//------------------------------// // Chapter 15: To Yearn for More // Story: Fallout: Equestria - Shadow of the Day // by Kaciekk //------------------------------// SwiftHaze awoke to the chattering of Zebra foals out on the streets. Ugh, it’s too early for this! Why are they up? Blinking, she opened her eyes to take in the dull light filtering through the room. Somehow, she wasn’t used to it being light when she awoke. For so long she had risen in the dark confinement of her Stable room. Haze pushed herself up from her sleeping position on her belly. She brought her foreleg under her muzzle and looked at her PipBuck. 9:43 AM. It wasn’t as early as she had suspected. Had she really slept for that long? She forced herself to get up so she could use the bathroom. Good Celestia, everything still ached! As she passed by downstairs, OrchidRays flagged her down with a wave. “Mrs. Ayza is making breakfast. You wanna eat with us?” “Yeah, that would be great,” Haze replied. Everyone was gathered in a circle, sitting on cushions on the floor. In the center of them as a short, circular platform, only a hoof high. It served as a table as Ayza began setting dishes down. She gave them each a plate of their own. “You eat on the floor?” Haze wondered quizzically. “I know you ponies may not be accustomed to it,” Ayza said. “No, I mean- it’s not wrong. I just find it interesting,” Haze clarified in case she had sounded offensive. Ayza sat on her own cushion. She began to rotate the platform around with a hoof, moving the dishes around so everyone could reach whatever they fancied. “Oh! It spins!” Ray marveled. The dish that stopped in front of Haze was a sort of bright purple fruit cut into halves. She took a few pieces and placed them on her plate. “What is this?” she questioned. “Mutfruit,” Ayza said. As Haze’s brow rose, she continued. “They grow plentiful in the wasteland. Perfectly edible.” There was a soft, slow click click from Haze’s PipBuck. They’re slightly irradiated,” Haze grimaced. “As is everything that grows in the wild,” Ayza told her. “That is the world we live in unfortunately. We have potions that can cleanse you of radiation.” The mutfruit was slightly bitter, but it wasn’t the worst thing Haze had tasted since she left the Stable. She was grateful to know that it was at least edible. “You’ve been very hospitable to us,” GleamingChance had brought up as they ate. “Thank you, we owe you.” “I am still contemplating that,” Ayza replied. “But I do insist you stay for another night so your feathered friend can heal.” “What?” Haze blurted out. “Why? I’m feeling better!” “Well enough to fly?” Ayza challenged. “Erm...” “That is what I thought,” the Zebra mare concluded and kept eating. “Ma, I wanted to ask you something,” Xoqan spoke next. Ayza gave her attention to her son as she enjoyed her meal. “I know I’m an adult and can decide things on my own... but I wanted to know what you think of me going with these ponies as they travel.” Ayza’s purple eyes widened. “They said they’re going to Phoenix city. That’s where Dad went. I want to look for him. I’d also like to practice my healing skills for real.” Suspense filled the air as Xoqan waited for his mother to respond. Instead, she turned to the three ponies. “If you can bring back my husband, that will be enough payment for my hospitality.” “So... Is it okay if I go?” Xoqan reiterated. “I do not like it, and it is dangerous, but I know I cannot keep you in this town forever. I understand you strive to learn, and I know you are strong and clever. I speak my own opinion, for you do control your own life,” Ayza explained, her words confusing Haze. “Thank you,” Xoqan responded with gratitude. He bowed his head, accepting her strange answer. It must have been Zebra logic. “But, what if we don’t find your husband?” Chance asked with uncertainty. Ayza considered this. “ I suppose your assistance in searching for him will be enough. Someone has to do it.” “I’d still feel bad without giving you some tangible payment,” Chance insisted. “I’d like to give you a couple dozen caps at least.” “Very well,” Ayza said. “But, after I make sure we have enough to buy supplies for the journey. We have to restock our supplies,” he reminded the girls. “I’ve got my own stash of medical supplies if that helps,” Xoqan offered. Chance nodded. “I’d still like to go out to the marketplace and purchase things.” “I can show you what I got and you can figure out what else you need,” Xoqan said. “Sounds good,” Chance agreed, his voice conveying relief. A bit after breakfast, Chance was