It was morning in Canterlot. Twilight, flanked by Spike and a small group of guards, was heading the dedication ceremony of Canterlot's new hospital.
"We all know how important proper healthcare is." She announced. "Which is why I'm proud to cut the ribbon to this facility dedicated to giving you, the citizens of Canterlot, the care you deserve!"
The crowd cheered as Twilight cut the ribbon with the requisite oversized scissors.
"Pretty schmaltzy speech, if you ask me." Spike joked.
"Sometimes, schmaltzy works." Twilight grinned.
Just then, there was a small commotion in the crowd
"Pardon me! Coming through!" A donkey with a slicked back mane, an expensive (albeit slightly gaudy) suit and an overly-enthusiastic smile pushed through the gathered ponies. Once free of the crowd, he confidently approached the royal entourage. "Princess Twilight Sparkle! Such an honor to meet you in the flesh!"
"Hold it right there, mister." One of the guards blocked the donkey's path.
"Relax, metalhead." The donkey said condescendingly. "I just want to have a word with the Princess."
"The Princess is very busy." The guard said bluntly. "She has no time for chitchat with random passers-by."
The donkey's smile faltered slightly, then kicked back into high gear.
"Did I say 'word'?" He grinned. "I meant 'opportunity'! The opportunity of a lifetime! I gotta feeling she'll love to hear this!"
"What are you, a used carriage salesdonkey?" Another guard scoffed, joining the first in blocking the donkey's path. "I'd say you're barking up the wrong tree here."
"Stand down, guardsponies." Twilight stepped forward.
"But your highness-" The first guard protested.
"There's no harm in hearing him out." Twilight faced the donkey.
"Thank you, your highness." The donkey smiled. "Such a munificent ruler, I've always said..."
"A pleasure to meet you, Mr.-?" Twilight prompted.
"Please, call me Barley." The donkey said gregariously.
"Okay then, Mr. Barley." Twilight nodded. "What is this 'opportunity' you mentioned."
"An opportunity to get your story on stage." Barley smiled. "An opportunity to ensure all of Equestria sees the wonder that is you and your friends saving our land from evil!"
"You lost me there." Spike frowned.
"I want to put together a theatrical production revolving around you and your friends." Barley announced. "One that will show all of Equestria what amazing ponies you all are, written using a combination of eyewitness accounts and what was in that journal you published a while back. Of course, I wouldn't dream of pursuing such an endeavor without your royal go-ahead. And, possibly, a small patronage to help with the costs?"
"Called it." The second guard scoffed.
"Just think of it, your highness." Barley urged. "The tale of the six heroes of Equestria, being told told far and wide, recreated by a band of skilled actors... No offense to that wonderful journal you put out, but seeing your amazing deeds performed onstage would really get your message across. So, what do you say?"
"It does sound like a effective way to continue spreading the virtues of friendship." Twilight mused. "But it's not just up to me. My friends should be able to have their say too."
"Of course, of course." Barley nodded, slightly deflated by this complication.
"We're scheduled to meet in just over a week's time." Twilight announced. "I can talk to them then. And if they'll all board with your idea, then I'll gladly provide you with your small patronage."
"Excellent." Barley smiled, passing Twilight a business card. "I look forward to hearing the results. Now, I suppose I've already taken up enough of your precious time. Until we might again, your highness!"
Stopping only to bow, Barley departed from the scene. Spike took a glance at the card he'd given Twilight. Barley Bonanza: Maker of Dreams, it read, with an address printed below the gleaming raised gold letters.
"Well, he seemed... enthusiastic." The young dragon snarked.
"Why wouldn't he be?" Twilight smiled. "This is quite a venture. Personally, I think it's a great idea. But let's see what the others think about it.
Just over a week later...
At the Council of Friendship's next meeting, Twilight brought up Barley and his proposed production to her friends. The others seemed quite receptive to the idea.
"A play, all about us?" Rainbow Dash smiled. "Sounds great to me!"
"And myself, also." Rarity smiled. "I've always had something of a fondness for the theatre."
"It would be a great way to get our message out..." Fluttershy nodded.
