"What the fuck?!" I sat up, gasping for air and looking around the room as frantically as a fly trying to avoid getting swatted. It took a few moments but I finally breathed a sigh of relief when I realised something.
"It was just a fucking dream. What in...I need serious help." Yes, it was in fact a dream. I was being attacked by several fortune cookies that sprouted spider legs. Thought I was being attacked by the deadly and annoying bug queen huh? Nope. Not yet anyway. Actually, as I looked to my side, I realised that she was still knocked out on the bed next to me.
Wait, next to...
I jumped up quickly, shoving the covers off of me. I must have fell asleep somehow. Jesus Christ, what did I do to deserve any of this? I was a normal (well, that was debatable) human being who just wanted to improve his high score on a video game and pizza! Was that too much to ask?
Don't answer that.
I rubbed the back of my head and audibly sighed to myself. How was I even going to get back? If I could, how long would it take? Weeks? Months? Years? Man, this was too much for me right now. My brain still needed to process all of this. I sat on the windowsill and looked outside, looking at the now brightly lit sun. Fuck, how long did I pass out for?
"Ugh....What...."
I almost didn't notice that. It was basically a whisper. I turned my head around and saw guess who? Good old sleeping beauty waking up from her impromptu kip. She turned her head towards me and I quickly saw the anger in her eyes, just like earlier. I quickly tried to defuse the situation. Didn't want a repeat of earlier, especially considering that the guards weren't here right now.
Actually, where were they now that I come to think of it? Oh wait, that's right. They got slapped around by this oversized bug. Suppose they're still recovering.
Pussies.
I slowly got off of the windowsill and raised my hands slightly. "Yo, calm down. We should probably talk. You need answers as much as I do, clearly."
Chrysalis (yes, I still remember her name) looked at me for a second before huffing, sitting up on the bed. "Yes...I suppose you're at least right with that statement, monkey. Now tell me, what happened exactly?"
I walked over slowly, making sure to make it obvious that I wasn't going to jump her. Not like that'd do any good after what had already happened but still...yeah no, not taking any chances.
"First of all, I'm not a monkey. Let's get that straight. Second, I'll tell you. Bit of an earful so you may want to stay sat down."
And so we talked. The lord of the bugs was expectedly hostile for the first few minutes but after I explained everything, she calmed down slightly. Yes, slightly. I could still see that she was angry. Suppose I couldn't blame her. She comes across a weird alien in a shitty forest filled with freak of nature abominations and then proceeds to faint, wake up with someone she clearly doesn't like and then pass out again. I think at that point, I'd be smashing a window.
After I'd finished and said my piece, she looked around the room before looking back at me with her creepy but weirdly cool slit eyes. Reminded me of a cat's, despite her being a bug.
"A fool like you saved me? In the name of the hive, what is happening to me..."
I rolled my eyes and looked away for a moment. This braud had a giant ego and I'm not sure if I could deal with it much longer if she kept it up. "Look, I didn't really expect any of this either but here we are. Now, you want to tell me your side of why you hate Celestia so much? Maybe if you told me I could actually get a bit of a grasp as to why you seem so hateful."
She snarled at me, making me back off slightly. She grumbled, looking at the door. "Fine. You want to know why, human?"
I nodded. I noticed that she finally said human instead of ape or monkey. That was refreshing I guess. Still not my actual name but just like the guards earlier, it'll do for now. She sighed and continued.
"My changelings were dying. We didn't feed for months upon months. I tried to make deals and peace treaty's with the ponies and with other races. None would accept. Alas, I was forced to try and take it by force. We would have succeeded if it wasn't for that unbearable Twilight Sparkle getting in the way of my plans."
I knew it. I knew that there would be a 2nd side to this story. Who was this "twilight sparkle" that she mentioned? Probably one of Celestia's followers, I imagine. Eh well. I'd come back to that name later.
