Oddly enough, I didn’t even feel tired after staying awake all night. I watched the sunrise through the window; starting as a barely noticeable blue peeking through the curtains, then gradually getting brighter until it illuminated the entire room with sunlight. The sound of birds chirping, combined with various animals scampering on the outskirts of Fluttershy’s cottage, were nothing short of tranquil.
Angel awoke with them, hopping off the top of my head and right into my lap. He rubbed his eyes as he peered up at me, standing right on my journal and stopping my writing where it was. Thankfully, I’d been writing everything in wingdings, so it just looked like I was doodling random symbols to anyone who saw it. Well, I suppose there is the exception of the tally marks, but I’m the only one who would know what those were for.
“Good morning, Angel.” I said as I traced a finger on the edges of his ear. He chirped something back, then put his paws on his hips and leaned forward as he tried to read what was on the pages. He gave up a moment later, scratching his chin and looking up at me. “It’s a language I made up. All my deepest, darkest secrets are in here, and I don’t want any loveable little animals reading them.” I explained as I booped him.
He didn’t take kindly to that, wrinkling his nose and huffing as he hopped off my lap and into the kitchen. I flipped through the entirety of the journal, finding that there were still more empty pages than filled ones. But…that didn’t make any sense. I had counted the pages and knew there weren’t that many. Maybe I had just miscounted?
It didn’t matter, I’ll just get another whenever I eventually reach the end. I already filled it with everything I could think of: from what I’ve heard about The Elements of Harmony, to cutie marks and how they occasionally relate to the ponies they’re on. I’d even had so much time that I could organize it in order of what happened, along with a list of things I needed to test, and various questions I still needed to figure out. I even added an index and put numbers on each page.
…
It just occurred to me that I may have more free time than I knew what to do with.
Angel returned with a carrot in his mouth, balancing a glass of tea in his tiny arms. I gently took it, enjoying the refreshing drink for what’s likely the last time in a while. With a relieved sigh, I closed the book, finding it noticeably heavier as I lifted it back into my inventory. Once my backpack was on the ground, I crossed my legs and let my body press into the couch. He took immediate advantage of this, hopping into the empty spot and propping himself up on my thighs.
I watched the animals play outside, clouds pass and birds fly. It was around eight or nine, so I still had a few hours to relax. Angel wasn’t as upset at me as before, or wasn’t showing it if he was. Fluttershy should come down at any moment. Well, if she hadn’t completely ruined her sleep schedule worrying about me that is.
What would I even say to her if she did? Nothing came to mind, except for another pointless apology. There was nothing more I could really say, despite all that I wanted to. The only thing waiting for me was more awkward silence and a growing tension; I couldn’t say how much more of that I could take.
I placed the glass on the ground, picking Angel up while he was eating the carrot, much to his dismay. I closed my eyes and held him tightly against my chest. “Angel, I’m going to go now. I’m going to miss you, and Fluttershy.”
He squeaked something, pushing away and letting out a deadly cute noise. Luckily, my weeks of living with him have helped me build a tolerance. I got to my feet, placing him on the couch as I placed the pillows where I saw them originally. Something red poked out from the corner of the cushion. The fabric felt familiar as I pulled it out, laying it across my hands.
It was the scarf, the same one Cloudy made for me.
The length, the fabric, and the shade were all the same; she must have given it to Fluttershy at some point. Why did she keep it? Did she want to give it to me when I woke up and just forgot to do so? That didn’t sound like her, so then what was it doing here?
I chewed my lip, placing it in my inventory. No matter the reason, it was at Fluttershy’s. Pinkie’s mom made it specifically for me, even if I didn’t use it. It would feel wrong to just leave it on the couch, despite knowing I couldn’t bring myself to wear it again.
As I began walking the trail to Ponyville, I stopped and turned, burning the beautiful sight of Fluttershy’s cottage into my mind. Some part of me desperately hoped she would burst through the door, flying towards me and holding me in her soft embrace; telling me I didn’t have to go and that we could work things out, that she could convince Twilight to send another letter to Celestia and let me stay.
Of course, that didn’t happen.