"And a great way to give ponies a fun show!" Pinkie added.
"As long as it tells the truth of our story, Ah say Ah'm all fer it." Applejack declared.
"I guess I'm in, too." Spike shrugged. "Might be fun, seeing us all on stage... as long as the bill isn't too steep."
"So it's settled then." Twilight nodded. "I'll let Barley know as soon as possible. I'm sure he'll be thrilled."
The next day...
Twilight and Spike dropped by the address written on the card Barley had given. It was a fairl large building, with posters in the windows from previous productions. Barley was, of course, ecstatic to hear the news.
"Wonderful, wonderful!" He smiled brightly. "I'm so glad to hear you're all onboard with my little production!"
"My friends all thought it was a great idea." Twilight nodded. "You have our complete blessing. Now, onto the matter of the small patronage you mentioned before."
"Ah, yes." Barley's smile faltered. "The price we must pay to bring our personal visions to life... Now, in order to bring your amazing story to the stage, we must have the very best for the production; actors, set designs, special effects, what have you..."
"Get to the point, already." Spike urged.
"This is just a ballpark figure, but I'm fairly certain that in order to put on this production, I'm going to need five, maybe six... hundred Bits."
"Seriously?!" Spike gaped.
"You know what they say, little dragon: Ya gotta spend money to make money." Barley shrugged.
"That is a lot of Bits." Twilight mused, suddenly unsure about Barley's venture.
"Yes, it is, your highness." Barley nodded. "But I have every faith that this show of mine will be a smash hit. I can assure you with the utmost confidence that you will get a return on your investment in no time. And ultimately, isn't it a small price to pay, to ensure that as many ponies as posssible are reached by your ideals?"
"Well, I suppose the royal treasury can spare it at the moment." Twilight thought logically. "Even with the cost of rebuilding from Dread's attack, we still have a few Bits to spare. It helps that trade with Equestria's neighbors has been on the upswing lately... okay Barley, you have a deal. I'll see to it that you receive the Bits by the end of the week."
"Marvelous!" Barley grinned wide enough for Twilight and Spike to count every tooth in his mouth. "You won't regret this, Princess, I promise!"
"I should hope so." Twilight declared. "But I also hope your production proves to be everything you say it is."
"You have my word, your highness." Barley nodded. "Now, with all due respect, I must end our meeting here. There is a lot of preparations to get underway. With luck, the production should be raring to go in a matter of weeks."
"The best of luck to you, then." Twilight smiled. "Come on, Spike. Let's leave him to it."
As they departed, Spike appraised the situation.
"Well, no turning back now." He noted. "You sure we can trust this guy? We've dealt with con artists before. And that was a lot of Bits he was asking for..."
"Oh, Spike." Twilight rolled her eyes. "It's not like he's Flim and Flam. And even they wouldn't be greedy enough to try and rip off Equestria's ruler."
"Yeah, I guess." Spike sighed. "Let's just hope he keeps his word, and pays us back..."
As soon as she got back to the castle, Twilight arranged for a cheque to be sent to Barley's address, covering the patronage he requested. And in the coming weeks, posters advertising the upcoming production started going up around Canterlot.
Naturally, the community was abuzz with excitement, as were Twilight and her friends when their next meeting rolled around.
"Have you seen the posters for this thing?" Rainbow Dash asked excitedly.
"Quite a display, no doubt." Rarity nodded. "Gives one the impression that it will be a grand show indeed."
"I'm so excited!" Pinkie squealed. "I've already booked tickets for me and Maud on the premiere date! She loves a big night out..."
"Ah'd like tah see it right away mahself." Applejack admitted. "But Ah got sum harvestin' tah do. But Ah'm sure Ah'll get around to it before our next meetin'."
"My schedule is pretty packed too." Twilight acknowledged. "Maybe you can let me know how it went?"
"Will do." Applejack nodded.
"I'm sure we'll all have seen it by then." Rarity noted. "Right, Fluttershy?"
"Big crowds aren't usually my thing, but I think I can find the time to see it." Fluttershy admitted. "I just hope my character has plenty of animal friends..."
"It's gonna be awesome!" Rainbow Dash grinned.
