The Great Equestrian Foam Sword Fight

by crimsongraph


Chapter 3: Of sparkling pies and shimmering butterflies

-({Ponyville airspace} 1:23)-

As the wind rushed by both of the ponies, they continued to stare at the congregation of ponies following them below. Rarity stared with a confused expression, while Fluttershy (bot?) stared down crestfallenly. The mob below only seemed to retaliate the stare, glaring with malice at the duo that flew above.

"...Why are they following us?" Rarity finally spoke up, breaking the tense silence. With a sigh emanating from the machine, Fluttershy continued to stare ahead.

“Rarity, what would you do if a town knows that you and a group of six mares saved Equestria a numerous amount of times?”

“Where are you going with this, dear?”

“Everypony is trying so hard to win the prize. They said that to increase their chances of winning, they would have to eliminate the biggest threat to the prize…” Fluttershy finished the statement with a hint of remorse in her voice. As the words left her mouth, Rarity let out a barely audible gasp.

"Us..." was all the unicorn could say, looking down at the mob following them bellow. On closer inspection, she saw the mob had developed what appeared to be foam pitchforks. On an even closer inspection, the pitchforks were on fire. The foam itself showed no visible signs of combustion, so she ended up assuming it was some form of unicorn wizardry. With a sigh, Rarity gave up looking at the crowd and instead focused on the task at hand.

“Why are the pegasi not following us…?”

As if on cue, a flurry of wings erupted from the crowd. Most of them carried a variety of foamy weapons, be it their original flaming pitchforks or a regular foam sword. One could clearly see their intent to take the duo down in their eyes, the will not to give up visibly flowed through their nimble and light frames. Well, the will not to give up untill they got tired and require a power nap.

Then and then only would they give up the chase and pursue the goal of a nap.

With their window of escape quickly closing, the Flutterbot did the only thing that came to mind. With a quick motion, her metallic wings snapped shut. The congregation of ponies bellow barely managed to dodge the metal machine as it plummeted.

As always, Rarity screamed and flailed all four hooves the way down.

A few seconds passed by, the robot still refusing to open her wings and ride the winds of safety. The crowd above could only stare with confusion at the display, wondering why the duo was not pulling up.

Three seconds from impact, Rarity let out a silent prayer to Celestia. She dared not look at the upcoming ground. Two seconds from impact, the group of pegasus hovering above them quickly looked away, knowing the disastrous impact that was about to occur.

In what appeared to be the span of a few milliseconds, a heavy looking object separated from somewhere inside the robot. As that occurred, Fluttershy quickly pulled up, barely dodging a hug from the solid ground.

The effect she wanted was achieved, as the hunk of metal that was dropped simulated a collision with the ground. Once the piece of metal hit the earth, a dust cloud spread in the surrounding area. The pegasus above only saw the two ponies crash into the ground, resulting with them wincing at the sound of a thud. What remained unseen was the small hole that was made in the dust cloud, and the fact that the Flutterbot was rapidly flying away.

To add to the effect of defeat, the metallic object that was dropped exploded in a shower of sparks and flames. The group of pegasus above only stared down in shock, simply wanting to remove the duo from the competition and not murder them. They remained silent, until a random pony went down to investigate the smoldering crater. After a few tense seconds, the brave pegasus re-emerged from the crater with a look of confusion.

"Does anyone know when the bearers of harmony became robots?"

-({Ponyville park} 1:29 P.M)-

Far away from the explosion, the duo had landed at their designated meeting point. With the thought of safety in their skulls, they let their guard down and simply relaxed. The pair took time to enjoy the evening, basking in the sunlight while they waited for the rest of their friends to arrive.

A solid thirty seconds passed of relaxation, as a sudden cough startled the duo. Right behind them stood the massive group of ponies that were chasing them, excluding the pegasi who had given up and pursued the goal of a power nap.

