//------------------------------//
// 7 – Outside the Frame 
// Story: Chromatic Aberration 
// by Avery Day 
//------------------------------//

With my work shift nearing its end, I reflected on what a weird, eventful, but ultimately disappointing day it had been.

Earlier this morning, I was sure today would end in disaster. The walls were closing in on me faster by the hour. The girls were going to leave me behind right after Dash kicked me while I was down. That was the conclusion I came to the night before, and for a time, I couldn’t have been convinced otherwise.

That was until Rainbow Dash chased me into the bathroom. While it was a harrowing pursuit, it ended on a hopeful note. She had actually apologized to me—something I would have never expected to happen, ever—and I got a chance to apologize to her as well. On top of that, Rarity and Applejack weren’t even upset that I unintentionally included them in our squabble. They just seemed happy we were able to settle things. I thought that, maybe, things were going to finally start going my way.

So when we walked to lunch together, I was optimistic. After such a climactic conversation, we were on the way to making major strides. We would sit down as a group, have a talk about everything that happened, and maybe we would all understand each other a little bit better at the end of it.

That was how I felt until after lunch. After our talk, my confidence in our future felt more or less the same as it did before yesterday. Maybe things weren’t as catastrophically bad as I initially thought, but it didn’t seem like anything would be different either. The results of our “discussion” (if you could even call it that) would have been dissatisfying regardless of my outlook going into it.

The conversation only lasted a few minutes. When I arrived at the table, I was the first one to apologize for fighting and stressing everyone out. Delivering that apology was nerve-wracking, so I almost felt offended when what I said hardly seemed to register with anyone. Dash followed with an apology of her own, though hers sounded less sincere than the one she offered me in the bathroom. Perhaps foolishly, I expected everyone to say their piece after that.

Instead, no one except Fluttershy had much to contribute, and what she said wasn’t that significant either. She was just happy to see we were going to try to get along, and that was it. That was to be expected, though. Fluttershy wasn’t much of a talker as it was, so of course she’d be short on words. Surely the rest of them would have had something to add, right?

Of course not. Everyone else just kind of nodded and moved on. The rest of our time at lunch felt like every other day, the only difference being that everyone was awkwardly trying to pretend the day before never happened. Just like that, it was all over. I felt so stupid for spending an entire night worrying myself to the point of total exhaustion over that.

Then again, I’m not really sure what I was expecting. For months, any time things got heated between me and Dash, the girls rarely ever intervened. Band practice last week was the only time I could remember anyone coming to my defense. Every other time, it was as if they expected things to work out on their own. As long as they refused to acknowledge what was happening, then the problem would just go away.

All in all, I felt like I was back at square one. It may have been day zero of our truce, but I wasn’t holding my breath for things to meaningfully change between me and Rainbow Dash anytime soon. When it came down to it, her apology was less motivated by a desire for forgiveness and more by a need to placate Fluttershy. She might have said that wasn’t her only reason, but I wasn’t sure how willing I was to believe that anymore.

Dash probably wouldn’t put forth any more effort beyond maintaining an image of peace between us. As long as things never got that tense between us again, her friendship with Fluttershy would be fine, the girls wouldn’t interfere when she treated me like dirt, and that would be good enough for her. Maybe I was being pessimistic, but I had an abundance of evidence to back my beliefs.

The events of the school day were still incessantly running through my mind as Skates and I finished up our closing duties. When I arrived at work this afternoon, I had hoped it would be busy enough to help me forget about it for a bit. Unfortunately, work was unusually slow for a Friday, and there wasn’t much to do for most of my shift. Ordinarily, I would be grateful, but today I needed something, anything, else for my brain to focus on.

With a sullen sigh, I continued to sweep the floor in the back room. If nothing else, there was only about half an hour left in my shift. It’s not like inner peace was waiting for me back home, but at least there I could distract myself with things I like to do. That was assuming I didn’t collapse from exhaustion the moment I got to my apartment.

The sound of the freezer door opening suddenly grabbed my attention. Skates had started organizing the freezer around the top of the hour, and I’d almost forgotten he was in there. He shivered as the large metal door slowly shut behind him, his pine-colored face splashed with pink from his time in the frigid storage room.

