//------------------------------// // Chapter 4 // Story: Not What You'd Expect... // by Some Leech //------------------------------// While Leech hadn’t truly intended to stay in the derelict cottage they’d stumbled across, Kennel had convinced her that using the structure wasn’t a bad idea whatsoever. For starters, the building afforded them shelter and wasn’t that dilapidated - secondly, since they’d had no idea where they’d ended up, their secluded refuge allowed them to stay well-away from prying eyes. Unfortunately, with their limited supplies and a need to establish their location, they eventually had to venture into the wide, possibly alien world. It was only after some protracted bickering that they’d settled on a plan - one which Leech reluctantly admitted was better than anything she would have come up with by herself. Exploring together, using the sun to navigate their direction, they wandered north for several hours then returned home; the following day, they repeated the process but headed east. It wasn’t until their fourth excursion, moving west, that they discovered anything of note. Cresting a small hill, with the trees thinning around them, they spotted a small village resting in a grassy valley. Relieved to have found civilization, even if it was nearly an hour’s hike from the cabin they’d claimed, they moved onto the next phase of Kennel’s scheme - gathering intel. Step one had been simple enough, cautiously meandering to and through the settlement to make passive observations - after that, once they’d determined the ponies who resided there seemed normal enough, they’d become a bit more bold. Had it been up to Leech, they would have taken the direct approach - chatting with townsponies and asking questions about their location and the world in general, however Kennel was much more cautious. The pegasus had argued that, for all they knew, the laws, history, and even society could be vastly different to anything they were experienced with - as such, it would be prudent to stay under everypony’s radar. Only begrudgingly conceding that her friend made a good point, the unicorn agreed to do some covert reconnaissance. Breaking from their routine of working as a team, the mares went through town to browse shops, eavesdrop on conversations, visit the local library, and surreptitiously learn of the world. Just because everything seemed unremarkable, with ponies going about their daily lives acting normally, that didn’t mean this version of Equestria didn’t have strange laws or customs. The last thing they needed was to go on the lam from scientists or the fuzz, so they had to make sure they didn’t unintentionally draw the wrong sort of attention. Mercifully, after several trips into the hamlet they’d learned was named Ponyville, they’d figured out that the land they’d landed in wasn’t all that different from their respective homes - well for the most part. Apparently this Equestria had suffered through a rather rough decade, dealing with various, apparently highly dangerous villains who’d threatened to upend the order of things in some form or fashion. Had it not been for a sextet of heroes and their friends acting as champions for the various creatures of Equus, the world at large, everything would have gone to Tartarus in a hoofbasket. With the more pressing surveillance concluded, having worked out that they wouldn’t be persecuted for doing anything they considered commonplace, their pursuits became a bit more focused. Having figured out she wasn’t in her homeland, and therefore didn’t have a house or job to return to, Kennel engrossed herself with research on the eldritch creature who’d flung them to what she determined was an alternate reality; Leech, on the other hoof, contentedly set to foraging and putting her efforts into sprucing up what she’d started calling their mansion. All in all, going without fear of persecution or immediate starvation, they were thankful things hadn’t ended up more poorly than they had - regrettably, things were far from perfect… ~ The sound of a catcall whistle caught Kennel’s ear, distracting her and nearly causing her to trip on a root protruding from the uneven forest floor. Though they’d managed to clear a crude path from the cabin, one which had existed prior to their arrival, the protracted hike to town and the disuse of the campsite made the journey a long and arduous one. Scowling and only just catching herself, she looked around in confusion until the noise repeated itself. “Well look at what the cat dragged in,” Leech called, waving from atop the lodge. Squinting up at the unicorn, seeing what looked like a small paddle in the mare’s hoof, Kennel frustration grew tinged with confusion. “What’re you doing up there?” “Fixing the - Fuck,” Leech blurted, nearly dropping her wooden spatula. “Fixing the roof! What