preparing to depart for the marketplace. He had requested Ray to accompany him, pleasing the young mare. Begrudgingly, Haze watched them get ready. Of course she couldn’t go. Ayza firmly insisted that she stay in her room and rest. Haze took a few steps to approach Chance. They had barely spoken since the incident the day prior. “Are you still mad at me?” Haze pried. Chance looked at her with a straight face. “Yes.” Haze deflated a bit. “But that’s not going to stop me from continuing our mission. I’m allowed to be upset, but I won’t hold a grudge against you. I just want you to understand and learn from your mistakes.” Haze gave him a somber nod. At least he didn’t speak to her in a demeaning tone. Haze couldn’t understand how he could still hold his feelings of outrage with a pony, yet speak to them as if it didn’t bother him at all. He truly was mature and had control over his temper. Those were things from him that Haze could learn. She watched her two friends leave and then turned to amble to her room. As the morning slowly crawled on, SwiftHaze silently brooded in her room. Boredom seemed to be her worst enemy. She understood she needed to heal, but there was no sense in staying put if it could still while she was up and about, as long as she didn’t use it. With legs propped on the window sill, Haze placed her chin in them and watched the street below. An idea mischievously formed in her mind. She studied where her team’s wagon was parked right below the window. It wouldn’t hurt if I leave and come right back and Ayza never finds out, right? She proceeded to unlock the window and pull it open. She stuck half her body out and peered directly down at the wagon’s roof. With a quick hop, she landed on all four hooves. Once the wagon’s wavering stopped, she carefully jumped a second time to reach the solid street. She stood tall and proud of her small accomplishment. “Sneaking out?” “Ah!” Xoqan’s voice startled Haze as he came around the side of the house. He lifted his hoof to his mouth. “You’re not going to tell your mom, are you?” Haze whispered. Xoqan shook his head. “Thanks,” Haze breathed out. “I just wanna look around.” “I could show you around,” Xoqan offered. “Really? That would be awesome.” Probably a good idea to trust someone who knew these streets. Xoqan tilted his head away from his house. “C’mon, before Ma finds out.” Haze quickly scampered after the Zebra. Xoqan’s striped tail guided SwiftHaze through his hometown. Now they were following along the stream Haze had followed the day before. At least the water flowed freely in this part of the city. Up ahead, adjacent to the stream was a building made of marble. It had doorways and pillars surrounding it. Half of it seemed to be crumbling along the edge near the water. Marble stones piled in the ditch below. “This used to be a bathhouse,” Xoqan was saying. “But obviously we don’t use it no more. That’d be a waste of pure water, even if we have a water talisman. Not like it’s easy finding water out here in the first place.” Haze cocked her head. “How’d you guys get a water talisman?” She had remembered hearing of such an object in Stable 47. That was what provided the Stable with clean water. “Used to be an old Stable here,” Xoqan explained. “The Zebras here are descendants of those that came out of the Stable. All Zebra Stable I believe.” “Whoa, there’s a Stable here? Can you show me?” Haze asked eagerly. “Can’t. Don’t know where it is. I think the city officials hide it from the public because they don’t want us getting into it.” “Damn,” Haze mumbled and kept her pace. “Wait, why would they hide it from you?” “Don’t know. Maybe it has secrets, or is dangerous. Or they want to stop gangs from claiming it as territory,” Xoqan guessed. “Huh.” All valid reasons I suppose, Haze thought. A few moments passed where the two of them were silent. Then Xoqan let out, “Fuck. Speaking of gangs.” Way down the road were two Zebras standing together. Haze wasn’t certain but they appeared to be eyeing Xoqan. “C’mon. Let’s get out of here,” he said, taking a turn to the right onto a new path. Soon they approached a large, wide building with many windows. There was a fence encircling a yard that extended from the side. “This is the school,” Xoqan said. “We still use it. There’s probably foals in there now.” Most likely nowhere near the amount of students it had once held. Haze was glad that at least the city valued education for their youth. As Haze kept following Xoqan, she became very aware of all the Zebra eyes watching her. Was it because she was a