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// (30) Bad Dreams 
// Story: Wish Fulfillment (Legacy Version) 
// by Boopy Doopy 
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It was more than just a few letters that were written. We basically copied and pasted one letter twenty five times over a bunch of sheets of paper so we could make sure our reach was widespread. We made one for each of the friends we could think of that could possibly come to Equestria, with the plan of mailing them all out to Ponyville to see if anyone responded. It was such a long shot, but as good of a plan as we could come up with right away. If no one responded, we would do this again in a few months to see if anyone picked up.
I made two special letters in my own time though. One was to Twilight, requesting her to come to the Crystal Empire to see me and see if she could fix me. I made sure to play up the science aspect of it, wanting to attract her attention as much as possible to win her over, and explained in it how bad I was hurting because of it. Then I copied the letter to mail out to one of our friends, Beating Heart, so she could hand it to Twilight directly, just in case the Princess of Friendship didn’t take letters. I explained to her to tell her that I was suffering when they did, but remained vague on the details in the letter being sent to Beating Heart. I felt terribly insecure about going into detail about what happened, and trusted Beating Heart not to look or ask questions about it if I asked her not to.
After that, there was nothing to do but wait and hope something would come back. I had a little bit of optimism that something would come back– it had to have been getting close to a month since we’d first gotten here– and felt a little bit better once we were all done and my hoof was aching from all the writing. It felt like stuff was actually getting done. Shorey and I had a plan to help with what I knew was depression, we were working on getting into contact with Twilight directly, we had jobs and were saving up to head to Ponyville, and had a meeting scheduled with Cadance within a year. Things were getting done slowly but surely. I just had to keep my head down and power through and I’d be there again.
We mailed out everything the next day, directly before we went into work. Thankfully, it cost no money to mail things in the Crystal Empire, and even better we were told it would probably take around five days to get to Ponyville. That meant probably a week and a half before a response. It would take time before I got to where I needed to be, but when I was there, I’d be better again.
One other thing I tried to do in the meantime was force myself to smile more. In theory, if I smiled more even if I was hurting, eventually I’d forget that I was forcing myself to smile. I couldn’t say it was working immediately, but I hoped it would help anyway, because I knew Moberly was right. Complaining about myself wasn’t going to fix anything, and in fact was just gonna bring my friends down.
“You know, I think exercising is helping,” Shorey said as I flopped onto my stomach after we got done running halfway through the week. “I know it’s only been two sessions, but I think this is helping a lot already. You seem like you’re feeling a lot better than you were when we first got here.”
“I think so, too,” I agreed, genuinely believing it. “I mean, dysphoria is still there obviously, and I’m still having nightmares. But I think exercising off stress is really working for me, at least a little bit.”
“Wait, you’re having nightmares?” she asked, sounding surprised. I nodded, and she continued, “How long have you been having them?”
“Since that whole incident with those guards… I mean, the guards in the jail. But it’s not a big deal. They’ll go away eventually.” Eventually was probably going to be a good six months, just like the last time something traumatic happened to me, but I kept that thought to myself.
“Why didn’t you tell me you were having nightmares?” she asked. 
“Because it’s not a big deal,” I told her. “I don’t want to bother you about it. I know I was insufferable for the last few weeks, and I don’t want to keep being that way.”
“You can talk to me. You wouldn’t be bothering me telling me about your problems.”
I avoided sighing and rolling my eyes at the assertion. I knew that was objectively not true. I knew she didn’t like hearing about it because she’d shown as much before. I would complain, and then she would pretend not to be annoyed and get frustrated and act rude, and then we’d fight. Again. That wasn’t something I wanted to let happen for what had to be about the tenth time by now.
“I’m fine, Shorey,” I said. “I’ll let you know if I’m feeling terrible or having particularly bad nightmares.” She looked like she was ready to cry at just the thought that I was hurting, but kept her composure. Instead, she nodded and headed for the shower to wash the sweat gathered from running off.
It was that very night that I had nightmares. This one was a particularly awful dream about me getting to Ponyville and meeting Twilight, only for her to turn me into a human male. It followed with all of my friends telling me that it was the way I was born to be before I woke up, the tears in my eyes. I tried not to cry, knowing that Shorey would probably wake up if I did, but I couldn’t help it. It was the worst dream I’d had in a long while. Crying at least made me feel a little bit better since I had a hard time doing that these days.
Just as I expected, my crying woke up Shorey. She made her way into the living room in front of where I was sleeping, looking extremely tired. She had bags under her eyes and a sad look on her face as she stared down at me.
“Having nightmares?” she asked, certainly already knowing the answer.
“Yeah, but I’m fine,” I lied. “I didn’t mean to wake you up. I’m sorry.”
She looked down at me sadly for a long moment with those piercing gray eyes before asking, “How often are they happening?”
“Every few days it feels like,” I whispered. “It’s not fun.”
“I’m sorry,” she whispered back sadly. There was another long moment that passed before she asked, “Did you want to spend the night in bed with me?”
It was the last question I ever expected to hear from her. Somehow, I had it in my head that she didn’t really like me, even though that wasn’t how she operated. It made sense that she asked though. I was having nightmares, and my crying was keeping her from getting sleep.
“It’s fine,” I said shyly. “I don’t want to keep you awake with my breathing and stuff, or wake you up again if I have more bad dreams.”
“I’m already awake, and if I can help you sleep better, then that’s going to help me. It’s not any trouble.”
I sniffled and turned away. There she was, being the nicest, kindest person of all time like she always was. It made my heart melt to think about, as well as feel bad that she was going out of her way for me.
“Yes, please,” I said, half whispering. “That would be nice.”
She gave me a little smile before extending her hoof to help me get up off the ground. I followed carefully, stepping over Moberly and heading into the bedroom, climbing into bed after her. She layed on her side so she could have her back pressed against mine like it was in the sleeping bag. I could feel her back moving as she breathed rhythmically in a nice, comforting motion. Her fur pressed against mine a bit as she used a hoof to rub my side. It made me feel a lot better.
She really does care… but is that a surprise? When has she ever shown to not care? When arguments start, it’s because you’re the one acting like an idiot, not her not caring.
“Thank you for being here,” I said tiredly. “You make this all a lot more bearable. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
“I should be thanking you,” she replied. “You’re the reason I’m here at all.” She sighed and continued, “I’m so glad I can be myself.”
“Next paycheck, we’re buying dresses,” I told her. “We’re gonna build up a collection for you. One for each day of the year, plus that tan one for me.”
“Haha, maybe,” she giggled. “Let’s get to sleep now though. I don’t wanna be up all night.”
“Okay. One more thing though– do you think we could try and go on a date again this weekend? I’m sorry my mood messed up our last attempt.”
“It’s fine, and that sounds nice. I saw a flier somewhere about a play being put on soon. We could go to that.”
I smiled and sniffled a little bit at that, hanging on to the moment with her. “Thank you again for being here,” I said as I closed my eyes. “I love you, Shorey.”
“I love you too, Rally,” she said as she closed her eyes, both of us drifting off to sleep. My nightmares didn’t continue, Shorey’s presence banishing them.