the hell did you think I’ve been gathering all that pine pitch for?” The pegasus rolled her eyes and continued toward the front door. “Please don’t kill yourself on accident. I’d really rather not drag your mangled ass through the forest and to a clinic.” Continuing to slather the thick resin over the wooden shingles beneath her, the unicorn gave a dismissive shrug. “Wouldn’t be the first time I got hauled to a doctor and it probably wouldn’t be the last - anyways, you find anything good?” “No,” Kennel huffed, marching inside and out of sight. Leech peered over the side of the roof and knit her brow. As much as she would have liked to continue working, something told her that she should check on her friend. Over the last week or so, shortly after learning she didn’t have a home to return to, Kennel had been acting strangely. Looking over her shoulder at the spot she’d just shellacked, hoping it would fix one of the two leaks in the ceiling, she trotted over the far corner of the structure and awkwardly climbed onto a makeshift ramp she’d fashioned from felled timber and a discarded palate she’d found behind the dumpster of a bakery in town. “You know,” she began, trotting through the front door, “it might be my imagination, but you’ve been kinda - I dunno - grumpy lately.” “Hmmph -” Kennel grunted, glancing up from a book in her lap, “easy for you to say, you didn’t lose your house and all your shit by being sent here.” Undeterred, brushing off the slight, the unicorn sauntered over and seated herself next to the disgruntled pegasus. “Technically I did lose all my shit. My bag, all those snacks, and my favorite -” “You don’t get it!” Kennel snapped. “I had a life and a job, things I’d been working hard to get, and now they’re all gone - gone!” As she tried and failed to maintain her composure, Leech’s lip curled. “Hey, it’s not my fault this shit happened! I know this ain’t exactly ideal for you, but we’re in the same crappy situation.” “That’s just it, we’re in the same situation! What the hell am I supposed to do if you hurt yourself or, abyss forbid, one of us gets sick out here? We don’t have any bits, we’re barely scraping by with food, and there’s no way I’m going to try to open another portal - not knowing that thing may be waiting for us!” she barked, leering over at her friend. As impressed as she was with the unicorn’s odd assortment of skills, the mare’s eccentricities and frankly reckless behavior had been wearing her nerves thin. It had been hard enough to stop her companion from merely trotting into Ponyville to grill random passersby about random topics, but things had only become more concerning since then. She’d be the first to admit she was far from an survivalist, but fucking about alone in the woods, trying to cobble together tools from literal junk, and scrounging through garbage couldn’t be as safe as her companion made it out to be. For one of the few times in her life, she didn’t know what to do. While they weren’t in any immediate danger, it sure as hell felt like they were directionless. As happy as she was to have the meager provisions they had, not to mention the roof over their head, there was no long term plan - no end game of what they should be working toward. Fueled by frustration that was in no small part driven by her foolhardy roommate, she locked eyes with the mare seated next to her. Leech glared at the pegasus, a scathing rebuttal forming on her lips, but she kept her mouth closed. Despite having led a life far departed from her companion, a small sliver of her could sympathize with the mare’s plight. She hadn’t had much ripped away from her, but Kennel apparently had. Lifting a forehoof and pinching the bridge of her snout, she conceded the staring contest. “I’m sorry ~ ok?” she sighed, shaking her head. “I’ll try to be a little more careful, but you should trust me more - I mean, it ain’t like I’ve had folks looking after me before…” Kennel’s ire faded, if only slightly, as she closed her eyes and massaged her temple. She’d only known Leech for a relatively short time, yet her gut told her that the unicorn’s promise wouldn’t last for too terribly long. A lifetime of self-reliance had been ingrained in the mare, so breaking it on a whim would be no easy task - unless… Getting to her hooves, placing her book beside herself, she trotted to the door. “Come on…” Peeking out, seeing the pegasus by the door, Leech cocked her head. “Come on what? You wanting to make another trip today?” “No, we’re just not doing it inside,” Kennel answered, trotting into the overgrown front yard and away from the house. “We’re going to need some space for this.” “For what?” the unicorn pressed, cantering after her. “For you me teaching you how to use that bony can opener sticking out of that thick skull of yours,” Kennel grunted, glancing back at