Nightmare Moon stared out over her land, watching the sun, her sister’s sun, bring light and warmth long barren of it. The song had faded, but it still echoed in her mind. The lullaby of a sister, now gone. Her horn lit once more and the song started once more. But lullaby’s were her domain, those of the night. And she reshaped the words, into something new. Something hers. Something… she hoped could bring peace to her ponies, even if they never heard it.
“Once did a pony who was freed from the moon look out on her kingdom in pain. She jeered and she said with such hate in her heart, ‘The sun shall never be seen again.’ So harsh was her cruelty and so brilliant her rage that great was the shadow she cast. Which fell dark upon the poor ponies she loved and grew only darker as her hurt and ache did last.”
It wasn’t her best work, but Luna shaped and molded the words still, struggling to create something out of this pain in her heart. “My dear ponies, know that I love you so, please rest now in my firm embrace. Hear please this lullaby, though my heart shattered first, through disregard and through suffering and through rage. Feel the peace and warmth of this day and please melt my sorrow in kind. Ponies, your love is wanted so much more than you know. Please help me to learn to be kind…”
“Soon did that queen take notice that one pony did give her what she thought was her due. Never did she question that what she offered was wanted by a pony like her, she ignored it as her pony’s pain grew. But such is the way of such heartache, it often does blind the love of its host. So that foolish queen took what she had demanded, causing the destruction of what she wanted most.”
Tears flowed down Nightmare Moon’s cheeks, though Luna refused to stop. Pain she deserved, pain she would suffer. Even if all it did was delay the pain she would inflict on those ponies around her. If only it filled her with enough shame that she wouldn’t harm them again, enforce her will on them once more. She didn’t have the strength to stop this, to truly give in, but she would delay it. “My dear ponies know I love you so, please learn to want my embrace. Bear up my vow, oh stars of the sky, through tears and through aches and through pain. Bring my heart peace and love so I may try to learn to be kind. Change is so much harder than I knew, but for them the strength I will find. Please forgive me and learn to be mine...”
Was it enough? Could it ever be enough? She couldn’t undo what she had done. She could never not be a monster. Luna could not exist, but nor could Nightmare Moon. Not as she was. She felt her sister’s sun warming her yet, piercing through to her bones. Encouraging, despite all she had done. She almost swore she could hear her sister’s voice with her own. “The years now before us, fearful and unknown. I never realized I couldn’t face them on my own. May no more sorrowful winters silently pass I plead. I need you, I fear you, all this time away...”
Nightmare Moon’s gaze turned away from her kingdom. Down. She had given the physical light back to her pony’s. But could she return the light to herself? Be like her ponies needed her to be? Dare she? No matter how little power her sister had, to even give a hint of her return, what would her ponies do?
Yet…
How many of her ponies had she nearly destroyed? How many had she nearly killed? Was this what happened when her power was truly allowed without restraint, when there was nopony who she could look to? How long until that darkness swept over her again and her ponies once more felt her ire?
But if she did such a thing, it would weaken her. Not physically, not magically, but emotionally. She would be making herself vulnerable. To the pony who had hurt her the most. Despite her power, it terrified her.
The only thing that scared her more was herself.
Those last lines played once more, this time, one last vow to herself and to those she loved. One sung so often to her, yet now she wished for it to spread to her ponies, not her. “May all your fears be gone today, safe in the warmth of her gentle light. And know not our sadness, pain or fear. And when the sun sets I’ll try to bear this great despair…”
Nightmare Moon held up her hooves to stare at them. How much of blood would be spilled before she learned her lesson? How many more must suffer before she would be sated?
This must be her last chance. Her final fall. She had hurt so many ponies… If nopony else could keep her in check, then it must be her. No matter the price to her.
Nightmare Moon disappeared from the roof, leaving nothing but scorch marks where she had been. Even if it weakened her, even if it destroyed her, she required something to reign her in. She had to change. Discord was right about that.
There was only one pony left for her now, no matter how much it hurt. No matter how much it destroyed her. No matter how much it killed her. For a moment, her steps through the crystal lined cavern faltered.
But only a moment more before the memories of her bard begging for mercy flashed through her mind. The thoughts of Moondancer, a pony who bore such scars both physical and emotional that so closely resembling her own, bloody and broken.
Princess Celestia could never return while she reigned.
But, no matter how much she denied it, no matter how much she fought it, one thing was clear to her.
Even if there was only enough space in Equestria for a single princess, one powerful queen, there would have to be space for her sister. If not for her sake, then for her ponies.
