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// Chapter 3: The Speed Test 
// Story: May The Best Pet Win...My Heart? 
// by Tailslover13 
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“Okay, now that our resident egghead is all ‘stretched out’, we can begin the games,” Rainbow Dash teased, watching Twilight limp to the starting line of the first event with the tortoise moving ever so slowly right behind her, “This first game is a test of speed. As I’m sure you all can tell, this is a racetrack which is 50 yards long when completed in the oval shape that you all see before you.”

“No, really?” Twilight said sarcastically, taking a good look around the track and doing the quick calculations in her head, “Thanks for informing us of that, Dash; we couldn’t figure it out on her own just how big this track was and the shape that it’s in.”

“Oh, shut up,” Dash grumbled, crossing her arms and fluttering her wings, “My would-be pets do not speak back to me! Bad girl, Twilight. Don’t make me come over there and bop you on the nose.”

“Ooh, I’m SO scared,” Twilight smirked, her voice reeking of sarcasm yet again, “Rainbow, PLEASE don’t hurt me; I promise I’ll be a good girl and not speak out of turn again. Pretty please will you forgive me?” The unicorn gave Dash a taste of her own medicine by batting her eyelashes and trying to give the Pegasus a mock apologetic look. Dash could only scowl while making a mark on a clipboard that she was holding onto.

“THAT is gonna cost you some points, Miss Smarty Pants,” Dash said smugly, sticking her tongue out at the purple unicorn and tucking the quill that she just used behind her ear, “Now, before I was so RUDELY interrupted, I was saying that this track is 50 yards long. Therefore, when you run four laps, that means that you will have completed…uh…” She did some quick calculations in her head. “…oh, right, 200 yards! Yeah, that’s right, 200 yards!”

“Didn’t teach math in Flight School, Dash?” Twilight teased again. 

“And that’s gonna cost you even MORE points!” Dash growled, making some more random notes on her clipboard, “Keep it up, Twilight; I can do this all day.”

“She’s so fun to tease, don’t you think?” Twilight whispered to the nearby tortoise, who seemed to be her own friend, “She can dish it out, but she just can’t take it.” The tortoise couldn’t talk, but he did give Twilight a happy little smile and a bob of the head to let her know that he felt the same way. Thankfully, Rainbow was too busy barking out other orders to really pay attention.

“Okay, competitors, here’s how this is gonna work,” Dash said, “I want to see just how fast you really are! So, flying a mile will be a cinch, right? Yeah, it totally will be. For me, that would only about 10-15 seconds maximum! Each of you must fly…or run, for two of you…an entire mile on this track. Only the fastest will make it back before the others! Um…so, uh…how many laps would that be exactly?” She tried desperately to do the math in her head again, but Twilight couldn’t help but “assist” her a little bit.

“There are 1,760 yards in a mile, Dash,” Twilight said sweetly, trying to sound helpful, “Now, if you said that this track is 50 yards, how many laps will that be before you reach one mile?”

“S-s-shut up, Twilight! I-I-I was just coming up with the answer, but you distracted me and made me lose my train of thought!” Dash squeaked, pulling out her quill again and making more furious markings on her clipboard, “More point deductions for you, Miss Egghead!”

Twilight sighed and shook her head in bemusement while Dash quickly tried to come up with the answer again. Minutes passed, and despite what Twilight told Dash, she still couldn’t come up with an answer. The tortoise was getting bored and eventually pulled his head into his shell to take a snooze. The birds and other flying animals were preening their feathers, flexing their wings, sharpening their beaks on the ground, and randomly poking at each other while the blue Pegasus tried to come up with how many laps it would take to fill her quota.

“It’s 1,760 divided by 50, Rainbow,” Twilight sighed, “You’ll get a decimal, so I suggest you round to the nearest whole number.”

“More points deducted!” Rainbow said proudly, making more scribbles on her clipboard and smirking over at Twilight, “Man, Twilight, for somepony so bright, you sure aren’t very smart. You do realize that you don’t want points taken away, right? You actually WANT points.”

“Judging pets by points…nice, Rainbow,” Twilight sniffed, shaking her head in dismay, “What another perfect way to pick a pet…well done, Dash. You’re awesome, you really are.”

“Duh, I KNOW!” Dash said proudly, quickly turning whatever piece of paper she had on her clipboard over and scribbling out what Twilight just said to her, failing to get Twilight’s hidden sarcasm, “Okay, so…1,760 divided by 50…um, 50 doesn’t go into 1…or into 17…okay, how does this work again? Man, I always copied off Fluttershy’s paper on this stuff! Um…oh, right, 50 goes into 176 three times…and then 50 goes into 1,760…um…somewhere close to 40 times…so, that means, you will have to go 340 laps!”

