//------------------------------// // Eviction Notice // Story: Cinematic Adventures: Shrek // by extremeenigma02 //------------------------------// Later that evening, the Mane Six, along with Spike, sat together just outside Shrek’s home in the swamp and about a few paces away from the house (Or at least out of hearing range). They set up a campfire at a spot near the pond, the light of the flames cast upon the murky water. For some reason, Donkey remained by the front porch of Shrek’s home, keeping an eye on the ogre while surprisingly being ‘quiet’ about it. To even suggest that it had been a tumultuous day for the group was an understatement. First, they were taken captive by Duloc guards who answered to some guy named ‘Lord Farquaad’. Next thing they know, they meet a few new friends and a giant green ogre with serious people issues. And now here they were, sitting under the stars in the midst of the swamp that Shrek called home. Apart from the pesky mosquitos which some ponies had to swat away with their tails and the occasional smells of the swamp, not to mention all the dirt and mud they laid upon, looking up at the night sky nearly made them forget how harsh this land was… almost. “Sure is a nice night out, ain’t it sugar cube?” Applejack asked Rainbow. “It’s alright,” Rainbow responded seriously. “It’d be nicer if the two of us were in a nice cozy bed instead of laying on the ground in the middle of a smelly swamp.” “Finally… some pony understands,” Rarity muttered, brushing herself. “It’ll take forever to clear all this mud off my coat… please let it be mud.” “Aw come on now, it could be worse,” Applejack replied. It was then Pinkie Pie popped up between Applejack and Rainbow Dash, placing her hooves around their shoulders. “She’s abso-positively right!” She smiled. “We could very well be stranded on some deserted island, in the midst of a big ocean, forced to make the most of our resources before we eventually go bad and resort to talking to a volleyball for company or a disembodied pig head covered in flies impaled on a spear for fear of a ‘monster’.” “… Pinkie, I swear your comparisons get crazier by the day,” Rainbow shook her head. “I know… it’s weird!” Pinkie giggled. Just then, a rustling sound drew the entire group’s attention and they jumped to their feet/hooves in preparation. Assuming the defensive stance, they glanced intensely into the darkness. Much to their relief, however, Apple White and Raven Queen emerged from the trees and into the clearing. “There you girls are!” Twilight sighed in relief. “You’ve been gone for hours; I was worried we’d have to come looking for you.” “Don’t worry, we’re fine,” Raven assured her. “We’ve been traversing this land for a very long time.” “But why were you girls gone so long?” Fluttershy asked. “As we mentioned before, we needed the time to find information,” Apple responded. “As it turns out, the majority of these fairytale creatures had been taken from every corner of this land. It doesn’t matter where they hide or who they are, Duloc’s on the hunt and they are the game.” “How awful!” Rarity gasped. “Our hope right now is to find a way to help as much as we can,” Raven nodded. The two girls made their way to join their new friends around the fire and sat alongside them. “How did you two get mixed up in all this anyway?” Twilight asked. Raven and Apple faced each other, clearly hesitant over wanting to tell these creatures. Though Apple had a sad look on her face, she gave her nod of approval. Raven released a deep sigh before facing their new allies. “It’s like this,” She began. “We come from a land known as the ‘United Fairytale Kingdoms’. It’s a land where all the realms of famous stories are joined together as one under one ruler. That being Apple’s mom, Snow White.” The Mane Six and Spike leaned closely, listening with intent as the two unveiled their story. “In the heart of the U.F.K., there’s a magical school called ‘Ever After High’,” Raven continued. “It’s a place where the children of the most famous fairytale creatures learn how to follow their fairytale destinies. For a long time it worked… that is until I showed up at the school.” “What do you mean, darling?” Rarity asked. “Well, when I attended Ever After High, I didn’t want to be an evil Queen like my mom before me. So the day I came to Legacy Day, which is where we’re supposed to sign an ancient ‘Storybook of Legends’ to follow our destinies, I refused to sign. After that day, things started changing at Ever After High. “More and more kids sought to follow their own paths rather than the ones their legacies set up