Nightmare Moon froze in place, her eyes locked on the sleeping alicorn, wreathed in chains. She couldn’t do this. If she did it, if even the smallest hint of Celestia’s return was to leak out, then…
Then what? Nightmare Moon might lose her temper? Hurt them more? No. Never again. She had crossed a line this time, even she could see that. She had done what could not be undone. No matter how desperately she wished it could. Slowly she stepped forward.
Celestia’s eyes opened when she was halfway to her. “Luna?” the princess asked.
“You… said once, that you would wait for us… for me, forever,” Nightmare Moon said softly. “I said I… I would never trust you again. I said I wouldn’t believe your lies.”
“Luna…” Celestia said softly.
Luna stopped a few steps from the princess, staring at her. If she did this, it would be another thing she could never take back. It could very well set her on the path to her very destruction. Her end. No more eternal banishment. Merely the destruction of all that she was. Because there would be no more Mare in the Moon. Never again. There would only be her… or the Princess of the Sun.
“Tia… I… I’ve ruined everything,” Luna said softly. “We can’t… I can’t do this on my own. I can’t… I can’t… do this… I can’t. There’s no more…” She leaped forward and hugged her sister once more, banishing the chains around her.
“Luna?” Celestia asked.
“Tia… I’m scared,” Luna whispered. “I’ve done so many terrible, terrible things… I’ve hurt so many ponies. I’m not sure what I’ll do next. I’m so, so terrified that I truly am just the nightmare. I need to change, I need to be better, but I don’t know how.”
“Luna,” Celestia said softly, her wings once more enveloping her sister and holding her close. “You… I…”
“I don’t know what to do anymore,” Luna whispered. “I have ruined everything. I’ve… I’ve…” Then, for the first time in a thousand years, she told her sister. Everything.
Everything that had transpired. Every ache. Every pain. Every joy. Every fear. Every lie. Every deceit. Every moment of jealousy. Every single mistake. From the moment she had first begun to feel like her ponies no longer cared for her, to the talk with Discord.
When all was said and done, Luna didn’t know what to do. She felt so tired, so spent, so hollow. Yet she also felt so free. But then her gaze raised and she stared into her sister’s eyes.
She saw fear and sadness. The tears trailing down her sister’s face. “Tia?” Luna asked softly. “What… do I do?”
Celestia stared at her and then, so soft even Luna could barely hear it, she answered. “I do not know.”
“W-what?” Luna asked.
“I do not know,” Celestia said softly. “Oh Luna, I’m so sorry.”
“But you… you…” Luna said softly, her body shaking. “You always have the answer. Sister?”
“Oh Luna,” Celestia said softly. “I know not what the future will bring. But… I…”
“You hate us too, do you?” Luna asked and started to pull back.
“I hate me,” Celestia said.
“W-what?” Luna asked, staring at the mare.
“Luna,” Celestia said softly, her hoof reaching out to stroke her sister’s cheek. “You have become something you were never meant to be. It was no mistake that three of the elements chose you.”
“But they all chose you,” Luna said bitterly.
“Laughter, honesty, loyalty,” Celestia said softly, ignoring her little sister’s remark. “A pony who delighted in mirth and play, who now feels nothing but pain in their laughter. A pony who was true to her word, who became afraid to speak the truth for fear of scorn. A pony so loyal, who cares so deeply for the ponies in her care that she eventually shatters and cuts them on the very edges of her broken heart. You did change into something else.”
“Then how do we--”
“But you didn’t do it alone,” Celestia said softly, looking into Luna’s eyes. “Nopony is meant to be alone, Luna. Not you, not I, none of us. We may not always realize it, but we do need our ponies. Nightmare Moon may be you, but she was not created by you alone. You made mistakes, but you were not the only one. There were times I could have prevented this. There were times others could have prevented this. There were times you could have prevented this. But what is done has been done. It cannot be undone. It took so many of us to make you this. Perhaps, eventually, we can make you who you were again.”
“What if I can’t change?” Luna asked softly.
“You can change, dear sister,” Celestia said, just as softly.
“And if I can’t? What if it’s impossible? What if I just hurt my ponies again?” Luna asked.
“I refuse to believe you can’t return to me, Luna,” Celestia said softly.
“Why?” Luna asked.
“Because I took from you your laughter, your loyalty and your honesty,” Celestia said gently. “I will carry them until the day you are ready to take them back. Because you are my little sister and I hurt you more than you ever deserved. Because I failed to love you the way you needed. Because I never protected you when I should have.”