the unicorn. Leech stopped in her tracks, staring in disbelief at her friend. She may not have been as well-read or scholarly as the pegasus, but even she could see a problem with the notion of being taught how to use magic. First and foremost, though she felt certain Kennel meant well, there was no possible way the mare could know what being a unicorn felt like - secondly, it wasn’t like she hadn’t tried to harness her arcane potential before. “And how are you gonna do this, great swami?” she groaned. “Baby steps,” Kennel smoothly replied, stopping just short of a small, relatively clear patch of land. “Alright, you gotta promise to take this seriously; no fucking around or trying to ham it up. Magic is a powerful tool that can -” “Yeah yeah yeah, I know,” Leech interrupted. “I might not be good at it myself, but I’ve seen the shit sorcery can do.” Stepping aside, giving her friend a bit of breathing room, Kennel pursed her lips. Despite being a pegasus, she’d done more than her fair share of research of the arcane - hell, if she was being honest, she may know more about how magic worked than most unicorns. Unlike most inherent users of sorcery, who wielded mystic power like one might use a limb, she’d had to craft tools to perform even simple tasks - something she took no small amount of pride in. While she’d never anticipated using her knowledge to teach, their less than stellar situation demanded they use every tool they had available, including the pointy one on Leech’s crown, but she’d need to pace herself. Before she could do anything, she’d need to gauge her friend’s talents or lack thereof. Clearing her throat and standing straight, she did her best to act like she knew what she was doing. “Ok, step one, show me what you can do,” she instructed, waving at the vacant area before them. Leech stood motionless and blinked, a cool breeze dancing over her hide, before she stifled a giggle. “Seriously? You seriously want to see what I can do?” Nodding firmly, Kennel stood unmoving. “Yes. If you can’t do anything, that’s fine.” “Well,” the unicorn grunted, stooping down and lifting a dried leaf from the forest floor, “I can sometimes make a spark with it. Fuck if I know why this damn thing only works every so often,” she added, reaching up and brushing her horn, “but it seems broken more often than not.” “Try to set that on fire,” Kennel insisted, “and explain the process while you’re doing it.” Holding the small leaf by its stem, Leech closed her eyes. “I’m - uh - picturing it getting hot - like it’s getting crispy and smoldering.” Kennel watched closely, her eyes shifting between the mare’s face and horn. Seconds passed, the unicorn’s face contorted with strain, and only a faint, perilously brief amethyst glow appeared around the bony protrusion. It was worse than she thought, but not nearly as bad as it could have been. Though it had lasted no longer than a fraction of a second, the flicker of magic told her that there was hope. “You have to relax,” she murmured, inching closer to her friend. “Magic isn’t like your muscles or physical strength. Take a deep breath in, hold it for a second, then slowly exhale.” “Here we go with the hippy-dippy bullshit,” Leech muttered under her breath. “It’s magic - it ain’t like I’m giving birth or - Ack!” She dropped the leaf and leapt away, as something pressed against her side. Seeing the pegasus beside her, looking just as startled as she was, she snorted. “What the hell?” “I was trying to rub your shoulder. Seriously, you need to pull that stick out of your ass and just breathe!” Kennel coolly noted. “Here, sit down and I’ll give you a little massage while you try again.” Leech’s jaw flapped for a second, taken completely off guard by the offer. “You’re fucking with me ~ right?” “Not in the slightest,” the pegasus remarked. Keeping her mouth shut, Leech begrudgingly eased herself down to her haunches, closed her eyes, and forced herself to take several slow, steady breaths. She wasn’t about to say it, but the whole exercise seemed like an exercise in futility and flew in the face of how the world worked. Honestly, did anything ever get done that didn’t require a bit of effort and strain? As a pair of hooves pressed to her upper back, causing her to flinch, she fumbled around to find another leaf. “There we go,” Kennel whispered, “just imagine coaxing the fire into being - like you’re asking it to happen.” “You do realize how stupid this sounds ~ don’t you?” the unicorn sarcastically inquired. Fighting the urge to give a glib rebuttal, Kennel focused her efforts into working the kinks out of the mare’s shoulders. From her understanding, regardless of who or what was harnessing it, nearly all magical power worked the same way. If a creature had the proper equipment, be it an inherent biological one or an artificial one, all