//------------------------------// // The Sad Tale of an Orphan: Revised // Story: Aurora at Heart // by Jack Soulheart //------------------------------// It was just another sleepless night. I had cried myself to sleep, but it wasn’t enough. I was still super tired, and it didn’t help that my only source of warmth had gotten up before me. My bedmate was nowhere to be found as I felt around for her. A sense of fear flashed over me. Was I alone again? Did she get adopted?  The fear was almost unbearable. I didn’t want to lose another roommate, especially one who I thought wanted to be friends with me. But with my stubbornness, I may have missed the chance. I have become quite an introvert because most of my friends were being adopted, and I was not. My heart had been broken from that one too many times. And my pillow knows precisely how many tear-filled nights I have had—just hoping to get adopted. A door squeaked open, and I heard the voice of the staff telling us to get up. The lights flickered on, and I saw my roommate standing beside the bed. My fear slowly dissipates but not entirely. I didn’t want to let my guard down because she could be adopted any day. But ever since I’ve entered my teens, I have a slim chance of that happening. Spotted Leaf was like a little sister to me. I knew she cared. However, I kept pushing her away. She started her daily routine next to the bed. Her mane and tail were a mess, probably due to my accident in the middle of the night. I guess she must have rolled into my… Wet spot, during her sleep. I’ve had nightmares since my mom’s passing. That, mixed with a weak bladder, has caused some problems. Sure I had problems since I was a filly. Back then, though, I hardly ever wet the bed because my mom would care for me and help me sleep peacefully. But even then, I’d have many accidents, even if they weren’t as frequent.  Before my mom passed away, she put me through surgery to get my bladder stretched, but it failed and only made things worse. It had caused me to pee blood for several weeks, but another surgery solved that… So it did help me for a long while, although as I grew, the problem seemed to come back because my mom passed away, and I had nightmares about how she had died.  Heading to the bathroom, I began to prepare for the day and… well, sadly… do a thorough cleaning after relieving myself. Yes, I wet the bed last night, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have to go now. Each bed row had its own shower, toilet, and sink that we got assigned. So I followed Spotted to the filly’s bathroom on the 6th row, the last row in our section. With each row, they either had two to four fillies. My row only had me and Spotted. I sat on the toilet and stared at my reflection in the mirror. My eyes were baggy from lack of sleep, and my purple mane and pink fur were sticky and matted down from piss, causing me to groan as I stared down at the mess. Next, I looked at my oversized ears. One of them has a scar caused by an overly excited colt biting it. This morning, the only thing different was the bandage I wore from smashing my head against a window trying to escape this cursed place. And my horn, my poor horn, was hung around my neck like a necklace. I have been here for ten years. And no pony wants a teenage filly with the problems I have. I could still feel the persistent sting across my body as I sat there. Maybe… Maybe trying to pull off that escape wasn’t the best idea… after all, where would I have gone? I have nowhere to go… It took me forever to fully empty my bladder, another side effect of my surgery. But at least I’m not pissing blood. That’s a bonus. I got up, brushed my teeth, and stepped into the shower. You know, one of the simplest things to do to prepare for the day. I let the warm water run over my body. While inside, I grab some shampoo and a washcloth, beginning to scrub over my features. The surface of the washcloth was soft and warm from the water’s contact. The (now steamy) air was warming up around me, putting me in a relaxed trance. Spotted and I are very close. If anything should be made obvious, bed-mated ponies in this orphanage can become quite close. That’s why when one of our mates gets adopted, which two of ours have, it can cause serious heartache. We practically do everything together, take showers, and clean each other if needed… which was something I knew I would need today. Thanks to my now busted horn, I was required to use my hooves to pick things up. It was either that or my mouth, and I knew I did not want to pick up that washcloth in my mouth. I was firmly convinced that it had to be older than I am. “Aurora, can I come in now?” Spotted Leaf asked, looking through the open shower door. “Yeah, and would you mind helping me? It’s so hard to clean myself with my hooves,” I said as the other filly walked in beside me. She smiled and said, “Sure, but you’ll be owing me something later.” I moaned before responding, “Fine, but please don’t make a fool of me.” After the shower and getting embarrassed by Spotted, I was brushing my teeth when the orphanage director, Dusty, called us out of the bathroom to go eat. She was the director of the place, and she is kinda a bitch. Dusty is the one I learned most of my swear words from. She treated us orphans like we were