The congregation of ponies were still wielding their weapons form earlier, magical flaming pitchforks. Both bearers of harmony stared at the crowd, before the Flutterbot simply facehooved.

“Why did I forget that we only got rid of the pegasi of the group?”

And then the bludgeoning began.

-({Ponyville Park} 1:35)-

“And so here we are,” Fluttershy finished the retelling of how they got here, still fighting the ever so growing amounts of ponies. Rarity was still barely managing to defeat competitor after competitor, while Twilight was not fairing any better than her marshmallowy companion. Meanwhile, Pinkie lay in the center of the fighting; eating what appeared to be popcorn and remaining oblivious to the carnage surrounding her.

“Cool story filly, could you tell it again?” Pinkie innocently asked, as a rather sneaky lime green unicorn snuck up behind the pink pony. To the misfortune of the unicorn, an elaborate trap was sprung. A rather comical oversized spring popped out of the ground, sending the poor pony flying.

“Pinkie, could you please help instead of eating popcorn…where did you get popcorn anyways?” The lavender unicorn said, using a regular foamy weapon to violently swing at a pony in front of her.

The pink pony simply pointed to her saddle bags, saying something along the lines of ‘hammerspace’ and ‘the author wanting room for even more creativity’.

"Why did I bother asking... Pinkie, could you at the very least help us?" Twiligh finished by pointing at the mass of ponies in front of her, and the fact that the three ponies were on the verge of being overrun.

"Are you sure about that? You look like you're fine to me," she replied with a small smile, yet her shaking voice told a different story.

'You should let me play Pinkie, it's been so long since I've been outside...' A voice resonated in the mind of the pink pony, a voice she had not heard in a long time. The voice was composed of pure insanity; it sung a serenade of violence. It was the voice of one of her multiple personalities, more specifically the voice of Pinkamena Diane Pie.

'Remember all the fun we had, force feeding pasteries into unsuspecting ponies? Remember the times when we forced towns to try our cherrychimmi changa? I still do, and you should remember the feeling of it all. So I plead you, let me out and you and your friends will win this fight. I'll even promise not to make them cake.'

With the ideas slowly filling her mind, Pinkie's poofy mane slowly began to deflate. Poofy curls soon became straight, as the once bright coloration of the pink pony soon transformed into a pessimistic and dull pink. The once vivid eyes grew into a sadistic glare, as a twisted grin shattered the happy smile worn by Pinkie at all times.

"You wanted my help, so here I am!" The pink pony screamed like a maniac, as she let out an ice cold laughter. The ponies in the immediate vicinity stopped their mindless hitting, and simply stared at the once colorful pony. All the while, she still let out that ice chilling laugh, the laugh of a madmare past redemption.

“All of you,” she pointed to the crowd , before continuing, "thought this would be an easy fight," she paused for a moment, before reaching out a hoof to thin air. A single second passed, as her bright pink saddlebags appeared out of thin air.

"Well, guess what?" she asked the now terrified crowd, as both of her front forehooves dug into the bags. "The battle is just getting started!" Pinkamena shouted out, as she pulled out a pair of foam sabers from the bags. With a wicked glee that froze the group of attacking ponies, and with another bout of laughing, she charged at them with flailing hooves.

The wall of pony was no match for the insane mare, as she effortlessly poured through the congregation while taking down a couple of ponies with her. Behind the wall of pony, she was quickly tearing apart their ranks. From precise hits to sloppy flails, she continued to make the army crumple between her hooves.

With panic spreading through the crowd, Pinkamena went for a more efficient option. A flick of her forehooves was all it took to thrust the handles of the sabers into her waiting jaw. With a sharp snap, both sabers' handles rested comfortably in her mouth.

She looked out to the crowd once again, only to see that in the time it took to preform the small action, the group around her encompassed the pony and effectively sealed her escape. As the ponies around her grew confidence with the fact that they had surrounded the menace, Pinkamena's eyes only shrunk more and her grin became even more twisted.

