//------------------------------//
// Chapter Four: Isn't It Great To Be Different? 
// Story: Isn't it Great to be Different? 
// by BronyDerp117 
//------------------------------//


Chapter Four
(Disclaimer: The song lyrics on this Chapter belong to Forest Rain, not myself. He has given me permission to use his lyrics.)



To this day, that note is stained from the tears I shed. I sobbed deeply after reading that. It made me realize that I have beaten myself up, contemplated suicide, blamed myself for things I did not cause, and tried to change who I was so I could be accepted. I never stopped to think: what if it wasn't my fault? What if I actually did end my short life? What if I just tried to be myself? 

Those simple words from that little note lingered in my mind, and not the subtle kind of lingering. It was the kind of lingering that refuses to leave your head, like an annoying yet catchy song, except these words were anything but annoying. It was like a fire had just been started inside me -- no, not a fire, that represents anger too much. It was more like a water stream within myself with a strong current, but cut off at the top of a waterfall, preventing the natural passionate flowing. But after I read that note, it was like the barrier was removed, like the waterfall within myself flowed, spreading throughout my entire being, down to the deepest reaches of myself that I didn't even know existed.

Inspiration slowly wormed its way into my mind as I immediately picked up my old guitar and got to work. I spent hours writing these lyrics. When I finally finished the beginning, I started strumming that old guitar, playing some gentle and soothing chords, and sang what I had written so far. 

"It was a dark day when I lost my faith
I wasn't the pony I thought I'd be
And it seemed that no one could relate
There was nothing left for me to see
So I took a walk to the edge of the town
And thought of leaving it all behind
When I saw a little letter fall right out of the sky
As a grey mare hovered way up high
I thought I was crazy when I saw her wave
And then simply fly away
So I opened the letter and looked inside
And what was written made my day...
It said--"

As I began to sing the chorus, I heard a voice from behind me sing along with me. Her voice was familiar, as it was soft and beautiful, but also a bit bubbly.There was a very slight rasp to her voice as she sang the chorus with me.

"Isn't it great to be different?
Isn't it wonderful to be exactly who you are?
When you learn to start accepting yourself
You'll become a shining star"

When I finished singing, I put my guitar down and turned around, and my eyes met her's. Those golden eyes. Those beautiful, deadly eyes. My eyes widened when I saw her leaning against the frame of my doorway. She was smiling widely at me. She then did something I did not expect at all. She took off her glasses, and her eyes slowly went crossed, turning into a wall-eyed stare. I realized just why she wrote that note now. Not only were her eyes the most unique eye color I had ever seen, but she was cross-eyed without glasses. She must of gotten tormented in school. Maybe that's where the name "Derpy" came from. Derpy, to the best of her abilities, looked at me and said, "I heard you play and sing before, and I heard a sadness and guilt in your voice that I just couldn't bear. I just wanted to tell you that the hardest thing I faced was not the teasing or the pain, it was convincing myself that I wasn't stupid, strange, or imperfect. And helping others do the same."

Her words... they changed me. At the time I didn't know it, but those words changed me forever. Tears welled up in my forest green eyes, and the little salty drops of tears began to silently roll down my cheeks as I smiled gratefully at the only pony to believe in me for almost a year. A year of sadness and depression. A year of blaming myself. A year of guilt. A year of shattered love. But this mare that I barely knew showed me a kindness that only the closest of friends would exchange. This pony did something only one mare had ever done before; she opened the window of the dark room in my heart.

"Shall we finish this song?" She teased me with a smug grin. I returned the smile and mumbled a "sure," then we started writing the song. We spent hours on it. Writing it, playing out the guitar, getting the rhythm perfect, setting the drums to a perfect beat, and getting the volume levels right. Once we finally finished, we recorded the song on my recording device and played it back. It sounded amazing. We both looked at each other and smiled. Her aureate eyes were so inviting, so comforting, and so loving. Before I knew it, I found that our lips were gently pressed together. I closed my eyes and savored the warmth spreading throughout my body. I hadn't felt this warmth, this pure happiness, in almost a year. And I didn't feel guilty either. I felt like, if Shining Star was looking at me right now, she was grinning contently at me. Derpy and I pulled away from each other after a very long moment, and we simply grinned at each other. She laid her head on my shoulder as she sat in a chair next to me, as I quickly printed out a few dozen records. I laid my head back, and made sure Derpy didn't wake. I whispered, "Thank you," quietly. However, she wasn't asleep.

"No problem at all." She looked up at me with her big eyes and a gentle grin.

I returned the gesture. "I can see why you go by Derpy," I said to her.

She chuckled and replied, "Yup, it's what my friends used to call me in high school."

Puzzled, I asked her, "And you don't find it offensive?"

She shot a warm smile at me as she raised up her head, and replied, "Not anymore."

I nodded and laid my head back against my chair. I felt Derpy lay her head on my shoulder once again, and we both drifted off to a deep sleep. And for the first time in a year, there was a flicker of light in my life again.