they had to do was focus and channel their inner energy to accomplish a goal - sure, some may have more natural talent than others, but anypony with enough determination and patience should be able to pull off a few simple spells. Seconds turned into minutes, with the tranquil sounds of woodland birds and the wind filling their ears, as they remained in place. If Leech really had been able to ignite something in the past, even on a single occasion, she should have been able to repeat the process - sadly, even with her impromptu massage, the mare only seemed to get increasingly stressed. Shifting and pushing herself up, letting the leaf fall to the ground, the unicorn stood and petulantly grunted. “I think I figured it out,” she began, turning to face the pegasus. “I’m gonna trot into town, find some lonely soul who wants to blow off some steam, then come back with a pack of matches and some pizza - that way we can have dinner and I can burn as many leaves as you want.” “You have to be patient,” Kennel exasperatedly sighed. “It’s not like anypony was born and instantly knew how to do this kind of thing! Once you get the hang of it, I bet you’ll actually be pretty good at using your horn.” “I’m pretty good at giving stallions a good time, not dying in ditches, and finding the best cuisine in dumpsters, but that’s about it,” Leech snickered. “As much as I appreciate you trying to help, I don’t see this going anywhere anytime soon.” As the unicorn turned and walked away, heading in the direction of the sleepy hamlet in the valley, Kennel’s mind raced. It wasn’t like she was opposed to her companion wandering off and coming back with food, but she wasn’t about to throw in the towel on something they’d just started. Thinking fast, struck by inspiration, she snatched up a twig and cantered to and in front of the retreating mare. “If you can set this on fire, I’ll finish the roof and cook us dinner tonight,” she chirped. Cocking a brow, Leech altered her course and trotted past the pegasus. “Pass. Some fresh pizza and a lay would be better than another dandelion salad and pickles.” “But,” Kennel hastily interjected, “what if I come with you and we do another magic act to make a few bits? The last few times I was in town I saw plenty of fillies and colts around - fillies and colts who’s parents might toss us a few bits.” The unicorn slowed and looked back at her, a look of consternation on her face. “And if I can’t burn the stupid leaf?” “Sausage,” she flatly stated, “with extra cheese. Just try to shower before you come back. I don’t mind sleeping with ya, but I’d rather not be smelling some big, probably out of shape stallion on you in bed.” Glowering and wheeling around, Leech held a hoof to her chest. “Believe it or not, I’m a whore with standards - well, no, most of the time I have standards. But sure, fuck it - it’ll probably be a few hours until anypony is out looking for a good time anyways, so I’ll give it another go.” Seeing the unicorn grin and step closer, Kennel couldn’t help but smile. At worst, if the little trial didn’t work, they’d wind up with a hot meal and some matches - at best, they’d make the trek into the village, make a spectacle of themselves, and possibly make enough cash to get themselves something to eat. Thinking about it, weighing the two outcomes, she honestly wasn’t sure if one was better than the other - regardless, at least the exercise, banter, and potential excursion were proving to be an entertaining distraction. “Try to find your happy place,” she urged, holding the small twig before her friend’s horn. “Let your troubles fade away.” “Yeah, sure, like it’s that easy,” Leech blurted, screwing her eyes shut. “If I’m supposed to be relaxed for this shit, maybe we should try after I’ve had a roll in the hay.” Stars above, if the pegasus was serious about being loosened up to use sorcery, maybe her glib comment wasn’t that far off. It wasn’t like she stooped to Equestria’s oldest profession regularly, nor was she particularly proud of selling herself, but she’d be lying if she said it wasn’t a pleasant way to unwind and make some dough. With her thoughts wandering into lecherous waters, wondering if she’d get lucky and find a cute stallion, something soft brushed her cheek. Cracking one eye, seeing Kennel smiling over at herself, she held her breath. Given all the wild goings on and bizarre circumstances, she’d like to say she’d been getting along well with the mare after they’d crossed paths - nevertheless, since things had only just started to slow down over the last few days, she hadn’t really taken the time to appreciate her newfound companion. In spite of the insanity they’d gone through, as she peered into the pegasus’ eyes, she found herself thankful that they’d met. “Shit,” Kennel hissed, shattering the moment and shaking her