//------------------------------// // Entry 4: Beat the Heat // Story: Journals of the Royal Alchemist // by Ashfur //------------------------------// July 11, 33 ANM It's REALLY hot. Like, I don't know what the problem is, but my lab is sweltering.  First I thought I'd accidentally put on one of my insulated winter lab coats by mistake, but nope, it's just that hot.  I've checked the windows, they work fine.  I've tried spritzing water in the air.  It doesn't work.  The sun is beating down outside and if this keeps up I'm going to have to chug a water breathing potion and hide in the moat until nightfall. Normally, I'd go over to the throne room and just ask Celestia if she could please tone down her pet fireball in the sky.  But she's in a meeting with a foreign dignitary, and she's smart.  She put cinnamon broomsticks in front of the doors to her meeting room!  I HATE those things!  They have way too strong a smell. I swear, the moat is looking more and more tempting with every passing second.  But then I wouldn't get any work done.  Although, Celestia HAS been telling me to take a day off on occasion… I have an idea. Celestia sol Invictus was having a bad day.  She was hosting the first diplomatic meeting with the recently established yak nation, and it was not going well. "Yaks upset!  Sun horse no agree to trade deals! Too hot in room!  Treats provided too rich, not crunchy enough!  Room smell like cinnamon too much!  Colors of room too bright!" Celestia grumbled under her breath, desperate for the conversation to get back to actual topics instead of complaining about literally everything.  She had never seen anything quite like this society, one built almost entirely on complaining until the other side relents.  It was more like a pack of adolescents as opposed to anything else.  Her only hope was that they wouldn't reach a point where- "Yaks leaving!" -the ambassadors would do that.  The group of ten yaks stood up, knocking the table to one side as they moved toward the double doors of the fancy meeting room.  They flung the door open unceremoniously, the doors swinging inward to reveal a literal wall of water.  It held position just long enough for some fish to swim past, and if one had sharp eyes, they would have seen all the guards were begrudgingly standing in their usual spots with extra long snorkels in their mouths. "New complaint!  Humidity in hallway too hig-"  That was all the head ambassador got out before the water flooded forward and slammed into the occupants.  Celestia barely had time to throw up a weak shield spell before she suddenly had a ball of wet yak impact the bubble and swept all of them into the current. Celestia poked her head above water a few moments later, having been carried through a school of fish and into the hallway.  She gasped for air as she paddled in the waves, panic and adrenaline making her wonder just what was the cause of her castle, which was situated on a literal mountain, was flooded.  And then the reason came floating by. "Aloha, Princess-boss!  It was hot out and you were busy so I fixed the problem myself."  Sure enough, Arca was drifting by on an inner tube, wearing sunglasses and a teal lab coat with pineapples printed on it.  He also had a glass of pink lemonade with a tiny umbrella in it. "ARCANE CATALYST!" "What?  Did you want a drink too?" Celestia knew she was going to need a drink after this.  A very alcoholic one.  "Arca, WHY is the castle flooded, and where the buck did you get all this water?!" "Oh, I drained the moat with a portal.  I got the feeling you didn't want me interrupting your meeting." "Fix it!" Arca shrugged.  "Can't." "And why not?!" "Because it's my day off.  You told me to start taking days off from work, remember?"  Celestia was about to bust out the Royal Canterlot Voicetm when Arca gestured to his left.  "Plus, those guys seem to be enjoying it." Sure enough, off to the side, the group of yaks were having a blast in the water, splashing around and knocking over several dozen expensive things as they moved about.  "Yaks take back insults!  Sun horse has fun castle!"  "Yaks love pool to play in!  We take trade deal!"  "So long as yaks have place to splash, yaks are happy!" July 12, 33 ANM So turns out I actually need to NOTIFY Celestia that I'm taking the day off.  Before the day I'm not working, more specifically.  Also I'm not allowed to flood the castle again. On the plus side, I did a diplomacy!  The yaks were really happy with water to cool off in, and thanks to their thick coats they held the water and stayed cool for the whole visit.  They smell about as good as a cinnamon broom, though, in my opinion.  Wet yak is not a pleasant scent.  Celestia has, thankfully, decided to install a pool in the castle for recreation and future yak visits. I still had to clean up the mess and put the water back in the moat, unfortunately.  The whole first floor is still soggy and might have some mold if we aren't careful.  But I have a bigger problem… it's sweltering again!  And I can't do what I did yesterday, Celestia said I couldn't! …wait, I have an idea.  Should deal with the mold too. July 13, ANM I am no longer allowed to freeze the castle to make the throne room into an ice rink.