"It better be, with all the Bits Barley was asking for." Spike crossed his arms. "I'd hate to think all that money went to a total dud."
"Have a little faith, Spike." Twilight gently chided him. "Don't forget, the point of this play is to continue spreading the word of what we all believe in: The magic of friendship. As long as it accomplishes that, I'd call it a success."
"We'll see soon enough, I suppose..." Spike mused.
Soon after the Council of Friendship's meeting, the play opened to the public. While Twilight's royal schedule prevented her from attending herself, she kept an eye on the local newspapers, and saw that the reviews were highly favorable.
"'This new production, based on Equestria's six heroes, is a sheer wonder from start to finish'." Twilight smiled as she read a review aloud.
"'Talented actors, top-notch special effects. and a fantastic story make this performance a joy to behold'." Spike read another review. "Looks like Barley came through after all."
"He sure did." Twilight smiled.
Barely a week later, Twilight was surprised to receive a visit from Barley.
"Good to see you again, your highness." Barley smiled.
"I hear the play is going well." Twilight noted.
"Indeed it is." Barley smiled. "So well, in fact, that I can give you this."
Barley handed Twilight a piece of paper, which turned out to be a cheque for the six hundred Bits Twilight had sent to him.
"As promised, every Bit accounted for." Barley nodded.
"You made it all back already?!" Spike gaped.
"What can I say?" Barley shrugged. "It's a very popular show, just as we'd hoped it would be."
"So the papers have been saying." Twilight noted. "It looks like patronizing your show was a good call."
"Indeed it was, your highness." Barley smirked. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I really must be heading off. We have another show scheduled for just after noon. Showbiz is rewarding, but so much hard work..."
"Then don't let me keep you." Twilight smiled.
"Perish the thought, your highness." Barley paused only to bow, then departed.
"How about that..." Spike mused, glancing at the cheque once more.
"That's one way of putting it." Twilight chuckled, as she passed the cheque to a guard. "Run this down to the royal treasury, would you?"
"At once, your majesty." The guard nodded.
Twilight smiled as she leaned back slightly in her throne.
"Somepony looks happy." Spike teased.
"Why shouldn't I be?" Twilight replied. "With every performance of Barley's play, more and more will be shown how powerful friendship is. How can I not be happy about this?"
By the time of the next meeting of the Council of Friendship, Twilight was still in high spirits. Unfortunately, it was not to last...
"So, has everypony gotten the chance to see Barley's play yet?" She asked.
To her surprise, the other shared awkward looks.
"Oh, we've seen it alright." Applejack frowned. "And we got sum problems with it..."
"What kind of problems?" Spike asked.
"Well, for starters, the writers seem to have taken some... liberties with our characters." Rarity said hesitantly.
"That's one way of puttin' it." Rainbow Dash scowled. "Another way is that they're making us look like one-dimensional goofballs!"
"They're what?" Twilight frowned.
"It's true." Applejack scowled. "They're makin' me sound like Ah'm jest some dumb hick, who's only honest 'cuz Ah don't think before openin' mah mouth!"
"My character mostly stands there and looks pretty." Rarity pouted. "Just pretty, mind you. Not 'stunning', not gorgeous, just pretty!"
"And my character barely speaks at all." Fluttershy frowned. "I counted about three, maybe four lines in the entire play."
"Stage Pinkie just bounces around, making silly noises." Pinkie declared irritably. "I like silly, but not that much!"
"It's better than what I got." Rainbow pouted. "According to the script, I'm just 'the fast one'!"
"But you are the fast one." Pinkie pointed out.
"There's way more to me than that, you know!" Rainbow Dash pointed out. "There's nothing there about my coolness, my fearlessness... not even my loyalty!"
"That can't be right." Twilight frowned. "Being the Element of Loyalty is a crucial part of who you are. I don't believe that would be left out..."
"Believe it, Twi." Rainbow Dash said sourly.
"What about me?" Spike asked. "How's my character been messed up?"
The others shared another awkward look.
"Your character hasn't been 'messed up', per se." Rarity said delicately.
"Because it's not really a character at all." Rainbow Dash added.