____________
I absentmindedly wandered around Ponyville for the time I had left, much to my body’s protest. It still wanted more rest, although its complaining was tolerable compared to yesterday’s. And if I just sat on the stairs of the town hall and waited, I’d get gradually more anxious until just breathing was a struggle. It was almost fun to see what ponies woke up at what times as I walked around. Most were awake by ten, though some houses clearly housed ponies that worked late. The rest were going about eating their flower sandwiches, talking to their friends, or just walking around like I was.
It occurred to me that, while I had been in Ponyville for a few weeks, I didn’t really know the names of the residents outside of Dark, Fluttershy, and her friends. Maybe I should change that if I come back.
A chariot came just as Twilight said it would; golden and being pulled by two large pegasi stallions. Both of them donned similar golden armor covering everything but their wings and face. After landing, other than a sideways glance, they didn’t acknowledge my presence. They simply started stretching their wings while standing silently.
The dramatic arrival of the chariot certainly attracted the attention of everyone around. Whispering and chattering amongst themselves, the majority of ponies present started eyeing me. I rubbed my pendant, shrinking under their piercing leers. Without a word, I climbed into the chariot, finding the inside cushioned with a comfortable purple material. It had plenty of space, enough to lay down if I wanted to.
The pegasi began walking forward, gradually getting faster as they burst into a full on sprint. I couldn’t help but yelp as I latched onto the side, gripping the edges of the chariot like it was going to try to throw me out at any moment.
It got better the further into the air we ascended, until finally there was no turbulence at all. Soon, it was completely steady; the pegasi flew straight as an arrow towards the city on the mountain, flexing every muscle on their body but showing no real strain. It was actually kind of similar to the train, though less bumpy and a lot more wind blowing through my hair.
It was much nicer than I expected it to be. Almost pleasant actually. Is that what flying was like? If so, I could understand why some pegasi did it all the time. Along with tricks and just hovering instead of standing, it must have been freeing.
I couldn’t help but be a little envious.
I watched the residents as we flew above the city, which was just as well decorated and extravagant. In fact, they all reminded me of Carousel Boutique; Rarity must have styled her home after one she saw in Canterlot. Homes, cafés, clothing shops, all kinds of buildings stood out with their own unique look. While Ponyville’s residents wore primarily casual clothes, Canterlots’ were more formal, suits and dresses; on top of other things like monocles, hats, bow ties seemed to be the norm. All of them looked their best, however some seemed like they were walking around and had nowhere to go in particular.
There were also pegasi that were flying in the sky, some of which were close enough to see me. I couldn’t hear what they were saying, but their expressions as they stared at me told me all I needed to know. I’m sure the only reason they weren’t approaching was because I was being escorted by some kind of special guard; at least I assumed they were.
As we landed, the chariot once again got bumpy, but I was prepared. There were several other guards waiting, all wearing the same armor with the addition of long spears. The second my feet hit the ground, two of the guards approached me; both mares. They weren’t particularly tall, but the size of them and their armor as they carried spears that towered over them reminded me of how small I really was.
The one on the right was taller but scrawnier; purple eyes with a blueish-green mane. While the one on the left was shorter, but noticeably wider. Brighter yellow eyes and a purple, styled mane that stuck out from the other guards. Not taking her eyes off me as the one on the left pulled out a scroll with her magic and began reading from it.
“Chara Dreemurr, you’re now in the protective custody of Princess Celestia. While-”
“Protective custody? I t-”
“You’re here, you will do as she says and as we tell you as we work as extensions of Princess Celestia’s authority. A residence will be provided for you, along with all necessities and access to the entirety of the castle; only the castle. You are not to leave without an escort party or express permission. You are also to remain here as long as Princess Celestia deems. Any questions shall be directed only to Princess Celestia, who you will treat with the utmost respect, along with Princess Mi Amore Cadenza and Princess Luna.”
Every sentence brought a new question, none of which she acknowledged, as she didn’t dare look away from the scroll she was reading for a moment. While I now knew that I would be allowed to roam the castle, I didn’t know Princess Luna would be here too; along with whoever Mi Amore Cadenza was.