pony? No, there were ponies who lived here. Because of her wings? Possibly. Haze nearly lost sight of Xoqan as she became fixated on the stares. She cantered forward to meet up with her guide. They were passing a crossroad when a voice shouted out from the left. “Xoqan, you cocksucker!” Both Haze and Xoqan stopped in their tracks. The latter quickly wiped his head to face the source of the strange, exotic voice. It had been one of the Zebras they had spotted earlier. They were galloping to intercept them, one other Zebra trailing. “What the fuck do you want?” Xoqan belted out. He gritted his teeth. “You think you can get away with what you did yesterday?” The opposing Zebra spat as he stepped into the intersection, as if it was a battleground. “I think I fucking can,” Xoqan sneered. “You need to get your asses off the ponies in this town. Harassing them isn’t going to get you anywhere, Mazi. If anything it will just fuck you over.” “With those weak ass ponies, ha, yeah right,” Mazi sniffed. He shot a dirty look at Haze. “You want a piece of me?” Haze taunted. “Ah, so she has a bark, huh?” Mazi teased. “No, he doesn’t. Keep out of this,” Xoqan shot at Haze. “And for you,” he looked to Mazi, “I know you don’t like me, I literally couldn’t care less. But you ain’t fucking with the ponies when they’ve done nothing to you.” “And how are you going to stop me? What that frilly ass magic of yours?” “Yeah.” Xoqan swiftly raised his forehoof up. Dark magic formed around Mazi’s neck, strangling him. Slowly, he rose into the air until his hooves dangled above the pavement. With a swipe of a hoof, Xoqan slammed him down onto the hard ground. Mazi shook in pain. The Zebra mare that was standing behind him was gaping. “Why the fuck would you do that?” “Because he just keeps asking for trouble. You want some too?” Xoqan jeered, his eyes squinting. The mare took a few steps back. “Yeah, that’s what I fucking thought.” “Let’s go,” he said to Haze and stomped off. Haze’s hooves got moving, but her eyes still watched Mazi struggle on the ground. Once they were a few blocks away, Haze approached Xoqan. “What did you do to him? Is he going to be okay?” “Nothing too bad. I’ve done worse. That was just a shove,” Xoqan assured. He sighed. “I don’t get why they keep coming back to me when they know they can’t win.” Haze struggled to understand the conflict. She was out of context, of course, but she suspected it had something to do with Xoqan being friends with ponies. I’ve done worse. Those words made Haze shudder. What had Xoqan done in the past? Ahead of them was a badly damaged building, the walls blackened from smoke. Haze pointed it out. “That used to be a library,” Xoqan informed her. “Got burned down, not too long ago actually.” “Why?” “It was full of Equestria text, mostly propaganda, anti-Zebra shit. Not all of it, but a good portion. It was catered towards ponies, so the Zebras rejected it and burned it. Must have been two decades ago, but I don’t remember much about it.” “All of the books were burned?” Haze frowned. She wasn’t much of a reader, words bored her, but she found herself sorrowful of the knowledge lost in that fire. “I think some of the ponies here saved a good bunch of them. Oh, I could show you where the ponies live,” Xoqan offered. “Sure.” The tour found itself in a rundown neighborhood. Nearly everyone here was a pony, except for a few Zebra guards at the posts on street corners. Many of the buildings were boarded up or missing glass in the windows. Haze still saw ponies entering some of the houses that were without windows or shingles on their roofs. Ponies lived like this here? “Why do ponies stay here if they’re forced to live like this?” Haze wondered. “Not sure. Maybe Zebras just provide excellent protection,” Xoqan said, a small tint of pride in his response. “Oh yeah, what’s with the guards?” Haze hadn’t noticed this many guards in any other neighborhood of the city. “Peacekeepers. Tries to stop the crime caused by gangs. Both from ponies and Zebras. It’s worse down here.” “Guess that’s why those fuckfaces were trying to fight you where the guards wouldn’t see,” Haze said. “I guess,” Xoqan sighed. As they passed, a foal sitting on a porch looked to Haze sadly. Were pony foals not allowed to participate in class with Zebra piers? “Y’see, during the war, Equestria tried shoving all its Zebra citizens into confined areas, one of them being Quagga,” Xoqan explained. “They said it was for their own safety, but we all know it was a way to snoop out spies. Not like there really were that many.” Haze was