“Hey! You didn’t die!” I quipped.

“I know you’d be lost without me, but I was only in there for, what, twenty minutes?” Skates slipped himself out of the thick coat he was wearing, placing it on the hook next to the freezer. “Of course, I wouldn’t have taken so long if the openers did their fuckin’ jobs.”

“Come on, Skates. Be fair,” I appealed. “There were only two people on the schedule for the shift before us. They probably just couldn’t get around to it.”

“Yeah, I know,” he said, breathing on his cold hands as he rubbed them together. “That’s not gonna stop me from bitching about it.”

I smirked at him. “You could always try bringing that up with Fish Fry,” I jokingly suggested. “I’m sure he’d be willing to hire more than just a skeleton crew for the first shift.”

“Great idea!” Skates sarcastically exclaimed. “After all, I’m sure Fry isn’t just trying to cut corners by hiring as few people as he can get away with. That doesn’t sound like something he’d do at all!”

“Oh, absolutely not,” I agreed. “With how well he pays us, we should be willing to do two jobs at once.”

“Now you’re getting it!” He rolled his eyes, tying his long olive hair back into the bun he usually kept it in. “Though, now that I think about it, I might have better luck convincing all the dead fish in the freezer to organize their own containers.”

Our playful commiseration gave us both a good laugh. Afterwards, I looked back down and continued to sweep. Skates carefully walked by me as he made his way over to the back room computer sitting atop a nearby desk. That’s where he typically spent the remainder of our closing shifts together. It was always his favorite part of the night, and I could tell simply by the fact that he didn’t have to get up and do anything else until we had to leave.

For a few minutes, the only sounds that could be heard were the broom bristles brushing the ground, the click-clacks of a keyboard and mouse, and the gentle ambience of the mall bleeding through the doorway to the back room. A typical end to a typical closing shift. Usually, I appreciated this kind of atmosphere, but it wasn’t long before today’s events crept back into the forefront of my mind. Tonight, the quiet was more maddening than it was peaceful.

Thankfully, Skates broke the silence before I had a chance to descend too deep into another thought spiral.

“So, Shimmy. What was so important that you had to leave me hangin’ Wednesday?” He asked, not taking his eyes off the screen.

“Huh?” Having been too distracted to parse his words right away, my brain managed to put together what he said before he could repeat himself. “Oh, it was nothing. I just wasn’t feeling that great, that’s all.” I didn’t want to lie, but I couldn’t think of a better excuse, and the true reason wasn’t his business anyways.

“That’s all, huh? I thought ‘something came up.’ So what happened to that?” he asked, a hint of playful suspicion in his voice.

Even if his tone was friendly, I still wasn’t willing to budge. Skates might be my favorite coworker, but I still made an effort not to talk about my life outside of work.

“What’s it matter? You gonna rat me out?” I didn’t really expect him to, but I was hoping that rebuff would have him take a hint.

“Aww, come on Shimmy. You know I wouldn’t do that.”

“Then why do you want to know my business so bad?”

Skates let out an exasperated exhale. “Jeez, I’m just tryin’ to make conversation.”

Before I could go back to sweeping, he turned away from the computer screen, a smile accompanied by an uncharacteristically concerned look in his eyes. “Besides, I’m a little worried about you, you know? You’re usually pretty quiet, but you’ve been real quiet today. Why don’t you tell me what’s on your mind?”

Once again, I felt compelled to shut him out, but before I could muster up a response, guilt began to set in. Not only was he concerned about me, but he had just taken a huge risk on my behalf a couple of days ago, even after he initially said no.

Yet here I was, giving him the cold shoulder like he was any other coworker. After everything he’d done for me, that wasn’t fair. As much as I wanted to keep my work and personal life separate, I owed him at least some kind of explanation.

“Look, you don’t gotta tell me if you don’t wanna, but we got another thirty minutes before we can clear outta here, so at least help me kill some time.”

Despite his offer to talk about something else, I resolved to answer his original question.