"It's... a dummy that actor Twilight carries around." Fluttershy cringed.
"Say what?!" Spike gaped.
"A very well-designed dummy." Pinkie added, trying to put a positive spin on things.
"Sorry, pardner, but that's how it is." Applejack acknowledged.
"I probably may regret this, but what about me?" Twilight asked.
"Your character says 'By my calculations...' every couple of minutes!" Rainbow Dash noted. "Makes you sound like an even bigger egghead than you actually are!"
"And she acts more like a commanding officer than a friend." Fluttershy added. "Giving us orders instead of guidance..."
"I can't believe I'm hearing this..." Twilight shook her head. "This doesn't sound like an accurate representation of us at all."
"At least your character can actually move on her own." Spike scowled.
"Spike, make some room in the schedule." Twilight declared. "We are seeing this play for ourselves."
"You don't have to watch that travestry, darling." Rarity told her.
"I trust your opinions, but I have to see what exactly is wrong with the production myself." Twilight said firmly. "With my own eyes."
"Just be prepared for a lot of cringe." Pinkie warned.
One week later, Twilight and Spike made their way to the Canterlot Royale Theatre. With the play being so popular, it had been difficult to book tickets, even for a Princess.
The house was packed with patrons. Previously, Twilight had seen this as a good thing, but now she wasn't so sure. If the play was indeed twisting the characters of Twilight and her friends, then the idea of so many ponies seeing it was suddenly mortifying to her.
"The VIP box should be this way." Spike declared. "All the better to get a good view of whatever mess this turns out to be..."
"Maybe it's not all bad." Twilight said, more to herself than to Spike. "Let's try and stay positive."
"Princess Twilight!" A lavender Earth Pony mare wearing a fake horn, wig, tail, wings and cute mark approached. "I can't believe you're here!"
"Hello?" Twilight said, slightly nonplussed to see this faux doppelganger approach her.
"I'm Stardust Sidestep." The counterfeit Twilight announced. "I play you in the show. Well, I guess you've already figured that one out..." She blushed, showing off her prosthetics.
"Nice to make your acquaintance." Twilight nodded.
"Are you here to see the play?" Stardust asked.
"That's the plan." Twilight nodded. "After all the work Barley put into it, I think it's only polite."
"Oh, Barley's just the best, isn't he?" Stardust smiled. "He wrote the entire script himself, you know."
"We actually didn't know that." Spike noted.
"Barley wouldn't happen to around at the moment, would he?" Twilight asked.
"Sorry, but no." Stardust answered. "He's usually backststage cheering us on like the involved producer he is. But right now, he's busy negotiating merchandising terms with somepony."
"Fair enough." Twilight shrugged, managing to hide her disappointment.
"I'd love to stay and chat some more, but I should get backstage." Stardust said, her eyes flicking over to a clock on the wall. "It's five minutes until curtain up." As she dashed away, she looked back at Twilight. "Hope you enjoy the show!"
"She seemed nice." Spike declared.
"She was." Twilight agreed. "And if an actress is so enthusiastic about their work, how bad can it really be?"
"We're about to find out." Spike answered. "Five minutes until curtain up, remember?"
"Oh, right." Twilight acknowledged. "We'd better get to our seats."
Twilight and Spike quickly made their way up to the VIP box. Soon after they'd taken their seats, the house lights dimmed, and the orchestra began playing a jaunty theme. This was followed by the curtain rising, revealing Stardust in her role as Twilight, a dummy of Spike perched on her back.
"Oh, come on!" Spike hissed. "That doesn't even look like me!"
"Shh." Twilight hushed him, so she could hear Stardust speak.
"Equestria is in mortal peril." Stardust announced, performing a passable impersonation of Twilight's voice. "The forces of darkness threaten to engulf it."
On the other side of the stage, ponies dressed as Nightmare Moon, Queen Chrysalis (with illusory holes painted on the legs of the costume), King Sombra and Lord Tirek emerged, laughing wickedly.
"But all is not lost." Stardust continued. "Not when I have my friends by my side."
Actors dressed up as Twilight's friends joined her.
