Around this time last year, I was the Queen. I could do and say whatever I wanted to whoever I wanted, and rarely would I face any consequences for it. When I did have to pay for my actions, the penalty was seldom anything significant enough to matter. In the eyes of the other students, this made me feared, untouchable, powerful—completely invincible—and they were right to see me as such.
At one point in time, if Rainbow Dash had asked me to meet her at the steps in front of school, it would have excited me. I wouldn’t have been afraid of her—she would have been afraid of me. No matter what she had planned, it would have ended in disaster for her. My dream from yesterday was a poignant reminder of that.
But a lot can change in one year.
Today, I was late getting to school. Not because I overslept, not due to anything on the way, and not because the time got away from me—it was a deliberate decision. Being late meant I wouldn’t have to meet Rainbow Dash before school started, and I wanted nothing more than to avoid her. Her message was just so frustratingly vague, and after our confrontation yesterday, her intentions were just as opaque. There were nearly endless ways our potential encounter could end badly, and I just didn’t have it in me to face her.
It wasn’t like I was worried about getting into another fight with her. If she didn’t hit me yesterday, she was probably never going to. What frightened me more than another altercation was what might happen if she humiliated me once again. Word about yesterday had already circulated around the school, and since I hadn’t fought back, it gave everyone an excuse to treat me even worse than normal today.
Only halfway through the school day, I was already experiencing the consequences from yesterday’s clash. The looks I garnered as I walked through the halls were even nastier than usual. Those who would usually cower in my presence were now sneering at me. Everyone’s negative attitude toward me was emboldened by my humiliation, and I had been shoved through the halls more times today than I could count. Yesterday proved I was a shadow of my former self, and now, everyone knew just how weak I truly was.
The school staff seemed to care just as much about how I was being treated as they did before. In my second period class, someone kept repeatedly tossing crumpled paper at my head. At first, I tried to ignore it, hoping it would stop if I didn’t acknowledge it. But it just kept coming, and it was taking more and more effort not to retaliate.
Of course, when I finally got fed up with it and snapped at them for it, I was the one who ended up in trouble. The teacher forced me to sit outside the classroom for the rest of the period despite not having done anything wrong. That’s when it became evident that, somehow, splitting my head open was far from the worst thing Dash had done to me yesterday.
Now, I was sitting in the last class before lunch, staring at the teacher, her voice sounding like white noise. On the outside, I probably looked like I was blanking out. Internally, my mind was racing at a mile a minute, and I had long given up on trying to slow it down. Time was running out. In less than an hour, my chances of evading Rainbow Dash would become very slim.
Sure, I could avoid the cafeteria entirely, but she’d probably just go looking for me. If not her, then the rest of the girls would. There were a few places around the school I could hide until lunch was over, but what about when the day ended? Would they be looking for me before I left, or would they give up until tomorrow? And when tomorrow inevitably came, would we just repeat this?
That wasn’t the only thing I was worried about, either. Perhaps Fluttershy sounded optimistic about discussing what happened with the girls, but I hardly felt like I could trust her all that much either. For days, I kept asking myself why she was being so nice to me. I just couldn’t accept that she was only acting that way out of the kindness of her heart.
No, there just had to be some kind of ulterior motive. While anxiously agonizing all last night about the day to come, I finally came up with an answer. Unfortunately, it was just as hard to stomach as it was to disagree with.
Fluttershy wasn’t nice to me because she liked me. It was for insurance.
When I realized that, I wanted to be angry—as upset with her as I was with Dash—but how could I be? Was it really fair to blame her for that? Considering our history, why would someone in her position be willing to mend the bridge between us for any other reason? It was the only conclusion that made sense.
Outside of the last couple of days, I hadn’t done much to atone for all the things I’d done to her, or any of them for that matter. Fluttershy had low expectations of me—probably just as low as Dash’s. Her hope was that if she was nice enough to me, I would go easier on her when I inevitably relapsed. There was no way she could have had any confidence in me, and if she did, it couldn’t have been much more than Rainbow Dash had. The only difference was in how they showed it.
After spending all last night going over every scenario in my head, I couldn’t help but feel like there was no hope. Even with Fluttershy in my corner, she was doing it out of fear, and there was no way the rest of them were going to side with her. They were going to give up on me, and I was going to be alone yet again. No matter what I did, no matter how hard I tried, I would never fit in with them.
