Yeah, I get that a lot. My sparkle is a little to sparkly for Bridlewood," Izzy responded. "How can you tell which ones are magic?" Hitch asked as he looked around. "Oooh! You said a bad word!" the foal on the swing suddenly said dramatically, pointing at Hitch, "Hurry! Before we get jinxed!" The other two foals stood up along with the first one before all started doing some kind of chant. The stretched up rump first before making a raspberry noise, and then they started to jump around in a sort of dance like manner. "Bing bong bing, bing bong, bing bong, bing bong," the three chanted. It was both very confusing that made question if there was something wrong these foals, and very funny that I had to struggle to hold in my laughter. "Okay... I’m gonna need some context," Zipp requested as we all, sans Izzy, stared in confusion. "Unicorns are very superstitious. If a pony ever says a forbidden word, we have to a ritual to ward off the jinxies," Izzy whispered, trying to keep a low profile about our fake identities. "Jinxies?" Pipp questioned. "Bad luck," Izzy continued. "Forbidden words?" Hitch asked. "Magic, wing, feather…oh, and mayonnaise," Izzy listed off. "Wait, what?" I questioned upon hearing that last one. "What's wrong with mayo—" Hitch tried to ask, but Izzy ran over and covered his mouth. A nearby unicorn perked upon Hitch almost saying the word, but went back to normal and continued walking after a few seconds, to which Izzy let go of Hitch's mouth. Jeez, I may not be a mayonnaise fan myself (in fact, I hate it), but never would I have imagined it being a forbidden word to say. "Note to self: ask Izzy for some clarification," I mentally noted. "Come on, there’s something I wanna show you!” Izzy said as she started trotting down the path. We followed her and eventually reached a building that I honestly would've mistaken for a wall of leaves if it wasn't for the doors and the sign. "The crystal tearoom?" Sunny read aloud. "There’s a pony inside who collects crystals. Maybe he can help us!" Izzy explained. "That’s great Izzy. Oh, and Hitch," Sunny leaned towards the stallion. "I know, I know. No forbidden words," Hitch played off. "Heh, you didn't say anything about me," I internally smirked, "So I will gladly say them whenever I want. But only if our cover gets blown, of course." Are these forbidden words considered profanities? Upon entering the tea room, the first thing we saw was, you guessed it, more depressed unicorns. Oh, and tea. Plenty of tea. "Earth pony jinx, something stinks, Pegasus neighs…" a unicorn on the stage with a beret...sang? "Poetry. You gotta love it." "That’s the pony I was talking about" Izzy whispered, gesturing to a unicorn sitting by himself at a table, to which Sunny nodded and approached him. "So, word in the forest is you collect crystals," Sunny said to the unicorn, which caused him to perk up. "Yes! I do... Well, I mean I did. I lost them all in a limbo contest with… Alphabittle!" he exclaimed, and it doesn't take a psychologist to detect the fear in his voice as he said that. "Oh no..." Izzy exclaimed, actually showing worry. "Why am I kinda scared to ask who Alphabittle is?" I asked with a bit of worry myself. Before Izzy could answer, a bell suddenly run, catching our attention over to the counter. "Time's up! Pass it over, Jasper!" said a large, heavyset unicorn with a medium gray coat, dark gray hooves, freckles, and brown eyes. He also had a wispy white mane and tail, bushy eyebrows, sideburns, and a beard. The unicorn he was talking to was trying desperately to solve a Rubik's cube, but quickly gave up with a defeated sigh. The gray unicorn then grabbed the cube and quickly solved it in just a few seconds before slamming it on the counter and demanding, "Guess that makes me the winner...again. Pay up!" "...Fine," the defeated unicorn said before putting a glass jar with a festive tree inside and walking away. "You could always try winning it back!" the gray unicorn called out, "All right, suit yourself." "Holy... Now that right there is somepony that you do not wanna mess with," I whispered with a chuckle, but upon noticing Izzy's still worried expression... "That's Alphabittle, isn't it?" "Yeah..." Izzy sadly nodded. "Aw nuts," I muttered. "Wait, there it is!" Sunny exclaimed. I looked where she was looking and saw what had to be the unicorn crystal (it was actually shaped like a unicorn horn), "I’ve got an idea. Maybe I can beat Alphabittle at his own game." "Wait," Izzy stopped Sunny in her tracks and warned, "Alphabittle can smell fear." "Got it" Sunny nodded in response, then began walking over to the counter. While Izzy was worried that Sunny had to face against this intimidating stallion, I myself was worried for another reason. "Is it just me or do you guys feel that whatever Sunny's planning is a bad idea?" I asked. "What do you mean?" Zipp asked back. "Well, think about it. You all saw what that unicorn had to do when he lost. He had to give up something of his. And Alphabittle said the he can always win it