Cheerilee sat in her booster chair in a corner booth of her parents' restaurant. The wallpaper and the decorations were all new, her father having put them up just the past weekend. Seated beside her was a large chimichanga, its height almost double the height that the foal would have been if she had been standing up. On her other side stood her parents. Her father’s mane had only begun to gray, and lines formed at the corners of his eyes as he smiled down at her in anticipation. Her mother’s mane had been pulled back into a wavy ponytail and held in place by a brightly colored scrunchie that Cheerilee liked to play with when her mother wasn’t looking.
“You know, we made that for you to celebrate our move, right?” her mother asked. She gestured with her nose at the tower of food beside Cheerilee.
“Oh, Hon, don’t worry about her too much. We haven’t been here long. Our little cherry is probably just nervous. Isn’t that right, baby girl?” her dad responded with wink. “Your mother’s right though. You should eat it before it gets cold.”
Little Cheerilee looked towards the giant chimichanga on her left before replying, “I’m not nervous papá, see?” As those words left her mouth, she gently bit into it. The texture was different than the usual, smaller chimichangas that her mother usually made. It felt hairier than usual, as well--a lot hairier. Also, it’s taste was off. Behind the sweet flavor of cherry that made up its filling was a more sickly sweet and almost sour aftertaste that overpowered the cherry flavor. Something was definitely off about it, but her parents were watching. She couldn’t disappoint them. Cheerilee decided to lick the filling to get a better taste in the hope that the previous wrong taste had been just her imagination. As she leaned forward and tasted it for the second time the Chimichanga let out an ear-splitting scream causing Cheerilee to wince in pain. The searing ache in her brain caused the world around her to disintegrate.
As she opened her eyes, the brightly lit and decorated diner was replaced with a dark, blurry bedroom, and the screaming chimichanga was replaced with an equally as blurry unicorn mare who was attempting to escape Cheerilee’s limp forelegs. Cheerilee released the struggling stranger from her leaden limbs which caused the unicorn to fumble off of the twin-sized mattress and onto the ground letting out a yelp as she landed causing both mares to groan as the sound helped to intensify the sharp pains in both of their skulls.
Cheerilee closed her eyes once again and wiped the grogginess from them. “Where am I? Wait, who are you?” she asked as her hazy eyes slowly took in a room that looked like a furniture store’s attempt to depict an unrealistically orderly schoolgirl’s bedroom before focusing as clearly as she was capable of on the pony who had fallen onto the floor. She was a younger and vaguely familiar unicorn mare, very purple, and sporting bedhead so outlandish that it was a certain kind of impressive.
For her part, Twilight took a moment to process her situation. Although her dull, throbbing headache protested even the low light present in the room, she was immediately able to recognize the room that she had spent much of her childhood in. The pale coat of dust that rested on everything made her entertain for just a moment the notion that she had miscast some time spell that she had found in the forbidden section of the palace archive. that the room was not the only thing covered in subverting gross suddenly became apparent. “Ew, what is this stuff on me?” she said before a stray beam of light hit her square in the face making her pinch her eyes closed again.
Shielding her face with a forehoof, Twilight cracked her eyes open again and gazed up in silence at the stranger who was lying prone in Twilight’s childhood bed. Memories of re-shelving books (by Spike, mostly) following the prepubescent tornado that would touch down in her library every week flashed in her aching head, and Twilight was able to pick the image of the mare before her out of them. “You’re Sweetie Belle's teacher, the one who likes to assign book reports. Why are we in my-”
“The librarian,” Cheerilee exclaimed. Upon hearing the name of one of the world’s three most adorable natural disasters a survival instinct had kicked in and gave her a moment of clarity. “Oh, Dear Celestia, of all the ponies...”
A light knock on Twilight’s bedroom door spooked both of them, their ears reaching for the ceiling. The pain that the jolt caused in Cheerilee’s head made her wince and cover her eyes. Twilight was too in the moment for a little thing like the worst headache of her life to distract her from the freak out that was bubbling up inside her. Fearing that there was somehow a disappointed Princess Celestia behind the door in this crazy nightmare, she called out to the entity, “Daddy?”
