//------------------------------// // Entry 6: Drink in Moderation // Story: Journals of the Royal Alchemist // by Ashfur //------------------------------// Celestia's Journal, January 30, 35 ANM Today was perhaps one of the most embarrassing moments of my tenure as princess of Equestria. It was supposed to be a perfect day, planned down to the minute.  For the first time, I had finally managed to arrange a banquet with all the Lords and Ladies in attendance, every last one.  It was supposed to be a feast to celebrate unity, and to discuss how each province of Equestria was doing without needing to send letters across long distances. The banquet started off well enough.  Everypony took their seats, and the servants brought out some appetizers as we chatted.  And then, to kick things off, everypony got a glass of Violet Hills wine.  It's some of the most expensive wine in the world, given the quality and how difficult it is to import.  I personally only have fifteen bottles in storage, and I had set aside six in the wine cellar so there was just enough for each noble to have a single glass before we moved on to less expensive wines. "A toast," I remarked, "To our cooperation towards a brighter tomorrow."  And we all drank our wine in one one gulp.  It tasted different than expected, but we all finished our glasses and let out a sigh. "I say, that tasted quite-  WHAT HAPPENED TO MY VOICE!?"  I glanced over, the voice was one of the most feminine I'd ever heard.  Sultry, too.  To my surprise, it had come from none other than Lord Wild Wind, who usually sounded gruff and irritated. "Wild, Wind, are you alright?"  I asked, before immediately slamming my hooves over my muzzle in embarrassment.  My own voice was masculine, deep.  It was as though the perfect stallion from any mare's fantasies had switched his voice with mine!  The whole room erupted into pandemonium as everypony realized their voice was different.  Some were squeaky and high pitched, others aggressive and powerful, but always, ALWAYS was not a match for the pony speaking. Under normal circumstances, I'd look to Arcane as the root cause, but I locked his laboratory today so he wouldn't cause any disruptions.  My only guess is that some of that vile Discord's magic must have been on a delayed curse, or something similar.  I've launched an investigation, and had to do so without speaking out of embarrassment.  Thankfully my voice has returned to normal. January 30, 35 ANM So, I'm sitting in my lab in the castle, waiting for a few potions to finish brewing.  I may be the best at what I do, but I am still only one pony, so I can only have so many potions brewing at once before I risk not being on time for an important step. I should probably mention that my lab is located on the first floor of the castle, away from the throne room.  It's near one of the gardens, which serves as both a way to reach most of the fresh herbs I need and an evacuation route in case of a problem.  It's a one way door, too, mainly so I can't get in that way if Celestia locks me out of my lab like she did today.  Thankfully I dug a secret entrance from the wine cellar to my lab. So, my potions finish brewing, and I realize that I've forgotten to restock on glass bottles since there's been a bit of a shortage recently.  So I sit down and think, where am I going to store these potions?  It's not like I know a place with lots of glass bottles that is cool and dry and dark and then I realized I know exactly where I needed to go. So I got to the wine cellar, right?  And I take like ten bottles off the shelf, and they're all from this really obscure region of Prance called the Violet Hills.  They were the only bottles from that place, so it must be small and not important.  So I emptied all 30 bottles down the drain in my lab, washed them out, and filled them with potions.  It was a special brew, too, since Hearts and Hooves day is coming up.  I'm not making love potions this year after the fiasco last year, so instead I decided that I'm making a voice changing potion to give ponies the confidence to confess their love to their crushes.  I put the bottles back on the shelf in the wine cellar until I can get more glass bottles, but Violet Hills is such an obscure, out of the way place that it shouldn't matter.  All they do is make wine there. Anyway, Celestia wrote me a letter asking me to help with an investigation going on.  Apparently she thinks there's a bit of Discord's magic lingering around?  Something about a dinner party.  I'm just glad she didn't come ask me herself, otherwise I'd have to explain why I'm in my lab when she locked it, and I don't want her finding out about my secret way in.  Or that I can pick locks. Also, the voice changing potions disappeared, somehow, probably related to the chaos magic if there is any.  Probably for the best, if I didn't clean out the wine bottles completely there's a chance the potion would make the voice of the drinker into the voice perfectly suited to seduce themselves.  That'd be awkward.  It's not worth reporting, so I just brewed some more, in actual bottles this time.