Chapter the Eleventh, or "In Which the Equestrians Get to Work"
I look out at the crowd of people in the lobby with the same air as a child looking for his Christmas presents. The past few weeks have been the most fun I’ve had in ages! The tests themselves were entertaining to say the least (Fluttershy had actually made the Soup Nazi cry, and Lyra insisted that Gilda rammed her car into a brick wall during her driving test), but the most fun I’ve had was definitely from my students: as I, Lyra, and Twilight shared the responsibilities of monitoring the tests (Twilight took the tests anyways, for some reason), I got to know even more about these great people and their stories. Sure, I still don’t know all of them… but I’ll cross that bridge when I get to it!
As I peek outside again, I feel a soft hand touch me on the shoulder. “Sebastian?” asks a female voice. I turn around to see none other than Twilight Sparkle, looking a bit nervous herself. “Could we talk about something?”
I raise an eyebrow. “What about, Twi?”
She opens her mouth to explain, but before she can, Lyra pops in with a slightly manic grin on her face. “Alright, crew, are you ready to do this?” she asks tersely.
Twilight sighs and gives me a soft smile. “I’ll ask you afterwards.”
I shrug. “Whatever. Let’s just get this show on the road!”
We all step outside to see the crowd of people awaiting us. As usual, Twilight starts us off: “Hey guys,” she smiles. “Thanks for helping make this training procedure easy for all of us. I’m proud to say that most of you have passed your exams with flying colors!”
A series of whoops come from the crowd. I look to find Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash both in game jerseys, flaunting soda hats, foam fingers, and air horns. Their respective boyfriends, however, don’t seem as excited.
“…Anyways,” I continue, “there’s good news and bad news. The good news is that there’s only one more exam to go through. The bad news is that this might be the most challenging one to pull off. For your final exam, you’ll all have to find jobs.”
A collective groan goes through the lobby. I chuckle a little at their reluctance. “Now, I realize that some of you have already gotten back into full swing of your old lives: the Cakes, I hear, just opened up a bakery near Centennial Olympic Park,” I say, nodding towards the family of four. “The problem is that some of your former professions have no human equivalent, or at least not one that correlates to a modern job. With that in mind, it is imperative that you find a steady source of income by the end of the week. Don’t worry about documentation, because as most of you already know, Derpy has graciously arranged for psychic papers to be made for each of you to pass through the legal paperwork. If you need help finding a job that’s right for you; please, feel free to talk to Twilight, Lyra, or myself. Thank you guys once again, and happy job hunting!”
After a little applause, everyone leaves the lobby, talking about tonight’s rather abrupt lecture. The usual gang comes up to us: Pinkie Pie, Donut Joe, Soarin, Rainbow Dash, Spitfire, Fluttershy, Big Mac, Applejack, Spike, and Rarity. I take this opportunity to ask the question that was on everyone’s mind: “What the hell are you two doing with all that sports gear?” I ask incredulously.
Pinkie Pie gives me a grin. “Dashie and I were just watching a game, but then we decided to bring our stuff here to cheer you on!”
“Oh, uh… thanks, I guess.”
“Who’s winnin’?” asks Mackintosh tentatively.
“The Saints are beating the Giants 21 to 15!” Rainbow Dash grins triumphantly.
Applejack gives her brother a leer. “Ya heard the lady, ya big lug. Pay up!”
With a growl, Mackintosh slaps five dollars into Applejack’s hand. “Here ya go, ya cheap little—”
“Mackintosh!” gasps Rarity in shock. “I thought you were a gentleman! May I remind you of our current company?!”
Spike grumbles a little. “I’m not that young…”
“Anyways,” I interrupt, “have you guys gotten jobs yet? I know a few job fairs popping up, if you’re interested.”
Mackintosh shakes his head. “AJ and Ah got jobs at the conservatory. They needed a few farmers working over there anyways.”
Rarity gives me a smile. “Thank you for the offer, darling, but I’ve already secured a job worthy of my talents. Job hunting won’t be necessary.”
Spitfire also gives me a grin. “Don’t worry, teach, we already snagged a job over at the airport.”
My eyes nearly pop out of their sockets. “You guys are PILOTS now?!”
Rainbow Dash gives me a smirk. “Well, DUH! Just 'cause we aren’t allowed to fly in plain sight doesn’t mean you can keep us grounded! Trust me; flying a plane’s a breeze!”
Soarin rolls his eyes. “You know, we're still JUST trainees. We aren’t even allowed outside of the state.”
“Whatever!” Dash exclaims. “It only takes like, what, a month? It’ll fly by!”
Pinkie Pie also looks excited. “The Cakes gave me and Joey jobs at their new bakery! It’s going to be SOOOO much fun! We’re gonna make cakes, and pies, and donuts, and—”
I look at Joe sympathetically. “Dude, I’m so sorry.”
He shrugs. “After a while, it gets kinda cute.”
“—and strudels, and breads, and candies, and—” Pinkie Pie continues, practically singing now.
Fluttershy shakes her head and smiles. “I, um, got a job at that nice veterinarian’s office nearby…”
I grin. “That’s great, Shy! I knew you could do it!”
She blushes. “Oh, I wasn’t so sure. I think he was only being nice…”
“Are ya’ll kiddin’?!” asks Big Mac. “No one deserves that job more than ya’ll, darlin’!”
