Once Spiked, Now Barbed

by David Silver


6 - Government Affairs

Barb skipped along with a pleased smile on her face. She had a second game to plan, and making up O&O stories was fun! She wouldn't play in that one. The other group was small enough that made sense. With this one, she had enough players she could just let them play. "This'll be great!"

"Excuse me." Another pony had almost bumped into her. "I really should watch where I..." Mayor Mare blinked softly, just realizing who she had thumped into. "Spike? Did you get a makeover? Your fins are different."

Barb felt a moment of irritation, but Mayor Mare hadn't been told, so she put it aside. "Hey, Mayor. I'm Barb these days." She hiked two thumbs at herself. "And I look different because I'm a lady dragon on the outside, and the inside."

Mayor Mare frowned in new thought. "Is that so? Have you filled out the paperwork?"

"Wait, what? There's paperwork for that?" Barb rubbed at a cheek. "Do ponies do this often enough for there to be forms?!"

"Of course." Mayor Mare curled on herself, retrieving a few scrolls and sorting through them. "One of... Here." She offered one of them out towards Barb, held in her teeth. "Ponies change their names. It's not common, but it's not rare either. Keeping track of name changes is an important thing for everypony. What if somecreature writes a letter to 'Spike'? It may not reach you!"

Barb took the scroll in a hand. "I never thought about that..."

"And if 'Spike' owes somecreature some bits, less fun, but we should know where to go about that. Similarly, the other way around, if somecreature is trying to find them to give them something. Yes, recording name changes is important. Besides, it could mess with the local census if we think you're two dragons, instead of one who changed their name. I'm not sure we're ready for two friendly dragons."

Barb giggled at that, more of a titter. "Stop that..."

"By the way, why did you change your name?" She inclined her head at the little dragon.

Barb waved her free hand. "Well, on the outside, I went from a little boy dragon to a little lady dragon. So I picked a more, uh, girly name."

Mayor Mare leaned in, looking Barb over anew. Reptiles had so fewer obvious tells about that kind of thing... "I see... Would it be impolite to ask how?"

Barb colored faintly, just a faint tinting of her cheeks. "Discord helped. Twilight knows, in case you're worried."

"You saw my next question coming." Mayor Mare pointed at the scroll Barb was holding. "Fill that out and bring it to town hall, and we'll record it properly, so things don't get more confusing than they have to. Now, Mayoring doesn't take breaks. I should keep going. Have a nice day."

"You too!" She waved at her as Mayor Mare walked past. "That was nice of her." She scrambled over to a nearby box and got to scrawling on the scroll, making note of her old and new name. Cutie mark? She didn't have one of those... She slapped down a handprint instead. Only she would have that.

Folding it back up tight, Barb broke into a jogging sprint towards town hall. "Sooner it's in, the better, and I can do something else." Procrastinating felt silly in that moment.

She burst through the doors to find a pony behind a desk guarding the rest of the building. "Hey there."

"Hello," returned the secretary mare. "Do you have an appointment?"

"No." Barb waved the new scroll at the mare. "Just turning this in."

"Ah." She reached out a hoof and soon brought the scroll in to unfurl in front of her. "Ah, a petition to have your name changed."

Wait... "Petition? Ask? I already change my name."

The secretary shook her head. "You have to ask permission. Once approved, they officially changed your name." She pulled the scroll in and tucked it away. "Until then, you are just using an alias. That isn't against any law, but an alias is not the same as 'your name', legally."

"If you'll wait here, I'll see if there's room for you to be seen today."

Barb come up short, other thoughts aborted. "Oh, yeah! If we can get this all done today that'd be great!"

"One moment." The secretary stepped down from her seat and walked off with the scroll in her mouth. "He's a busy pony. No promises."

Barb leaned against the abandoned desk. "Huh..." She puzzled through things. So, technically? She was Spike, aliased to Barb? That was dumb! Why did laws have to be silly...? Whatever, she was there to fix it!

"Spike?" A stallion with thick glasses was looking at her. "Hey! What are you doing here?"

Barb inclined her head at the pony. "Oh! Tadwell, how's it going?"

Tadwell waved Barb closer. "Doing great. It's busy, as usual. So busy they got two ponies to greet as you come in. You picked the other one." He pointed to the other secretarial desk. "She's alrigh though, does a great job!"

"Hoping. I didn't see you there, sorry about that. Oh, I'm here to get my name changed 'officially'." Barb made a face at that.

"What to?" Tadwell inclined his head. "Gotta know what to call you!"

Barb thrust a hand up and forward at Tadwell. "Barb, at your service."

"Barb... Spike... I like it!" He met the hand with a hoof and a smile. "Nice to meet you again, Barb. Love the spine style. I haven't had a new style of mane in forever..."

Barb fluffed her softer spines. "This isn't just a fashion thing. I'm a girl dragon now."

Tadwell colored. "I had no idea!" Whatever ponies looked for in male vs females, dragons didn't have that. "You did sound more... I didn't want to be rude!"

"You didn't know." She leaned forward, hands on her hips. "But now you do."

"Yes, ma'am!" He coughed into a hoof lightly. "So what are you taking care of?"