Glancing over to the side momentarily, I looked back at him and began to speak. “A friend of mine needed a ride, and after I dropped them off they asked if I wanted to hang out. So I decided to stick around and spend some time with them.”

A smirk spread across Skates face as he leaned back in the computer chair. “Ahh, I see. So what’s his name?”

“It’s not like that.” I answered, making it clear I was unamused.

His sly grin widened. “Oh, my bad. What’s her name?”

For some reason, my cheeks felt warm upon hearing that question.

“If this is how you’re gonna be, we’re done talking for the rest of this shift.” I snapped.

His smile faded as he held up his hands defensively. “Alright, chill, chill. I get it; it’s not like that. What all did y’all do, though?”

“Not much.” Looking down again, I continued sweeping. “She volunteers at an animal shelter, and she asked if I wanted to help out, so that’s what we did.”

He raised his eyebrows as he nodded. “I gotta be real, that is not what I expected to hear.”

“Really? And just what did you expect to hear?”

“I dunno. I guess it’s kinda hard to imagine you working at an animal shelter. You just don’t seem like the type.”

“What? Do I seem more like the puppy-kicking type to you?”

Looking off to the side, his playful grin returned. “Hey, your words, not mine.”

I glared back at him, my expression turned sour. “Go to hell.”

Skates giggled to himself, idly rocking back and forth in his seat with his hands behind his head. “Nah, but for real. That’s just a weird reason to miss work. I’m not trying to imply nothing, but that girl must be hella special if that’s why you took the risk we took just to spend time with her.”

“That’s one way to put it,” I remarked softly.

The room went quiet for a few moments afterwards. Content to leave the conversation at that, I went to sweep another part of the back room. I didn’t look at Skates, but I could tell his eyes were following me as I walked past his desk.

Eventually, he broke the momentary silence with a scoff. “Well? Come on, Shimmy! You can’t just leave it at that. Gimme deets!”

“You asked why I was out, and I gave you an answer,” I asserted, squinting at him.

“I know, but we still got time to kill, and unless you want me to assume it actually is ‘like that,’ you gotta give me something to work with.”

I groaned. “You’re the worst, you know that?”

“So I’ve been told. But hey, if you tell me more, I’ll make it worth your while.”

For some reason, he seemed completely unwilling to let this go. Unsure of why he was so desperate to know or how he would make good on that promise, I resigned myself to answering yet another one of his questions. With a deep sigh, I propped the broom up against a nearby wall and sat down on one of the many plastic containers strewn about the back room.

For a few moments, my mind scrambled to come up with a way to tell the story. As much as I’d rather just be upfront with him, I didn’t quite feel like touching on how I used to be. I got enough reminders of my past at school, and the last thing I needed was my coworkers learning about it too.

“Well, up until this fall, me and this girl really didn’t like each other. Then, one night, we sorta talked things out, and I’ve been trying to do what I can to get along with her since. It’s just… things have been kinda weird.”

Skates looked confused. It was as if he hadn’t expected my explanation to go this way. He leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees with his hands clasped together. “Weird how?”

Biting my thumb, my eyes darted around the room as I thought about how to follow up.

“I just get the feeling she’s only being nice because she’s afraid of me. When we used to fight, I was really mean to her. Like, really mean. So I feel like she’s just trying to make sure that, if we do get in another fight, I won’t hurt her this time.” I paused to let out a hushed exhale. “Like insurance…”

“I see,” Skates replied. “So if you two did get into a fight, do you think you’re gonna hurt her again?”

Before an answer could leave my mouth, I hesitated. That was a question I’d asked myself many times before, but it felt different hearing it from a voice outside of my own head.

“I don’t want to, no.” Looking down at the floor, I rubbed the back of my head. “To be honest, I still feel really guilty about how I treated her.”

“So then, what’s the problem?”

Our eyes met once again as I shot him a perplexed look. “What do you mean?”

Skates leaned back in his chair again. “Let’s say you’re right—this girl is just trying to be nice for insurance or whatever—why does that matter? As long as both of you are playing nice, why worry about why she’s being nice and shit? Why worry about what might happen? Why not just focus on the here and now?”