“Why is-”
“Any questions shall be directed to Princess Celestia.” She repeated, closing the scroll and putting it away. “Who is awaiting you in the dining hall. We shall escort you there, and then to where you will be staying. Afterwards, if you wish to explore the castle, one of us will be available depending on whose shift it is. We have been assigned specifically to watch you, and all that yada yada yada.” she finished as she put away the scroll, the purple magic that enveloped her horn vanishing.
“Finally! Ugh, reading those scrolls, like, almost makes the job not worth it.” the pegasus said with a roll of her eyes, flicking her wings and bumping against the unicorn. “I’m Brash Bulwark, and this is my bestest friend in the world: Luster Lance. We’re here to totally welcome you to Canterlot So, like, welcome!”
“Yeah, welcome!”
The stoicness they held before completely crumbled the moment they finished the scroll, though the other royal guards didn’t adopt such behavior.
“Hm,” I glanced between them, unable to shake a blot of familiarity welling up the back of my mind. “Do you know why I’m here?”
“Nope!” They responded in unison.
“Princess Celestia told us that you’d be our first big assignment; we’re supposed to keep our eyes on you while The Princess is busy doing royal stuff!”
“And, like, bring you whatever you need! Take you to The Royal Archives, if you like being bored!”
“Or the hedge maze!”
“Or the sculpture garden!”
“Those are the same place, Brash.”
“Not if you don’t go into the maze, it’s not.”
They talked so rapidly and with so much pep it was hard to keep up. The Royal Archives certainly interested me, but the other locations didn’t sound particularly intriguing since I found sculptures pretty dull and mazes needlessly complex.
Judging from their nonchalantness, they didn’t know why I was here in the first place. Celestia must have decided to keep it to herself, or only inform the other princesses. The pegasi pulling the chariot had already left, leaving only me and the handful of other guards in the area.
“Ok.” I started, taking a deep breath. “I’m ready to meet Celestia.”
The inside of the castle was just as well decorated and furnished: a red rug with occasional sun symbols, variously colored banners on the walls, flowers on every pillar, golden doors and archways; It felt like just entering would be considered a privilege. One section in particular struck a chord of dread that only grew with each step.
A hallway before a large, golden door. The floor was made out of checkered tiles, enormous pillars towering over me with glass windows in between each one. Sunlight was shining brightly through them.
The similarities to Judgment Hall were so uncanny it disturbed me.
When the guards opened the door, I expected Celestia to be sitting on a throne; peering down at me and somehow able to see all of my sins like I had rested them barren before her. Instead, there was a…dining table? Quite a large one that must have been meant for parties or feasts, but it only had three chairs at the moment; two of which were occupied.
The chair on the opposite side from me sat the largest pony I’d seen so far, and the first with both wings and a horn. Her multicolored-mane defied gravity itself, flowing to the side in a way that radiated grace; her coat so pure white it would have been painful to look at in a bright room. She looked at me with magenta eyes that would bring me to my knees if she held a scowl instead of the small smile she currently had.
She was casually sitting in her chair, horn illuminated in a golden aura as she drank from a teacup floating in front of her. When I walked in, her pupils darted to me as they briefly narrowed as she cleared her throat and placed the teacup on the table. The golden crown and peytral I’d seen her wearing in the books sat on the table with the food, well polished but unworn.
“Oh, hello Chara. Hmmm,” she hummed as she looked at me. “Maybe Twilight’s next lesson should be about descriptions. I got the impression you would be,” she paused, pressing her lips together. “Bigger.”
The other alicorn I didn’t recognize was noticeably smaller. A light pink coat with a multicolored mane; mostly dark purple, a darker pink, and the end of it was almost pure white as it curled. It was actually somewhat like Rarity’s manestyle, but longer so more of it was straight. A smaller crown and necklace sat on the table in front of her, which presumably were hers.
“The human’s here? I wonder-” as soon as she turned to me, her purple eyes shrunk into dots. A visible shudder went up her spine, entire body going stiff like invisible hands had wrapped themselves around her.