I didn't really trust anyone here considering I was fresh meat and a completely unknown creature in this land but hearing that made me trust these ponies even less, especially Celestia. Granted I didn't trust ye old bugster here but I didn't get the feeling that she was lying to me. Like with Celestia yesterday, I didn't sense an ounce of mistruth at all in her statement. Even if Celestia hadn't told me the full story, she wasn't lying about what she said (at least it didn't seem like she was to me). She did however keep things from me what Chrysalis here just told me and while I understand, being a stranger and all, I didn't like this. Not one bit. Bug lord here seemed like she was just trying to save her race and even if a straight up invasion wasn't the right answer, I could fully understand why. Humans would 100% do the same if we were in the same situation. That's if either of them were really telling the truth. Even if I had an inkling for that type of thing, both of them could just be very fucking good liers and laughing at me behind my back.
Gotta love those trust issues, am I right?
I'd find out sooner or later regardless anyway. For now, I looked at her and gave an affirmative nod. "To be honest, I understand you. I completely do understand where you're coming from and I don't blame you for doing what you did."
She hissed and looked at me dead in the eyes. "LISTEN APE! I....wait...what did you say?"
The outburst threw me off a bit but I figured that she just expected me to put her down for what she did. Maybe that's what Celestia and the others did? Shun her for her actions despite her situation. It would explain why she's so angry.
"I said that I understand where you're coming from. You did what you had to do to try and ensure your race's survival. Was an invasion the best course of action from a moral stance? No, of course not. But it makes sense why you went that route. You had no other choice, at least by the sounds of it. My race would have done the same 100 times over if we were in the same predicament."
I think it took a moment to register what I'd just said because she looked away for a moment and then looked back at me with an almost shocked expression. "No one has ever actually understood me in that way." I saw an inkling of a tiny smile before she reverted back to her smug I don't take shit from anyone expression. "Hm. Quite funny how even a hairless monkey like yourself seems to have a more realistic outlook on the situation than anyone else. Especially Celestia. That bitch, I could rip her in two!"
I rolled my eyes at the ape comment. I was done correcting her at this point honestly. I'd already started to realise that her whole tough girl attitude was clearly just a front because no one ever supported her, apart from maybe her race. What were they called again? Changelings, that was it. Funny enough, she was the exact image of an anime term. What was it now? A tsundere, that's it! Thank you, internet.
I heard the door slightly creak open. I could only guess who that would be. Chrysalis stood up, getting into a battle like stance. Oh for fucks sake, not again! I stood up and I was going to try and tell her to simmer down a bit but the door opened as fast as usain bolt sprinting down a hill.
What? My imagination could be creative at times.
The door opened and revealed....yup, you guessed it. Celestia. Fun. Chrysalis snarled but before she could pounce like she clearly wanted to, Celestia held a hoof up and coughed to clear her throat.
"Chrysalis, please, just hear me out. I don't want any more violence to occur between us. Can we sit down and talk if that's possible?"
Buggy scoffed and rolled her eyes, looking towards me for a moment and then back at Celestia. "Celestia, you see this monkey here? He understood me in a mere minute more than you and your ponies have done in the several years since I tried to make a peace treaty with you! Don't act as if everything is hunky dory!"
Celestia glanced at me, clearly confused. I just shrugged and nodded. "I'm not sure what went off apart from what Chrysalis here has told me but from the sounds of it, she had to do what she had to do. But that's just my opinion." She gave me a hard and questioning glance before sighing, looking at Chrysalis.
"Let's go and talk somewhere. Sam, can you stay here while we do?"
I was about to respond but Chrysalis interrupted, apparently wanting to talk for me. "No, he comes with me. He might be a monkey who has already tested my patience but he is the only one who understands my side of it and I'd rather he hear it from your side too. He's already heard enough to just walts out of here without an opinion."
Celestia looked back over at me as I stared at Chrysalis, somewhat annoyed at her speaking for me. I wasn't a child alright, I could speak for myself! But she had a point. I had heard enough and I was morbidly curious to see what Celestia had to say about this now. Guess I wasn't going home anytime soon anyway.
"Alright, I'll tag along."
She sighed but after a moment of looking at Chrysalis, she turned back and nodded at me, motioning for us to follow. "This way. We'll talk in the meeting hall."
I held my hand out. "After you, bug lord." Chrysalis looked at me and rolled her eyes. I honestly was expecting a snarl but apparently not right now.
"Whatever you say, ape."
My mind was still too focused on that dream from last night to even give a response. Who knew fortune cookies could be so fucking deadly?