"Getting my name changed?" Barb hiked a brow at Tadwell. "I just said that."

"Oh, right." Being short of memory was one of his traits. "Sorry. Hope they get that done nice and quick for you."

"Barb, by the way." She smiled at the forgetful stallion.

"Oh, thank Celestia... I wasn't sure how to ask without looking silly." He wrote the name down quickly just to be sure. "Good luck, Barb!"

Barb waved on her way back to the first desk, seeing the other secretary returning at about the same time. "Good news?"

"Excellent news, for you." She placed a slip of paper on the desk. "Follow this."

Barb reached up, snatching the paper and taking a peek.

Court Summons
Room 305

Spike Dragon

Barb wrinkled her nose. Stupid 'legal names'. "This looks official." There was a time. "That's in a few minutes!"

"He was here and you were here. That isn't an issue, is it?"

"N-no!" She tucked the paper away and jogged past into the building proper. "Thanks!"

She dashed past other working civil workers and up the stairs to the third floor. With a sprint down the hallway, she eyed the plaques as she went. "302, 303, 30..." It skipped, suddenly hitting her target. She reached for the doorknob, just to hesitate. She knocked instead. "Anypony in?"

"Is that Spike?" asked a male voice from within.

"Barb," she corrected, stepping inside to see a judicial stallion seated behind a desk in the small room. "I'm here to make that official?"

"Ah, yes." He shuffled papers and got out a quill. "Why are you changing names?"

Barb waved over herself. "I was a guy on the outside. Now I'm a girl! Still a dragon though. Barb, short for Barbara. I was, uh, told we have to make it 'official'?"

"That is why I'm here, among other reasons." He made dutiful notes with swirls of his pen. "That's not a common reason. Marriage is the most often used reason for name changes."

Barb colored at that. "Not getting married today!"

"A pity." And a new note. "Have you made the community aware of your changed name?"

Barb blinked at that. "I've been telling them as I see them, like just now." She waved between herself and the judge. "Hiya!"

"Hello." He shook his head slowly. "But that's hardly efficient, or sufficient. A name change has to be common knowledge, or you're just making up a nickname for yourself."

Barb tapped at her chin thoughtfully. "Pinkie's planning a big town party about it?"

"Ah, public announcement via Pinkie." He checked a box, as if Pinkie announcement was a specific box to be checked. "That will do nicely.

"For the record, please state your full name." He angled his quill forward, ready to capture it. "Feel free to also note any shortenings or nicknames that may be present."

Barb stood upright at that. "Oh! Barb, short for Barbara. Barbara Dragon." She struck a hopefully triumphant pose, watching him write it down. "So... all good?"

"Almost." The judge brought down a big stamp with a heavy thump. "There you are." He slid the paper across the desk. "This is for your records."

Barb hopped forward, lifting on her wings to snatch the paper. "Thanks!" The paper read nice and clearly that she, Barb, was so forth named. Her old name was gone. Dead. It was all there, in ink on the paper.

She sniffled softly. "Sorry." Why did that matter so much? Like officially moving to a new part of life, she couldn't help but feel it. "Thank you... So that... covers everything?"

"Everything," the judge agreed. "But do complete that announcement. It must be done within one moon to complete the process. After that, you are Barb, short for Barbara, Dragon, and nothing else."

"And nothing else," she breathlessly got out. "Wow..." She hugged the paper close. "Thank you so much!"

Barb burst free of the town hall with a huge smile on her face.

"Oh!" Fluttershy was there, startled by the abrupt exit. "Hello, Barb. You look happy today."

"Because I am!" She waved the paper at Fluttershy. "I'm officially Barb Dragon now."

"Congratulations," she cooed supportively, accepting the paper for a proper look. "Very nice. A lot of ponies have to do this when they get married." She gave the letter back to Spike. "It's an important day for them, and I imagine you too."

Barb gasped, eyes wide. "Woah, I may have to do it again if... that ever happens... Can you do it again?! Did I just mess up?!"

Fluttershy set a hoof on her shoulder. "It's alright. So long as you have a good reason, you can always change your name. You may bother them if you do it too often. They do have the, um, right, to just say no if somepony was asking for a new name every day."

Barb imagined that. "Wow... That really would be annoying. I won't do that, promise."

"I didn't imagine you would." She started past her at a sedate rate. "I came to do some shopping."

"Need some help?" Barb joined her, walking alongside the pegasus. "Oh! Did I mention Rarity is making me some dresses? She is the best at that..."

"She really is." Fluttershy turned an ear on Barb. "I apologize if... this is a rude question." And she went quiet, no question coming.

"Uh, you have to ask a question for it to be rude?"

"But I don't want to be rude," she shyly murmured. "This is new to me."

"You're a friend." She patted Fluttershy on the side. "Go ahead. I'll just not answer if I don't wanna, but I won't get mad. Like you could be mean."

"I can if I want to," Fluttershy defended before gathering herself up. "Did you and Rarity have 'A Talk'?"

Barb recoiled. "Oh! Um... Was... everypony? Wow... Was I the only one that thought that?"

"That's a yes." She folded a wing over Barb, drawing her closer. "I'm sorry."