And, well, if that was the case, what did it matter? We’d given this whole friendship thing a shot, and it didn’t pan out. That’s how I expected things to go from the very beginning, and I couldn’t have been alone in that. All of us had to know this was unavoidable. Once we had this discussion, they could stop wasting their time with me, and I could stop pretending I wanted their friendship. A win-win for everyone involved.
So then, why was I prolonging the inevitable? Why was I afraid to face them? Why did the idea of them giving up on me make me choke up? If they were never really my friends, what was I losing by deciding to mutually call it quits with all of them? Why was I being so stupid about this? There was nothing to be afraid of. It’s not like I had something to lose in the end.
Except I did. Before now, I could easily make myself believe I didn’t want friends. I’d never known what it was like to have someone who cared about me for who I was. For a long time, I had convinced myself that that’s how I wanted to be—I was happier that way.
Sometime after the Formal, something shifted inside of me. As much as I hated to admit it, I wasn’t just pretending to be their friend anymore. Even if our relationship was tenuous and awkward, it was still something I’d never had before. They might be all I had, but that was still something.
But just as I had done many times in the past, I sabotaged myself. And for the first time I could remember, I was afraid to pay the price. Evading the girls wasn’t going to stop the inevitable from happening, but perhaps being saddled with anxiety while I avoided them was a punishment I deserved.
In my perpetual mood spiral, I couldn’t help but feel a mirthless amusement at that thought. All this self-pitying felt so pointless and stupid. All my internal self-flagellation only made me feel worse about myself, and those feelings would in turn increase the self-flagellation. I’d certainly learn my lesson eventually.
Over the last few months, I’d learned to stop asking myself if things could get any worse. Every time I did, something else would inevitably go wrong. Life had taught me on numerous occasions that the bottom was never the lowest I could go. As if to provide a perfect example of this, the intercom crackled to life, interrupting the lecture I’d been paying no attention to.
“Sunset Shimmer, please report to the main office,” Principal Celestia announced from the speaker above.
Hearing my name in that voice always made my blood run cold, but this time I felt a flash freeze in my veins. Immediately, every set of eyes in the room fell onto me. Slowly turning my head, I scanned the faces of all my classmates. Some of them stared at me deadpanned, others glared, but the most common expression I saw was a smirk.
“You know she’s getting expelled,” one of the students remarked from the opposite side of the classroom. Naturally, this made everyone in the class giggle at my expense. I tried my best to hide my reaction, but I couldn’t help but flinch. Ms. Cheerilee reined the students back in, but by the time they settled down, I had already made myself scarce.
Where I had initially walked quickly to exit the class, I took my time on the way to the front office. The most reasonable yet quietest part of my mind kept telling me I didn’t have much to worry about, but it did little to calm my nerves. Vice Principal Luna said she would talk to Principal Celestia, but she had also said she would be the one to follow up with me.
It was the fact that the principal herself wished to speak with me that filled me with dread. Even if it was for a good reason, speaking with her was always a nerve wracking experience for me. No matter how many times I reminded myself she wasn’t the Celestia I knew, it did little to alleviate the pressure.
It was impossible to have a conversation with her without old wounds reopening. Even if their faces were different, their voices were exactly the same, and that was more than enough to put me on edge. Any time we were in the same room, my memories would loom over me and make every interaction between us stressful. Thankfully, in all of our previous encounters, she never seemed to notice. I couldn’t imagine trying to explain to her why I was acting the way I was.
For as slow as I walked, it wasn’t long before I was facing the door to her office. We weren’t even face to face yet, and already I was fighting a losing battle against my anxiety. There was no turning back now, though. Closing my eyes, I took in a deep breath and exhaled. Once it was out, I opened my eyes and knocked on the door.
The answer came almost instantly. “Come in.”
Turning the handle, I slowly opened the door, the hinges quietly creaking as I pushed it open. The room beyond the door was brightly lit—a stark contrast to the low lighting in Ms. Luna’s office. In the center of the room was Principal Celestia’s desk. There was one empty chair in front of it, and one occupied by her behind it.
“Have a seat, Ms. Shimmer.”