unsure what any of this had to do with the state of the city now. “So, Quagga gave the same treatment to their pony residence and kept them in a corner of the town.” “But all that shit happened so long ago, why punish ponies now?” Haze countered. Xoqan shook his head then looked at Haze pensively. “The hell do I know. Why do you think I give them fair treatment? Guess that’s why some of my people are all on my ass.” Almost incidentally, a voice rang out from behind them. “Xoqan wait!” Haze tensed, ready for this to be another fight. But when she turned to look the tan pony coming their way wore no expression of malice. If anything, he appeared anxious. Xoqan turned to face him. “I heard you’re looking for some Med-X.” The pony began rummaging through a pocket on his baggy shawl. His hoof pulled out a syringe of purple liquid. Xoqan’s eyes lit up. “Seriously? Thank you.” The tan pony dropped the syringe in Xoqan’s hoof. “No, it’s to thank you for what you did yesterday. I wish I could give you more, but that’s all I’ve got.” “It’s still appreciated,” Xoqan assured and stored the syringe in a bag on his side. The tan pony stepped away a few hoof lengths, his composure uncomfortable. “Um, okay then. Bye.” The Earth Pony swiveled then returned the way he came. Xoqan smirked. “There’s some perks to helping others.” Haze nodded. She too dreamed of being recognized for her good deeds. Sure, it felt good to know you helped someone, but it was extra better when others knew how stupendous you are. Maybe some see that as conceited, but it was a feeling that gave Haze vitality. It was a craving that pushed her to achieve even better accomplishments. “So, are you going to use it?” Haze used her muzzle to point to the pouch where Xoqan held the Med-X. “Huh? Oh, no. It’s only one dose, gotta save it for when I really need it. I’m on some other painkillers right now. They aren’t as strong, but I’m managing. I kinda wanna save the Med-X for the journey, y’know?” “Yeah, that’s a good idea,” Haze agreed. After a few minutes, Haze noticed that Xoqan wasn’t leading the trail like he had. His position was almost parallel to Haze’s as they walked. There was a distant gaze in his green eyes. “You okay?” Haze asked. Xoqan perked his ears and looked at her. “Oh, I was just thinking... While I really do want to travel, and I am excited, I was wondering... who’s going to protect the ponies while I’m gone?” Somehow, that surprised Haze. “Don’t you have any friends who are also friends with ponies and are willing to help them?” she said. “I mean, yeah. But they’ve always looked to me to do the heavy lifting. I guess I could let them know...” “You shouldn’t worry too much about them- the ponies I mean. They have to learn to stand for themselves without you either way. And there are guards for a reason,” Haze reasoned. “I guess you’re right. I suppose we’ll just have to wait and see how well they fare when we come back.” The idea of Xoqan returning to his home saddened Haze. She felt as if he was someone she could really get along with. Couldn’t he become a part of her team? He was similar to Haze in many ways. She adored that despite him being self absorbed, he also cared about the safety of others and fought for justice. On their way back to his house, Xoqan showed SwiftHaze the marketplace. She eyed around to see if could spot Chance and Ray, but her friends were never seen. Haze was quite intrigued with how the market worked. Some trades were even made by exchanging goods instead of caps. She wanted to see what items were for sale, but knew she shouldn’t tarry too long. “Thanks for the tour,” Haze said as she stood under the window she had escaped from. “You’re awesome.” “I know,” Xoqan boasted. That made Haze chuckle a bit. She craned her neck to look above the wagon. “Erm, how do I get back up there?” She wasn’t able to fly, and the wagon’s roof was too tall to climb. “Here,” Xoqan said from behind her. A surge of panic rippled through her coat as she felt something foreign grab her sides. Haze was gently lifted off the ground. She realized it was Xoqan’s dark magic placing her on top of the wagon. Somehow, this magic felt different then that of a Unicorn, yet Haze couldn’t put a hoof on how. Once Xoqan let her go, she climbed into the window on her own. Ungracefully, she flopped chin-first onto the floor of the bedroom. She gathered the rest of herself and closed the window. All was quiet for a while. Eventually Ayza did check in on Haze. “Hi,” the Pegasus said casually when the Zebra entered her room. Ayza’s eyes narrowed. “I