“Because I–” Those words escaped before I had actually thought of a proper response. After a brief pause, I settled on the only thing I could think of. “It’s complicated.”

He nodded, looking at me as if he was waiting for me to explain further. When I didn’t follow up with anything, Skates spoke up once more.

“Look, I know there’s probably way more to this than what you’re telling me, but you want my advice?”

If I were to be honest, I would have immediately said no. His advice probably couldn’t be that relevant considering how little he knew. More than anything, I just wanted to stop this whole conversation. But if I did, he’d probably continue to prod until I opened up again.

“Sure, go for it,” I reluctantly accepted.

“Go with the flow.”

Expecting more than just those four words, I waited for a few seconds before responding. When he didn’t say anything else, I gave him an incredulous look. “Go with the flow?”

“Go with the flow,” he repeated. “Stop thinking about how things might go, and just let things happen as they do. Don’t try to prepare yourself for anything, just react to things when they happen. Like, yeah, it sucks that she’s still afraid of you, but there’s nothing you can really do about that if your history sucks as bad as you say it does. You both keep getting along, though, and she’s probably not gonna feel that way forever.

“You don’t know if y’all are gonna start fighting again, and even if you do, it’s not gonna happen the way you think it will. You keep stressing over it, though, and you might end up making something bad happen by accident.”

My jaw hung slightly agape as I processed his words. It’s not like I thought Skates was dumb, but I didn’t expect an answer like that to come from him of all people. It was kind of shocking.

It was equally irritating as well. He was as relaxed as he was confident in his solution, and that frustrated me. Not because I thought he was wrong—quite the opposite, actually. Skates knew so little about my situation and how complicated it truly was, yet I found it impossible to argue with his assessment. Was I too stressed and sleep-deprived to come up with a decent rebuttal, or was his response right?

Either way, even if his view of the situation was limited by what he didn’t know and what I hadn’t told him, that really did seem like the most clear-cut answer. Part of me wanted to believe I was giving in so this conversation would end, but I knew it was also because there was truth in his words.

“I guess you’re right,” I replied.

“Of course I’m right,” he remarked, leaning back in his chair. “I said it.”

My lips curled into a half-smirk as I rolled my eyes at him. “I just hope you have more wisdom than modesty.”

Skates frowned as he put his hand on his heart, acting as if he were offended. “Unbelievable!” he exclaimed. “And here I was about to let you go for the night.”

“What?” I stood up from the container I sat on. “Come on, that’s just dirty.”

Skates grinned and laughed. “I’m just fuckin’ with you, Shimmy. Get outta here, I’ll clock you out.”

“Thanks, Skates. You’re the best!”

“Don’t I know it, babe,” he replied.

As I made my way to the exit, I stopped myself at the doorway and turned to face him again. “And thanks for the talk. I needed that.”

He kept his smile, but a subtle shift in his face told me it was genuine rather than playful. “I do what I can,” he responded. I departed as he turned his attention back to the work computer.

It was a small gesture, but getting to leave even just twenty minutes early was a relief. As much as I liked talking to Skates, I really didn’t want to discuss my situation any more than I already had. Before his generous dismissal, it was a choice between that or sitting there in silence for the remainder of my shift, so having to choose neither of those was a welcome alternative.

Before leaving the restaurant, I grabbed a paper cup from behind the counter and filled it with soda. If I was going to drive home without passing out, I’d need a little bit of caffeine in me.

As I made my way out of the mall through the sparsely populated food court, a familiar voice brought me to a sudden halt.

“Sunset Shimmer? What on earth are you wearing?”

Whipping my head around, my eyes met with Rarity’s. In her arms were two bags, both filled to the top with what looked like clothes and piles of various fabrics.

“Nice to see you, too, Rarity,” I shot back with a deadpan glare.

She smiled nervously. “Apologies, I didn’t mean to offend, darling. It’s just that what you’re wearing is far from your usual attire.”

For a moment, I attempted to think of a decent lie as to why I was wearing my uniform. Unfortunately, my brain was almost completely out of juice, and even if it wasn’t, I doubt I could come up with anything believable. As much as I didn’t want anyone at school to know where I worked—including my friends—I saw no way to avoid telling her without being rude.

