“But then,” Edward continues, smiling as he looks at the small group of ponies in front of him. “After 303 years, six young ponies came across us. Two are princesses, two are in law enforcement, and two are simply really good friends.”
The six ponies in front of Edward, weary and weak from sadness, smile.
“And so concludes my story. At least, until I’m in a condition to get into the finer details. Any questions?”
The ponies stare, glancing at each other as they ponder what to say.
“Whuh… What happened to the cloud?” the yellow earth pony named Sunny Starscout asks. “Do you have an idea of what it could’ve been?"
Edward sighs. “I don’t know what it was, but I know who caused it.”
“Who?”
“Princess Twilight Sparkle,” Edward replies, grimly.
Sunny is taken aback. She couldn’t believe the vile statement against the princess she had loved all her life.
“N-N-... No! It couldn’t have been her! She would never do such a thing to Equestria!”
“Twilight was mentally unstable, Sunny,” Edward states in a serious tone. “She couldn’t cope with immortality.”
“Then why did YOU do so well?! A-And what about Celestia? Or Luna? Or Cadance?!”
“She was just different. Practically a foal in an adult body, when all is said and done.”
“Whuh… WHY?!”
“It’s… infuriating, my dear. But when I was in France, I learned a phrase that perfectly encapsulates most matters. C'est la vie. That’s life.”
“And It sucks,” the white multi-colored pegasus named Zipp Storm says.
“Indeed,” Edward replies. “I’m sorry, Sunny. But Twilight isn’t the perfect nation-saving princess you’ve made her out to be. Having been in more than several therapy sessions with her, I can tell you a lot about how she really was. But those will have to be stories for another day. Now. Do any of you have other questions?”
“What did you mean by dreaming your dream?” the red earth pony named Sprout Cloverleaf asks.
“We lived in our dreams, doing whatever we wanted. Creating a perfect Sodor, living out our lives on Sodor like normal, anything we wanted to do, we did. Those were the powers given to us by Princess Luna herself.”
“Huh…”
“What happened to the other princesses? And Thorax?” the violet unicorn named Izzy Moonbow asks.
“Unfortunately, I don’t know. I don’t know where they were when Twilight snapped, and I don’t know where they could’ve gone. Perhaps we can go looking for them sometime in the future.”
“How the hay have you three survived this long?” the pale yellow earth stallion named Hitch Trailblazer asks.
“Good parts. That's about all we can say,” Edward replies. “But frankly, I don’t care how we survived. What matters is that we did.”
“So…” the pink pegasus named Pipp Petals pauses, choosing her words. “What do you want to do now?”
“Well, I think a reseating of all our parts is in order. As is some new oil. And definitely some grease. The bearings will have a fit if we tried moving them after all this time.”
“How the heck do we get you three to a place we can repair you?! We can’t just pull you!” Hitch exclaims.
“Yes you can!” Edward replies. “If you have a steam locomotive, you can fire it up and use that to pull us.”
The looks on the ponies’ faces tell Edward what he needs to know.
“So you don’t have a working train, huh?"
"Well, we do, but they aren't the right gauge," Zipp clarifies.
"In that case, you ponies are strong, aren’t you? Just assemble a team and you can pull us the old-fashioned way.”
The ponies all sigh except for Zipp.
“So, one last thing before we assemble that team…” She points her hoof to the rusty red scrap engine next to Edward. “What in the world is your story? Edward didn’t mention you at all.”
“That was on purpose,” Edward replies. His eyes narrow, and a devilish smirk appears on his face as he glances over at the engine. “Buuuut… We have an extra six hours for another life story, right James?”
The scarlet red engine groans. “At least let me get a washdown first!”
Edward only laughs. "Even after over three hundred years of being in that dirty state of yours, you still care so much about your paint. Then again, if you didn't care about your paint, you wouldn't be James!"
James returns the laugh. "Too true, love."
Edwards purrs in response.
Hitch suddenly groans. "Don't tell me you two actually refer to each other like that..."
Both Edward and James burst out laughing.
"Of course not!" Edward finally replies. "We'd never be that tacky. We talk like any old friends would."
"We just wanted to see how you six would react," James adds, causing Hitch to groan.
"Seven, you mean," Edward says.
"Seven?" James asks, looking at the blue engine.
"Yes. Seven. These six here, plus that blue unicorn mare that's been watching us from the bushes over there for the better part of the morning."
Everypony including James look into the forest, trying to find who Edward is talking about.
"Where is she?" Zipp asks.
"She was just over there! The mare with the kinky hair! Did none of you see her?"
"Edward, we don't see her," James says.
Edward sighs. "Ah well. We can figure it out later."
"Sorry for asking," Zipp begins, " but are you two really in love with each other? Even if that joke you made was, well, a joke, it kind of feels like you are."
"Zipp, science has proven that two people WILL grow closer together if they only have each other to talk to for a long time. We've been stuck with each other for over three hundred. I'd bet my boiler that ANYONE could fall in love in that time."
"...Oh. I guess you're right."
"And Edward was already into men to begin with, so that certainly helped the process," James begrudgingly says.
Edward chuckles. "Now, can one of you go assemble a team to pull us out of this forest? I'd love to see a field before the day is done," Edward says.
"And I'd like my paint cleaned as soon as possible," James adds.
"Tisk Tisk, Rail Rocket."
"Oh go to hell, Old Iron!"