"By my calculations, the six of us together should be enough to handle any threat." Stardust declared.
"We're with you, Twilight!" The Rarity actress nodded, flicking her false mane extravagently as she struck a pose more fitting of a supermodel than a defender of Equestria.
"Sounds like fun!" The Pinkie actress declared, bouncing around on springs built into false hooves she was wearing.
"Let's take these baddies down fast, fast, fast!" The Rainbow actress cheered. "Right, Fluttershy?"
"Right." The Fluttershy actress spoke in a barely audible whisper.
"Okay, our friends' characters do seem to be a little... simplified." Twilight noted awkwardly.
"Just remember to do everything I say, and you'll be fine." Stardust said with faux authority. "Not just because I'm a royal Alicorn, or because of my superior intelligence. But because I'm your leader. Without my guidance, you'd be doomed to fail."
"What?!" Twilight gaped.
"Whatever ya say, Twi." The Applejack actress remarked, in an overly thick fake accent. "With your brains leadin' the charge, we can't lose!"
"Wow." Spike gaped in dismayed disbelief at the actor's rendition of his friend. "Just... wow."
As the play went on, Twilight found herself becoming more and more outraged by how she and her friends were being portrayed. It was actually worse than her friends had described it; each of their characters had been whittled down to the bare minimum of what made them who they are, and ruthlessly played for parody.
"Ah sure do love apples." The actress Applejack declared, kicking a tree prop that yielded several fake apples. "If Ah could, Ah'd make a whole house outta apples!"
The audience had a good laugh at this, to Twilight and Spike's displeasure.
"What this forest needs is a few dozen mirrors." The Rarity actor pouted grandly. "What good is there in looking so amazing if you can't admire yourself every few seconds?"
"I say it needs some streamers and balloons!" The actress Pinkie leapt up on her hoof strings and slapped one of the prop tree's branches. "Nature can be so dull sometimes..."
"What this forest really needs is less trees." The Rainbow Dash actress complained, fidgeting her hooves like the stage was made of hot coals. "I need to go fast, and these dumb things are in the way!"
More laughter.
"At least there's plenty of animals here." The Fluttershy actress practically whispered, hugging a group of cute animal props. "Can't we just stay here for a little while?"
"Focus, ponies." Stardust said authoritively. "We're here to save Equestria, remember?"
"Oh, right!" Actress Applejack threw aside her apples.
"We're such a bunch of ding-dongs!" Actress Pinkie declared, putting on a goofy expression.
"Where would we be without you leading us, Twilight?" Actress Rarity smiled.
Actress Fluttershy simply nodded, dropping the prop animals.
"They're acting like mindless soldiers." Twilight frowned. "That's definitely not how our friends act!"
"No kidding..." Spike shook his head.
The end of the play seemed to take forever to arrive, but it did. The faux-Mane Six faced off against the villain actors.
"Your evil ends here, wicked ones!" Stardust proclaimed. "Feel the power of our rightous magic!"
Several multi-colored lights illuminated the stage. Then for a brief moment, the lights shut off, leaving the stage cloaked in darkness. Moments later, the lights returned, with the faux-Mane Six standing triumphant in the center.
"As long as we stand together, Equestria will be safe." Stardust announced. "The citizens of this great land can sleep soundly, knowing that our matchless power will protect them. For Equestria!"
"Equestria!" The others chanted.
The audience were quick to applaud and cheer. The curtain promptly fell, marking the end of the play.
"Jeez." Spike cringed. "It's even worse than our friends described it."
"There wasn't one mention of the Elements of Harmony." Twilight shook her head in disbelief. "The key elements of friendship, thrown to the side and dismissed!"
"So that's a fail in historical accuracy, too." Spike shook his head.
As they departed, Twilight's mood worsened from hearing the audience talking about the play.
"That was so funny!" One Pegasus mare remarked. "Especially the pink one!"
"I never would've guessed Princess Twilight was such a drill sergeant." A Unicorn stallion remarked. "Still, can't argue with results..."
"And somepony needs to keep those goofballs in line." An Earth Pony mare added. "Hard to believe they're the one who saved Equestria so many times..."
