Rainbow Dash was snoozing as usual after the crazy day she had at school previously, until the ever so familiar beep of her alarm clock snapped her awake. Standing up in her morning haze, Rainbow started to push the stop button on her alarm clock, but after about 5 presses, it didn't work. Rainbow Dash just disregarded it and moved on. This time however, Rainbow simply bolted out her front door and started spaztically running through the city of Manehattan to get to her High School. Along the way, she was launched to the side by an unsuspecting chariot and knocked a little filly off her tricycle and into her mother. Seeing it as a faster means of transportation, Rainbow got on the trike and started madly pedaling to get to school. The mother just stared in awe at what had just happened. When Rainbow Dash busted through the front door of the high school and continued pedaling as she created a wave of ponies that she had plowed through. Finally, Rainbow stopped in front of her first period class, Mr. Cool's room. She quietly got off the tricycle and sat down in her usual seat,
"Attention class, you will all be having a pep rally starting after second period. Remember to walk out to the field and sit down in the bleachers accordingly and no dilly-dallying!" Mr. Cool stated as he waved his hoof to the class, Pinkie Pie suddenly awoke from her slumber,
"DILLY DALLYING! WHO SAYS THAT ANYMORE? OH WAIT! MR COOL DOES!" Pinkie shouted then obnoxiously laughed. Mr. Cool just disregarded this as usual,
"Also, today we will have two new students joining us today, please welcome Applejack..." Mr. Cool presented as an orange mare wearing a stetson entered the class, "and Twilight Sparkle..." Mr. Cool added on as a lavender unicorn came flying into the classroom the same way Pinkie usually did,
"AKSHUALY ITS TWIDOS 6.90 WEETART!" Twilight yelled to Mr. Cool as a random boot hit him in the face,
"OH LOOK! ANOTHER EGGHEAD IN THE CLASS! LOOKS LIKE YOUR NOT ALONE RAINBOW DASH! HA!" Pinkie Pie annoyingly yelled to Rainbow Dash. Rainbow just turned around to face Pinkie,
"You do realize there's a cannon filled with radioactive sewage that's about to fire in your face? WAH!" Rainbow yelled in panic as said item fired at Pinkie, covering her face in radioactive goop. Pinkie just laughed as a response,
"GOOD ONE RAINBOW DASH!" Pinkie yelled to her cyan mate. Rainbow Dash just turned back around to the front of the room,
"Wow, I was only in the class for 15 seconds and something gay happened!" Applejack yelled to the pair,
"YOU'RE GAY!" Pinkie yelled back to Applejack, who was now now sitting in her seat,
"BANANAS!" Applejack randomly shouted to the class,
"Hey girls, whoever wants to make some bad dubstep behind the bleachers with me raise your hoof!" Vinyl Scratch yelled out. Nopony raised their hoof at Vinyl's request,
"HAY GURLSH! MY NAMES TWIDOS 6.90 AND I'M MAJOR LEETHAXOR!" Twidos, now sitting in her seat next to Rainbow Dash shouted out,
"I leethaxed your mom!" Applejack responded,
"NU! MY MUM HASH A MAGIC PWOOF OS!" Twidos yelled back,
"If you understood what the term "leet" meant, then it's obvious, I PASSED THE BARRIER!" Applejack stated,
"YOU KNOW WHAT!? I'M GONNA LEETHAX YOU!" Twidos shouted. A flare from her horn ignited and Applejack was flung out of the room in an explosion,
"Alright, now for your warm up, how do you say hoof in Italian?" Mr. Cool asked to class, seemingly oblivious to what had just happened. He then looked towards Rainbow Dash, who was now sleeping on her desk, "Rainbow Dash, do you know this one?" Mr. Cool asked,
"No... but I'll tell you what you DON'T KNOW!" Rainbow yelled with her voice muffled in the desk,
"SHE'S A LESBIAN!" Pinkie yelled to the teacher,
"You're a lesbian!" Rainbow yelled through the desk,
"You're both lesbians!" Applejack butted into the mix,
"Oh, ok, sorry" Pinkie said in a normal voice, then obnoxiously laughed once again,
"Oh yeah, hoof is pierde!" Rainbow said to Mr. Cool, answering his question,
"WRONG! THAT MEANS FOOT!" Pinkie yelled up to Rainbow as a boot nailed her in the back of the head,
"You're a foot" Rainbow yelled through the desk,
"YOU'RE MOM'S A FOOT!" Pinkie yelled again, but the bell rang right after, putting an end to the madness of first period.