With a quiet gulp, I closed the door behind me and made my way over to the seat. Before the Formal, Ms. Celestia was a lot more cordial. That was when she only knew me as the well-behaved star student of CHS. Now, she was always terse, and it wasn’t hard to understand why. Her tone always reminded me of the day I ended up in this world. That made it even more of a struggle to maintain my composure in front of her.
Seconds passed like minutes as we just stared at one another. The only sounds that could be heard were the clock on the wall, and the faintly buzzing fluorescent lights above. Even if the brightness reflecting off of her reading glasses obscured her eyes, mine still nervously avoided her gaze.
Mercifully, she finally broke the silence. “How are you feeling this morning?” she asked.
“Just fine,” I replied shortly. “Thanks.”
“That’s good to hear.” Ms. Celestia looked down as she shuffled some papers around on her desk. “Do you know why I’ve called you here?”
My lips felt dry as I began to mouth my answer. “Not really, no,” I admitted.
As she looked up from her desk, her expression slightly softened. “You’re not in any trouble,” she assured, “I just want to talk about a few things with you.”
When she didn’t continue, I tried to say something, but could only nod in response. An uncomfortable silence fell over the room once again.
“After you met with Ms. Luna, she and I had a discussion. Part of it was about what happened between you and Rainbow Dash, but most of it was about the difficulties you expressed having.”
It was hard to get a read on how she felt as a result of that talk. Even if she said I wasn’t in any trouble, this was the same disapprovingly deadpan tone Princess Celestia would use on me. The continued absence of any sympathy from her led me to assume the worst. Still, I continued to anxiously nod along.
Ms. Celestia pulled off her glasses, resting her elbows on the desk and clasping her hands together. “I agree with her decision not to discipline you for yesterday, but I’m still not very happy with what I’ve heard. If not for that, I might have been inclined to relieve you of your punishment today.”
Hearing that drained nearly all the life out of my body. It’s exactly what I expected, but that didn’t take away from how awful it felt to hear it confirmed.
“However, considering you’ve stayed out of trouble since the Formal, you’ve kept your grades up, and you haven’t missed a payment so far, I believe you’ve earned a chance to prove yourself.”
That made me perk back up almost immediately.
“As of today, you can consider your punishment suspended,” she stated. “That doesn’t mean it’s gone. Think of it like probation.”
My face twisted into a confused frown. “I... don’t know what that means.”
Principal Celestia looked perplexed momentarily, as if it was weird I didn’t understand what she meant. “If you can continue to both stay out of trouble and keep your grades up, I will fully lift your punishment after one month. If you cause any incident between now and then, your punishment will be reinstated and will stay in effect until the damages are fully paid for. Do we have an agreement?”
The excitement that suddenly filled me was watered down by an equal amount of anxiety. This was too good to be true; it couldn’t be real. Sitting perfectly still, I waited for everything around me to melt into a nightmare.
Even if this was reality, could I really last a whole month? Especially considering how the other students had been treating me today. I would have to go an entire month without reacting to people who were now antagonizing me more than ever before. That sounded nearly impossible. Was it even worth taking her up on that offer?
As much as I wanted to nod and say yes, my body was almost completely unresponsive while my brain continued to process everything.
“Sunset?” Celestia prodded. “Are you okay?”
“I’m–”
That was the only sound that could escape me. What should I even say? Sorry, this is too good to be true and I’m just expecting this to be a nightmare? I would either sound like I was joking or insane.
Principal Celestia raised an eyebrow at my continued lack of a proper response. Finally, my brain was able to cobble together something coherent.
“Sorry, I just didn’t get much sleep last night,” I answered. Truthfully, I hadn’t slept at all since the day before.
“Ms. Luna mentioned you said you’ve been having issues with sleep,” she replied. “And she certainly wasn’t exaggerating, either. You look exhausted.”
For the first time since we’d started talking, she didn’t sound so emotionless. It was subtle, but there was that unmistakable warmth.
“Yeah, I only get a few hours most nights, and on the nights I get more, it’s not particularly restful.” I ended my sentence with a nervous half-smile.
Ms. Celestia responded to my expression with a frown. “I’m sorry to hear. I hope you understand I never intended for your punishment to be cruel. Had I known your job was interfering with how much sleep you were getting, I would have worked to come up with a compromise sooner.”