“It’s just me,” Shining said as he eased the door open so as to give the room’s occupants time to make themselves decent, “Don’t worry, Twi, my eyes are closed just in case you two are, uh, yeah, just in case.” After a brief moment of silence and with great hesitation he opened his eyes. “Wow, you look even worse than you did last night,” he remarked as he studied the bewildered mare sitting lopsided on the bed as his little sister was sprawled out on the floor. Twilight’s fur was matted with dried vomit, and the hair on the side of her face was brushed upward in a fresh wet cowlick. Shining decided that he really didn’t want to know anything about that.
“Are they awake honey?” echoed Cadance's pleasant voice from down the hall. The presence of someone beyond Twilight’s little room gave both her and Cheerilee a sense of reassurance that this wasn’t just some crazy dream, and the pair began to think about how they had arrived in their situation.
“Yes, Dear,” Shining replied before turning his attention back to the bedroom without actually looking at the two mares, “I would ask you two if you want breakfast, but it’s already like eleven-something. You know where the kitchen is. Cadance has to get back to the castle, and I have to pull guard duty soon. Oh, and the bathroom’s down the hall. Smells like you need it.” he forced a weak chuckle that turned into an awkward cough before he left the room, closing the door behind himself.
Cheerilee cleared her throat, catching the attention of Twilight. “So, about last night…”
Twilight’s ears perked up. She wasn’t sure if what Cheerilee had to say was going to be embarrassing or not, but it would be new data which was something that she was desperately lacking at the moment. She waited for Cheerilee to continue.
She continued in a tentative voice, afraid of offending Twilight, “What happened exactly?”
Twilight slumped in disappointment. “I’m not sure, but I’m going to go take a shower.” Twilight said as she pulled herself up. “Maybe not being covered in… whatever this is will help me think.”
Cadance fidgeted in her seat on the plush living room sofa as she waited for her husband to return from checking up on his little sister. Her ears flicked toward the stairway when she heard his hasty steps descending to the main floor. She verbally pounced before Shining had time to take a seat, “So, what are they to each other? Did you get her name?”
“I think I walked in on something I shouldn’t have,” Shining said as he eased himself into the sofa beside her, “but at least I’m ten bits richer now.”
“That’s five bits, hot shot, unless her name also just happens to be Fluttershy,” Cadance said with a knowing smirk. “So, tell me, what exactly did you see to make you think you won that five?”
Shining Armor looked his wife in the eyes the way that he always would when he was serious about something. “Well, I went up to her room because we heard that loud thump, right? When I got to the door I heard them talking like they were excited about something.”
Cadance interrupted, “What were they saying?”
“I couldn’t make it out through the door, so I knocked. They didn’t answer, and the voices stopped, you know, like Twiley always does when she thinks she’s been caught doing something bad.” He screwed up his face in a grimace and continued, “Okay, in this situation I really didn’t want to catch her doing anything, so I knocked again and told them that I was going to open the door. The first thing I noticed is that the hair on Twiley’s face was all smeared up like someone thought that she was an ice cream cone, and she was on the floor next to her bed like she had just fallen out of it with, um, her friend sitting on the bed with her front legs up like she had been holding her. It didn’t help that Twiley was making that face—you know the one.”
“The one that she made when I caught her stealing your father’s library card?” Cadance guessed, nodding her head as if she already knew.
“That’s the one. I just noped out of there at that point,” Shining admitted as he lightly shook his head in embarrassment.
“Oh come on, Shiney! I’ve known that mare since she was a foal. There’s no way she’d be swapping spit first thing in the morning. You know how she is about bacteria.” Cadance put on her Twilight impression, “Don’t you know that the mouth is the dirtiest part of a pony’s body?”