trash. Only doing what Celestia required and nothing more. She gave us no love, and that alone did its course on me. I thought back to my pillow, who knew exactly what I meant by that with how many sleepless nights I cried. The worst part was that we weren’t allowed to leave besides to go to the playground, where I’d often sit by my lonesome in the corner of the fenced property. We also sometimes went on field trips, but they were super boring, and I often stayed behind. So the playground was the only place I could go to get quiet. Since only the older ponies were allowed to stay out after recess. It gave me time to think and wish for a better tomorrow. After my little incident with the towel, I went to the cafeteria to eat. I have been starving since I skipped supper the night before. I guess I was glad they fed us well here, unlike the orphans of Canterlot, who barely got food. I walked up to the cafeteria line to grab a bowl of Cinnamon Oatmeal. It was my favorite. I stood in line for about five minutes, and by the time I got there, my mouth was almost drooling. I really wanted that food. “Good morning, Aurora. What can I get you today,” asked Grace the deer. Grace was the nicest pony I know… Well, she is the nicest creature here that wasn’t an orphan. She was also a fantastic chef. I also find it funny that Grace remembers all the names of the ponies she serves.  I looked up to face her and said, “I’ll take my usual.” To which, Grace smiled and gave me the delicious Cinnamon Oatmeal. I walked over to the tables, But I felt like eating outside for today for some reason. It was kinda a nice day for it being winter. And it appeared Spotted Leaf was out there too, so at least I wouldn’t be lonely.  The door opened, and I walked down stone stairs. The wind blew my mane as I descended into the playground area. But I didn’t want to sit with the younger ponies, so I walked over to the spot I’d normally sit to eat alone. But for some reason, Spotted Leaf walked towards me. I know I said it was nice having her here with me, but just for today, could she let me eat in peace… “Hi Aurora, why are you sitting alone?” “Spotted, you know I am an introvert and don’t like spending time with other orphans because they are more liable to get adopted than me.” She looked at me with an empathetic frown and said, “I know that, but you need to have some pony in your life to keep you happy.” I laughed and said, “Happiness doesn’t exist in this place. Not even the youngest ponies are happy here. Plus, you’re younger than me. So you’d probably be adopted before me. Or before I get exiled from this place from being too old. Sometimes I don’t think I should even go to the adoption room to see if I get picked.” “Aurora, don’t lose hope. If you do that, this world has beaten you. Then you’re even less likely to be seen as a good choice because you’re all mopy.” She told me as she moved closer. Then she lifted my chin with a hoof and continued. “You at least have memories of your family. Some of the others don’t even have that. I know that can also make things harder, but at least you know what you’re missing out on”  I looked at her, and she was smiling at me. So then I responded by saying, “Well, I don’t know, I just wish I could get out of here and that someone would love me. It’s not that I don’t want some friends… Because I do. I just chose not to because I am tired of the heartache when they get adopted, and I don’t. I’ve been here for ten years, and the only three ponies aside from you that cared for me were Compass, Fire Heart, Steal Dawn... and Grace the deer.”  “And what happened to them?” asked Spotted Leaf. “Compass was adopted when I was six, Fire Heart was when I was nine, and Steal Dawn died of Feather Flu this year. I am tired of being here. It’s caused me so much pain. I have dreams about my mother every night. But her face changes over time as I forget what she looks like….” I sat down with my food and looked at the Oatmeal that was cooling in my hooves. Then, I tried to use my magic to lift my spoon, and my horn stump just sparked. I felt like I sat there trying for about five minutes before Spotted took the spoon out of the bowl and booped my nose with it. Then, as I went to open my mouth to say something, she placed it in my open maw. Spotted Leaf smiled at me and said, “Care if I feed you?” I blushed at her kindness. This wasn’t the first time she had helped me since my failed escape. I might have lost my magic completely if it weren’t for her. But instead, she somehow healed me with her own magic. It was an odd thing for her to know at this place. I only learned telekinesis because of an accident in class. But I nodded my head. We were the only ones out here besides two colts who wouldn’t bother us because they were not in our lot since we were fillies that had hit puberty. So if a colt would come near us, they’d get a stern talking too. Well, I am actually not sure If Spotted has…She is young, but she just seems so mature. She dipped the spoon into the bowl and pulled another spoonful to my mouth. I took it graciously, chewing then swallowing time after time.  