“That’s because it’s my work uniform,” I answered, pointing my thumb over my shoulder behind me. “I work at the sushi place with the dumb name over there.”

She looked behind me, then back to me. “Strange,” she replied. “As many times as I’ve been to this mall, I don’t think I’ve ever seen that establishment.”

“Yeah, go figure,” I flatly responded. “Anyway, I’m going home now.”

Before I could even turn around, Rarity stopped me. “Actually, since you’re here, I was hoping you wouldn’t mind chatting with me for a little while?”

My first instinct was to just say “no” and walk away, but I couldn’t bring myself to. Sure, I probably could have said I was too tired to talk, but ironically, I didn’t even have the energy to do that.

“Fine, sure,” I begrudgingly answered. I walked over to a nearby table in the food court, placing my cup down and taking a seat. Rarity took the seat across from me.

“What do you want?” I said, trying my best not to sound as annoyed as I was.

“I just wanted to see how you were doing,” she replied. “You sounded quite frazzled during your talk with Rainbow Dash, and you were rather quiet after a certain point during lunch. Not to mention you look positively exhausted.”

“I’m fine.” I looked down at my hand as my fingers drummed against the table. “Haven’t slept in a day or so, but I’ll be alright. Nothing I haven’t been dealing with for a while.”

Rarity frowned. “Goodness, what’s kept you awake for so long?”

“Don’t worry about it.”

“I can’t just not worry about it,” she contested. “You’re my friend, Sunset. Of course I’m going to worry.”

Hearing that was as nice as it was irritating. She was telling me she cared, and that felt nice. But how much did she actually care? My exhaustion wasn’t anything new, and it should have been plainly obvious considering the bags that had been under my eyes for weeks at this point. If she were truly concerned, she would have noticed way before now.

All that aside, I wasn’t willing to argue about that, nor was I willing to divulge the reasons for my chronic lack of sleep.

“Thanks, but really, I’ll be alright,” I deflected.

“Well, if you say so.” Rarity seemed unsatisfied with that answer, but I was thankful that she was relenting.

I thought about getting up and leaving after that, but as I finally looked back up at her, the expression she wore made me feel guilty. Even if this interaction was stilted, it was clear she was trying her best. Besides, I probably wouldn’t get very far before she roped me back into another conversation.

“So, you were eavesdropping during that whole thing in the bathroom, huh?” I asked. It didn’t occur to me how antagonistic that sounded until it left my lips.

“I don’t believe it’s fair to call that eavesdropping.” Despite how unintentionally snide my question was, she didn’t sound too offended. “May I remind you that it was you who ran up to me and threw me as you two sped by? After that, I had every right to know what was going on.”

Bashfully looking away for a moment, I lightly exhaled through my nose. “Fair enough, I guess.”

“Now, if you would please answer my question: how are you feeling?”

“Like I said, I’m fine. At least, as fine as I can be after a day as weird as this one.”

“That’s good to hear.” Rarity’s tone and body language gave me the impression she didn’t believe me. She shifted around uncomfortably in her seat. “I know I said this at lunch, but I am glad you two seem to have come to an understanding. Truthfully, I don’t agree with how Rainbow Dash has treated you these past few months, and I’m certainly not the only one who feels that way.”

My brow furrowed at that. Maybe that should have made me feel better, but it didn’t. It sounded like she was just trying to get on my good side, but given how long all of this had been going on and how little she, or anyone else got involved, it had the opposite effect.

“Could have fooled me,” I sardonically remarked.

Rarity looked back and forth before her eyes returned to mine. “Pardon?”

“I mean, it’s not like what’s happening between us is new,” I explained. “Like you said, we’ve been at this for months now, and she’s been acting like that the whole time. And yet hardly anyone ever says anything to her about it. The only thing different about this time is that it was impossible for you all to ignore like usual.”

As frustration built up in my tone, I stopped myself momentarily before continuing. Even if she hadn’t intervened much, Rarity didn’t deserve to be talked to this way. My expression softened as I let out an exasperated sigh.