Shining cut his snickering short when the sound of running water from the upstairs bathroom signaled that somepony was up and taking a shower. It was soon followed by the sound of unsure hoof steps making their way down the staircase and into the room. The married couple turned their heads to the stairwell and found a disheveled Cheerilee staring with twitching eyes at the Junior Princess of Equestria and the big stallion from before who, now that she thought about it, looked an awful lot like the framed pictures of the Captain of the Royal Guard that were hanging on the walls of this relative palace of a house.
“Um, good morning, Your Ladyship, Officer,” Cheerilee choked out. Unsure whether this situation called for a bow or a curtsy, she dropped into a deep knee-bending half-bow/half-curtsy. Oh, Sweet Princess, what have I gotten myself into?
Cadance took a second to consider how best to handle the not-yet panicking earth pony before deciding to attempt her aunt’s go-to tactic for engaging commoners: being the embodiment of benign motherly benevolence. “Good morning, um, Miss. Please, do join my husband and I while we wait for Twilight to finish her shower.” She gestured towards the matching couch opposite of the one that she and her husband were using.
“Uh-of course, Your Ladyship. Please, call me Cheerilee,” Cheerilee responded with a diminishing tremor in her voice. Having something to do in the moment helped her to think through her nerves. As she made her way to the proffered couch, she thought, The librarian’s name is Twilight, and she knows the junior princess who is married to the Captain of the Guard. That means that this is probably their home, and they’re not here to throw me into the dungeons. She took a calming breath as she eased into the surprisingly soft seat.
“It is good to meet you, Miss Cheerilee, but please just call me Cadance. This is Shining Armor, my husband and Twilight’s older brother,” Cadance said with a nod of her head to Shining during which their eyes met. “I hadn’t been expecting Twilight to visit, let alone to bring another mare with her, but then again she probably hadn’t been expecting it either,” Cadance finished, letting out a dry laugh.
Cheerilee took the implication that this little tête-à-tête was an interrogation—a ‘meet the family’ event. “Well, neither had I,” Cheerilee added with a dry laugh of her own that was too nervous to match Cadance’s.
“So, how long have you and my little sister known each other?” Shining asked, sensing his wife’s attempt at getting information with leading statements going south.
“Oh erm, well, she runs Ponyville's library, and I teach at the elementary school. We sometimes run into each other when I assign research projects. I'm pretty sure that we met shortly after she moved to town,” Cheerilee responded, fiddling with her forehooves. Seriously, Cheerilee? He’s her brother. Of course he knows what she does for work.
Shining smiled, trying to calm Cheerilee down. “You’re a teacher? Now, don’t get me wrong. I like foals and all, but I would never want to deal with them for hours every day.”
Cadance turned her much less than benevolent gaze on her husband, and without a single word let him know what the mistake that he had just made was.
Shining tried to not acknowledge the moment and move on. “Although sometimes I think they’d behave better than the castle guards,” he said with a weak laugh.
“Normally I say that the parents are the real troublemakers, but this year’s class of foals is a real hoof-full. Oh, they’re just the sweetest little angels one minute, but the next they are drugging you, barricading you inside a changing room, and trying to marry you off to their big brother at the bottom of a pit,” Cheerilee said in a light tone that left Cadance and Shining Armor wondering just how serious she was being.
“You’re talking about the Cutie Mark Crusaders,” Twilight said from the hall as she made her way to the living room, her coat still damp and her mane still a mess after her shower.
Cadance looked back and forth from Twilight to Cheerilee, concern growing as she found no sign from either of them that they were joking. “Wait. You’re… That actually happened? Who are these foals?”
Twilight trotted around the back of the sofa that Cheerilee was sitting on and took a seat at the other end. “You met them before. They were the ring-bearers at your wedding.”
Cadance’s jaw dropped. “The ring-bearers? But they were just the most darling little…”
“The most darling little natural disasters in Equestria,” Cheerilee sing-songed with an enormous grin before she wheeled on Twilight. “Wait, you let them near a wedding?”
