//------------------------------// // Chapter 6 - Sad Feelings and Unusual Memories. // Story: Chrysalis' unexpected child // by coto616 //------------------------------// --------------------------------- Chapter 6 - Sad Feelings and Unusual Memories. --------------------------------- Chrysalis was lying on a long wooden sofa with red cushions, around her were a couple of bookcases with books that she didn't know existed, big vases with different plants made the place feel very natural and fresh, on a wall, there were frames with pictures of happy changelings with what seemed to be their relatives, On the ceiling was gently moving one of those fans with light that everyone knows but no one knows what they are called, there was also a desk with some books, many leaves and one of those decorative toys of a drinking bird but with the head of Princess Luna, on a small bench with a cushion was sitting Dr. Red Bug with a smile. The queen had between her hooves Mr. cuddles, a large octopus of purple color, had a huge head for the proportions of its short tentacles, a pair of large eyes, and a small mouth and slightly cheerful, was soft as hugging a cloud and not forgetting that it is a hypoallergenic material, but what was most striking is that it had only seven tentacles instead of eight and where it should have its eighth tentacle had two white patches crossed with threads of various colors. "Queen Chrysalis before we start I want to remind you that here you are in control and you can leave whenever you want to do so, you don't have to talk about anything if you don't want to but I am here to listen to you and I promise you that nothing you say will leave this office, okay?." Chrysalis nodded her head without letting go of Mr. Cuddles. "Okay." The doctor adjusted her glasses and cleared her throat. "This month has been very intense for everyone, lots of changes in the hives and in our way of life, everyone looks much happier than ever and I'm slowly running out of work." Commented the doctor with a chuckle. "But as long as they are fine, it doesn't bother me, you told me something similar this morning, remember?". The queen said nothing and just hugged Mr. Cuddles tighter. "As I've had more free time I've tried many new things and among all the things I've liked the most has been knitting wool sweaters, they are horrible and always fit me with the shortest sleeves." "Then why do you keep making them?" Asked the queen softly. "Because I like making them, it makes me happy to see it when I finish them and they always get a laugh out of me or my friends how ugly they are, then I just take them apart and start a new one again, but little by little I've gotten better and I hope someday to make a sweater that someone can wear." "I can't do that, I don't like things to look bad." "Like what happened the other day in the pottery class?" The doctor asked. "Would you like to talk about that?" Chrysalis ducked her head a little and squeezed Mr. cuddles tighter. "I understand, let's talk about something else, from what I see on your face you have not slept well and eaten little these days." "The work of a queen is stressful and sometimes I would like to be left alone to rest." "Completely understandable." The doctor began to write something in her notebook. "I have also heard that you have tried several new workshops but none of them have appealed to you, may I ask why?" "None of them have been of interest to me." Sighed the queen in Mr. Cuddle's gentle embrace. "That makes sense, you have lived a lot and probably have already seen or done many new things we are trying, right?" The queen nodded her head without saying anything else, the doctor looked at the queen and knew she wanted to talk about something but didn't have the strength to start the conversation, she had to find another approach to get the queen to open up so she could talk about her problems. "Do you think all this has to do with the invasion of Canterlot and you want to make it up to us for what happened?" The doctor had read what there was about the queen's medical history and this was the first time there was any record of such a marked change in mood and personality, so she knew Canterlot had something to do with it. "It was a difficult process for everyone, they did well, it was my fault we failed, it was... difficult and somewhat painful, but we will get through it after all wounds heal with time... well... most of them." The queen spoke softly sighing between words, but what the queen said and the way she said it gave her a good hoof to open up to a conversation, the doctor just needed the precise focus and seeing Mr. cuddles she thought she had in front of her just what she needed. "You know, Mr. cuddles had a hard life when he was little, too." "Really?" Asked the queen raising her head. "Ohh yes, when he was a little octopus he suffered an accident and that's why he's missing one of his tentacles." The doctor pointed her hoof at the stuffed animal right where the patch was. "It wasn't easy for him, but he pulled through and made it through, he is now one of the best assistants and we always look out for each other. The queen turned Mr. cuddles to face him and gently began to stroke him in a way to comfort the octopus. "Some ponies are as lucky as Mr. cuddles are, to have someone to take care of him when they can't take care of themselves, others are not that lucky, some little ones are not." The queen hugged Mr. cuddles tightly again with no intention of letting go and making him feel safe. "And why don't you better tell him, he likes to listen to others and he is the best at keeping secrets, besides I know he will feel better if you do and he would also like to be your friend and you can help me take care of him from time