October 21, 33 ANM
I had an interesting occurrence at the market today. See, I was walking along when…
Arcane Catalyst trotted past a few stalls in the Canterlot market. Ponies happily peddled their wares, and many were seen haggling with practiced ease. Arca loved the market, there was always so much going on! So many things to find, and if he got lucky, some rarer ingredients or books. Or snacks.
Of course, he had his own stall to run, and he figured he should get back before the force field he cast over it wore off. At least, that was the plan. But as Arca turned around, his ears perked up. Standing a short distance away from him was an interaction going on at a stall. It seemed like an argument.
More alarming was that it appeared to be an alchemy shop, and the customer was a royal guard.
The guard slammed his hoof down on the counter, rattling a few errant bottles. "Have you no respect for Her Majesty Celestia's Royal Guard?! I will say again, Potion Seller, I am going into battle and I need your STRONGEST potions!"
The merchant, irritated at the guard's continued insistence, pulled his potions out of reach. "I have plenty of respect for the guard, but I tell you again, these potions are too strong for you! My strongest potions would kill a dragon, let alone a weak stallion like you!"
Sluuuuurrrrrp…
Both stallions turned their heads to the sudden noise. While they had been distracted, Arca had simply walked up and, with his usual lack of regard for safety, had picked a potion at random and chugged it.
He smacked his lips and let out a satisfied exhale, as the other two looked on in shock. "...meh, I've had better tasting potions. You were right about this being enough to kill a mortal, though. I can taste the conquesta dust in this, I'm impressed you got your hooves on any. You can only find it in the depths of the eternal blizzard where the Crystal Empire used to be, and-"
"Y-you utter fool! Do you even realize what you've done?!" Potion Seller grabbed Arcane by the head with his forehooves and stared him in the eyes. "You drank that, that means that-"
"Yeah, yeah, I'll die in twenty minutes, I've heard it all before, blah blah blah." Arca rolled his eyes. "All it does is give you prime-of-life skill until it wears off and you 'die', which is incorrect. It ages you 100 years over 20 seconds, and I have a workaround for that. Seriously, you could have picked so many different things to give an equivalent strength boost. What good is the strongest potion if you can't use it?"
"Are you dense?!"
"My boss didn't name a metal Arcanium for nothing, so I assume so. At least, that's what she told me."
"You are going to die! Mortal fool!"
Arca shrugged and turned to face the other stallion, the one from the royal guard. "So, you're going into battle and need the good stuff, huh?"
"Y-yes. I came to see this potion seller because I need only the strongest potions to vanquish my foe!"
"Whatch'a fighting?"
"Far down the cliff, on the border of the Everfree forest, there's been sightings of a hydra that-"
"Count me in, then! I'll get my stuff." Arca flipped a 100-bit coin onto the counter to pay Potion Seller, who was looking more and more exasperated by the second. "Keep the change, friend!"
"B-but what about acquiring strong potions?!"
"I'll brew some back at my stall. I'll give you potions so strong that you'll make that hydra wish it had never been born! But a raid boss is no fun without friends. I'll grab Mister Splinters and my gear, and we can take it down together!"
As Arca and his new friend Potion User walked off, Arca's body briefly glowed as the conquesta dust attempted to age him. Potion Seller fainted as he saw that the mysterious pony was actually capable of handling his strongest potion.
"Shouldn't that have killed you?" Potion User asked.
"Nah," Arca shrugged as he ushered the knight into his tent. "Old age can't kill a rock."
"What?"
"Nothing!"
…turns out conquesta dust is now illegal, by the way. Has been for a while, nopony told me. Anyway, that was yesterday. I didn't die, obviously, because (loathe as I am to admit it) the growths on my sides do mark me as Innovation incarnate. Anyway, I'm about to go and fight this hydra with my new best customer, Sir Potion User! He uses potions in battle. I like his style, so I gave him the strongest potion I could brew on such short notice.
October 22, 33 ANM
Court had to be cancelled this morning. The staff are in a panic because a massive explosion just leveled a small chunk of the Everfree forest. Under normal circumstances I would be quite alarmed at such an event, but shortly after I got a letter from Arcane asking if, hypothetically, it would be possible to transport a hydra-sized object from a hypothetical forest up a hypothetical mountain to a hypothetical capital city before it rots, so a hypothetical alchemist could use it for ingredients.
I'm not sure if I should tell him he's not subtle.
I also just received another message from Arca that reads: 'Nevermind, I got it.'
That colt worries me. And now I need to find a place to store an entire dead hydra.
-Celestia