“Yeah,” Cadance interjected, throwing Twilight a disapproving look. “You could have warned me. Well, no, I guess you couldn’t, could you?” She cleared her throat.
Cheerilee felt the moment of silence after Cadance's look to be awkward, so she decided to try to and continue the conversation topic. “Like I said they’re a hoof-full, but they really do mean well. They’re good children. It’s just that they’re also the most challenging students I have taught in my entire career.”
Cadance took a second to process that before she looked up at Cheerilee with glint in her eye. “Speaking of your career, where did you get your degree? Does Ponyville have a university? If you don’t mind me asking, that is.”
Oh, dear, the interrogation is back on. “I actually went to Canterlot Academy for my degree. Class of 2010,” Cheerilee replied
“No way!” Shining gasped, “You went to the same school as us, and you were in the same graduating class?”
“I-I guess so” Cheerilee sputtered, taken back by Shining's sudden interjection.
“I didn’t think you were the type to go for older girls, Twilight.” Shining said, with a wink and a teasing smirk.
“Wait, what?” Twilight and Cheerilee exclaimed in unison like an old married couple.
“Hey, hey, there’s no judgment here, none at all.” Shining waved his forehooves in front of his face as if deflecting misunderstandings, “I didn’t know that you liked mares, but I promise I won’t treat you any differently.”
Twilight narrowed her eyes at Shining Armor. “Well, thanks for the unconditional acceptance, Big Brother, but we are not…” She waved her forelegs like a third base umpire calling a runner safe. “I don’t even like mares. Not that I have anything against mares, but- uh, I mean, some of my best friends are mares—all of them are, really.” Her left eye twitched at a stray thought that popped up in her head before she stuffed it into the “Requires Future Study” section of her brain.
“Um, I also don’t, you know, swing that way, just for the record,” Cheerilee quickly added, her pink cheeks darkening to a candy apple red.
“Well, this is awkward,” Shining stated the obvious, at a loss for how to move past the embarrassing moment.
Cadance came to his rescue, a common occurrence that seemed to happen whenever something of importance was happening. “Well, now that we know what didn’t happen, why don’t we talk about what did happen last night? At least we could clear up any misunderstandings.”
Twilight nodded, “Yes, we should compile all the information that we have.” She turned to address Cheerilee at the opposite arm of the couch, “My night began with the girls talking me into going out with them to a bar. I stuck to tea, but Rarity got just a little tipsy. She started arguing with the bartender and did that ‘walking out in a huff’ thing that she does when she’s upset. I followed her to keep her out of trouble…” Twilight’s eyes went wide, and she looked at Cadance, Shining Armor, and Cheerilee in turn. “What happened to Rarity? We went to another bar where we met you,” Twilight pointed a hoof at Cheerilee, “You started talking about doughnuts, and that’s all I can remember.”
“Doughnuts?” Cadance asked. Twilight, still tearing through her memories to discover what happened to her friend, nodded in response.
“I’m afraid I don’t really remember your friend,” Cheerilee said, “But I do remember something about doughnuts. I also remember somepony threatening to call the city guards on us.” She favored Shining Armor with a nervous smile.
Shining hooted a laugh. “I can’t wait to hear the rest of this story when one of you finally remembers it all.” He leaned over the table between the twin sofas and gave Twilight a look that would have been pointed if not for the grin curling the corners of his mouth. “And you have to spill if there’s a report on you at the guard house.”
Twilight slumped in her seat and flattened her ears.
He continued, “But Cady and I already know the best part of the story. We were getting ready to go to bed when we heard banging on the front door. When we open it, there are the two of you so wasted that you can hardly stand, and, sure enough, you both fall down and throw up all over the steps. Bleh!” Shining stuck out his tongue and points at the back of his mouth to mimic vomiting.
When Cadance failed to cover her own giggling with a cough, Twilight uttered a groan of despair. “At least no pony else knows about this right now. Can you two please promise me that you won’t tell anypony else about this? Knowing Rarity and Pinkie Pie, if they hear about this all of Ponyville will know the story before we’ve gotten our bags off the train.”
