Twilight vs The Globgogabgalab

by King of Madness


The Shwabble-Dabble-Wabble-Gabble Flibba Blabba Blab

Twilight looked over the new spell book she had gotten, a pensive look on her face. Using her magic she flipped through the pages, stopping on one that seemed important in presentation. "Ugh, this doesn't make any sense."

"What doesn't make sense?"

Twilight turned around to see Spike, who had finished cleaning the library; apron still on and feather duster sill in hand. "I've been looking through this book I got from this traveling salespony yesterday. He said this was a book of spells, but it's just complete nonsense. Half of it isn't even words; at least, not from any language I know of."

Spike folded up his apron and set it aside. "Example?"

Twilight rolled her eyes. "Gobble-fubble-shwibble-bibble Fribba-shwibba."

Spike stared at the unicorn in confusion. "...Huh?"

"Exactly." Twilight groaned as returned to look at the book. "It's a bunch of nonsense! I don't even understand how any of it is supposed to be spells. Like this right here," She pointed to the page she had stopped on. "It looks like some kind of summoning spell, but the words are just more random made-up words." With an incredulous voice, she spoke the words. "'Shwabble dabble glibble glabble schribble shwap glab. Dibble dabble shribble shrabble glibbi-glap shwap. Shwabble dabble glibble glabble shwibble shwap-dap. Dibble dabble shribble shrabble glibbi-shwap glab.'"

Twilight shook her head and turned away from the book. "See?"

Spike shrugged. "Maybe the salespony was pulling a joke on you."

With a groan, Twilight walked away from the book, neither her nor Spike seeing the brief flash erupt from the pages. "Maybe. Wish I had known before I paid ten bits for it. I'm gonna make some coffee."

Spike was about to offer to make it for her when his attention was caught by the still open book on Twilight's desk; specifically, what was coming out of it.

Between the pages of the book, a pale, fleshy blob was bubbling up from within.

"Uhh, Twilight." Spike called, not taking his eyes off the grotesque spectacle unfolding before him.

"I mean, maybe the point was to make me believe it was part of some ancient, forgotten language." Twilight mused to herself as she started making her coffee. "Do you want some, Spike?"

Spike didn't answer, stunned silent as fleshy bubble slowly pulsed, growing with each expand. Soon, it fell from the desk, making a sickening 'plop' sound as it hit the floor. It was still connected to the book, which seemed to be pushing out more and more of the blob. "Twilight..."

"I just don't understand the joke," Twilight continued to muse while heating up the beverage. "Even Pinkie's weirdest pranks have some kind of understandable punchline."

The still growing blob was now as tall as Big Mac and looked to be about a thousand pounds heavier. It was then that two appendages grew from it's mass, becoming arms as the ends became hands.

"Twilight, you might wanna come see this." Spike continued to call.

Blowing on her coffee, Twilight reentered the room and came to Spike's side. "What is it, Spike?" She asked as she took a sip.

Spike simply pointed to the giant skinbag that had finally disconnected from the book.

Twilight spit out her coffee and dropped her cup in shock.

A not-quite-human-like head then emerged from the top of the blob. The creature looked like some monstrous combination of a man, a sack of potatoes, and a giant slug. "Greetings and salutations, my gwibbly-shwimblabgabs."

"What did it call us?" Spike murmured to Twilight.

Twilight shook her head to try and clear it and process what was happening. Evidently, that nonsensical spell she had spoken had worked and now there was a big, obese, lumpy... thing in her library. Clearing her throat, she did the friendly thing and returned the creature's greeting. "H-Hello, uhh, sir? Did I, uhh, summon you?"

The creature chuckled, causing it's whole gelatinous body to jiggly; the sight made both the unicorn and the baby dragon nauseous. "Indeed, you did, Twilight Sparkle."

"You know my name?"

"I know many things. Knowledge is what sustains me."

Something about the way the creature said this made Twilight uncomfortable... or maybe that was just from looking at it.

"Dwimbble shabble-flab, but where are my manners. Allow me to introduce myself," The creature raised it's arms as if asking all to bask in his glory. "I am the Globglogabgalab and I love books." The creature took a moment to admire the library around it. "And I must say, this library is a true treasure trove."

Twilight chuckled nervously as the creature moved passed them with snail-like motion towards to bookshelves. "Uh, thank you. I'm a big lover of books as well. But, if you don't me asking, what exactly is a Glogla-err-Golbgoo-ehh-Grobgop-... whatever you are."

"I am the Globglogabgalab," The creature repeated as it approached the books. "I am the Yeast of Thoughts and Minds."

"Twi," Spike said to a further perplexed Twilight. "If you ask me, this guy is a few sandwiches short of a picnic."

"Oh, don't be rude, Spike," Twilight scolded. "Just because don't know who... or what... or why this creature is, doesn't mean we should treat it like some freak."

Spike raised an eyebrow and motioned a hand at the slithering lardbag.

"So, it looks a bit weird. It says it loves books, that's already something we have in common. I'm sure with a little patience and understandin- What the hay is it doing?!" Twilight shouted upon seeing what the creature was doing.

The Globglogabgalab was pressing it's massive frame against the bookshelves as it slithered along, absorbing the books into it's gelatinous body. It hummed in delight, as if enjoying a tasty meal. "Mmmm, splended! Simply delicious!"