--
Rainbow made her casual entrance as Mr. Higglesworth stood in the doorway, but Pinkie of course knocked him off his feet as she entered. Once everyone entered the classroom,
"Woah! These fagolas again!?" Mr. Higglesworth yelled then jumped out the window of the room in panic. Rainbow Dash and the other students stared in confusion, but Pinkie stared with a stupid smile on her face. Mr. Higgs, then emerged from behind the podium, "Woah! Just kidding! Alright! At the end of the period today we'll head down to that gay Pep rally crap, so don't make a scene!" Mr. Higgs exclaimed to the class,
"Your a scene!" A voice from the doorway responded. Mr. Higglesworth turned and saw an orange mare known as Applejack standing in the doorway. Mr. Higgs laughed weirdly at this sight,
"A new fagola to make fun of! From now on until you die a lonely death I'm going to call you fagola..." Mr. Higglesworth said to Applejack,
"Actually, the name's Applejack" Applejack corrected,
"HI APPLEJACK, MORE LIKE ALCOHOL!" Pinkie yelled while madly laughing until a boot hit her in the head,
"Congratulations, anyway, I have your grades for those fag quizzes the other day! Rainbow Dash, F!" Mr. Higgs yelled as Rainbow got hit in the face with a clipboard, "Pinkie Pie, F! Big Mac, F! Octavia, F! Fluttershy, F! and Fagola, F!" Mr. Higglesworth called out to said ponies as they each got a clipboard thrown at their face,
"I didn't even take it though!" Applejack said back while she was still on the ground,
"That's why you failed!" Mr. Higgs replied as he laughed,
"My Celestia, transferring to this school was a big mistake!" Applejack responded,
"Hey, everyone makes mistakes fagola, like you know, how your redneck parents made you? Big mistake!" Mr. Higglesworth yelled back as a shopping cart was thrown at the already thrown down pony,
"Hey teacher, can I go to the bathroom?" Pinkie asked in her normal voice,
"The opposite of yes!" Mr. Higgs replied as another clipboard collided with her face. At the end of Mr. Higgs's chaos train, the principle came upon the loudspeaker,
"Attention, all students and teachers must report to the bleachers at this moment. Attention, this is your principle, attention, I am still your principle, attention, attention, attention, thanks, that's all" The principle said over the intercom,
"You heard your unicornfag principle, get going!" Mr. Higglesworth yelled to the class.
--
Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie moved quickly through the halls to get out back to the field, eventually picking up Twidos and Applejack along the way. Eventually, the group was outside on the field,
"HEY GIRLS, YOU WANNA JUST SKIP THE GAY PEP RALLY?" Pinkie asked to the group of friends. Various statements of agreement sounded. Just then, Miss Pony wheeled over in her office chair, keyboard in her lap,
"I hope you girls don't plan on skipping this week's pep rally, because Mr. Higglesworth will be guarding the exit" her text to speech translator said,
"H-hold on one second" Pinkie said, then proceeded to fling Miss Pony away and into a football post, "KAY GIRLS THE COAST IS CLEAR, LET'S GET THE HELL OUTTA HERE!" Pinkie exclaimed loudly to the group,
"Where do poor excuses for fillies think you're going?" a voice said. The 4 of them turned to see it was Shining Armor, their PE Coach,
"WER JUST GONNA SKIP SHEH PEP RALLY" Twidos said annoyingly,
"SHUT UP TWIDOS! YOU RUINED THE SUPRISE!" Pinkie yelled out,
"There is no room for suprise her, sister sit down, DOWN!" Shining yelled to the group, and so they sat down in the bleachers casually. Later, there were only 3 ponies of the group sitting, watching the pep rally,
"Hey girls, did you see where Pinkie went?" Rainbow Dash asked the group,
"If she's escaping and leaving us here, then who wants to knock some shots with the partyers at the back of the school?" Applejack asked. All three ponies raised their hoof until a familiar voice sounded from below,
"HEY FAGOLAS, DOWN HERE!" The voice yelled out. The trio looked over the edge of the bleachers to see Pinkie Pie near the corner of the bleachers, "I FOUND A SECRET PATH THAT CAN LEAD US OUTSIDE!" Pinkie yelled upward again. The trio hopped down and all 4 of them quickly moved through the passage out of the school.