Cheerilee leaned in and pleaded, “Um, could I also ask that you keep quiet about it? Rumors have a tendency to get out of control, and a rumor like this one is just the kind of thing that would be brought up in a PTA meeting.” At the very least keep it from Colgate. That mare couldn’t keep a secret to save her life.
“Aw, come on, I finally have something embarrassing to tease you about, and you want us to keep it a secret?” Shining whined with an exaggerated sigh of disappointment. “It’s totally not fair. I mean, you never do anything to get in trouble.” His eyes trailed up and away, and he tapped his chin with his forehoof. “Although earlier I did hear something about your doll, Smarty Pants-”
Wild-eyed, Twilight sprang out of her seat and declared, “I invoke The Charter!” When she realized that Cadance and Cheerilee were looking at her like she was crazy, she cleared her throat and continued, “The Light Siblings’ Charter—specifically the ‘No Snitching’ article—prohibits the telling of any embarrassing or incriminating stories, recounts, or descriptions to any figure of authority or to anyone who might tell a figure of authority.”
Shining Armor rolled his eyes, “You can’t be serious, Twi. We made that up when we were little foals.”
Twilight nodded; her eyes lidded in smug satisfaction. “And the Preamble states that our siblinghood is forever, and thus the rules of the Charter are to last in perpetuity.”
“That sounds pretty binding to me, Hun,” Cadance teased while affecting her most regal posture. “As a junior princess I hereby recognize The Light Siblings Charter and promise that neither I nor my husband will snitch…” she suppressed a giggle, “…about the events of last night to anyone.”
Twilight sighed in relief. “Thanks, Cadance.”
“Yes, thank you very much, Your Ladyship,” Cheerilee added, relaxing for the first time that morning.
Cadance stood from her seat and motioned for Shining Armor to follow her, which he did. “Any time, Ladybug. Now, Shining and I really should be getting back to the castle.”
As the couple trotted to the front door, Shining Armor chuckled, “Yeah, I need to check the wanted list for any drunken purple unicorn mares,” which earned him a snarky fake laugh from Twilight.
In the doorway, Cadance stopped Shining and looked him in the eye with a smoldering gaze, “Now, you be nice to your sister, and I’ll be nice to you.” She leaned in for a kiss.
Shining ducked and slipped past her and onto the steps. “Sorry, Cady, but the ‘No Gross Stuff’ article of The Charter strictly prohibits us from kissing anyone except our parents or grandparents.”
“Hey, I have an amendment for you,” Cadance declared before chasing him into the street.
Cheerilee smiled as the royal couple galloped out into the Canterlot streets to play like children. As the excitement and shock of watching a princess of Equestria and the Captain of the Guard calling each other by cutsey nicknames and arguing over a childhood game wore off, her headache—forgotten before—once again became noticeable. The feeling of being in over her head followed on its heels.
Poor little Cheerilee was sitting in the home of royalty with a princess’s sister-in-law. What have I gotten myself into this time? She took a moment to take a good look around the room. The off-white walls and a full set of matching birch furniture, tastefully spaced along the walls, were understated and thus allowed the many portraits of Twilight and Shining Armor at various ages to grab all the attention. It was the home of doting parents who would no doubt ill-appreciate a low-class schoolteacher leading their precious daughter on a drunken late-night quest for doughnuts. Very rich and very powerful parents, Cheerilee thought as she spotted a framed picture of Shining Armor receiving a medal from Princess Celestia herself.
I really should be going, she thought, but where? She was somewhere in a rich neighborhood where she had probably never been before, and she had no idea where the hotel that she and her friends were staying at was relative to herself. “Twilight, could I ask you for a favor?” Cheerilee asked, turning to the mare beside her.
“I don’t mind if you need to take a shower,” Twilight started, turning her head towards Cheerilee. “It's the second door upstairs.”