for them. So they started following my example and created what’s known as the ‘Rebel Movement’.” “That still doesn’t explain how you ended up here,” Rainbow pointed out. “I’m getting there,” Raven muttered. “But I should warn you our story… doesn’t have a happy ending.” “For a long while, things were actually peaceful in the U.F.K.,” Apple continued sadly. “Everyone was getting along, things were falling into place, it was all wonderful. Then… it happened.” “What happened?” Pinkie asked curiously. “We were invaded,” Apple responded. “An unknown army in red-and-gold armor, carrying a flag of a lion, raided our lands. They… they…” Tears rolled down the poor girl’s face as she started sobbing uncontrollably. She buried herself in Raven’s shoulder, silently apologizing between cries. The dark-haired teen placed her arm comfortingly around her friend. “They cut down anyone in sight,” Raven finished. “Men… women… children… it didn’t matter to them. They burned our houses, massacred thousands, even kidnapped Apple’s mom and took her Godmother only knows where.” “That’s… horrible!” Twilight spoke in shock. “Fortunately, we managed to evade them and escaped to the outskirts of Ever After High,” Raven continued. “Being an expert on hexes, I was able to conjure up a portal through my book of spells so we could escape. Next thing you know, we landed here thinking we’d be safe… and then those knights captured us once… twice… multiple times.” The Mane Six and Spike couldn’t help but feel extremely sorry for these poor girls. To think that their own lands were invaded and neither one were prepared for an attack. Watching helplessly as everyone they knew were killed and the whole kingdom burned to the ground. They couldn’t even begin to imagine such a thing happening to Equestria, but it only demonstrated that whatever forces they were dealing with they were not their average ‘monster of the week’ villains. “Anyways…” Apple White broke the silence. “I hope you don’t mind if we invite some small company to join us tonight.” “What do you mean ‘small company’?” Spike asked, raising a brow. Raven Queen turned to the side and gave a shrilling whistle toward the darkness. Before the Equestrian heroes could say anything, more rustling was heard. All eyes turned toward the trees and sure enough a group of fairytale creatures entered the swamp. The group consisted of, but not limited to: Pinocchio, the Three Pigs, The Three Bears… sorry, ‘Two’ bears (The Papa and the Baby… no Mama), the Big Bad Wolf, Sugar Plum Fairy, the Ugly Duckling, the Mad Hatter, Tweedle Dee & Tweedle Dum, the Shoemaker’s Elf, Peter Pan carrying Tinker Belle in the cage, and a Wicked Witch. Some of them carried suitcases or any other possessions they could carry, they were grumbling and mumbling amongst each other as they looked around their new surroundings. “Right this way,” Apple White ushered kindly. “Don’t mind the mud.” “You get used to it,” Raven Queen added. “This place is a dump!” Pinocchio complained. “It’s not fit for a pig!” Wolf agreed. “Hello!! Vee can hear you!” The pigs called out, in German accents. “Vee are standing right here!” One pig added. “Look, I know a swamp is the last place we want for shelter,” Raven Queen spoke. “But you’ve all read Lord Farquaad’s decree.” “Yeah, yeah, we read it,” Pinocchio rolled his eyes. “’All fairytale creatures have been banished from the kingdom of Duloc. All fruitcakes and freaks will be sent to a resettlement facility’.” One of the fairytale creatures, the Shoemaker’s Elf, approached Apple White and tugged her sleeves. She looked toward the little elf, who’s head barely reached under her chin. “Ma’am… it smells like butt,” The elf squeaked. “I know sweetie…” Apple White spoke gently. “Now that I can agree with,” Rarity replied. “How any creature can stand to call a swamp their home is beyond me.” “Mah family have clients who live in the swamp,” Applejack pointed out. “Ya don’t hear them complainin’.” “Alright, alright, let’s make sure we’re all together,” Raven Queen spoke up. “When I call your name step forward. Pinocchio the Puppet!” “I’m not a puppet, I’m a real boy,” Pinocchio argued. Once again, Pinocchio’s nose grew with a *BWOOOOP* while some of the ponies leaned away from the extension. Pinocchio turned left and right, leaving some of the group ducking. An awkward laugh stirred out of the puppet. “Go join the others right by the fire,” Raven instructed. “Thank you very much,” Pinocchio spoke meekly, approaching the Equestrians. “Shoemaker’s elf!” Raven called out. “Ugly Duckling-“ As Raven went over the rollcall for the motley group