Eventually, the escapees found themselves in an area that looked like an industrial park outside of Manehattan. As the group got closer to the exit through a fence, the form of Mr. Higglesworth jumped out of the bushes bearing an automatic weapon,
"Hey! Who's restricted area here? Go back or I'll be forced to rape your faces that are made of poop!" Mr. Higglesworth loudly stated while pointing his gun at the 4 ponies and laughing maniacally,
"WELL, ANY BRILLIANT IDEAS ANYPONY?" Pinkie loudly asked,
"I think I have a sexy one" Applejack stated then casually walked out onto the nearby road, "Seeya girls!" Applejack said as her goodbye and started comically running out of the area,
"Oh darn, I'm not allowed of school property! Celestia-damned earth pony!" Mr. Higgs yelled out as he opened fire at the dashing pony, but the bullets somehow missed,
"HEY GURLSH, LET ME SHAVE OUR STUPID ASSES" Twidos said to Rainbow and Pinkie, then ignited her horn and began to float through the air, going through every object in the area,
"WELL, IT LOOKS LIKE WE'RE SCREWED, RAINBOW DASH!" Pinkie yelled out after Twidos's escape,
"Hold your fagola mouths, let me ask the principle if I can order an elite army, and if I'm allowed off school property!" Mr. Higgs said hysterically as he took out a letter and scribbled "EL33T ARMEE AND OF SKOOL PROP" on the note in horrible handwriting. Meanwhile, Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie were making a mad dash as Mr. Higglesworth was distracted. A few seconds later, a letter came back to the psychotic teacher with nothing more than "Yes" written on it. As the two ponies were quickly escaping, a bunch of black chariots containing Equestrian soldiers came around the corner and surrounded the duo. Mr. Higglesworth exited one of the chariots, "Turn around fagolas, this is your last stand!" Mr. Higgs said with his weapon pointed, and soldiers slowly closing in,
"AS I WAS SAYING, IT LOOKS LIKE WE'RE SCREWED RAINBOW DASH!" Pinkie yelled again as more chariots approached. Rainbow then slyly began to walk towards a chariot lacking a pony to pull it,
"She's walking! F! SHOOT HER!" Mr. Higglesworth yelled out as he opened fire on Rainbow Dash, the bullets somehow missing. Finally, once the psycho had to reload, Rainbow Dash quickly restrained herself in the appropriate spot and began to pull the chariot. She somehow got Pinkie in the chariot just by running over her, but Rainbow still made quick work of fleeing the scene. Soon coming to Applejack and Twidos being pinned to a wall by a couple soldiers, Rainbow also got them in the vehicle by ramming into them. As Rainbow continued to pull at a high speed,
"WOAH! WHERE'D YOU GET THE COOL FAGOLA MOVES!" Pinkie yelled from inside the chariot. Rainbow Dash just ignored her and kept galloping, using her wings to move faster,
"Hey Rainbow Dash, did you ever get your puller's license?" Applejack asked to the speeding pony,
"Nope" Rainbow said succinctly. After getting to the front area of the industrial park and heading towards the road that led to everyone's home, one of the chariot's wheels got caught in a pothole, causing it to stop abruptly, "Hey guys, why'd this thing stop?" Rainbow asked, panting because of her hard running,
"HMM, THE LEVER IS POINTING TO THE EMPTY CIRCLE, WHICH MEANS SHE WON'T GO UNTIL SOMEONE BANGS HER!" Pinkie obnoxiously said. Rainbow just facehooved at Pinkie's stupidity,
"WE HIT A PAWTHOLE WEETARTS" Twidos quickly said. All of a sudden, Mr. Higglesworth and his army appeared around the hijacked chariot,
"Alright fagolas, get out or else!" Mr. Higgs yelled to the group,
"OR ELSE WHAT?" Pinkie yelled back,
"Or else I'll kill you!" Mr. Higglesworth said and started laughing psychotically,
"OH WOW, SHTUPID ME, I FORGOT TO NOCLIP USH OUT OF HERE" Twidos exclaimed, ignited her horn, and then the chariot flew upwards into the sky without a sound with everypony still in it.
--
All four ponies appeared in front of Rainbow Dash's small house, standing around like nothing had happened,
"EGGHEAD POWER!" Pinkie screamed out and started laughing,
"Thanks for the ride Rainbow Dash! I'll see you at school tomorrow" Applejack said to Rainbow before leaving,
"THANKSH FOR SAVING OUR ASH" Twidos yelled out then noclipped away,
"YOU'RE GAY! Just kidding, your cool now" Pinkie said to Rainbow Dash, who smirked a little at the statement, "Oh, one more thing" Pinkie added and then a random boot hit Rainbow Dash, "BYEEEEEEEE!" Pinkie yelled out then began to inflate her tale to float into the sky. With only Rainbow Dash left, she got up and went back into her small house, to find her alarm clock still beeping. Rainbow just sighed in agony and kept going with her daily life.