Pacifica laid on her belly, stared at the opossum, who stared back on his belly. "Sup?"
"Sup." Tavener replied.
"So, you're different. You a human?"
"I'm a middle aged guy who doesn't give a shit about others." the opposum replied.
"Dude, we're soul besties." Pacifica said.
"Dude."
"Dude."
"Dude."
"Hey, wanna go ruin someone's day?" Pacifica asked.
Tavener got up. "Yes." he said, his eyes gleaming.
*MANEHATTEN*
A racoon dragged itself off of the road. "Well, I never saw this coming." He looked at his paws. "I wonder if the others are here. Hey! Sick Beat! Slick Beat!... Regular Beat?" A whimper escaped his lips. "Domino? Kitty Cat Clyde?" He walked over to the wall and sat down. "Come on Grunt ya runt! (In reference to Grunt_runt17) Get it together."
"Alright, so you're now a racoon-" He paused, and grinned. "You're now a racoon. No one suspects a racoon." Grunt said with a smile. He walked out of the alley with a grin. "No one."
*ELSEWHERE*
Patrick finished setting up the harness he made for the rock. "Alright, let's Raya and the Last Dragon this crap." He sat upon the rock, dressed in a cloak of simple brown and a chinese hat. Patrick checked the bags of supplies once more. "World of My Little Pony, meet Patrick the Pinkie Clone.
***
Tim had lived a simple life, yes. And he was now a rock, True. Life was now simpler, No. No? No. Life was different, yes.He was a rock, yes. And now he has a Pink Pony Mare sitting on him, true. The mare said she was a he, yes? So she was a trans he, true. But do ponies have trans? They will see, yes.
*TIMMY*
Timmy lazily drifted through town. "Oddly, I feel younger." he said to a random pony.
Derpy smiled at the tortoise. "Heya Mister Tank! I don't have any turtle treats, sorry."
"That's alright." Timmy said. He booped the mare on the snout. "For that'll do." Suddenly, a trashcan exploded into confetti.
"Derpy! You're invited to Gummy's First Time using personalized Party Cannon Party!" Pinkie exclaimed. She gave Derpy an envelope, before popping back into the trash can.
Derpy blinked as she looked at the envelope, before putting it in her mail bag.
*FLUTTERSHY'S COTTAGE*
Angelo glared as he stared out the door. "Is something wrong Angel?"
Angelo shook his head. "No. Not yet at least." He hopped out the door. "Have dinner ready for me when I get back." He said as he hopped down the path.
Fluttershy let out an eep, and nodded, heading inside. She froze. "Oh my, I almost forgot! Pinkies having a party!"
*SCHOOLHOUSE*
"Are we sure this is a good idea?" Apple Bloom asked.
Scootaloo sighed. "Yes, I'm sure. We moved all the desks outside and gathered as many animals we could. It's perfect."
Button Mash looked at the scene with confusion and curiosity. All the kids were about to go home, when Twist wondered out loud if Winona was the smartest in the class, if she could teach. And so with the supervision of Cheerilee and Applejack, they set up school for animals.
So far Winona wasn't having much luck. "Now students, I now you can all count, but if we could try addition? What's 7 + 12?"
A bluebird count the feathers on her wing, paused, and counted again. "Twwwwenty two?" she asked.
"No, I'm afraid that's wrong." Winona said. She didn't know how to teach, but she was learning that certain of the animals understood different things about math. Birds and dogs knew counting. Ravens and squirrels knew addition, and no on knew multiplication.
"I'm getting bored." Diamond Tiara said. "Let's just face it. Winona is smart, and other animals aren't."
Rumble nodded. "Yeah, it was fun at first, but now it's just dragging on."
Sweetie Belle started to talk, only to let out a shriek as a hawk started attacking everyone.
*CANTERLOT CASTLE*
Fancy Pants talked slowly as he tried to focused. "And so *peck* with this improved crate *peck* design, I believe that *peck* we would lose far less cargo *peck* when deliveries crash-land. *peck*
Pacifica stood on Fancy Pant's head, pecking his face while Tavener slowly clawed his coat.
Celestia was doing her hardest not to laugh, but was finding it rather difficult. "Well, that does sound-" Philomena suddenly flew over to Celestia and started to nibble on her hooves. "P-Philomena" she said, trying not to laugh. "Please stop"
Pacifica looked at Celestia, stared her dead in the eye, then licked Celestia's hoof. A snort escaped her lips. Celestia watched as Philomena then flew away, grabbing Tiberius.
Celestia and Fancy Pants both let out a sigh, before being blasted by a water hose. "SWEET ME THAT'S FREEZING!" Celestia shouted. Fancy Pants let out a yelp as the force of the water shoved him across the room.
*FROG BOTTOM SWAMP*
Hitler stood up. "HA! NOT ENOUGH DEATH CAN STOP" He was squashed flat by a Hydra.
"Dammit Steve you just killed the only other human there was."
"Oh I killed him, huh? We all control the legs Greg."
"Do you think he was tasty?"
"...That's messed up, Bob."
"Well screw you. Also shut up Sam got something to say. Go ahead Sam."
"O-oh. Well I think we just killed Hitler. Maybe."
"Alright, mission accomplished. Send us back God, we did your task."
"..."
"Hey Greg?"
"What, Sam?"
"I don't think it works that way."
Mwuh a masterpiece enjoy I go eat dinner being dead for months works up an appetite.
I am having so much fun with this story.