“OH FOR THE LOVE OF CELESTIA!” Twilight groaned, slamming her head over and over onto the ground, “Dash, the answer is 35.2!”

“Huh? Where did you get THAT number? That doesn’t make any…oh,” Dash blinked, looking at her calculations a bit harder as a blush came to her face, “Oh…heh…right, I totally forgot that…um…anyway, yes, the egghead is right. You each will have to go 35.2 laps for…”

“Dash…you can’t go .2 of a lap!” Twilight moaned, still banging her head into the ground, “Didn’t you hear what I said about rounding it to the nearest whole number?”

“Hey, I said an ENTIRE mile, Twilight!” Dash snapped, “And .2 is still part of the number, so I am no way counting that out! What, are you scared of going that extra .2 mile? Ha, you’re just lazy!”

“Rainbow…that’s not the point…the point is…oh, forget it,” Twilight sighed, shaking her head and groaning in exasperation, “Do whatever you want; it’s your game.”

“You’re darn right it is,” Dash smiled, running a hoof through her mane, “Now, a few more point deductions for you due to annoying me, and then we can start!” Ignoring the added sighs from Twilight, Dash made more marks on her paper, tucked the quill back behind her ear, then was finally ready to get started. “Okay, so, you all have to fly or run 35.2 laps around this track. You get points depending on when you get back. The faster the better, remember. I want a pet that can keep up with me, so keep that as motivation when you feel like going just a hair slower. Every millisecond counts!”

“Wake up, buddy,” Twilight whispered, nudging the tortoise’s shell and watching as he slowly poked his head back out, “We’re about to get started…although I fear that this isn’t gonna be pretty.”

“I want a good, clean race here, competitors!” Dash barked, slowly flying back and forth in front of all the contestants, “So, if you plan on using dirty tricks and cheating…that would be JUST fine. Remember, so long as you win, that’s all that matters.”

“Did you learn NOTHING from the Running Of The Leaves?” Twilight asked. In response, Dash made another mark on her clipboard, then went back to addressing everyone.

“Okay, are you all ready?” the Pegasus shouted, flying to the sidelines and lifting up her whistle with a one hoof and a stopwatch with the other, “Make me proud! On your marks…” Twilight sighed again, and despite her body still being sore from the horrible workouts, she got into the same position that she used back when she competed in the Running Of The Leaves. “…get set…” The tortoise joined in with Twilight, at least with the part of looking ready to go. Really, just standing there, it was hard to tell just how ready he really was. “…GO!”

Rainbow Dash blew on her whistle, and all the flying animals instantly took off. The hawk, eagle and falcon all got the best start, blasting off with such power as they showed off their wing strength. The hummingbird, flamingo, bat, owl, and butterfly were all flapping along as hard as they could, but it was clear they didn’t have the speed as the first three birds of prey. Twilight had gotten caught in the backdraft of the flying creatures, which resulted in her doing a face-plant straight down into the dirt and even letting the slow-moving tortoise get an inch or two ahead of her. 

“Ugh…talk about a whirlwind experience,” Twilight moaned, twitching in pain as she hobbled back onto her hooves, “Well, no matter…I learned a lot from the Running Of The Leaves…there’s no way that I’m gonna…GAH!” Having taken way too much time getting back onto her hooves, the hawk, eagle and falcon had all finished their first lap and had once more sped straight past Twilight. Yet again, the combined speed from all three creatures blasted the purple unicorn right off her hooves and made her face-plant into the ground yet again. The tortoise was now even farther ahead of her.

“HEY, TWI, THIS ISN’T A FACE-PLANTING COMPETITION!” Rainbow Dash called from the sidelines, a massive grin on her face, “AND THE DIRT DOESN’T TASTE VERY GOOD, SO I WOULD SUGGEST NOT KEEPING YOUR FACE IN IT FOR TOO LONG.”

“Dash…you are the most obnoxious little…” Twilight began, but she shrieked almost immediately after picking herself up for the second time. The falcon, hawk and eagle had just completed their second lap, and since Twilight was right in the way, the falcon accidentally zoomed straight into her butt and stabbed her with its sharp beak. This caused the unicorn to scream in pain and fly straight up into the air, reaching underneath her and clutching her sore posterior and the new red mark as she did so.

“BWAHAHAHAHAHA!” Rainbow cackled, falling over in the grass as she kicked her hind legs like crazy upon watching Twilight smashed down into the dirt track, “T-T-TWILIGHT…OH, MY RIBS…OH MAN, IT’S TOO MUCH…BWAHAHAHAHA…TWILIGHT…GEEZ, OH MAN…THIS IS RICH!”