“It’s not that,” I said, shaking my head. “My job closes pretty early, and I can only work certain hours on weekdays anyway. It’s just…”
As my voice tapered off, my eyes fixed on the floor. Normally, I’d have no trouble trying to deflect something like this, but the truth was desperately trying to push itself out of me. The moment I heard a shred of sincerity in her voice, I felt uncomfortably vulnerable. It made me want to tell her everything. I wanted to tell her that every time I tried to sleep, my mind would inevitably be invaded by nightmares. It’s just that the moment I admitted that, I knew I would break down and cry.
Maybe I should have let myself do that, though. Maybe she would understand. Maybe she would hug me, and I could relax into her arms while I cried into her shoulder. Maybe her voice would be just as warm as her embrace as she told me everything would be okay. And maybe, if only for a moment, I wouldn’t feel so cold and alone.
But as our eyes met again, my hopes were crushed under the immense weight of reality. Her comfort was meaningless because she wasn’t who I really wanted comfort from. Nothing she could do for me would change the fact that she wasn’t the Princess. She was someone else entirely. The depth to which she could understand me was shallow compared to who I associated her with. Princess Celestia and I may have parted on bad terms, we had years of history behind that. She’d show more understanding to me than her counterpart—someone who only knew me as a deceptive bully and maniacal demon.
“I still feel guilty about everything, that’s all.” As those words passed through my lips, my entire being felt hollow. “But yes, we have an agreement.”
Ms. Celestia offered a comforting smile. “I understand you feel guilty, but you’ve done very well so far, Sunset. You’ve far exceeded my expectations. Don’t let anyone take that away from you.”
“Thank you, Principal Celestia.” I replied, a wan smile spreading across my face. Her compliment was enough to alleviate a slight amount of my inner turmoil. “I’ll be sure to stay out of trouble.”
“That’s what I like to hear,” she said, her serene smile widening.
“Before you leave, there’s one more matter I’d like to discuss,” she said.
“What is it?” I asked.
“Ms. Luna tells me other students have been causing you trouble. I understand why they might be apprehensive about you, but that does nothing to excuse their behavior. You may be on probation, but if someone provokes you, you come to one of us. I know it may not seem like it, but we’re on your side, and we want to see you continue to do well.” She paused, looking up at the clock. “And unless you have any questions, you’re free to go to lunch.”
My empty smile grew just a little wider. “Thanks, prince–” I covered my mouth and coughed lightly, “–Principal Celestia. I won’t let you down again.”
She nodded before putting her glasses back on, looking down at the many papers strewn about her desk. My legs felt weak as I stood up and made my way to the exit. Internally, I was cursing at myself for nearly slipping up, but thankfully she either didn’t notice or care.
As I shut the door to Principal Celestia’s office, I felt strangely ambivalent. I should have been happy. After all, my punishment was suspended, there was a chance it could be done away with entirely, and I’d get to keep more of my paycheck this week. That meant I could go back to working less hours, that meant I didn’t have to waste so much time at a place I hated, that meant I finally had time to myself. There was no reason not to be ecstatic.
Yet the joy from that was far from enough to fill the void left inside of me after our talk. It was the same feeling I got every time I had to speak with Principal Celestia, only it was all-consuming this time.
Ironically, it was the more positive interactions that always made me feel worse. Even when we were on better terms, that emotionless tone she carried was a given. I was used to that. It stopped bothering me a long time ago.
It was hearing that caring tone of hers that hurt the most. It was so rare, but every time I heard it, it provided me with a familiar comfort I’d longed for since I ran away from home. It made me feel wanted, like I was special. Like, maybe she saw me as something more than just her student.
But the truth would always leave cold, bitter emptiness in its wake. Any positivity I felt was temporary, and it only came to me because of who she reminded me of—not who she was. Praise meant nothing coming from her, because I was no more special to her than anyone else in this school. I wasn’t even her student, I was just a student, and I would never be anything more to her than that.
At one point in time, these thoughts would be enough to make me an emotional wreck. But over the past few years, I’d learned how to compartmentalize them. Of course, that didn’t mean those feelings went away. I was trading stability now for an even more explosive meltdown later. Those emotions would find a way out of me on their own, but the hope was that I’d be in a better spot to let them out when the time came.