of outcasts checking in, Pinocchio settled in next to the ponies and Spike. “Dumped on a swamp,” Pinocchio grumbled, sitting on a rock. “Man, I tell ya, sometimes being a fairytale creature sucks pine-sap!” And by the time the song came to an end, all the fairytale creatures slumped beside the Mane Six and Spike mostly chatting amongst themselves. “Settle in, everyone,” Apple White instructed. “We’ll have to make the best of this.” “Seeing as it’s our only choice,” Raven Queen replied, cringing. “Wow, this place reeks…” As the Ever After High girls helped organized the creatures, Spike slowly leaned in toward Twilight Sparkle. “What are they all doing here?” Spike asked confused. “Thought the girls said they were locked up earlier today.” “I’m not really sure,” Twilight responded. “But one thing’s for sure, Shrek isn’t going to be happy about this.” “I only wonder what he must be doing right now,” Fluttershy wondered. “Or even how he’ll feel when he sees a few fairytale creatures here.” “A few?” Raven Queen raised her brow. “Honey, I’ve got some ‘bad’ news…” <> In the meanwhile, completely unaware of the activity happening outside, Shrek was having a comfortable evening in that swamp hut of his. With a pot boiling by the fire, Shrek had just prepared dinner: A slug he had caught earlier as well as what appeared to be a pumpkin. He even helped himself to a drink, with an eyeball instead of an olive which he gulped down in a single sip. It had been hours since he had encountered those strange little creatures, who made themselves at home with the ogre… albeit they’d stay outdoors. One moment, he peered toward the door wondering if they were still out by the patio or if they had left. It had been awful quiet, even that talkative donkey was rarely silent. But he just took a breath, determined not to let the thought cloud his mind. As far as he was concerned, they’d be gone in the morning and he could return to his peaceful solitude, just the way he liked it. To finish the display on his table, he made himself a candle from his own earwax and proceeded to lit a bit of hair that was on top. Then, with the mood set, Shrek proceeded to eat his supper, helping himself to a slice of the pumpkin. From outside, Donkey watched from the window seeing Shrek sitting alone by a table which seemed to be made for more than one person. How a creature could even be content with living alone? Now that the Donkey couldn’t possibly understand. But eventually, he settled down by the front door and made to put himself to sleep despite all the activity happening in the background. How could he not have heard that big musical number earlier? Do background stars really pay attention when the cast starts singing randomly? … Fair point. But if Donkey nor any of the Equestrians had ‘any’ Earthly idea as to why Shrek preferred to be alone, the thought would never have come up. It was such a long time ago… back when Shrek was… very young… <> Flashback… Once upon a time, Shrek was but a little ogre who lived with his parents in a bog by a tree. Like all ogre homes, it was a pretty nasty place, but as mentioned before ogres ‘like’ nasty and he was happy. On his 7th birthday, the little ogre’s parents sat him down to talk, just as all ogre parents had for hundreds of years before… The parents blew their party horns over the news… but of course the little ogre looked around greatly confused. But right away, his parents packed him up to leave… And as his parents faded into the distance, the little Shrek continued walking to places unknown. Yes, it was very sad, but ogres were used to that—the hardships, the indiginities, the endless stream miser— *Random civilian screaming and running at the sight of the little ogre.* *Clears throat* And so the little ogre went on his merry way and wherever he went crowds would welcome him with festive torches, hatchets—and fun things like that. *Deploy ‘Happy Villagers’ with torches and pitchforks sneaking toward the ogre.* But whenever the little ogre tried to join in the fun— *Shrek turned and scared the villagers, sending them screaming and flailing about.* … his new friends would suddenly realize they had other things to do. *Little Shrek is replaced with Older Shrek* So, the ogre did what his parents had told him to: He found a perfectly rancid swamp and there he stayed for many years, all alone, but very happy with how his life turned out… <> End of flashback… Shrek sighed to himself as memories briefly flooded back into his head… until he caught himself humming that familiar tune. Shaking himself back to reality, Shrek was just about to take another bite of his dinner… *CREAK!