“Cadance?” Celestia’s relaxed tone hardened. “Are you ok?”
Cadance pulled her chair closer to the table, tightly gripping the sides as her horn briefly flickered with magic. “Yeah. Just felt wrong all of a sudden. It’ll pass.”
“Hm.” There was a burden filled emptiness as Celestia and Cadance exchanged a look, saying something with their eyes that I couldn’t translate. “Very well then. Chara, please,sit.”
Her horn enshrouded a chair in front of me, pulling it out and gesturing for me to sit. I couldn’t help but gulp; Cadance’s leer dug into my soul, making it hard to just breathe properly. It was only made worse by the fact I didn’t know why she was suddenly so apprehensive of me. If she was here, then she must've known I was coming, so why the shift? Was it something about my appearance? I reflexively adjusted my hair, covering my ears and making sure my sleeves covered my wrists, ignoring how sticky my hands were at the moment.
“I,” I started as I placed my backpack on the ground and sat in the chair. I looked over what was actually on the table. Despite its size, very little. There was a plate in front of Celestia that held a stack of pancakes, decorated with various fruits and whip cream to resemble a face. Cadance had a bowl of various vegetables, and what looked like a glass of orange juice. What sat in front of me was some sort of…bread roll? It was a very light brown bread, almost to the point of being orange; Sprinkled with so much sugar it resembled snow, while the inside was filled with a creamy-looking substance with the bread swirling in the center.
“What,” I poked it, finding it soft and warm. “Is this?”
“It’s a pumpkin roll.” Celestia stated. “I heard you liked sweet things, and it was the first thing to come to mind when I was wondering what you could eat that you wouldn’t normally be able to get in Ponyville.”
My hand gripped the end of the fork, a lot tighter than I intended as it dug painfully into my hand. As appetizing as it looked, I couldn’t bring myself to try to eat it; I don’t think I could keep anything down.
“I don’t understand.” I muttered. Meeting Cadance’s gaze, I immediately started shrinking under it as I tried to look anywhere else.
“What do you not understand? It’s made out of pumpkin bread, cinnamon, filled with cream cheese, and some other things. I didn’t have the pleasure of making it myself, as the chef insisted.”
“No, I meant-” I bit the inside of my cheek, finding the various aching in my body becoming harder to ignore. “Twilight told you what I did, right?”
“Of course.” She nodded. “Twilight tells me everything in her letters.”
“Then why are you being so casual with me? I thought-”
“That you’d be treated like a prisoner?”
She finished for me, though it wasn’t how I was going to word it. When I didn’t say anything, Celestia raised the teacup with her magic, taking a drawn out sip. “I suppose, on paper, that would be a fair assumption. However, I think it will ease your mind to know I had planned on inviting you to the castle anyway. Recent events have simply,” for just a moment, her expression contorted into a focused scowl, before relaxing and reverting to her default smirk. “Accelerated things. However, I admit your actions,” she glanced at Cadance, who didn’t appear to be willing to ease up. Celestia briefly inhaled. “Chara, how much do you know about me?”
“Uh,” I tried to think of every detail I read in the books, absentmindedly twirling the fork in my hand. “You’ve been the ruler of Equestria for over a millennia, and in that time you ushered in an era of peace; ponies have prospered under your guidance. However,” I stumbled over my words, recalling some segments that I can’t imagine she’d like to hear.
Celestia noticed my hesitation, leaning forward and tilting her head. “Go on.”
“Other species haven’t,” I held my breath. “Been as fortunate. Many, like the dragons, aren’t on the best terms with ponies. The griffons are worse off than they’ve ever been. While Equestria is thriving, other countries have been suffering. I don’t mean to imply that you had anything to do with that! It’s just,” I felt so insignificant in front of her. All the books spoke her power, and I found it easier to believe she could control the sun while in her presence. Cadance was just as terrifying; While I knew enough about Celestia to fear her, that wasn’t the case with Cadance. Not a mention of her name in any of the books or from Twilight, was she new? Had she just been in hiding until recently for some reason? She could be just as powerful as Celestia.