Trying to push those thoughts out of my head, I absentmindedly continued down the hallway. Once I was halfway to the cafeteria, I stopped dead in my tracks. If I hadn’t realized what I was doing, I’d have run right into Dash and the others. After meeting with the principal, I felt even less prepared to deal with something like that. Breathing a sigh of relief, I pivoted, taking a different direction as I thought about where to hide.
My mind jumped to the idea of the roof first. If the maintenance key in my locker was still good, I could hang around up there, and no one would find me. It didn’t take long for me to talk myself out of that, though. If I got caught, that would assuredly violate my probation. Then I thought about the faculty parking lot, but I’d rather not deal with any teachers asking me why I’m there.
Whatever the case, being in the mostly empty hallway was the worst place for me. I wasn’t exactly hard to spot in a crowd, so being out in the open was exceptionally dangerous.
“Hey!” A voice erupted from behind.
Every muscle in my body tensed up at once. Hearing that voice gave me an intense sensation of déjà vu. Their tone, the location, how far away they sounded—it was like being thrown back in time. I didn’t have to look to see who it was, but I slowly swiveled around in place anyway. My stomach lurched as our gazes met.
“I’ve been looking for you all day!” Rainbow Dash exclaimed. “Where were you this morning?”
My mouth tried to settle on a syllable, but my voice couldn’t provide a sound for any of them. As my heart began to race, my mind followed suit. I began running through a mental map of the school, trying to settle on some place to run and hide. Without even thinking about where I was headed, I took off down one of the hallways.
“Hey, wait!” she cried out. “Come back!”
I didn’t have to turn around to know she was chasing after me. Her footsteps were just as loud as mine as we launched our chase through the mostly empty halls of CHS. Sometimes, I would look like I was running down one hallway just to dart down another. Without turning around, there was no way to tell if it was an effective strategy.
“Wait! Stop!”
There was a smart quip in response to that somewhere in the depths of my mind, but I just kept running. My throat felt like it was swelling as the chase continued. My body was burning through energy it didn’t have. All I had to keep me going were fumes and the adrenaline running through me. It was a miracle I was able to outrun the fastest person in the entire school, but I didn’t want to question it.
But as that thought entered my head, doubt began to set in. I hadn’t looked back since we started running, but her footsteps always sounded the same distance away. What if she was slowly gaining on me? Unable to quiet my curiosity, I turned my neck just to see she was trailing right behind. She made it look so effortless—as if she could catch up to me at any time without breaking a sweat.
“Go away!” I screamed. “Leave me alone!”
Turning my head forward, we both made a sharp turn down a corridor. After our sudden change of direction, I spotted a couple of students chatting in the hallway. Trying to escape from Rainbow Dash had me so panicked that I didn’t even register who the two were, but I had an awful idea, and no time to parse whether or not I should act on it. Dash was mere steps away from me when I made my decision.
“I just want to–”
That was all she managed to say before I acted. Without thinking, I reached out and grabbed one of the students, shoving them directly into Rainbow Dash to the best of my ability. I was moving so frantically, I didn’t even look to see if I made my mark. After the deed was done, I started running again.
The treads of my shoes squeaked against the floor as I hung another sharp turn. Without even realizing it, I’d run to a very familiar place—the bathroom I usually hid in during lunch. As I made it to the back wall of the room, I finally stopped. Immediately, I began to pant, wiping away the sweat from my brow as I tried to catch my breath. Hopefully, my diversion was enough to get Rainbow Dash off of my tail.
Of course, I could never be so lucky.
“What’s your fucking problem?” Dash barked upon entering the bathroom. “Why are you acting like this?”
My heart plummeted. Knowing I was cornered, I let out a sharp exhale. Either throwing someone into her did nothing to slow her down, or I missed her entirely. Now, not only did I have to face Dash, but whoever I just pushed would undoubtedly rat me out. That was just awesome. What’s another log in the fireplace when the whole house is burning?
For a few seconds, my only response was labored breathing. I couldn’t even look at her. Not only because I was bent over, holding myself up with my hands on my knees, but because I felt like if I did, I’d throw up.
“Please,” I sputtered, “just leave me alone.”
“Why? I’m just–”
“I know!” I snapped, raising my voice. “I already know, okay? I get it!”