"This is awful." Twilight fretted. "Barley's play is making us look like a joke!"
"So much for 'showing all of Equestria what amazing ponies you all are'." Spike echoed the words Barley had spoken during their first meeting.
"You're right, Spike." Twilight scowled. "This is absolutely not what Barley claimed it would be. I think it's time we had a talk with the producer. And when I say 'we', I mean 'we'..."
Once they returned to the castle, Twilight had Spike send letters to their friends, requesting that they come to Canterlot so they could confront Barley together.
And so it was that Twilight led her friends to Barley's office. As they moved through Canterlot, a group of foals pointed at Applejack and chuckled.
"Hate tah say 'Ah told ya so', but..." Applejack said sourly.
"You were right." Twilight sighed. "More right than I could have possibly feared."
"That Barley is going to a get a piece of my mind!" Rainbow snarled.
"All our minds, darling." Rarity added.
"I hope he had a light breakfast!" Pinkie declared, in what she thought was a threatening tone.
"I'm just hoping we can straighten this mess out." Fluttershy noted.
The group entered the building that served as Barley's base of operations.
"May I help you, your highness?" The receptionist asked nervously.
"We're just hear to have a word with Barley." Twilight declared. "Is he here?"
"He's right through that door." The receptionist pointed across the room.
"Thank you." Twilight nodded.
With Twilight leading the charge, the Mane Six passed through the door, finding Barley sitting at a desk, looking over what appeared to be merchandising contracts.
"Barley, we need to talk." Twilight said flatly.
"Princess." Barley noted his expression darkening at the sight of Twilight's own, clearly disgruntled look. "Not that I wouldn't be fine chatting with my show's patron, but I am a very busy donkey, and I'm sure ruling Equestria means your schedule is packed, too. Maybe in future, you should make an appointment with my secretary, so we can discuss whatever's on your mind at our leisure?"
"I'm afraid this can't wait." Twilight replied. "My friends and I want to talk to you about the... creative direction your play has gone in."
"Okay." Barley nodded. "What about the creative direction do you want to talk about?"
"How about the parts where you make us look like a bunch of one-dimensional lame-os?" Rainbow Dash swooped in.
"Not tah mention yah left out the parts a' our characters that really matter!" Applejack added.
"In my defense, there's only so much that can fit into a single show." Barley shrugged dispassionately. "Some things have to be excised for a smoother narrative."
"When you pitched the idea of the play to me, I was led to believe it would be a deep, compelling story about myself and my friends, and how important the power of friendship is in keeping Equestria safe." Twilight declared. "But what I saw out there was more like a farce. You made our mission into a joke."
"And us, into the bargain." Rarity added.
"And not even a good joke!" Pinkie declared.
"Well, I appreciate your opinion, your highness." Barley remarked, barely phased by Twilight's remarks. "And those of your friends. But in all honesty, I'm the only one there with a knowledge of theatre. This show has been a huge success just the way it is, so I'm not changing a thing about it."
"Even if it's not the real truth about what we stand for?" Fluttershy prompted glaring at hm.
"Pretty much yeah." Barley smirked.
"Is this a joke to you?" Twilight scowled. "Because it's not very funny."
"Not even close." Pinkie added. "And believe me, I know funny."
"Oh, it's funny, alright." Barley retorted. "Funny how ponies are so quick to give up their hard-earned Bits to see this show..."
"That's all yah really care about it, ain't it?" Applejack glared coldly, Barley's words reminding her of two other so-called entrepeneurs. "This show wuz never about sendin' a message. It wuz about linin' yer own pockets, weren't it?"
"That's showbiz, country gal." Barley smirked.
"Barley, as your patron, I'd prefer that you take the input of myself and my friends seriously." Twilight insisted.
"Oh, we're past that." Barley said bluntly. "You so graciously provided me with the Bits I needed to start this production, and I paid that money in due course. So technically, you're not my patron anymore. Our business has concluded. And that means your opinion, and the opinions of your flunkies, holds less water with me than a colander."
"What did you just call us?" Rainbow flew into Barley's face, only to be held back by Applejack.
"I knew there was something I didn't like about you." Spike scowled.