Twilight ran to the creature, hesitating to get too close to it, but fearing for her precious books. "What are you doing?! Those are my books!"

"Dibble gabble fubble-gubble, dibbi shwab-dab." The creature said as it continued to absorb the books into it's body to Twilight's increasing horror. It was then that one of the books appeared from under the creature's tail as it moved.

"Did that thing just poop that out?" Spike asked.

"At least, it's still in good condition." Twilight said as the book seemed unchanged; that is, until she opened it to find all the pages completely blank. Her eyes widened in disbelief as she flipped through the book; not so much as a single letter left. She looked to see a trail of book behind the creature as it continued to take from the defenseless bookshelves. She quickly picked them up and flipped through them to see them in the same state; completely blank. "Oh, the horror!"

Spike rolled his eyes. "Oh, brother."

"You monster!" Twilight shouted at the creature before firing a mighty blast of magic at it. To her shock and further horror, the blast did no more than cause ripples in the creature's mass. Gritting her teeth, she fired off several different spells at the creature to the same effect. Twilight came to the grim realization that the creature was absorbing her magic.

Never before had Twilight been so horrified; despite the creature's slow pace, it was making quick work of her precious collection of literature. Even the books on the higher shelves weren't safe, as they too were simply sucked into the creature's body, only to be pooped out as blank shambles of their former selves. Soon, every book in her library would be rendered blank slates and who's to say the monster would stop there. And none of Twilight's magic worked.

"Spike, do something!" Twilight begged after exhausting her magic in her futile efforts.

Spike scratched his head before taking a deep breath and launching a mighty fire attack at the book-ending blob. It too did nothing to deter the creature.

"No!" Twilight screamed in desperation. She ran at the creature and stabbed her horn into it's body, causing her whole head to sink into it's girth; a horrid business, I might add. Twilight pulled her head out with a gasp and saw the creature's body was still without a scratch. She then proceeded to buck at the creature and grabbed a hold of it's flesh to try and pull it away. "Spike, help me!"

"I'm not touching that thing." Spike said, crossing his arms.

Twilight continued to struggle against the creature; her efforts continued to be futile. Nearly half of her collection was already violated but this monster's insatiable gluttony for writing. She felt tears well up in her eyes; she felt helpless and hopeless.

Spike watched his adoptive sister-mom struggle in vain, wishing there was something he could do. He looked back at the book the creature and come from. Curious, he went over to it, looking over the words that had summoned Twilight's tormentor. "If saying the words summoned it..." Spike got an idea. It was only a hunch, but it was so stupid, it just might work. "Maybe if I say it backwords..." Looking back at the creature continued to absorb books while Twilight pounded at it's doughy frame, Spike decided it wouldn't hurt to try.

Taking a deep breath, Spike carefully read the words in reverse. "Balg Pawhs-ibbilg Elbbarhs Elbbirhs elbbad elbbid. Pad-pawhs elbbiwhs elbbalg elbbilg elbbad elbbawhs. Pawhs palg-ibbilg elbbarhs elbbirhs elbbad elbbid. Balg pawhs elbbirhcs elbbalg elbbilg elbbad elbbawhs." Spike blew a raspberry. "I feel like my tongue is tied in a knot." Spike then saw the book pages flash before him.

The Globglogabgalab was halted in it's slither and gasped as it was pulled back by an invisible force. Twilight let go of the living bag of shwibbly glib-a-kind as it was pulled towards the book. As the creature was pulled away, all the absorbed books that hadn't been digested yet shot out of it's body all over the place; both Twilight and Spike took cover.

"No, no!" The creature yelled as it was sucked into the book tail first, it's great abundance of flesh being pulled into the crack between the pages as it helplessly flailed around. "Gloflibble babble-dap! Oh, what a world, what a world! How could a Drabble-flabbleyab like you defeat my grubble blabble-blab! Noooo!" With that, the last of the creature was sucked in and the book closed.

Both Spike and Twilight stared at the book for a moment, letting the effects that just transpired set in.

"...Well, that was weird." Spike stated.

Shaking her head, Twilight checked one of the books that had shot out of the creature, relieved to see the words and pictures still in their rightful place. While there had been causalities, here library had been saved and for that, she was happy. "Spike, you did it!" She ran to the little dragon and wrapped in in a hug. "You're the best Number #1 Assistant ever!" She squeezed him tight and planted several kisses on his head and cheek.

"Okay, okay; no need to suffocate me." Spike wheezed.

"Oh, sorry," Twilight let go of her embrace. "How did you know saying the words backwards would work? For that matter, how did you say the words backwards at all?"

"To the first question, I didn't know; just thought it was worth giving a try. To the second, I'm a dragon of many talents." Spike boasted.

Twilight chuckled. "That you are, and I'm very grateful." She looked over the reck the library had become and sighed. "Guess we have some cleaning up to do."

"What about that one?" Spike motioned to the book that housed the Globglogabgalab.

Twilight stared at the book for a good long moment before clearing her throat. "Spike, life is full of surprises. I never once in my life thought that my library would be attack by a word-eating blob monster with a ludicrous language. Today I experienced something I never thought I would experience." She gave Spike a serious look. "And now, I'm going do something I never thought I would do."

Twilight then lit the fireplace and threw the book into the flames.