Maybe that was why they were treating me with such a lack of caution: they’re so overwhelmingly powerful by themselves that I wasn’t a threat. Together, they could light up their horns and turn me into nothing.
“Something I noticed.” I whispered.
“I see. This is a conversation I have had many times before, and I would like to have it with you at a later time. For now,” she extended her wing, placing it on Cadance’s shoulder. She visibly tensed, gritting her teeth and tearing her eyes away from me. She whispered something to Celestia just out of earshot, before picking up her food and drink with magic and leaving the room. “Let’s discuss what I know about you.”
Her leaving should have made me feel better; instead, it only made that bundle of anxiety in my chest infinitely heavier. Was Cadence going to get the guards for some reason? Or just covering the exit so I couldn’t escape? All I could do was guess, and I hate it.
“You’re new.” Celestia started. “When you’re as old as I am, new is very rare. To my knowledge, there has never been a human in Equestria; made only more interesting by the fact that you’re also a conjurer. The first thing you did was put yourself in danger, to no benefit of yourself, in order to help some of my little ponies. You like animals, but have trouble with other ponies; physical contact is your biggest hurdle, and you claim to have amnesia. Although my star pupil has expressed that she isn’t sure how truthful you’re being about that. And,” her horn lit up with that golden aura, lifting something from the ground beside her and placing it in front of me. It was a cup of brown liquid; I held it in my hands, trying to keep them from shaking as I took a tentative sip.
It was chocolate milk.
“You like chocolate. Maybe I’m old-fashioned, but I prefer vanilla myself. Immortality has shown me that you truly can’t beat the classics.”
I placed the cup back on the table, not able to drink it despite how dry my mouth felt. “Then, what do you plan on doing with me? For,” I tried to relax my hands, to let go of the sides of the ends of the table, but I couldn’t. “Killing the diamond dogs.”
“What would you like me to do with you?”
“I,” my brain struggled to process the question, failing to come up with even a single thought. “What?”
“Well, you came here expecting to be punished, did you not? Yet, you came anyway. You could have run, gone anywhere in all of Equestria. Still, you willingly got into the chariot sent for you. You came with the guards assigned to you without complaint, and you sat across from me without question. Many ponies-” she pursed her lips. “People who feel like they did the right thing wouldn’t walk into a punishment; and those who know they did the wrong thing rarely would either. You thought you would be treated like a prisoner, which didn’t hinder you. So, I’ll ask again.”
Celestia leaned forward, meeting my eyes and locking me into her gaze so tightly that looking away was unthinkable.
“What would you like me to do with you?”
She waited patiently; no magic, no sound, no one else in the room. If I focused, I could even hear the birds in the outside garden. It was almost like Fluttershy’s cottage, but with an added element of eeriness.
“I,” what do I even say to that? Did I want to be locked up? Abandoned and forgotten again? Or just allowed to roam the castle like I’d done nothing wrong? “Don’t know.”
“Yes, I suspected you may not. Then, let’s make this easier on both of us and allow me to explain what I intend to do, and you are free to give suggestions.” She pulled out a letter, extending it and then skimming over it with her eyes. “I do not believe you’re dangerous. If you were, I can’t understand why you would be trying to live so peacefully with the residents of Ponyville when you could have hurt them at any time. Surely, you killed those diamond dogs because you felt you had to; in your eyes it was justified. Yet, for whatever reason, you didn’t tell Twilight what this reason was. However, over my long life of meeting hundreds, if not thousands of ponies, I have become quite good at judging character. The best solution would be to tell me why, but I do not expect you to tell me anytime soon, if ever, really.”
Celestia got out of her chair, throwing away the few of her leftovers. The letter was closed and put away as she walked over to me. “My niece seems to have come down with something lately, but hopefully later you will be able to talk with her while she’s in better shape. Luna, when she has awakened, will be meeting you as well. As I’m sure the guards have already told you, you will be allowed to explore this castle as much as you like. Until I feel that I and the others have reached a consensus on you, you will remain here. We will chat daily for breakfast, and maybe dinner, but otherwise you will be left to your own devices. Luna and Cadance have both expressed their interest, though for different reasons. Your room should have everything you need; unless you would prefer a cell?”