Rainbow Dash looked flummoxed as she cocked her head back. “What are you–”
“I’m sorry, okay? Is that what you want? Will that make you go away?” I interrupted, still trying to fully catch my breath. Finally, I looked up at her, fear masked by my scowl. “I’ve already fucked things up for myself enough today. I know you’re giving up on me—all of you are. I’ve already figured that out. We don’t have to do this. Just leave me alone and we can both start moving on.”
Dash paused and took a step back. “Hold up, that’s not–”
Her attempts to placate me fell on deaf ears as I started to shout, my voice cracking as my volume increased. “Okay, fine! I’m sorry about yesterday! I’m sorry for trying to make you fight me last year! I’m sorry for making you and Fluttershy fight! I’m sorry for wasting yours and everyone else’s time! There! Now will you please fuck off and–”
“Holy shit, shut up already!” Dash exclaimed. “Would you just stop whining for five whole seconds and let me say something?” Rainbow Dash’s tone gave the impression she was angry, but the exasperated smile on her face left me perplexed as to how she actually felt.
As my breath finally caught up with me, the room was tense and silent. Then, after staring at each other for a brief eternity, Dash started to chuckle. Then, her chuckle turned into a full on chortle.
My eyes narrowed as I watched her fall into a laughing fit. How was I supposed to react to this? Should I have been more pissed off or confused? What part of this could possibly be funny?
Maybe I wasn’t in any position to be angry, but that didn’t stop me from getting heated because of her reaction. My fists started shaking as my fingernails dug into my palms.
“What?” I finally asked. “What’s so funny?”
“This whole thing,” she answered, her amusement slowly dying down.
Angling my head slightly to the side, I kept squinting at her. “You think this is funny?”
“Yeah, it is,” she bluntly stated.
The candor of her response left me without a reply of my own. Once she finally regained her composure, she leaned back against the bathroom wall. Her mood seemed far less jovial than it was moments ago as she began to speak.
“Look, I’ve been meaning to talk to you since this morning. Not because anyone’s giving up on you or anything, though. I have no idea where you got that idea from. It’s because, well…” Her voice tapered off as she looked around the room.
Had it not been for the past hour of frenzy I’d been through, I might have been more patient.
“Then what is it?” I asked.
Dash sighed as she looked at me again. “I’m sorry, alright.”
My eyes went wide, then immediately narrowed again. “You’re… sorry?”
“What? Is it that hard to believe? Yes, I’m actually sorry.” She let a sharp exhale out of her nose.
I cocked my head back at the sudden aggression in her voice. “No! That’s not– I mean–” Stopping myself mid-sentence, I closed my eyes, taking in and letting out a deep breath. “Why?”
That must have been the wrong question to ask. Dash seemed even more offended than before. “Come on! Seriously? Can’t you just accept my apology?”
“It’s not that I don’t believe you!” I exclaimed. “I just really don’t understand why you’re sorry.”
“You and me both,” she muttered with a quiet chuckle.
Electing to ignore her snide remark, I explained my previous statement. “It was my fault things got so heated. If I had just left you alone instead of making a shitty comment like I did, none of that would have happened. I shouldn’t have brought up what happened last year, and I shouldn’t have tried to bait you into hitting me. So, if anything, I should be saying sorry to you.” Glancing at the floor for a moment, I looked back up at her. “So… I’m sorry.”
Dash’s eyes were wide for a few seconds until her face folded into a frown.
“I haven’t been giving you a fair chance,” she began. “We’re supposed to be friends, and every time you’ve tried to act like one, I’ve been a jerk to you. Especially yesterday. That wasn’t cool.”
She paused as she looked up at the ceiling. “I’m gonna be honest with you,” she continued, “I still don’t know if I like you, and I sure as shit still don’t trust you.”
What a shocking revelation.
“That’s not an excuse, though. The girls have been trying to give you a chance, and I’ve been such an asshole that it’s made it harder for them to do that. So, I’m sorry for that too.”
For the second time that day, I didn’t want to believe my ears. Once again, this was too good to be true. There was no way I was actually hearing any of this right. Something was wrong. If this wasn’t another nightmare, then she had an ulterior motive for doing this. After a few moments of processing, I finally came up with an answer.
“Fluttershy put you up to this, didn’t she?” I asked impulsively.
Dash tilted her head back down, immediately glowering at me as our gazes met again. “What? Come on! Why can’t you just–” She blinked, calming herself down from her momentary bout of frustration with a deep breath.