But that’s when she said, “I am not going anywhere without you. If some pony wants to adopt me, then they’ll just have to take you too. You need a friend, a sister who can take care of you.” Then, to my shock, she kissed my cheek and gave me the last spoonful of my food. I sat there thinking about what she said. If she really was serious about what she said, then I may have a chance to be adopted after all. She was a pretty filly with a dark green main with a stripe threw it of a darker hue. And her fur was a lime color which matched her cutie mark perfectly. She had a love for nature, and I envied her. She had a chance to get adopted due to her charm and beauty. Another reason I envied her was her Cutie mark was something she loved. And I was still a blank flank. I was one of the oldest ponies here and still had no mark. It’s rare for a pony to hit puberty without a cutie mark, but I guess It’s not impossible because here I am one… “Are you sure you want to do that? I mean, this could ruin your chances of getting adopted.” I said with a saddened but hopeful tone.  “I’m sure. I don’t want you to feel alone any longer.” She said lovingly.  I blushed once again. But then it deepened as Leaf hugged me. It felt odd, as I hadn’t had a hug from some pony in a long time, let alone from someone who cared for me. But, it was a nice feeling nonetheless. Spotted Leaf broke the hug and gave me a smile. I thanked her for the kind gesture and walked away from the area.  Leaf followed me, and I looked back to see her smiling. “Hey, can I come with you? I said before, you need a friend, and I meant it.” “Sure, I guess,” I replied, not knowing what else to say in response. The more time I spent with her, the better, I suppose.  “Where are you going anyway,” She asked me as she put her foreleg around me in another hug. I guessed she was clingy for some reason, but it felt nice nonetheless.  “Just…going to our room again.” There really weren’t many other places to go.  “Why? It’s a nice day out. Why don’t we stay out here? There may not be many more days like this winter.” “I’m tired, Spotted,” I replied to her, “Every day, it’s the same routine, and…I don’t want to get too attached to our time together in case….Well, you know what’s going to happen.” “Aurora, I told you I won’t let that happen. I know we will eventually find a home that’ll take us both.” “You don’t know that!” I immediately apologized for my outburst, but I was beginning to hate the constant promises. She didn’t know if a potential family would take both of us. I hadn’t had much luck in the past, so what made her think now would be different? Sure she was a more attractive filly than me, so she’d probably have a better chance, but a family that’ll take us both…Is she crazy?! I’ve tried to get adopted when Compass did, but that didn’t happen. So what made her think we would now? “I know you feel this is not ever going to happen, but I got a feeling in my gut that I can help you. You just got to believe me, ok?” I felt her sincerity. She really believed with all her heart that now would be both of our chances. I guess I just had to give it one more shot just for her. How humiliating would it be if I was passed over again?  This had to be it.  “Aurora, you’ve been very good to me, even though you don’t go kindly to other ponies around the orphanage. I know you feel like no pony cares. But you’ve made me want to change that for you and become something you need, which is a friend.” I felt myself crack a little smile at her. She always knew how to bring out the best in me and vice versa. So what did I have to lose this time, right? “You never gave up on me either, Spotted…Alright, one last shot. I’ll trust you on this.” “Thanks. I really am thankful for everything you’ve done for me. It’s time I pay you back,” she said, walking past me and waving for me to follow. Deep down, I promised myself that if she was actually right about this, I would be thanking her profusely every day for the rest of my life. After my little nap and a nice snuggle with my new friend, the adoption bell rang. Letting us know that a potential family was coming to look for new members. Upon hearing that, I had a sinking feeling in my gut. I knew this bell and the disappointing outcomes that followed every time it rang. Yet, I had promised to be strong for Spotted, so I had to be the bigger mare and show confidence, or at least pretend to. “Well, I guess I need to wake her too, so she knows,” I said to myself, heading over to our room and ignoring the curious glares of everyone else. I mustn’t get distracted, I thought firmly. It was now or never.  I opened the door to our room and was surprised to see Spotted stretching on the bed. “Hey Aurora, I was awoken by the bell. Are you ready to see if this is the one?” “Absolutely not, but as long as you’re with me, I’ll make it through this one,” I replied with a forced smile. Was this what confidence looked like? Probably not. I was a fool. “Don’t look so downtrodden. You need to be cheery, or they’ll never pick us,” Spotted said as she tapped my tail for me to get moving. “Right. Cheery. Um…huzzah!! Today’s the day! Better?” What in Celestia’s name was I doing to myself? “Wow, you suck at acting… But I guess acting is better than being mopey.” We were halfway down the hall when two Mares walked out of the Adoption room. Were we too late? One of the mares, a light green unicorn, gave me a quick smile, and I felt my heart beating faster. What did this mean? I glanced over at Spotted, who seemed to have the same reaction, albeit with a mix of awe in her look. “Hello, young mares, why weren’t you two in the other room with your friends?” asked the tan earth pony mare.  