“Tia…”
“Because I failed,” Celestia said softly. “For a thousand years I failed.” Her wings tightened around the other alicorn, the tears going down her face and leaking onto her sister. “For a thousand years I’ve gone over what I had done to you, what I put you through. How much I hurt you. I won’t lose you again. I can’t lose you again. I’m not… I’m not strong enough, Luna. I can’t do it. I don’t care what terrible things you’ve done, because I know that’s not the pony you are. I know that pony inside. The pony who stood by me against Discord. The pony who refused to abandon me even though it meant she had to face the windigo. My sister. I know you’re still in there. You have to be…”
“Tia?” Luna asked.
“Because if you’re not…” Celestia said softly, giving a sob that Luna had only heard the likes of in her most frightened and painful of dreams. “Because if you’re not in there, if you’re gone, my dear sister. If I’ve managed to snuff that side of you out so thoroughly that you can never return to me? Then it matters not what happens to me. I’ve done so much worse than merely murdering a pony. I’ve slain the very soul of the pony who I, more than any other, was supposed to protect. So I will wait, I will endure, I will suffer if that’s what you need from me. Because I know you will return to me. Because… Because I…” Celestia choked on the words for a moment, trying to get them out. “Because I… I r-refuse to believe… I refuse to believe that the Elements of Harmony forced us… us to endure a t-thousand years of this torture… just for me t-to lose you again. I can’t b-bear it. I… I won’t.”
“But what if I hurt more ponies?” Luna asked.
“You will come back to me,” Celestia said gently.
“And if it takes a hundred years?” Luna asked.
“Then I will endure a hundred years,” Celestia said gently.
“And if Equestria is in ruins?” Luna asked.
“Then we will fix it together,” Celestia said.
“How can you say that?!” Luna asked, staring up at her. “Don’t you even care?”
“Luna,” Celestia said softly. “I can’t do this without you. Not anymore. The only way that Equestria will ever again have a Celestia worthy of it, is if there is a Luna besides her. I will wait as long as possible for that future.”
“And if Equestria will never forgive us?” Luna asked.
“Then I will spend a thousand years showing them the Luna I know,” Celestia said.
“And if… we… can never forgive us?” Luna asked softly, her eyes lowering.
Celestia went silent.
“Well?” Luna asked. “What then, dear sister?”
“I do not know,” Celestia said softly. “I’ve never figured out how to forgive myself. I can only hope that… we can learn. Together.”
Luna stared at her before, very slowly, pulling away. Nightmare Moon stared down at the fallen princess.
No. It was all lies. She couldn’t…
No.
NO.
Even as that rage threatened to boil over again, Nightmare Moon shoved it aside. She would not allow herself to be that anymore. Her student bore the brutality of her anger. It could no longer be allowed to be free. Neither could she, at least not fully.
“Your isolation here will end, sister,” Nightmare Moon said.
“Luna?” Celestia asked.
“Nightmare Moon,” the queen said, correcting her. “We have made too many mistakes as of late. It has caused us to harm our ponies, to destroy, to hurt. It has caused us to become a true monster. It has cost us so much we held dear. It has turned all our greatest fears into reality. We must be better. If we cannot…” Nightmare Moon glanced around at the crystals. “We require an advisor. A pony who we can… who can guide us. We will not return your power. Nor will we grant you your freedom. But… we will allow you a place where you can be easier for us to see. Perhaps even… a place where others may see you.”
“Sister?” Celestia asked.
“The sun has risen once more across Equestria, a light to bring them warmth. Should we, should I lapse again, I will crush it. I will drive them back to the darkness,” Nightmare Moon said. “I had forgotten what the sun was, how warm its glow. What it meant. If you truly meant what you said, then take my offer. Help me to be the pony our ponies deserve.”
Luna turned and looked to Celestia, before feeling more tears start to fall once more. “Please… sister. I cannot do this alone.”
Celestia stared at her, before, very slowly, she got to her hooves. Then, very slowly, she nodded. She then walked after the mare, once more through the crystal caverns.
No matter what Nightmare Moon said, however, Celestia felt a new light inside herself. Because for the first time in well over a thousand years, it all seemed like her wait was nearly over. Though she could never make up for the pain her actions had inflicted, for the grief she had caused, she would try. With her younger sister by her side she believed she would even succeed.
Because Luna would come home.
Before they could go too far, however, Nightmare Moon paused. “Tia?”
“Yes?” Celestia asked.
“How did Moondancer get her cutie mark?” Nightmare Moon asked.
Celestia was silent for a few moments before shaking her head. “I could tell you, dear sister, but I could never do it justice. Neither could Moondancer. My advice, if you’d take it, is to ask her sister. Of all the ponies in Equestria, she is likely the only pony who could truly share the tale.”
“We see,” Nightmare Moon said, before she began walking again. She would need to make another trip, soon. Possibly as Nightmare Moon. Perhaps it was time that the ruler visit some of the more… distant cities of her domain.