Cheerilee awkwardly kneaded the cushioned fabric beneath her hooves. “Thanks for offering. I’d like to take you up on that, but I sort of, well, forgot where I was staying in Canterlot. Would you help me find my hotel,” she turned to face Twilight. “I don’t want to impose, but-” Cheerilee stopped short of finishing her sentence as she noticed their muzzles were inches apart.
Both mares locked eyes with each other for a moment before Twilight hopped to her hooves from the couch. “Of course!” she exclaimed before cantering to the hall. “I, uh- I should probably get you a towel for the shower. You probably don’t want to go outside looking like that, not that you look bad or anything. I think you look good, I mean, not like that—not like my brother thought I meant.” She forced a weak laugh. “Anyway—towel.”
“Are- Are you sure?” Cheerilee said, flustered at the awkward compliment that Twilight had given her. “About the shower, I mean,” she added when Twilight wheeled on her, her eyes wide with fear. “I could just take one later. After all, I’m already asking your help with directions.”
Twilight waved her off. “I’m sure you would do the same for me. At least I think you would given what little I know about you, which isn’t really enough. I mean, uh,” her mind raced trying to get her train of thought back on its rails. “You like doughnuts, so you must, um- you know what? I’m just going to get a towel now.” Twilight fled down the hall.
“I’ll, uh, I’ll go take a shower then,” Cheerilee said to herself and the now empty living room.
Cheerilee glanced around the bathroom as she entered, the room was twice the size of her modest bathroom at home, and its every surface was clean and gleaming like an ad in a magazine. I wish my bathroom looked like this, Cheerilee lamented as she stepped into the room. Just behind her, the sound of hoof falls approached.
“I brought the towel,” Twilight said as she trotted into the room with purpose before removing a folded plush white terry cloth bath towel from her back and hanging it on a chromed towel rack by hoof. “If you need anything I’ll be in the living room.”
“Thank you,” Cheerilee replied as she glanced around the room, avoiding Twilight’s eyes. She noticed the shower fixtures that were on the wall of the walk-in rain-style shower. “Uh, Twilight which of these is for hot water?” Cheerilee asked, stopping Twilight before she could escape into the hallway.
In a hurry, Twilight wheeled about and stepped around Cheerilee’s right side. “Here, let me show you,” she said, her front legs just beyond the threshold of the shower stall. “This knob,” she indicated with her nose, “is for hot water and the other one is for cold water. And this,” she said, taking a step to her left to poke her nose at a lever. She stopped short as she realized that she had brushed herself up against Cheerilee. Both blushed at the contact as Twilight tried to get her mind back on the lesson, and an awkward silence filled the room. “This opens the spigot to make the water come down. I, uh, I’ll be in the living room then,” she finished in a weak voice and all but fled the bathroom.
“Thanks again,” Cheerilee mumbled as Twilight cantered beyond the door frame, closing the door behind her with a light kick. She felt herself tremble with anxiety. Relax Cheerilee. You didn’t do anything with her last night except vomit and pass out, as if that weren’t embarrassing enough. Cheerilee stepped into the shower and fiddled with the knobs for a moment before using her foreleg to drop the lever that poured warm, calming water over her head and back.
She stood under the sprinkling downpour, her eyes closed as her mind drifted. For a moment, she imagined herself as one of Daisy’s potted plants getting its weekly drink from the florist's watering can before the awkwardness of her most recent interaction with Twilight refused to be ignored anymore. Soon you’ll be back in Ponyville in your homey little apartment with its low-flow shower/bath combo and threadbare towels. You and the librarian will go back to only seeing each other on book report days at the library with excited foals all around, and you will never bring up last night again. Cheerilee inhaled deeply, envisioning herself going back to her daily schedule and finishing with a long sigh. Her thoughts turned to the fantastic, to high tea with a giggling princess who had insisted upon referring to her by a silly nickname, to being escorted around the rich district with its high-class speakeasies and doughnut shoppes, to satin bed sheets and decadently soft upholstered sofas—each shared with a warm and familiar companion. Maybe my friends are right that I need to get out more. Maybe I’m just lonely.