With a twitch that resonated through the entire frame of the once pink pony, she suddenly vanished. The crowd of ponies around her became confused at the sudden disappearance, as they all moved to the spot where the maniac once occupied. The seed of confusion grew even more in the kinds of the ponies, before a sudden war cry erupted from above.

Above the entire crowd was Pinkamena, who was rapidly falling to the place with the highest pony concentration. The ponies below her could only stare at their demise, as the giggling maniac fell even faster.

With a loud thud that resonated throughout the park, she landed on top of countless ponies that unwillingly cushioned Pinkamena's fall. The fall alone did not cause much damage, but what resulted after did. As soon as she had landed, Pinkamena began to flail her head back and forth. With both sabers still in her hold, it did a massive amount of damage to the surrounding ponies. Their screams of banana went unheard of by the dull pink pony, as she continued to mindlessly pound them with her foamy harbingers of destruction.

Meanwhile, off to the side and a fair distance away from the epicenter of fighting, lay the three other friends of Pinkie. The expressions on their faces each told a different story, Twilight's expression showed a deep fear, Rarity's showed shock, and Fluttershy/bot showed nothing.

Because robots don't have facial expressions, if they did, it would be silly.

"Should we stop her...?" asked a concerned Twilight, who was still watching the carnage as her pink friend tore through the masses of ponies.

"She seems to be having... fun... to say the least," Rarity answered, as Pinkamena began humming a song similar to 'I'm Walking On Sunshine' while an unsuspecting pony slowly snuck up on her.

With a sword at hoof, she made a rapid movement to the unsuspecting pink pony. A short second was all it took before the foamy weapon struck the side of Pinkamena’s head; it was a blow that had somehow managed to knock her off balance and send her sprawling into the dirt.

The effect of the attack shocked the pale cream colored mare. Once the results of defeating a threat settled in, she grew a smile and did a small victory dance that consisted of awkwardly jumping from hoof to hoof. The mare was so enthralled in her jig, she failed to realize the pink mare getting up again. Pinkamena looked different; the once happy and psychotic look that adorned her features was replaced by one of pure hatred.

Pinkamena slowly got up from the spot she lay, and silently made her way to the mare who had supposedly defeated her. Still caught in her victory dance, the mare ignored the actions of the pink one.

The pink mare slowly got behind the still dancing mare, and pulled out both sabers out of her straight locks.

“Should we tell Bon Bon she didn’t defeat Pinkie?” Rarity said, still looking at the dancing mare. Meer centimeters from the ears of Bon Bon, Pinkamena whispered something incomprehensible to the mares off to the side. Whatever it was, it made the once happy mare freeze in fright.

It’s a good thing Pinkamena’s sabers quickly brought the mare out of the shock. Unfortunately, it also brought her into a coma-like state.

“Bon Bon is fine…”

With the defeat of the poor pale cream colored mare, Pinkamena quickly resumed the mindless beating of anything with a pulse.

-({Ponyville Park}2:00 P.M)-

After a solid thirty minutes of intense fighting, and thirty minutes of intense staring from the others, the quadruplet of ponies stared out at the carnage. In total, Pinkie managed to successfully remove an estimated three hundred ponies.

When told the estimation, Pinkie froze up and closed her eyes. It seemed like she was fighting with a part of her mind, but the world may never know. With the lengthy battle finished, and the worry of being ambushed by another group of ponies present, the bearers of harmony decided to continue to moving. With their destination unknown, they quickly returned to Ponyville to gather last minute supplies.

Said supplies consisted of a map, a compass, food, and sleeping bags. With the materials for survival ready, they hurriedly left Ponyville.

After a solid minute of walking, Pinkie asked the studious unicorn, “Hey, Twi, where are we going?”

“We,” Twilight paused for dramatic effect. “Are headed to Canterlot.”









































“But why?” Pinkie responded.


“I honestly have no idea."