“Look, I’m sorry. I’m not trying to fight you on this. It’s just that, after everything that’s happened, I don’t really know if I can believe that.”

“I suppose I understand why you feel that way, but it’s not like I don’t want to help, dear. It’s just…” Rarity grabbed her chin, looking down at the table as she thought of what to say next. “Don’t take this the wrong way, but I rarely get the impression you want me to say anything. Or that you want any of us to step in, for that matter.”

My eyes narrowed. “What do you mean?”

“Well, by the time I notice you two are butting heads once more, you’ve either handled it yourself, or you’ve walked out on us. And I’d rather not interject when my input would be unnecessary.”

For a few seconds, I just stared at her. I wanted to believe her, but I couldn’t wrap my head around her excuse. Every time Dash and I went back and forth, every time she said some snarky bullshit, every time I had to back down before things escalated, I always felt like I looked weak and pathetic. How could she not see it that way? Was that really what she considered ‘handling it myself?’

“So is that your subtle way of saying you think I’ll bite your head off for coming to my defense?” I asked.

“N-No! Not at all,” she stuttered. “It just seems like you know when to quit. Admittedly, that’s something I find rather admirable.”

As much as I didn’t want it to, a wan smile spread across my face.

Rarity briefly smiled back before continuing. “Honestly, darling, I’m more afraid of Rainbow Dash’s reaction than yours. That, and I have a suspicion that Rainbow Dash is acting the way she does for a very… particular reason.”

“You think?” I asked. “She’s still mad about all the shit I did to you guys. I thought that’d be pretty obvious at this point.”

“Perhaps ostensibly, but I believe her feelings on the matter are far more complicated than that.”

I raised an eyebrow. “What are you talking about?”

“Oh, come now,” she insisted. “You must have questioned her motives by now. Surely you don’t think she’d harbor a grudge like this for so long, do you?”

“Yeah, actually, I do,” I contended. “I tried to kill you guys. As far as reasons to hold a grudge, I’d say that’s probably the best one.”

Rarity looked off to the side with a tight lipped smile, shrugging one of her shoulders. “I suppose that’s fair.” Her eyes met mine once more, narrowing as they did. Her smile widened into a sly grin. “But haven’t you ever wondered if there’s anything else? Perhaps something she’s embarrassed to admit to anyone? Hmm?”

It was clear she was trying to play some kind of game with me, but I was in no mood for it.

“No,” I answered plainly. “In fact, she made that pretty clear yesterday.”

Her impish demeanor briefly faltered as she rolled her eyes, her shrewd grin returning moments later. “Well, I believe there’s a much deeper reason, and I believe you may be oblivious to all the signs in front of you. But fear not! I’m an expert on such matters.”

I picked up my cup, responding before taking a sip. “You’re losing me.”

“Oh for goodness’ sake,” she muttered, her volume suddenly increasing, “Rainbow Dash has a crush on you!”

Turning my head away from Rarity, I spit my drink all over the table next to us, the fizzy liquid  burning my windpipe as I started to cough. Despite choking on the soda that had already gone down my throat, I tried to sputter out a response.

“Wh-What the fuck are you talking about?” I wheezed.

Rarity giggled at my volatile reaction before responding. “I understand your disbelief, but when you think about it, it’s the only thing that makes sense!” she emphatically proclaimed.

Grabbing a napkin from the dispenser on the table, I wiped my mouth off and began cleaning the mess off of the other table.

“That doesn’t make any sense at all, actually,” I responded, my voice still sounding slightly choked. “Who the hell acts like that towards someone they like? Besides, I don’t even know if she likes girls.”

Rarity didn’t say a word, but her doubtful smile and raised eyebrow were enough to convey her message.

“Okay, fine, so she probably does,” I conceded. “But still, even if she liked me—which she doesn’t—I don’t like her. At all. Also, why does this even matter? Why are you telling me this?”

“I merely wish to offer an alternative explanation for her hostility, as well as a reason why I’m hesitant to interfere,” she answered. “When it comes to matters such as these, I am never wrong.”