~~
What in Equestria was that? Twilight thought as she stood in front of the bathroom door she had just abruptly shut, taking a few breaths as the heat pooling in her head and the nervous fluttering in her stomach faded. Wasn't there an article in the Canterlot Journal of Medicine that said that hangovers sometimes cause stomach conditions? Twilight tarried a moment as she tried to recall other potential causes of her symptoms before the dull remnants of the headache that she had woken up with shut down her thought process. Yeah I'm pretty sure there was. It would be so much easier if I could just read it, but my collection is in Ponyville. Maybe I still have a medical book in my old room. Taking a deep breath and then exhaling, Twilight made her way down the hall to the door of her childhood room, eager to have something to do apart from waiting on the mare in the shower.
She reached for the doorknob with her magical energy, mindlessly weaving it around the handle, before the dull drumming in her head thwarted the attempt. Twilight decided it would be less unpleasant to use her hooves like she had been all morning for mundane tasks. Opening the door by hoof, although easy enough, felt strange and inefficient. Cheerilee opens doors and operates shower knobs without magic all the time. Now I get why earth ponies use their mouths for so many things, Twilight ruminated. Her thoughts wandered back to the sleeping Cheerilee nibbling on her ear before assaulting the side of her face with her tongue, the sensation still vivid in her memory. Why am I thinking of that now? I have a book to find. The fluttering feeling in her stomach and the heat in her face returned as she stepped back into her childhood bedroom. Twilight glanced over her room before spotting a small bookshelf above the study desk that sat against the opposite wall.
Twilight crossed the room wondering how little Her had managed with such a small bookshelf, especially since many of the volumes contained therein were dedicated to the single subject of training pets. Spike had been a difficult hatchling. She scanned the row of books, but to her disappointment she found only one medical book: My Pony Body. Although the trusty tome had seen her through to her coming-of-age, it’s broad, puddle-deep perspective had been written with very young readers in mind. Fully-grown Twilight knew that she would find it remedial. Oh well, I will just have to make do with what I have, Twilight said to herself as she, without thinking about it, began to weave her magic around the object.
She only got it past the desk when her purple aura flickered out and dropped the worn book onto something on the ground with a soft thump. She groaned. If magic disruption is a side-effect of hangovers, then I am never drinking again. Twilight looked down at the fallen book and found that it had landed on an unfamiliar pair of saddlebags that were embroidered with a trio of smiling sunflowers and stained with a substance that looked to Twilight like what she had woken up covered in this morning. This must be Cheerilee’s, Twilight thought. The bright red and the sugary smell brought fuzzy memories of the night before back to her. After a second of recollection Twilight remembered her own overreaction to what had looked like a bloody mess at the time but had turned out to be a red sauce that Cheerilee had been carrying inside a takeout container. I don’t know what I would do if I had really hurt a nice pony like her, Twilight thought to herself as the strange feelings in her stomach acted up again.
I should probably get them cleaned up before we leave. If I don’t get distracted by this headache, maybe I can concentrate long enough to cast a Minute Mending spell. Twilight magically prepared the familiar cantrip, it being her personal go-to on the all-too-common occasions when books would be returned in almost illegible condition. Twilight shut her eyes, focusing through the pain, as she wove the spell. The saddle bags levitated up from the ground in a wavering aura. As the magic cleansed them of contaminants—the first step of the mending process, her headache spiked which caused her levitation magic to flicker and drop the weighty book into one of the open bags. The spell’s successive mending cycles were coming to an end when Twilight heard Cheerilee call her name from the door frame. Feeling that the spell was stable enough to play itself out, she dared to open her eyes.
“Oh, you’re- Oh. My, it’s beautiful,” Cheerilee mumbled in awe before locking eyes with Twilight. Where in the wide world of Equestria had ‘beautiful’ come from? Even an earth pony like me has seen that spell before. When I was a foal, Dad would always use it whenever I would spill soda on the carpet. Cheerilee thought to herself, still absently staring at the mare in front of her even as her saddlebag fell to the floor, the spell completed.