back. That means that when it comes to his games, we have to bet something that belongs to us, in which it's either a win or lose situation. And the only thing that we can really bet is..." I stopped in my explanation when we all saw Sunny using the pegasus crystal as an offering, "Oh no..." We immediately ran over to Sunny and pulled her aside. "What are you doing?!" Zipp asked with concern. "Don't worry," Sunny shrugged off, "I could solve that cube puzzle in my sleep." "But if he wins, we lose both crystals!" Pipp pointed out. "We won't. Trust me," Sunny reassured, but I was still not convinced. "Sunny, as somepony that played video games all his life, let me tell you something. The stakes will always be as high as the reward value," I advised. "Um...what?" she asked with confusion. "What I'm trying to say is that he's obviously not gonna make it as simple and easy for you to win when you're offering a special crystal that could help bring back magic," I warned. "Izzy," Alphabittle called, "If your friend is finished stalling, do we have a deal?" Sunny pondered for a second, but it seemed my persuasion didn't deter her as she just walked back to the big unicorn. "I hope you know what you're doing, Sunny," I thought with a sigh. "Deal," Sunny firmly stated, "Now give me that cube!" One of the critters was about to give Sunny the cube, but Alphabittle quickly snatched it away, shaking his head. "No, no, no, no, no. A special prize calls for a special competition," he said. As a random spotlight (not gonna ask where it came from) shined down on Alphabittle, he turned to the side and dramatically declared, "Bring forth the ultimate challenge!" "The ultimate what now?" Sunny asked. More spotlights revealed a large machine with colorful floorpads, flashing lights, and a title that reads: "Just Prance." "A dancing game," Sunny deadpanned, "Seriously?" "I knew it. Sunny, I hope you're good at dancing," I mentally sighed, "Expect for the worst, hope for the best, I guess." "Both ponies agree. Best out of three," the unicorn on the stage announced. "Let's make this more interesting. You only need to win one out of three," Alphabittle said with a cocky grin as he and Sunny took their place. That actually made me have more faith in the apricot mare. "Huh, maybe we have a chance after all," I thought with a bit of a smirk, "It's usually the cocky ones that lose...most of the time at least." As the song began to play, the machine displayed a set of colorful horseshoes for the two ponies to follow in order to dance to the music. Sunny was...admittedly at a bad start as she started dancing late and was slow to follow the prompt, while Alphabittle was pretty much showing he was an expert as he racked up a high amount of points in no time. Before long, the machine played a bell sound and declared Alphabittle the winner of the first round. "Yeah!" Alphabittle hollered. "That's how you do it!" "Yay," the unicorns spectating cheered, albeit dejectedly. "I-It's okay!" Izzy reassured to Sunny, "You're just warming up!" "Yeah. I-it's only the first round," I reassured as well. "What can you do?" the stage unicorn asked, "Round two." And with that, the two began in another dance off. Unfortunately, just like the previous round, Sunny was slow in her steps, and therefore falling behind, and therefore leading to Alphabittle winning once again. "Yeah!" Alphabittle cheered, "Critters, get my crystal polish ready, would ya?" "Well crap." "Round three. Who will it be?" the poetry unicorn asked. "Wait, what? I thought it was best of three. And that means first to tw—" I thought before shrugging, "You know what? I'm not complaining." "Ohhh. Here goes nothing..." Sunny moaned, now getting very worried as it was all or nothing at this point. "Hey!" Pipp called to Sunny. "You hear that, Sunny?" she gestured to the music playing in the background, kinda dancing along to it, "Feel the rhythm take you over. You feeling it?" That seemed to motivate Sunny as she smiled and started to move her body along with the beat. "Oh, I'm feelin' it. I'm feeling it!" she said, all pumped now. "Yeah, you are, Sunny!" Pipp cheered, "Yeah, you do this, Sunny! Whoo!" Initiate the final round. And like how most of any PvP matches go, Sunny, who started off on a rocky start, has suddenly become an expert and started to make an epic comeback, racking up points like there's no tomorrow. Until finally, she managed to surpass Alphabittle's score. "Yes! She's doing it!" Hitch smiled, "She's doing it." "You got this, Sunny!" I cheered. Alphabittle, on the hoof, was feeling the pressure from his opponent suddenly surpassing him, and tried to dance as fast as possible. It was a close match, but the bell finally rung and declared Sunny as the winner! "We won," Sunny said as she panted heavily, while Alphabittle and other spectators just stared in disbelief, "We won! WE ACTUALLY WON!" "Yeah! Let's go, Sunny!" I cheered along with the others as we gathered around. Everything was going our way for once...until Sunny's horn came flying off.