"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't see you there." Barley smirked. "For a while, I thought Princess Twilight had one of our promotional Spike dolls with her."
"Say what?!" Spike spluttered.
"Barley, the show I saw was not what we discussed." Twilight declared.
"And what did we discuss, exactly?" Barley pointed out. "I never misrepresented my designs. I told you the play would be about you and your friends defending Equestria from evil. Or was that not what you saw happening on stage? All of you?"
The group fell silent, aware that Barley was technically correct. Despite the twisting of their characters, the end result was indeed what he described.
"Exactly." Barley nodded smugly. "Now, while it's always nice seeing you, Princess, I need to get back to work. Being the producer of Canterlot's top-rated stage show is exhausting. I have contracts to sign, deals to make, actors to encourage, ans many, many Bits to count. So if you don't mind, I need to end this tedious conversation and get back to work."
"Tedious?!" Applejack frowned.
Twilight glared at Barley's smug expression feeling as if she was looking upon him for the first time - and she didn't like what she saw.
"Come on, everypony." She sighed. "It's clear that this is a waste of time."
"Glad we're on the same page." Barley smirked.
The others reluctantly followed Twilight out of the building.
"Well, that wuz a whole lotta hot air." Applejack shook her head.
"So what now?" Rainbow asked.
"I... I don't know." Twilight sighed.
"Well, we gotta do something!" Rainbow Dash urged.
"Why don't you just use your clout as Princess to close the show?" Spike suggested.
"I may be ruler of Equestria, but that doesn't mean I can just make a royal edict to shut down the play just because we don't like it." Twilight pointed out. "I'm not a tyrant!"
"Of course you're not, darling." Rarity smiled encouragingly.
"If everypony wants to see this show, we can't exactly stop them." Fluttershy admitted.
"So what do we do?" Pinkie asked.
"We need to show everypony that Barley doesn't care about what we really stand for." Applejack declared. "That he only cares about makin' money."
"That won't be easy." Spike noted. "That smarmy donkey's a pretty good actor..."
Spike's words sparked a memory for Twilight, a memory that could prove to be the key to Barley's undoing.
"I think I know a way we can pull that off." Twilight declared. "When I attended the play, I met the actress who plays me, and she told me that Barley is usually backstage, encouraging his actors. And I think I know how we can use that to our advantage..."
That evening, the group marched over to the theatre, making their way backstage. They found Barley speaking to Stardust.
"You're doing great. 'Dusty." Barley declared, pouring on the charm. "You're my little rising star, you know that?"
"I'm just doing my best out there." Stardust said modestly.
"And your best is fantastic." Barley grinned. "I knew from the beginning that making you the show's lead would pay off. It's your wondrous performance that's making this show a success."
"Thank you." Stardust blushed. "But I'm not the only out there, you know. The rest of the cast play their part, too."
"But it would be nothing without you, my dear." Barley smirked. "Now, you'd better get ready. The show's about to start."
"You got it, Barley." Stardust nodded.
As Stardust turned to leave, Twilight and her friends approached the donkey.
"Oh, you again." Barley's smile was quickly replaced by a scowl.
"Yes, us again." Twilight confirmed.
"Did ya really think we were jest gonna let ya keep up this rotten mess of a play?" Applejack pointed out.
Unbeknownst to any of them, Stardust overheard Applejack's words.
"...'Rotten mess'?" She frowned, stopping in her tracks.
"I admire your persistence, but really, what do you think you can do?" Barley smirked. "If Equestria wants to see this show, then you can't stop them."
Twilight and her friends stepped forward, Barley instinctively backing up to keep his distance and feeling of invincibility.
"But we can stop you." Twilight glared.
"Oh?" Barley sneered, enjoying the scenario. "And how do you plan to pull that off? I'm not some psychotic villain you can blast with your brightly-colored 'friendship' beams."
"We've undermined the schemes of lower-level antagonists just as easily." Rarity pointed out.
"And plenty of them were money-grubbing crooks like you." Rainbow Dash added.
"Crook? Please." Barley scoffed. "I've done nothing illegal here."