* A noise drew his attention and the ogre stood up with a huff. “I thought I told you to stay outside!” He said in irritation. “We are outside!” Donkey called out. It was then Shrek heard another noise, only this time it was coming from inside his house. Shrek turned, trying to find the source. Several shadows started moving about the walls and Shrek slowly looked around. All of a sudden, he caught sight of the intruders: the Three Blind Mice, their coats white as fur and each wearing sunglasses and canes. Two of them stumbled about the table trying to find their way… all the while bumping into random objects and inadvertently making a mess. “Well, gents, it’s a far cry from the farm, but what choice do we have?” The first mouse spoke. “It’s not home, but it’ll do just fine,” The second mouse said. Off to the side, their third companion was bouncing up and down on the slug. “What a lovely bed.” “GOT YA!” Shrek grabbed the mouse, but the little devil escaped and landed on his shoulder. He took a sniff at one of the ogre’s ears. “I found some cheese!” The mouse called. The little mouse bit Shrek’s ear and he yelled out in pain. He tried to grab for the mouse, but the blind little fellow was too quick. “Blah! Awful stuff.” Eventually, the blind mouse hopped down on the table and landed on a spoon, which flipped a bit of soup right into the ogre’s face (Much to his chagrin). “Is that you, Forder?” One of the mice asked. “How did you know?” Gorder replied. “Enough!” Finally, the ogre grabbed all three mice at once. Panicked, the mice waved their canes around and struggled to break free. “What are you doing in my house?” The ogre interrogated. But before he could get an answer, something bumped him from behind and he dropped the mice. He turned around, only to find the Seven Dwarves having placed Snow White, this universe’s Snow White, on the table as she slept in her glass coffin. One of the dwarves waved sheepishly toward the annoyed ogre. “Oh, no, no, no. Dead broad off the table!” Shrek and the dwarves fought it out, pushing the coffin from one end of the table to the other, while the three blind mice made their escape. “Where are we supposed to put her?” One dwarf asked. “The bed’s taken.” “Huh?” Confused, Shrek marched over to the bedroom and threw back the curtain. And somehow, the Big Bad Wolf had snuck in and laid himself comfortable in the bed. “What?” The Wolf asked. But by now, Shrek had had just about enough. He grabbed the Big Bad Wolf by the collar and proceeded to drag him toward the front door. “I live in a swamp, I put up signs, I’m a terrifying ogre!” Shrek muttered, opening the door. “What do I have to do to get a little privacy?!” Shrek had just thrown the Wolf out the door… when he couldn’t believe what his eyes saw before him. A whole horde of fairytale creatures, with the Equestrians and their friends in the middle, setting up camp in his very swamp. Several emotions began to form in his head: Confusion… but mostly anger. “Oh, no…” Shrek shook his head. “No! NO!!!” Shrek dodged out of the way as a group of witches flew on broomsticks. All around the ogre, everywhere he looked, there was one form of activity after another. Some elves and Rainbow Dash were directing flight traffic so the witches and a few fairies had a safe place to land; Applejack and Apple White were busily serving soup to a line of fairytale creatures waiting to eat; the Pied Piper played his pipe beckoning all the rats to run to him while Pinkie gaped with awe; and the two bears sat around the fire, the papa and Fluttershy trying to comfort the weeping little bear over the loss his mother. Like that 1988 classic by that French guy… Focus please… The ogre was overwhelmed by all this activity, so many unfamiliar faces taking up all his living space. He could feel the rage start to build like a volcano about to erupt, and he could no longer hold it in… “WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY SWAMP?!!!!” Shrek’s voice echoed throughout the whole came and everyone fell silent. All eyes turned toward the angry ogre; the fairytale creatures gasped in unison. The Three Good Fairies ducked into a nearby tent, while some gnomes ducked behind a tree. Shrek’s eye twitched as he raised one eyebrow toward the ponies, specifically towards Twilight Sparkle, who chuckled nervously. “Heh, heh… uh… hi Shrek?” Twilight waved feebly. “This isn’t what it looks like—” “All right, get out of here!” Shrek ordered, waving his arm. “All of you, move it! Come on! Let’s go! Hapaya! Hapaya! Hey!” While Shrek tried to force all the