Twilight twitched in pain as she lay upside down in the deep hole that her face had created when she smashed back down onto the ground moments before. The only parts of her sticking up above the ground was her hind legs, her tail, and her rear-end with its compliment red mark throbbing on it. The unicorn squirmed weakly inside the hole, trying to get free, but let out a shriek when she felt the flamingo idly fly over the top of her butt as though it was nothing. Then, as more of the flying animals completed more laps, they zoomed straight through Twilight’s tail a few times and ended up ripping off strands of hair each and every time they flew through it.

What…am…I…doing? Twilight thought, whimpering as she felt her tail get destroyed and her butt still throbbing from the wound, This…is…humiliating! These games aren’t for me…why am I doing this? I could always use my magic…to cheat and win…but, that wouldn’t be fair. Dash WANTS us to cheat and use dirty tricks…but I’m not having that. I wanna win with dignity and class…and show her the true heart of a pet…wait, what? Why am I speaking like I WANT to be her pet? I DON’T! Ugh…I think this fall I took really did a number on my head.

“HEY, TWI, CAN YOU HEAR ME DOWN THERE?” Dash yelled, having flapped over to Twilight and was peering down at her butt, “I JUST WANT YOU TO KNOW THAT TAKING A SNOOZE INSIDE A HOLE IS NOT PART OF THIS RACE. SO, YOU’RE WASTING A LOT OF TIME DOING THAT. IF YOU’RE EXPECTING SOMEPONY TO KISS THAT BRUISE ON YOUR BUTT, I WOULDN’T HOLD MY BREATH. SO, MY SUGGESTION IS YOU PULL YOURSELF OUT OF THAT HOLE AND TRY TO SAVE FACE…BY QUITTING!”

Darn you, Dash…you rotten little filly…I’m gonna show you a thing or two! Twilight growled to herself, struggling to pull herself out of her hole. She kicked her legs like crazy and squirmed as hard as she could, her purple rump shaking back and forth as she did so, which only amused Dash even more as she watched from the sky. 

I probably SHOULD help her…but, no, this is a competition! Dash thought, crossing her arms across her chest while idly kicking her hind legs and flapping her wings, A pet has to learn how to fend for itself and I can’t always be there to hold its hoof or whatever. Man…Twi has a nice rear…I never realized just how nice the color purple is. Boy, that looks like bad wound, too…that falcon sure has a sharp beak. Too bad I don’t have any ointment for that…

Rainbow Dash slowly followed Twilight’s shaking rump and hind legs with her eyes, watching them thrash back and forth as the angry unicorn attempted to right herself. Her mangled tail flapped in the breeze and covered her sore rump now and then, and Dash caught herself staring even more. The Pegasus’ eyes seemed to lock onto the red mark that Twilight now had on her rump. Before she knew it, she felt something warm lighting up on her face, and when she reached up with a hoof, she found her cheeks as the culprit. She was blushing, and blushing badly at that.

“Ugh…Twi, this is NOT okay!” Dash stuttered, flying down and grabbing the unicorn’s hind legs, “You are not only making a mockery of my race, but you’re using your magic or whatever to make me feel weird. I said you could cheat, but not using your magic to mess with my head! That’s…gonna cost you…some more points!” She grunted as she flapped her wings hard and tugged upwards, pulling as hard as she could to free Twilight. With a loud popping sound, Twilight was eventually pulled out a second later.

“BLAH! PTOOEY! BLECH!” Twilight hacked, spitting out dirt and wiping out her mouth with her hoof, “Gross! Rainbow, you…uh…wait, you helped me?”

“Well, yeah…like I said, you were making a mockery of my race…and for some reason, staring at your butt was making me feel weird,” Dash frowned, dropping Twilight on her head a moment later and pulling out her clipboard, “So, I’m taking off points for being dumb enough to crash down into that hole…for not being able to pull yourself out without magic…and for enchanting me or whatever it was you did to make me feel queasy at staring down at your booty.”

“Y-y-you were…looking at my…wait, enchanting…WHAT?!?!” Twilight blinked, completely confused as she sat up and rubbed her aching head, “Dash, what in the world are you talking about? Why were you staring at my…OH CELESTIA!” 

Twilight had completely forgotten about the race by this point, so she was very surprised when the eight flying animals came around for yet another lap. The unicorn tried to duck away, but it was too late. With a loud screech, the falcon smashed right into Twilight’s face, and because he was leading the pack, the eagle and hawk both crashed into HIM a moment later. Before long, a huge pileup was on the track, with Twilight on the bottom of the pile and all eight flying animals squirming and squawking furiously on top of her. The tortoise was only halfway through his FIRST lap.