"No, but you have taken advantage of those who thought they trust you." Twilight retorted. "Us, the public... Even your actors. I met Stardust the night I attended this play. She thinks the world of you!"
"She thinks what I want her to think." Barley said callously. "She's just some airheaded wannabe starlet, like the rest of the cast. Besides, why wouldn't they be grateful? Starring in my production is the highlight of their sad little lives!"
Stardust put a hoof to her mouth in shock. As Barley's words sunk in, her expression changed to anger and hurt.
"So you really are just using everypony for your own benefit." Fluttershy seethed.
"Clearly, you haven't met many producers." Barley snickered.
Stardust caught Twilight's eye, and inclined her head to the left. Twilight silently acknowledged her gesture, and started slowly driving Barley in that direction as she spoke.
"So that's it, is it?" Twilight asked the crooked donkey. "It doesn't matter who you take advantage of - patrons, actors, the general public - as long as you get as many Bits as possible?"
"You're really not getting this, aren't you?" Barley snarled, his patience starting to wear thin. "This is my show. My production. My script. Nothing you do or say can change any of this. So why don't you just take a hint, and let this play be the success it is?"
"Even if it isn't even close to be accurate?" Twilight pushed any further.
With a smirk, Stardust pulled the rope connected to the curtain, allowing the audience to become aware of the show's producer, his back to them.
"I don't care if the story's accurate or not!" Barley scoffed loudly. "And I definitely don't care what you and your friends think! What matters to me is that those pony rubes pay to sit their flanks in the seat and watch. I can portray you any way I want, and they'll eat it up! I can charge anything I want, and those hay-brains will practically empty their wallets for it!"
"My, what a performance." Rarity smiled. "Wouldn't you agree, ladies and gentleponies?"
"What are you talking about?" Barley looked around, trying to find what Rarity was talking about. "What-?" He turned and saw the audience, looking at him with expression of shock, disgust and anger. "Oh."
"He called us rubes!" An Earth Pony stallion snarled.
"And hay-brains!" A Pegasus mare growled.
"He said the show's a lie!" A unicorn stallion gasped. "I was told it was true to life!"
One by one, the audience got out of their seats and advanced onto the stage.
"Okay, folks, let's all just relax." Barley backed away nervously, well aware that things were no longer turning out in his favor. He looked around in the vain hope of getting backup, and saw the rest of the cast also glaring at him, evidently having heard his outburst. With no other choice, he put on his most winning smile. "It seems as though there's been some misunderstandings here..."
"We want our money back!" One Pegasus stallion yelled.
"Yeah!" An Earth Pony mare agreed.
"Fork it over!" Another Unicorn stallion demanded.
"I can understand why you'd want me to do that." Barley's eyes flitted from side to side. "And nothing matters to me more than customer satisfaction. So here's what we're gonna do: you're going to hold on to those ticket stubs, and I'm going to... skedaddle!"
With surprising agility, Barley spun around, and raced toward the exit. The irate crowd chased after him.
"Guess the show's closing early tonight." Pinkie joked.
"I suspect the next batch of reviews won't be as favourable..." Rarity predicted.
"Thanks for the help, Stardust." Twilight smiled. "I was planning on magically recording Barley's words and playing them back in front of everypony, but your idea worked just as well."
"It was the least I could do, your highness." Stardust declared, as she and the other actors approached, all bearing guilty expressions. "I'm sorry we were a part of Barley's lies. We thought we were just putting on a fun show. If we'd known you were expecting something with a little more substance..."
"It's not your fault." Twilight assured her. "Barley misled us all."
"Well, we can certainly try and make up for it." Stardust announced. "We can put on a new play, one that shows what the heroes of Equestria truly stand for. ...That is, if you'd be willing to give us a few pointers?"
"I think that can be arranged." Twilight smiled.
"No time like the present." Rainbow Dash zipped over to her actor counterpart. "First things first: the speed is great, but you've got a lot to learn about portraying the awesomeness that is me. Ya gotta be confident, cool, charismatic. And another thing..."
"Since when did Rainbow become an acting coach?" Fluttershy joked.
"Guess that's showbiz..." Spike chuckled.