hoof. “What’s…” Leech trailed off, looking down and seeing an ember on the slender twig’s base. “Bull fucking shit - you did that!” “Yeah, I totally lit it somehow, while you were looking right at me, and burned my hoof just for fun,” Kennel countered, sucking the tip of her forehoof. “But you know what this means?” “That - uh -” the unicorn faltered. “That you gotta take a hike with me and hope we can find some burn cream?” She knew good and damned what the development meant, but that didn’t mean she believed it. Somehow, after only a few minutes’ worth of trying, she’d managed to harness her power to actually do something - all because of the weird little pegasus who’d all but literally plopped into her lap. As she lifted her gaze from the smoking bit of wood, beaming from ear to ear, she found herself pulled into a hug. Kennel couldn’t be more bothered by the small singe on her hoof or that she’d be spending the better part of two hours on her hooves - after all, they were small prices to pay for such an uplifting development. Truth be told, she hadn’t expected much from the little experiment, merely hoping to set the stage for further lessons, yet things had shaped up remarkably well. Now that her friend had made a spark, even though it was too small to properly ignite anything, she’d gotten a baseline of the unicorn’s arcane skill. “Considering we’ve only got a few hours of light left, we might want to head out,” she hummed, releasing her friend and backing away. Turning and trotting away, headed toward the tried and true path they’d been using, Leech smirked over her shoulder. “Even if we end up coming home in the dark, we don’t have much to worry about. With these little bad-girls,” she tittered, shooting the mare a wink, “I think we’ll be able to make it back in one piece.” Moving at a brisk pace, once her friend had caught up with her, she started the long, relaxed journey to Ponyville. Though the shack they’d claimed was far from perfect, with a litany of things to repair or improve, its location suited her needs perfectly. So long as nopony showed up and demanded they leave, she could see herself clearing out a plot of land by it, starting a garden, and living a quaint, reclusive life - still, her grand machinations aside, she was curious about something. “You mind if I ask you something?” she inquired, glancing over at the pegasus. Still smirking to herself, Kennel met her gaze. “Shoot.” “So if you can’t head home, your home, what are you going to do with yourself?” Leech asked. Bringing her attention back to the path, lest she accidentally trip on a root or partially buried rock, Kennel gave herself a moment to think. “Honestly, I have no idea. I’ll probably need to get a job somewhere, get my hooves under myself, and start building my life again. How about yourself?” “If we can keep that cabin, I might actually settle down - you know, try my hoof at staying in one place for a while. Maybe I’ll like setting down roots, maybe I’ll hate it and go back on the road - either way, I figure it might be worth a shot,” the unicorn mused. “It’s not like I’ve checked, but you could probably land some work in town if you started beating the bushes. I’ll stay home and be your trophy wife” Kennel guffawed at the remark, unable to contain her mirth. “Oh of course! My little slutty wife, safe and secure at the homestead, waiting for her hard-working wife to come home! I can imagine it now, you’d probably prancing around in an apron while making me dinner and tending to the chickens out back, wistfully fantasizing about all the ways you can keep me happy - yeah, that’d be fucking rich.” “Ok, see, you think this shit’s funny, but I could totally pull off the homemaker thing - in fact, I think it’s fair to say that I’d be quite the catch for somepony! How many mares do you know who can build a shed out of scrap lumber or make soap from scratch?” Leech shot back, flashing her fangs. “That’s fair, but I only need one hoof to count the number of mares I know who eat out of dumpsters or can get by squatting under a bridge,” Kennel smugly noted. Slowing only slightly, Leech gasped. “I would not eat out of a dumpster! I’d take the food out, brush it off, then put it on a plate before I eat it!” Kennel threw her weight to the side and lightly body-checked the unicorn. “Well you’d better hope the townsponies are pretty wasteful with food. With as far of a walk as this is, you’re gonna burn more calories than you eat and risk losing that juicy flank you’ve somehow managed to keep!” “If you’re trying to keep pounds on while on the streets, haunt bakeries and grocery stores; the amount of cakes and cookies those places end up tossing is galling!” Leech griped. “You know those big displays of pastries in those places?” “Yeah,” the pegasus answered, “what about them?” “As crazy as it sounds, most