Her face reddens even more. “Oh, I don’t think so…”
Rarity squeals in delight. “Oh, I’ve got the perfect little dress for you to go in on your first day of work! Something practical, and chic, and—”
Once again, Twilight taps me on the shoulder, nervous. “Um, Sebastian, we REALLY need to talk.”
I sigh and follow her as we leave the others to their own conversations. When we reach a safe distance away from the group, I eye Twilight suspiciously. “Why did we need to leave the group?” I ask.
Twilight blushes a little. “Well, what I really needed to ask you was—”
Suddenly, a chill goes down my spine. I sense a grave disturbance in the force… as if some poor fool was allowing Pinkie Pie access to caffeine. I turn to find that, sure enough, someone had been foolish enough to leave an iced coffee a mere two feet from the pink menace. She and I lock eyes, and at that moment, I know that shit is about to go down.
Suddenly, out of nowhere, Pinkie leaps up at least three feet in the air, surprising all around her. Reacting to this, I dive for the coffee. No good. She scoops the cup off the counter with a triumphant grin before pursing her lips, going for the straw, and—
“NOPE!” declares Joe, snatching away the frosty beverage. “You know what happens when you drink this stuff, Pinkie.”
Pinkie gives him a sheepish grin. “Uh, I was only going to drink a little bit, I swear!”
Joe was not amused, judging by his stony face. “Right…”
Pinkie Pie starts sweating bullets. “Please, Joey!” she begs hoarsely. “I NEED this!”
He just shakes his head. “I’m sorry, Pinkie. This is for your own good.”
She suddenly gets a mischievous grin on her face. “Oh, I know what’ll make you change your mind…” she leans over and whispers something in his ear, but other than a blush, Joe stands firm.
“Not that I doubt that you could go on for that long, Pinkie, but seeing as we just got jobs, I don’t think we can get away with three straight weeks locked up in our room.”
The pink-haired menace blanches. “Oh yeah…”
Shaking my head, I turn back to Twilight, who has the same look of exasperated amusement on her face. “I’ll never get used to that, will I?” I sigh.
She gives me a smile. “It’s Pinkie Pie. You never get used to her.”
“Fair point. Now, what was it that you wanted to ask me?”
“Oh… right.” She takes a deep breath before steeling herself up. “Well, what I wanted to ask you is—”
“Hey Sebastian!” calls Rainbow Dash. “Soarin, Spitfire, Gilda, and me are going to get some shots! You coming with?”
I shake my head. “Sorry, Dash. I don’t drink.”
“Who said you had to drink?” she grins. “I just wanted a designated driver!”
Soarin gives me an apologetic look. “It’s been a little too long since Dash had a drink, and she’s apparently curious to see what human alcohol tolerance is.”
I roll my eyes. “Well, good luck with that. Make sure Dash and Gilda don’t kill anybody.”
Spitfire gives me a flirty wink. “No promises,” she teases, and the trio goes off, presumably in search of their fourth member.
I sigh. “You know what, Twi? Let’s just go up to my place. At least we won’t get interrupted there.”
For a second, I could have sworn that I saw a tint of red rise up on Twilight’s cheeks, but she just nods quickly. “Yeah, sure. Your place sounds nice. Let’s go there.”
At My Place…
I open the door to my room and gesture for Twilight to come in. Other than the massive amounts of ferret tubing (yes, there is a difference between hamster and ferret tubing, don’t ask) running across the walls, it’s rather unremarkable. I sit down behind my computer desk and invite the nervous girl to sit down on my bed. “Alright, Twi: what’s up?”
She starts rubbing her arm nervously, eyes darting around the room. I catch her uncomfortable gaze and grin. “I’m not going to eat you, Twilight. Just tell me what you wanted to talk about.”
She laughs a little at my joke before getting serious. “Well… It’s just that, we’ve known each other for a while, right?”
“One month, two weeks, and three days, to be exact.”
She looks at me strangely before continuing. “I just thought… Well, since we know each other so well now, maybe we could start… you know… working together?”
I look at her quizzically. “What do you mean?”
She blushes and continues. “Well, I know how much you want a secretary for your office, and I thought that—”
“YES!!!” I cry, jumping up from my seat. “You get the job, Twi! Dear God, you have NO IDEA how much I need this!”
She perks up immediately. “Really?!”
“Of course!” I laugh, throwing my arms around the girl. “I mean, you’re talented, you’re intelligent, my boss is going to LOVE you! Show up tomorrow at six and I’ll drive you to the firm!”
“Oh, thanks Sebastian!” she cries happily, hugging me back. “I mean, I just can’t believe my lu—”
“Uh, are y’all in the middle of sumthin’? Cause ya’ll know, we can leave.”
We both turn to see the group staring at us from the doorway. Big Mac, AJ, and Joe have smug looks on their faces; Rarity looks like she’s fighting off the giggles; Pinkie Pie is bouncing up and down excitedly; Fluttershy’s face is cherry red, and it looks like she has no idea whether to be happy or terrified; and Spike, of course, just looks weirded out. “What’s going on here?” the green-haired boy asks accusingly.
Twilight and I separate instantly, both of us flushing instantly. “THIS ISN’T WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE!!!” I swear.
AJ chuckles softly. “Now, where have Ah heard that one before?”
“We were just celebrating!” stammers Twilight.
“Right. Celebrating.” Joe smirks.
“Twilight and Sebastian, sitting in a tree; K-I-S-S-I-N-G!” chants Pinkie Pie.
I sigh. I’m never going to live this down, am I?