None of that did anything to make me feel better. If anything, it just pissed me off. If I weren’t so exhausted, I would have probably started raising my voice at her. Even if what she said was true, it was a bullshit excuse for not speaking up when Rainbow Dash treated me unfairly. However, with a deep breath, I took a moment to swallow the outrage mounting inside of me. As I let it out slowly, I found a response.

“So you don’t step in because you don’t want to hurt her feelings or whatever, but she can say and do anything to me and how I feel doesn’t matter. Am I hearing that right?”

“Wh– No, of course not!” Her face flushed as she stammered out her reply.

Fortunately for her, that thought was as far as I was going to take this argument. I was in no state to escalate things, even if I felt like I had the right to.

“Whatever. Is that everything? Or can I leave now?”

To my dismay, that wasn’t everything. “Just one more thing” she nervously replied. “Last I checked, you hadn’t responded in the group chat, but the girls and I have been planning our next sleepover. The current plan is to hold it at my house next week. Would you be interested in joining us?”

The reason I hadn’t said anything in their group chat was because I muted it over a month ago. The few times I had said anything in it, no one ever acknowledged it. That, and it made my phone go off constantly.

Naturally, I felt compelled to reject her offer at first. After today—and especially after this conversation—I was finding it hard to want to be around any of them. But maybe that was just the irritability from exhaustion. Maybe I could give a non-answer now, and decide based on how I felt after a little more rest; assuming I could get any.

“That all depends,” I replied, “when and what time? If it’s a weekend, I’ll probably have work.”

“We were thinking about either next Friday or Saturday, the latter being the more preferable option.”

Of course, the option that worked better for everyone else was the one that worked the least for me. If it was on a Saturday, that would mean I’d be showing up after an eight hour shift. Not only would I be tired from the inevitable lack of sleep, but also from working for so long that day. Whatever the case, I could answer without committing now, and decide later next week.

“I’m pretty sure I have work both of those days, but I’ll think about it and let you know when I can.”

Rarity smiled from ear to ear. “Excellent! Do let me know as soon as you can so I can make proper accommodations.”

“Right,” I answered in a lukewarm tone. “Now can I go?”

Still smiling, Rarity rolled her eyes. “You are dismissed.”

I tried to flash her a smile back, but I found myself only able to tighten my lips into an imitation of one. Thankfully, she didn’t seem fazed by my lack of enthusiasm. With that, both of us stood up from the table and began making our way out of the mall.

Walking away felt a little awkward. Not just because of our conversation, but because we took the same path out of the building after saying goodbye. That always felt weird. When we passed through the exit, we thankfully both went different directions in the parking lot. Her car was parked much closer to the entrance than my motorcycle was. In what felt like a few blinks of an eye, I was going through the motions of starting my bike up.

As I rode home, I pondered Rarity’s offer. It had been a little while since the last sleepover I attended. The last one was actually the first I had ever been to. It was held at Pinkie Pie’s right before our exams for that semester. It was just as uncomfortable as you would have imagined—everyone around me was having a good time, and at no point did I ever feel like I was a part of the fun.

Since then, I've turned down every offer to come to a sleepover. It wasn’t just because I didn’t want to feel out of place again – though that was certainly a big part of it—but it was also because I didn’t want me waking up from a nightmare to disturb the rest of them. During the last sleepover, I hadn’t awoken anyone else; the dream that night had been mercifully tame in comparison to some of the others. But would I be so lucky a second time?

Just the thought of that happening made me cringe. Rising up in the middle of the night screaming, my sleeping bag being soaked in sweat while I sat there, hyperventilating. Everyone would ask me what was wrong, and what would I be able to say to that? Even if I could come up with a lie, there’s no way they would believe me. There was only one reason why anyone would do that in the middle of the night.

Still, even with that in mind, going to the sleepover might be a good idea. I was frustrated at how today played out, and since it was all so fresh in my mind, it was swaying my verdict. We didn’t make the kind of progress I thought we should have made today, but that didn’t mean there was no progress. That didn’t mean I should stop trying to make progress all together. Regardless, I needed more time. There was much to consider before I made my decision.

But that decision would have to wait. Right now, there’s a bed in my apartment calling out for me.

And a demon eager for me to answer it.