She chuckled as she winked at me. Every word she said had the same playful, yet stern tone; like she was talking to an old friend.
“It doesn’t sound like you’re taking what I did that seriously.” I whispered. “I murdered them.”
“Oh no, it’s quite serious. Murder hasn’t happened in Equestria for quite a while; I assure you, we will talk about that at a later time. That being said,” her smile faltered, eyebrows furrowing as she kept strong eye contact. “There’s very little I could say that you don’t already know. You’ve been giving yourself a harder time than anyone else could.”
It wasn’t a question, but a statement that left no room for doubt. Her wings briefly flickered, like she wanted to extend them out to me. Whether because Twilight told her of my problem with physical contact, or she was just being cautious, I couldn’t tell.
I steeled my resolve, breaking my eyes away from her and trying to look anywhere else. “What about Twilight and the others? Just because you send me back, doesn’t mean they’ll be ok with me again.”
“Unfortunately, you are right.” Celestia added with a sigh. “Trust is so important in friendship, especially for those six who are still learning so much about it. There is little I can do for you, nor would I when it comes to your relationship with them. If I become more than a spectator, then nothing will be learned and nothing will be solved.”
I stewed on her words for a silent minute, finding them similar to what Rarity had told me. My hands didn’t shake as much as I held the fork, managing to slice off some of the pumpkin roll and biting it: it was soft, and the creamy substance it was filled with was exceptionally sweet and blended well with the bread.
It was good, even great. It reminded me of the pastries Pinkie made before we left: filled with care and a nigh tangible passion for baking.
I’d only been gone from Ponyville for maybe an hour, and I missed it so much that at that moment I wanted to sob.
“What am I going to be doing today?”
“Whatever you like. Your room is just to the left outside the door and down the hall, the guards will guide you there if you’d like them to.”
“Then may I go now?”
“Hmm,” she peered down at me, eyes scanning for something. “Of course. You aren’t a prisoner, after all.” Celestia said with heavy emphasis. “Please take your food and drink with you; I’d hate for them to go to waste.”
I nodded, rapidly getting to my feet as I slid my backpack on. The glass of chocolate milk and plate of pumpkin roll were light, and took both of my hands to hold. Celestia used her magic to open the doors for me, departing with a wave and a blithe grin.
Although I didn’t ask them to, the guards had waited for me right outside. Before I could say anything they took the food in my hands. The pegasus held the glass in her wings and the unicorn floated the food in their magic. They followed me as I began walking to my room, my gaze fixed on the pathway and not straying to any of the glass windows or banners on the walls.
The door to my room, thankfully, wasn’t a fancy one. I placed my hand on the curved door handle, holding my breath as I opened it; It was much larger than I expected it to be, enough to hold various pieces of furniture- a bed as large as Fluttershy’s with a huge canopy hanging overhead, and a nightstand with a large lamp. It had a wardrobe that I didn’t need, and a cabinet with a mirror. Two doors leading to a balcony sat opposite of the bed, and another door that I presumed led to a bathroom.
‘Luxurious' didn't feel like a strong enough word to describe what would be my home until further notice.
“Wow, this place is fancy! Even by Canterlot standards.” Luster remarked as she absentmindedly placed the chocolate milk on the cabinet, spreading her wings and flying around the room. “You must be, like, super important! Only some of the nobles Princess Celestia tries to appease get to stay in here!”
“Or the Princess is trying to earn your trust. She’ll send some of the more uptight nobles here too when they’re peeved about something.” Brash added, floating the pumpkin roll over to the glass and setting it down.
“Well, I’m not really important or anything.” I said as I placed the backpack on the ground in front of the bed. “I think she just wants me to be comfortable while I’m here.”
“Of course she does! Princess Celestia personally invited you to her castle. That almost never happens if you’re not an Element or one of her students.”
“Invited?” I asked myself, realizing that’s what she must have told them. Why lie? Does she not want the guards knowing why I was here? Did anyone other than her know at all? “Yeah, I guess so.”