am aware you sneaked out.” “What are you talking about?” Haze replied quickly. “I’ve been here this whole time.” “I am not stupid, pony. Do you think your friends would not have noticed your disappearance and tell me?” “Shit,” Haze hissed. She didn’t think about her pony companions coming into the room when they returned from the marketplace. “I am already accustomed to my son sneaking out. I should expect the same from an impatient pony like you.” “Sorry,” Haze grimaced. “You need to stay put and heal!” Ayza reprimanded. “But it’s not like I was using my wing. I’m fine. I don’t get why I can’t just walk around,” Haze complained. Ayza took a few steps forward. “You must rest your whole body for the healing to be the most efficient.” She extended her hoof towards Haze’s wing. “When is the last time you changed your bandages?” Haze flinched as Ayza began unwrapping her wound. The bandages fell onto the bed which Haze was sitting on. “Hmm, this is more healed than I had expected,” Ayza noted as she examined the now narrow gash. Quickly, Haze thought up a false explanation. “I um... may have gone into the market and bought a healing potion.” Groaning, Ayza rubbed between her eyes with a hoof. “Foolish pony, so impatient. Let me retrieve new bandages.” As Ayza exited through the doorway, Haze could see OrchidRays step aside stiffly in the hallway. She walked into the room quietly. “So... did you get the supplies we need?” Haze brought up abruptly before Ray could mention her disappearance “Yeah, we got a lot,” Ray said, although not in her usual cheery tone. “Chance is going out with Xoqan now to ask about his mom.” Haze nodded, then asked hesitantly, “Did... he say anything about me? Was he upset?” “Chance? No, he seemed fine. He was focused on trading.” Ray scuffed the floor with her natural hoof. “What’s wrong?” “A Zebra said I’m weird,” Ray replied. Haze raised one of her bushy brows. “They’re a Zebra,of course they’re going to think ponies are weird. They are different than us, so they’re going to see us differently. That doesn’t mean you’re weird,” Haze assured. Ray shrugged. “I dunno. She didn’t like me touching things in her shop, and said I was nosy.” “Hmm, maybe that’s not proper Zebra etiquette,” Haze conjured a guess. “Not like you would have known. Don’t let a random comment from a random Zebra get you down. I think you’re awesome.” Ray gave her a little smile. That evening, GleamingChance reported that all the Zebras he had encountered had not recognized the photo of his mother. Many Zebras outright ignored him, in which Xoqan had to persuade them to get an answer. While discouraged, Chance hadn't lost all hope. They still had another city to search. The next morning, SwiftHaze drank another healing potion to ensure she would be prepared to travel. Ayza spoke her disapproval of the decision before she expressed concern over her son’s departure. “I’m gonna be fine, ma,” Xoqan was saying. “If anything, I’d be looking after these all.” He tilted his head to the trio of ponies. Ayza sighed. “I know you can take care of yourself. But if you cannot bring your father back, at least keep yourself safe. I want you home intact.” “We’ll try our best to find Dad, y’know,” Xoqan assured. “Thank you for taking care of us while we stayed here,” Chance spoke up. His magic passed over a small pouch to Ayza. It jangled with the sound of caps as it dropped in her hoof. “Especially Haze,” Chance added and glanced at the Pegasus. “Right?” “Huh, oh, yeah!” Haze blurted out. “You’re awesome Ayza! Sorry for being so difficult.” Clicking her tongue, Ayza just shook her head. “Let’s not waste anymore time,” Xoqan announced. “Let’s get goin’. Love ya, Ma!” “Hey, hey, who made you the boss?” Haze challenged Xoqan. “I call the shots around here.” “Well, you better speak up, or I might just take charge of this mission while we search for my dad.” Haze scrunched her nose, not liking the thought of that. She liked Xoqan, but didn’t want to compete with him to be the team’s lead. Hopefully this was just playful banter. “Bye!” OrchidRays exclaimed and waved to Ayza. Haze latched the wagon’s harness to her torso. She felt Chance’s magic reinforce the tightness of the strap. Xoqan directed Haze which way to navigate through the city. Soon enough the east gate of Quagga approached them. With a few smooth words, Xoqan had the guards open the gates for them. The metal doors rattled as they slid apart. The town of foreign eyes was now trailing behind Haze’s tail and their wagon. Beyond was a vast wasteland filled with the unknown.