Friends…? I have no friends, but Spotted, I thought to myself.  “Um…” I was blowing it. I was so blowing it. My mind was so blank I couldn’t even develop a single sentence. My earlier confidence act was falling apart. But Spotted spoke up for me, “Well, my sister and I were taking a nap before we heard the bell. We didn’t know that we were running late, ma’am.” “Oh, how sweet, you are a kind filly, To speak up for your older sister like that,” the unicorn said kindly.  Yeah, because I’m a total loser. I was grateful for Spotted. But, I didn’t know how to repay her for saving me like she did. “Thank you, ma’am,” replied Spotted respectfully.  “Well, how about we tell you that none of the foals in that room appealed to us,” My heart fluttered. Were they saying what I thought they were? My mind was at war with itself. One part of me was thinking, ‘Oh, Spotted was right. This is the day!’ While the other part of me argued, ‘Don’t be ridiculous. You still blew it. They won’t be adopting any pony.’ “But we must be on our way. Our ride is waiting for us,” said the earth pony mare. My heart sank again. If they were leaving, then I guess I was right about today. I wasn’t getting adopted, I thought. I had played up the confidence act for that shit. “Come on, let’s go outside to see what they are going to say,” Spotted said as she began to run to the Playground door,” “Wow, my friend is apparently an eavesdropper,” I mumbled. But, I liked the idea of knowing sooner rather than later.” As soon as we had walked outside, we could hear Dusty talking to the two mares.  “You’d be wise not to adopt those two brats,” Dusty spoke with such a demeaning tone that I could swear that she always wanted to say these words, “They’re a hoofful. One of them has a broken horn and medical issues!! I assure you, they’re too much for just two ponies to handle.”  “Well, no ponies are perfect. I can tell you’re not either. These fillies need a home more than all the others here. They’ll never have a chance with anypony else,” said the earth pony. “Also, I would like to point out that you just called them ‘brats,”’ the unicorn added matter-of-factly, “Looks like they’re not safe with you either.” “See, I told you,” Spotted whispered in my ear. “Shh, I’m trying to hear what they are saying,” I whispered back.  “We will be back tomorrow, and if a hair on either one of those two cuties is hurt, I am pressing charges on this damned Orphanage!” the earth pony shouted. “Cool it, Bonbon. I think she gets the point. Besides, we agreed it would be me pressing the charges.” the unicorn told her. Dusty looked mortified. For all the crap we had to endure under her wrath, seeing her face look like that felt like the most perfect blissful revenge.  “We should get back to our room before any pony sees us,” said Spotted, as she tapped me on the tail again. I nodded, and we snuck out of the vicinity before anyone saw us. My mind was still reeling from what I had just heard. These ponies actually defended us? It was a foreign concept to me, yet I had just seen for once a family that actually…liked us. Spotted and I were curled up in bed that night when one of the staff came in to check on us. I was glad it wasn’t Dusty. But what they said was even better. “Well, you two have been officially adopted, so please pack your things and be ready for tomorrow.” My heart felt like it was going to leap out of its chest! Was this a dream? It didn’t feel like one. No, it was true. I was finally going to be adopted after all these years!  I looked over at Spotted again, and she was beaming at me. She had been right all along. I was so lucky to have her. All at once, I felt all of the pain I had stored away in me for years finally wash away in a great flood, clearing away for the beautiful sunshine of pure joy at last. Sure I had a few worries, but for the most part, I was as happy as can be.  As soon as the staff had left, Spotted jumped at me and hugged me. This was the day I had been waiting for my whole life. I wanted to never let go of her, take her aside, and thank her all day for putting up with my constant pessimism and giving me hope when I had none.  “We did it!” She yelled over and over again. “We certainly did!” I exclaimed back, finally letting out a true expression of joy. Now, I finally understood. This was what being cheery felt like. And it was glorious.  I closed my eyes and let my mind go to the place where I had been dreaming of. A place my mom had wanted for me after she said the final words. “My little one, home is not where you are but where you are loved. And I will always love you….” I looked up to the ceiling, feeling a warm presence nearby, almost as if my mom was there with me, holding me in her hooves. I knew exactly what I wanted to say, “Thank you, Celestia. Thank you, mom. I will take this chance and make the new life I’ve wanted since your passing. And I’ll make you proud of me.”  Spotted had already fallen back to sleep, holding me close to her like I was her only pony left in the world. I then cuddled her back and rested my head on my pillow.