“Welp, we’ll leave you alone now as per our orders.” Brash said as she rolled her eyes, grabbing Luster in her magic and grounding her. “Come on, Lust. As boring as it is, we’re supposed to stand outside her room alllll day.” she drew out as she gestured outside.
“Fine, but we’re finishing that game of O&O! I’ve got the dice on me and everything.”
The door shut behind them before I could hear anything else, leaving me alone in a room far more extravagant than I deserved. As soon as I was alone, I closed my eyes and extended my arms, pulling them back to my sides as I inhaled. Each breath made the weight in my chest just a little lighter, and the tightness in my stomach a little looser.
When I felt like I could keep it down, I sat on the stool in front of the cabinet and began eating the food prepared for me. To my pleasant surprise, it was still warm. The bread was still deliciously soft when mixed with the cream; and it paired perfectly with the thick chocolate milk. A familiar tingling made its home in my heart as I ate. I tried picturing myself back at Sugarcube Corner, with Pinkie and Fluttershy talking about whatever transpired that day.
Unfortunately, I eventually ate all of it, meaning I had to come back to reality. I wasn’t at Sugarcube Corner; Pinkie and Fluttershy didn’t want to be around me.
Despite the food filling me, my stomach still created an emptiness that I couldn’t escape.
I gradually made my way to the bed, collapsing in the middle of it and burying my head as deep into one of the huge pillows as I could. It was as soft as it appeared, though not as much as the Echo Stratus bed Dark let me pass out in. It was warm, only marginally less so than the pumpkin roll. If I pressed my lips together tight enough, I could still taste some of the cinnamon.
“Oh,” I muttered, dozens of thoughts hitting me now that all my emotions weren’t bundled together like a ball of yarn. “I didn’t ask about my Manik system.”
Or probably a handful of other things. On top of new problems, like Cadance. Not only did I know nothing about her, but she already has some problem with me. Considering what Celestia said about reaching a consensus among them, that could only bode poorly for me. Luna too was someone I needed to keep in mind, a meeting with her will happen sooner or later.
What was I supposed to do? Earn their trust? Convince them I wasn’t going to hurt anyone? Celestia already seemed extremely confident that I wasn’t a threat, while Cadance seemed sure of the opposite. So, what, I could convince all the people Celestia wanted me to that I wasn’t dangerous, but it wouldn’t matter because Cadance still thought I was?
Everything was so overwhelmingly exhausting, and I had no spoiled rotten rabbit to absorb all my stress with his floppy ears and pure white fur. No one I could talk to, no new home, no old one either.
I wrapped my arms around the pillow, tightly pushing it against my chest as the corners tickled my face. All the fatigue caught up with me, making it hard to gather the resolve to even take off my shoes. Darkness came easily in spite of the sunlight coming through the windows; the heaviness of the weight in my chest shifted to my eyes.
“I miss you, Azzy.” I murmured as I drifted off into the escape of unconsciousness.
_______
The noise of doors bursting open jostled me right out of my sleep; heart pounding to a painful extent and adrenaline pumping like a potent poison. The sharp wind stung my face and pushed my hair back, though not strong enough to knock over the empty glass I’d left.
The source of the sudden storm was the third alicorn I’d yet to meet: shorter than Celestia, but still towering over me. Her wings were beating to her sides like a majestic display of superiority as she lowered herself onto the railing of the balcony with the grace of a perfectionist ballerina. Resting one leg onto the other, arms resting on the edges as she leaned forward.
“Chara Dreemurr, yes?”
The moonlight illuminated her so perfectly it was almost unnatural; her luminescent sapphire blue mane flowed like a living piece of the night sky, small sparkles inside that resembled stars. Her dark blue coat was a stark, yet complimenting contract. A Black crown sat on her head, paired with a black peytral that held a waning moon in the center.
Unlike Celestia, Luna wore… pajamas? A light gray two piece with various phases of the moon, even an eclipse every now and again.
“Yes.” I responded meekly.
She smirked at that, tilting her head and extending her hand to me. Her horn illuminates with a visceral dark blue magic.
“Come, dance among the stars with us.”