fairytale creatures to go away, several dwarves and a few other creatures raced toward the ogre’s house. “No, no! No, no. Not there! Not there!” But the fairytale creatures slammed the door behind them, leaving only one unfortunate fairy behind. Shrek fiddled with the door handle, unable to pry it over. He gave Donkey and the Equestrians an annoyed look. “Hey, don’t look at me!” Donkey spoke up. “I didn’t invite them.” “We’re just as surprised as you are,” Spike agreed. “It’s our fault,” Apple White admitted. “They didn’t know where else to go; Raven and I were just trying to help—” “What?!” Shrek snapped. “Well gosh, we were forced to come here,” Pinocchio explained. “Forced? By whom?” “Lord Farquaad!” Pig #2 answered. “He hoofed und he poofed, und he signed an eviction notice.” “That’s worse than the time the Riches tried to evict me and the Cakes out of Sugarcube Corner!” Pinkie complained, then realized. “Huh… I wonder whatever happened to Spoiled and Filthy anyway…” “Well, not my problem!” Shrek argued. “Now you all need to turn around and go back where you came from.” “Go back?!” The Mad Hatter gasped. “We can’t go back!” “Farquaad vil turn us into bratvurst!” Pig #1 cried. “Is he really as terrible as everyone says he is?” Rainbow asked, skeptically. “Oh… the guy’s bad news,” The Wolf replied, reading a magazine. “Hey, may you could talking to him, da?” Sugar Plum Fairy suggested, in a thick Russian accent. “Yeah, he’ll listen to you!” The Elf squeaked. “You’re big and scary.” “I’m also an ogre, which means I stay on my swamp, and avoid large crowds,” Shrek emphasized. “Or haven’t you read the stories?” “HA! You mean those stories that say I’m a big ‘bad’ wolf?” Wolf asked mockingly. “And the ones that say I’m a ‘wicked’ witch?” Witch added. To which everyone laughed uproariously, as Pinocchio stepped up. “Or… or the ones that say I’m a ‘wooden’ boy!” To which an uncomfortable silence came, while the Equestrians looked around trying to avoid Pinocchio’s gaze. “I wanna tell him…” Applejack whispered. “Don’t you dare…” Rarity scolded lightly. “What? I’m not a wooden boy,” Pinocchio argued. His nose suddenly grew with a *BWOOOOP!*. Before anyone could say anything, he raised a finger. “I have a glandular condition.” “Whatever you say pal…” Raven nodded, cringing. “Look here, ogre, I’m gonna spell it out for ya,” The Witch approached. “We don’t want us here any more than you do. But you’re the only one tough enough to stand up to that no-good flim-flammer Farquaad.” “And what does that make us?” Rainbow asked, insulted. “Chopped liver?” “You get numbed to it after a while…” Spike replied. “Tough enough?” Shrek repeated. “You don’t even know me.” But as the Equestrians and their friends could see, these fairytale creatures were not giving up. Determined, they approached the ogre. Some of whom bent down on one knee, pleading for him to reconsider. “ALRIGHT!!!” Shrek shouted, sighing. “Alright, I get it… who knows where this… ‘Farquaad’ guy is?” At the mere mention of Lord Farquaad, all the other fairytale creatures gasped. As plain as it was for Twilight and her friends to see, not one of them was willing to answer directly. “Oh, I do!” Donkey spoke up. “I know where he is!” “He did say he was a GPS with fur!” Pinkie reminded. “Does anyone else know where to find him?” Shrek asked. Amongst the crowd, Baby Bear raised his hand eagerly. But Papa Bear quickly lowered the hand down with a shake of his head. The Big Bad Wolf and a wizard pointed at each other. “Anyone at all?” Shrek repeated. “Me! Me!” Donkey hopped about. “Anyone?” “Oh! Oh, pick me! Oh, I know! I know! Me, me!” “I volunteer to go with you!” Twilight stepped forward. The fairytale creatures gasped and murmured as the alicorn princess stepped forward. Some of whom admired such bravery from a little pony, while others thought she was nuts. “You know the way to Farquaad?” Shrek asked skeptically. “No… but some pony needs to take a stand,” Twilight replied, contrarywise. “I’ve seen what’s become of these creatures first hand; as princess, I can’t stand idly by while creatures get hurt. So we need to see this Farquaad guy ourselves and demand the right for these creatures to go free.” “Then I reckon we ought to be joinin’ ya too Twi!” Applejack spoke, facing the ogre. “We’re stickin’ with ya like caramel on a candy apple. Ya have my strength!” “And you have my magic!” Rarity stepped forward. “And my speed!” Rainbow flew above. “And my… overwhelming bag of positivity and love of parties!” Pinkie squealed. Spike made way to join the girls, when he slowly turned to see Fluttershy hesitant to