“You think so? It’s just a cantrip. Nopony has ever really complimented me on it before,” Twilight said, eyes trailing up and away from Cheerilee as she rubbed the back of her head with a hoof. “Um, thanks.”
Cheerilee shifted on her hooves. “I, uh, was looking for you downstairs, but couldn’t find you. Were those my saddlebags that you just cleaned?” Cheerilee asked as she gestured with her nose at the object of the spell that Twilight had cast.
“Sorry for cleaning them without asking. I came in here for something, and I saw them on the floor. Cleaning my old room is still a force of habit, apparently,” Twilight replied. The fluttering in her stomach was on the verge of becoming outright churning, and her face flushed with embarrassment, at what exactly she wasn’t sure. Stupid hangover.
Cheerilee stepped over to her fallen saddlebags. “It’s okay, I had forgotten all about them until just now. I probably would have left them here if you hadn’t seen them,” she reassured her awkward new friend. “We should probably get going soon. My friends are probably wondering where I am right now,” she finished as she bent down to retrieve her bags from the floor.
“Right. I’m sure mine are worried about me too, and I would like to know where Rarity is. I mean, I know that she can look after herself, but we really should get going,” Twilight replied, stepping around Cheerilee and into the doorway. “We also need to find your hotel.”
“I’m almost certain that it was made of marble with dark oak trim. It looked very different than the buildings around it,” Cheerilee replied as she strapped the saddlebags to her back. “But I am afraid that I have no clue what street it’s on,” she said even as her teeth were occupied with tightening the belt around her belly.
From the doorway, Twilight carefully noted the display of oral dexterity that was no doubt quite commonplace among non-magic users. Amazing. She cleared her throat and refocused. “Well, then we should begin by retracing our steps from last night,” Twilight said before turning down the hallway, Cheerilee following just behind her. As the pair made their way to the bottom of the stairs, Twilight continued, “the last place I remember being last night was the bar. We should start there.”
“The bar,” Cheerilee thought out loud. “Didn’t it have a neon light in the shape of a rose?”
“Yes!” Twilight exclaimed, the memory coming back to her at the mention of the sign that drunken Rarity had found so appealing. “We could also ask about my friend Rarity while we’re there.” She telekinetically grabbed the set of spare keys off of the mounted key rack near the front entrance, her returning clarity giving her focus that she had lacked earlier. “I’m not sure where it is exactly since last night was the first time that I had been there, so I’ll let you take the lead.” She pulled open the front door with her hooves, not wanting to test her magic on anything heavier than a set of keys just yet and stepped aside to allow her companion through the door. With her wobbly magical aura Twilight managed to lock the door behind them.
“To tell the truth, that was my first time there as well,” Cheerilee said slowly. “Bar hopping isn’t really my scene, and neither are mares-only bars. Also, I’m pretty sure that most bars are closed during the day.”
Twilight hummed, contingency plans running through her head like a runaway train. We could try to find it in a directory! ...If we knew the name of the bar. We could ask for directions! ...Yeah, asking random ponies in Canterlot for directions to the nearest gay bar is going to go over real well. We could visit the city archive and find a listing of businesses with liquor licenses in-
“Doughnuts!” Cheerilee shouted, startling Twilight out of her reverie and making her take a step back in surprise. “Don’t you remember something about getting doughnuts last night?”
“I think so,” Twilight replied, trying again to penetrate the pain-inducing hangover fog that was obscuring her memory. This time an image of an enormous doughnut-shaped sign showed through the haze. “You’re right! We passed by a doughnut shop on the way home. We could ask there about nearby bars.”
“Exactly,” Cheerilee replied. “Do you know of any doughnut shops that are close by? That’ll probably be our best chance.”
To her relief, Twilight found that her childhood memories were not guarded by headache or haze. “There was one place that my brother used to take me to when I was a filly. Follow me,” she said as she descended the front steps to the sidewalk below.