//------------------------------//
// The Higher-Ups aren’t happy. 
// Story: Cutie Mark Camp Blues 
// by Moonbeam Thought Writes 
//------------------------------//


Incident Report: 032A
To: Grand Chancellor of the Council For The Betterment Of Equestria’s Youth, Applebloom
Re: Site 001: Everfree


Dear Applebloom, I am deeply sorry this report had to be written at all. The tragedy that took place could have been prevented, by me, my co-worker, anycreature! This should never have had to happen. It’s my fault its all my fault I’m sorry I’m sorry I’m sorry this is ALL MY FAULT IM SORRY This should be a retrospective lesson in caution, and the dangers of the hiring process. I blame myself. This shouldn’t have happened. Those kids should have had a destiny- a life! I’m sorry Applebloom, this is all my fault. If you wish to fire me for my lack of caution, or any other fault of mine during this debacle, I would gladly support your decision. 

Faithfully awaiting your wisdom, 

Bright Stream.







To: Grand Chancellor of the Council For The Betterment Of Equestria’s Youth, Applebloom
Re: Citric Quartzite


Applebloom, I hope this correspondence finds you well. I write to you in the good faith that you know exactly what kind of pony Mr Quartzite really is. He’s gotten… worse since he received your letter. He threw a filing cabinet out the Twilight-damned window! He has a deep, terrible rage inside of him anger issues, and I fear you have only provoked him. It is in my personal opinion that you should lock your doors and windows place Mr Quartzite on administrative leave. For the love of Twilight! He’s putting all of us in danger! He just needs some time to cool off. Please! We don’t have another coffee machine after he threw that out the window too! In his absence, I suggest placing his secretary, Sparrow Shell, in charge. 

Please do something, anything! Please reply soon, 

Seer Songbird.







Incident Response: 032A
To: Parliament Member For The Party Of Equestrian Youth Safety, Scootaloo
Re: Site 001: Everfree


Scootaloo, by now I’m sure you have heard of Incident 032A, and how it concerns both of us. I swear on Celestia’s holy name, if this is a prank on your part, it’s not celestia-damned funny! Oh, and by the way, I tried to arrange an appointment with you, but your boyfriend secretary Honey Tongue told me to go to Tartarus. You should really consider dumping him hiring new help. This letter probably isn’t even going to make it to you, which is another reason you should break up with Honey. In your responding letter to me, which I am expecting, please confirm that this huge pile of crap incident is not a prank. 

From your fellow Crusader, 

Applebloom







To: that damnable mare Applebloom
Re: your letter


I cannot believe you. Replacing me with that fool down in hiring? What was her name again? Sing Song? Whatever. I should fire her just to SPITE you. I hate your guts, Applebloom. This whole debacle is NOT MY FAULT BUT YOURS! YOU WERE THE ONE TO GIVE ME THAT STUPID ORDER! DIVERSITY SCHMIVERSITY APPLEDUMB! I regret to be informed of my BUCKING ADMINISTRATIVE LEAVE ARE YOU INSANE?! THIS CAMP NEEDS ME! administrative leave. Thank you for the notice three days in advance. BUCK YOU. BUCK YOU AND EVERYTHING YOU STAND FOR! I WILL CURSE YOU WITH ALL OF MY GLORIOUS UNICORN MIGHT, FEEBLE EARTH IDIOT!


Citric Quartzite







To: Seer Songbird
Re: Citric Quartzite


Seer, you have proven invaluable to me in my investigation into this incident. I understand that you have recommended one Sparrow Shell for the position of Director in the absence of Citric, but I must disagree. You are the perfect fit for this job, Seer, and you should damn well know it. What was that Tartarus-spawned stallion doing with you as hiring manager, anyways?! Your status as informant to me in the time leading up to this letter has painted you in a good light to my co-workers, too, and I’m sure they agree with me when I say this: you are just what we need for this job. Thank you for your co-operation, and I hope to see you benefitting from your hopefully not temprorary role.

Faithfully, 

Applebloom







Incident Response: 032A
To: High Soprano of The Royal Court, and Co-Founder of The Crusader Magazine, Sweetie Belle
Re: Site 001: Everfree


Dear Sweetie Belle,
I know you have your hooves full at the moment, but Scootaloo isn’t returning my letters, and I don’t know who else I can talk to. There’s been an incident. Out in the Everfree forest. You remember the Cutie Mark Day Camp we used to run there? Those were simpler times for all of us. You surely know how the day camp’s turned into ‘The Everfree Cutie Mark Camp’, and how we’ve got new faces running the joint. Two of the beings formerly employed there- I’m sorry Sweetie. I know you have a full schedule, what with being a newlywed, getting your mag off the ground, and singing in the court o’ the Princess and all… but if you get time, send me a letter. Please. I’ve had to deal with thirty-one different incidents so far, and this one’s gonna be the straw that breaks the camel’s back, so to speak. Send me a letter, Sweetie. I need somepony to talk to.


Applebloom