to time." The queen looked peacefully at Mr. cuddles as she hugged him and stroked his huge round head, he was very soft and with an expressive face willing to listen to the queen patiently as long as she wanted, yes... the queen thought Mr. cuddles would be a very good friend. "He really does need help sometimes doesn't he?" Asked the queen to which the doctor nodded gently. "Yes... I also met someone like that a few days ago, he was small and very scared, really a useless little guy with a big heart that he couldn't even see in front of him..." The queen was lost talking as she watched and petted Mr. cuddles. "And this changeling lives in this hive?." "He lives with his mother in Cant... I mean, no, he lives far, far away from here, I don't think you know him Mr. cuddles." The doctor found it curious that the queen was referring to someone living in a busy city like Canterlot, she knew that changelings were forbidden to spend much time spying in a large city let alone live in one, by saying that he lived with his mother in the capital of Equestria, she deduced that it was someone else, but she didn't want to interrupt the queen as she spoke, she had found it hard to get her to start talking about her problems and she wasn't going to stop her now. Chrysalis felt very confident with Mr. cuddles and began to tell him her story of a few days ago, what she did and saw, where she went, and who she met, never worrying that her story involved a little blind unicorn that she thought she would use and ended up forming a bond with him, also what had happened to him and what his mother was like. The queen talked for a long time, sometimes pausing to wipe her eyes or sigh in the soft embrace of her pulpy new friend, the doctor asked the occasional question, but to the queen's ears, Mr. cuddles could ask her all the questions he wanted. The doctor was a little surprised that the queen was so open and accessible to tell her problems, in her experience patients never speak so openly until the third or so session, the only thing she thought was that the queen desperately wanted to talk to someone and didn't know how to ask, and that apparently that little foal left a very deep impression on the queen. The changeling knew that the queen was not merciless, much less cruel, she was strict and somewhat harsh with her subjects, but she always cared about them, she loved every one of them differently and even if she tried not to show it, everyone knew when she was worried about one of her changelings if they were sick or very hurt, so knowing that a mare showed so little interest for her son, moved the foundations in the bottom of the monarch's heart. "And that's the story Mr. cuddles, I hope I haven't bored you." Said the queen. "Mr. Cuddle's job is to be present and listen to stories, and I now understand why your personality has changed so abruptly." The doctor replied. "What do you mean?" The queen asked, looking up. "You unwittingly reflected the love you feel for us in that little being you found in the forest and when you left that foal and saw that his mother did not reciprocate that love in the same way for her son, it caused your heart to fracture and now you are trying to fill that guilt by trying to make our lives better." "It's a mother's job to take care of her children." "And you think she doesn't take care of her child?" "I don't think so, I know." Replied the queen. "And how can you be so sure." "Because a mother without thinking about it must care for them, it's something that comes with the job, it's something her heart understands when she sees them." The annoyed queen tapped her chest where her heart was. "So that's why you always go to maternity to see that the little ones are well and nothing happens to them?" "Yes... I mean no... they're fine, I know they're fine, it's my job to make sure of it, it's a mother's job to take care of her child, not to abandon her foal in the woods to its fate." "That little guy left a very strong impression on you." "He was just a unicorn, an innocent, cheerful dam who deserves so much more and now he lives with a mother who doesn't love him." "Leaving that colt with her broke your heart, didn't it?" "Look, he was a simple unicorn, and I've accepted it." Contented the queen shouted angrily. "I'm the reason he's suffering now, it's all my fault." Dr. Red Bug silently and calmly looked at the queen as she slowly turned her anger into sadness, as her hooves began to shiver and her breathing quickened along with her watery eyes. "What do you mean?" The doctor asked softly. "I should have done something...no...I shouldn't have left him with her." The queen replied in a broken voice. "What could you have done differently than you did?" Red Bug asked. "I don't know..." The queen was trying to hold back tears in a battle she was slowly losing. "I had to do something...I should have offered him something better...he deserves better.... no one deserves a mother like that." The queen had almost lost the battle and found herself sobbing. "Even when we do something with the best intentions and we do everything right, sometimes bad things happen to good ponies who don't deserve it, things that are out of our control, and even if it pains us to accept it, sometimes we feel..." "Powerless." Said the queen already crying in a very low voice. Chrysalis stood up in tears throwing Mr. cuddles to the ground unconcerned. "But I don't want to be like that... I should... She shouldn't... I had to help him somehow... he needed." "How?" "I don't know... I don't know... I just... I... I... I..." Chrysalis murmured with tears in her eyes. "Doctor...I need help, I don't want to feel like this...please...help me...I...I need." "Admitting that... it's a start we can work with..."