go. “You know… maybe one of us should stay here and keep an eye on the fairytale creatures,” Fluttershy smiled nervously. “I mean who needs to talk to Farquaad, anyway?” “Fluttershy…” Spike tipped his head. “Okay…” Reluctantly, Fluttershy stepped forward with Spike patting the shy Pegasus gently. “Might as well be going too,” Apple White volunteered. “We owe it to these fairytale creatures after all this trouble they went through. We brought them to the swamp; now we have to get them home.” “I honestly had nothing better to do with my life, so count me in,” Raven joined in. Seeing that ‘these’ were the ragtag bunch of creatures that Shrek would be leading to join his quest, he massaged the ever-growing migraine out of his head. But beggars can’t be choosers, and he clearly knew these guys weren’t changing their minds. “Okay… fine,” Shrek sighed. “Attention all… fairytale things! Do NOT get comfortable! Your welcome is officially worn out! In fact, I’m gonna go see this Farquaad guy right now, and get you all off my land and back where you came from!” There was a brief silence amongst all the fairytale creatures, until… “YAY!!!” The whole crowd erupted with cheering and applause… which was ‘not’ Shrek’s intention at all. A group of birds draped a cloak made of flowers around Shrek’s shoulders, much to his annoyance. Some of the girls thought it funny, with Rainbow and Pinkie giggling over it. But then some birds placed a flowery necklace around Rainbow’s neck to her shock and she groaned. “You!” Shrek pointed at Donkey. “You’re comin’ with us!” Shrek brushed the cloak onto the muddy floor and made his way through the crowd. The birds came back to place a wreath of flowers on the remainder of the travelers, including Donkey. Together, the ogre, the ponies, the princesses, the dragon, and Donkey began to work their way through the crowd. “All right, that’s what I like to hear, man!” Donkey said excitedly. “Shrek and Donkey, two stalwart friends, off on a whirlwind big-city adventure.” “This is going to be the best adventure ever!” Pinkie hollered. As they walked away from the crowd, Shrek grabbed the torch from a dwarf cheering them on, who refused to let go. Shrek shook the torch until the dwarf fell into the pond. “’Time to say goodbye! Time to say farewell…’” Donkey sang. “Sing it with me, Pinkie!” “’Time for us to fly! It’s been really swell—‘” Pinkie sang. “What did I say about singing?” Shrek warned, yanking the wreathes off. “Can we whistle?” Pinkie asked. “No.” “Can we hum it?” Donkey asked. “All right, hum it.” Soon Donkey and Pinkie began humming the tune, as the whole team walked off into the night with Shrek’s torch lighting the way. As they ventured through the woods, they stumbled upon a crossroads sign pointing in various directions. One of which said ‘Duloc’, where surely Farquaad resided at the heart of it all. But there was also another sign which read, ‘DO NOT CROSS THIS LINE! OGRE BEYOND!’. While the Equestrians, Donkey, and the Princesses casually stepped forward… they stopped. Turning around, they saw Shrek seemingly hesitant to cross. “What’s the matter big guy?” Rainbow asked, with a smirk. “You’re not afraid are you?” “Of course not!” Shrek argued, sighing. “I just know once I step over this line… I’m in for the worst day of my life!” “Yes… no… maybe so…” Pinkie replied, whimsically. “Or maybe… this could be the best day of your life.” “I spent a few periods negotiating with royal diplomats as practice for ruling a kingdom,” Twilight said. “If Farquaad is supposedly behind the misery of these creatures, he may know a thing or two about the part our enemies have in this land.” “We’ll convince that guy to surrender those fiends… and restore freedom for fairytales everywhere even if we have to fight for it!” Rainbow declared boldly. “… And get your swamp back, so we can leave you be.” “Unless… you’d rather spend the rest of your life sharing your home with a bunch of squatters eating you out of house and home, hmm?” Raven raised her brow. Whatever Raven Queen did, it was more than enough for Shrek to realize the severity of his situation. Taking a deep breath, he put one big foot across the border between the swamp and Duloc then took the next step. Soon Shrek was marching ahead of the group, taking the lead once more as the rest followed him. “You know you can be really dark sometimes, right Raven?” Apple inquired. “It’s called ‘reverse psychology’, nothing to do with evil,” Raven replied. “Mom used to pull that on me all the time.” “Just let Farquaad ‘try’ and stop us,” Rainbow replied. “How scary can this guy possibly be?”