“No, I swear she didn’t,” she exhaled, trying her best to hide her irritation. “But... she is part of why I’m doing this.”
I gave her a half-lidded glare. “That doesn’t really help your case, you know.”
Dash groaned. “Fine! She’s the biggest reason I’m doing this!” she conceded. “Fluttershy is mad at me about yesterday and won’t talk to me, and I’m apologizing because I’m hoping this will make her get over it. But I swear she’s not the only reason I’m doing this.”
That didn’t make me any more confident about how genuine she was, but I paused before I responded. Even if her apology wasn’t totally sincere, she was at least honest about her motivation. And if she was actually willing to take a chance on me after what we’d been through, it was only fair I took a chance on her as well.
Before I had a chance to answer, Dash started to speak again.
“Fluttershy’s been my best friend for a long time, and she’s super important to me. I’ve been such an asshole to you because of how you used to treat us, but especially how you treated her. If I’ve been worse than normal, it’s because seeing you around her lately just makes me nervous. I don’t think I gotta explain why that is either.
“But Fluttershy sees something in you that I guess I can’t see. I don’t know what it is, but if it’s important to her, then it’s important to me, too. So why don’t we just try to start over? If you won’t do it for me, at least do it for her. We both owe her that much.”
Looking around the room, I pondered my response. Part of me wanted to argue that all Fluttershy saw in me was an opportunity to protect herself from my eventual wrath. But this conversation had gone on long enough, and I didn’t have the energy to keep at this for much longer.
The important part was that she and the rest of the girls weren’t giving up on me. Regardless of their motivations, if I accepted her truce, I wouldn’t have to be alone. That was all the reason I needed.
“Fine,” I surrendered. “Let’s start over.”
“Alright!” Dash exclaimed. The intensity of her reaction took me by surprise. “I promise you’re not gonna regret this.”
“Yes, that’s all well and good,” an annoyed voice spoke from around the corner of the bathroom’s entrance. “Now, would one of you be kind enough to explain to me why I had to get involved in your little chase?”
Long, luscious locks of purple entered the room, revealing the source of the irritated voice. That’s when I realized just who it was that I had tried to throw into Dash during our pursuit.
“Don’t look at me,” Rainbow Dash replied, pointing her thumb in my direction. “It was her.”
I smiled sheepishly at Rarity before looking off to the side. “Y-Yeah, that was me,” I stammered. “Sorry about that.”
To my surprise, she didn’t seem all that upset. In fact, when I looked back at her she was smiling sweetly. “It’s quite alright, darling. I’m not injured or anything. Luckily, there was someone nearby to catch me.”
“Good to hear,” I responded nervously.
“By the way, your aim sucks,” Dash remarked with a smirk. “You didn’t push her anywhere near me.”
I gave her a confused look in response. “If I didn’t push her toward you, then who caught Rarity?”
“Are y’all still hangin’ around in here?” As all of our heads turned toward the bathroom entrance, Applejack revealed herself. “I ain’t gonna wait much longer to go to lunch if y’all don’t quit makin’ out in the damn bathroom.”
“Hey!” Dash snapped, playfully punching AJ on the shoulder. “Fuck off with that.”
Rarity turned back to me, still grinning. “Does that answer your question?”
“I guess so,” I said, punctuated with an awkward chuckle.
“Come along, then,” Rarity said as she made her way to the exit. “I’m sure Pinkie and Fluttershy are starting to worry about us.”
After that, we all made our departure from the secluded bathroom. Making our way through the halls, the three of them stood closer together ahead of me. As they talked amongst themselves, I couldn’t help but smile. Sure, I might have been left out of the conversation, but at that moment, I was fine with that.
For the first time since waking up yesterday, I felt hope. They weren’t giving up on me. They were still my friends. They wanted things to work out just as much as I wanted them to.
It was still hard to believe anything that had happened today. My punishment being lifted and Rainbow Dash apologizing to me were two of the last things I ever expected to happen—much less on the same day. There was a lingering feeling in the pit of my stomach that at any moment, all of this would melt away into the realm of nightmares once again.
But She was never that subtle. If this were going to become a nightmare, it would have happened by now. This was reality, and maybe it wasn’t so bad. Maybe, just maybe, things would get better.
Only time would tell.