places will toss that stuff before they close for the night,” Leech huffed. Shaking her head and closing her eyes, Kennel snorted in frustration. “That’s so wasteful!” “Some places donate the stuff to shelters the day afterward, instead of tossing it in the trash, but most just don’t give a shit,” the unicorn murmured, her smile fading slightly. “Point being, if you’re going to be a hobo, it doesn’t hurt to have a bit of a sweet tooth.” “Not to draw out the subject, but do you want to hit up that little bakery in town? If we can scrape up enough bits, maybe we could get something to celebrate,” Kennel mentioned. Piquing a brow, Leech looked over. “Celebrate what? Being dumped here after fucking with some crazy-ass magic?” “More like celebrate that we’re not dead and not currently homeless,” the pegasus snickered. “Fair point,” Leech admitted. Their unfocused banter, wandering from topics of dating and foraging to mysticism and grand aspirations of sorcery, made the trek a short and pleasant one. In no time at all, they were moving through the settlement and to the town square, having settled on a family friendly act which would hopefully net them enough bits for a meal and, if they were lucky, a dessert to cap off the evening. As they slowed before the town hall, with a decent number of residents out and about, they silently began their busking. While they didn’t have any instruments or particularly unique tricks up their nonexistent sleeves, Kennel’s grasp of natural magic and Leech’s penchant for showmareship proved to be a winning combo. As the pegasus grew a small assortment of flowers around them, drawing in a number of spectators in and of itself, the unicorn plucked the blossoming, colorful plants to sell to those attending the show. It may have been a simple display, but it worked magnificently; by the time they were finished up, with the sun already dipping over the horizon, they’d made enough for dinner and sweet with some left to spare. Having given the few flowers to a group of school fillies who’d caught the final minutes of their show, Kennel faced her friend. “I gotta admit, we make a pretty good team.” “Damn right we do!” Leech chirped, extending a foreleg and swiftly receiving a hoof-bump. “Let’s go get some grub and head back home. Not that I mind being out, but all the pandering and housework from earlier has me bushed.” Biting back a yawn, Kennel nodded. “I’m right there with ya. Horn or no horn, cranking out carnations like that can really take it out of a mare.” “Screw it, we can get pizza later,” the unicorn flippantly asserted, spotting the familiar sign of a Hayburger less than a block away. “Takeout will be cheaper and faster - plus they make some damn good sweet potato fries.” Leading the way, the pegasus waved with a wing. “Sounds good to me.” Generally speaking, aside from the minor frustration at the cabin earlier, the day had been a good one. They’d made some cash, Leech had apparently fixed part of the roof, and she had enough reading material to keep her occupied for the better part of a week! If things kept going the way they’d been going, she suspected their situation would only continue to improve, but that was a relatively big if. Strolling down the sidewalk and to the restaurant’s front door, she saw herself in, looked toward the register, and did an abrupt about face. “What the - Mmmph?!” Leech’s protest was cut short, as the pegasus jammed a wing over her muzzle. “Don’t make a scene,” Kennel hissed in the mare’s ear. “Just turn around and act casual…” With the feathery appendage slipping from her face, instinctively turning away from the closing door, Leech noticed what had her friend so out of sorts. Standing by one another, making an order at the front counter, lingered a pink earth pony mare and an all too familiar figure wearing a crimson scarf. Appearing like a mirrored image of Kennel, albeit as a stallion, the pegasus was the last pony she’d hoped to run into - or so she thought. Reaching around and pawing at Kennel’s retreating behind, she scrunched her snout. “Wait! We should watch them for a bit!” Kennel wheeled around and pulled the unicorn away, only glancing back to ensure they hadn’t been seen. “Why does this keep happening? Can’t I go at least a month without weird shit going on?” Wriggling free from her companion, Leech grimaced. “We should figure out who they are! If there’s even a small chance that they can help us, it’s worth the risk!” “And what if it makes the universe implode ~ what then?” Kennel retorted, stopping to face her friend. “It’s not like we know what happens when -” “Um - excuse me?” a voice called, causing both the mares to turn. Having walked out of the eatery, with his associate lingering just behind him, the stallionly doppelganger uneasily locked eyes with Kennel. “Do I know you…?”