“Whoa! Twilight, NOT cool!” Dash growled, angrily making more markings on her paper, “You just fouled up all the other racers! Do you KNOW what this is gonna do to their times? You should be ashamed of yourself! Just because you’re lousy doesn’t mean you have to mess THEM up, too! Severe point deduction for you, Twi.”

“I am this close to strangling a certain Pegasus,” Twilight moaned, trying to pull herself out from under the pile of birds and other animals, “Dash, I didn’t foul them up; they flew right into me! THEY’RE the ones too stupid to realize that I was in their way! All they cared about was going as fast as they could and not even worrying about who they were up against!”

“Duh, I TOLD them to go as fast as they could, remember?” Dash pointed out.

“But just look at what they’ve DONE,” Twilight argued, “They ran me over, twice. I have a mark on my posterior now thanks to one of them flying straight into it. And now, instead of just flying around me, they all crashed right INTO me. Don’t you see? They care more about a race than they do about safety!”

Rainbow raised an eyebrow and placed a hoof to her chin, contemplating what Twilight said. There was some true in the unicorn’s words. The birds and other flying animals were indeed being reckless, and Dash herself knew what trouble could lead from that. Plus, even though it was funny to watch Twilight make a foal of herself, Rainbow didn’t really LIKE seeing the unicorn in pain. In fact, deep down, it upset her. But, these were NOT going to be easy games, and Twilight knew that. It was her own fault for wanting to be in it; Dash had even asked her twice, and Twilight had accepted both times. Therefore, whatever unfortunate events befell the unicorn wasn’t her fault, right?

“Humph…you’re just blaming the others for your own mishaps, Twilight,” Dash said calmly, scribbling away on her paper, “Sadly, that’s more loss of points for you; blaming others for your own faults is not a sign of a good pet, Twilight.”

Twilight Sparkle grumbled and shot Rainbow Dash a dirty look, then continued to try and complete her first lap. Sadly, the birds and flying animals had finally gotten back up from their crash, and once again taking little notice of Twilight, they slammed her out of the way once more and continued on with their laps, determined to be the first one to cross the finish line after the 35.2 required laps. The tortoise still had a good quarter of his first lap to go. 

And the race wore on and on. Twilight’s butt and head were both hurting badly, but she was determined to not use magic to cheat and she was determined to not quit. Sure, she was constantly bumped into by most of the competitors on each subsequent lap, and she wasn’t much of a runner, since the Running Of The Leaves taught her to pace herself and not rush, so it was taking her a very long time to complete the first game. The unicorn had barely finished five laps when Dash made an announcement. 

“FIRST PLACE IS THE FALCON!” Dash yelled out, stopping her stopwatch, “TAKING AWAY THE TIME THAT TWILIGHT CAUSED HIM TO MISS, HIS FINAL TIME IS…TWO MINUTES AND 12 SECONDS!”

Twilight sighed and hung her head, but continued to weakly hobble along anyway. Dash would frequently make more announcements during her laps, exclaiming the second, third, fourth, fifth, sixth, seventh, and eight place contestants. The eagle would finish second, the hawk finished third, the bat finished fourth, the owl finished fifth, the hummingbird finished sixth, the flamingo finished seventh, and the butterfly finished eighth. Twilight and the tortoise were the only two left on the track when the butterfly finished the race.

“…EIGHTH PLACE IS THE BUTTERFLY, WITH A FINAL TIME OF…NINE MINUTES AND 20 SECONDS!” Dash called out, smiling as all eight of her picks from Fluttershy’s house finished the race, “Not bad, not bad at all…nowhere NEAR as good as me, since I could do it in around 15 seconds, but there’s always room for improvement! Falcon, you really killed it out there and…huh?” She glanced back at the track, watching as Twilight limped around and completed only her 24th lap. 

“That…should…be…24 laps…and only 11.2 more to go…” Twilight wheezed, still going as hard as she could, despite the fact she was out of breath and looked ready to faint.

Twilight…why? Dash wondered, tilting her head as she watched the unicorn go, This…this is crazy! You lost…big time! Your time isn’t even gonna matter! Surely you’re smart enough to realize that! Why…why are you doing this? You’re hurt…and you’re tired…Twi, c’mon, just stop…please, just stop! But Twilight didn’t stop, and she wasn’t about to stop, either. She was determined with all her heart to prove Dash wrong on judging pets just from their physical traits. She was gonna prove her wrong no matter how badly it hurt.

Ugh…my legs…they burn… Twilight thought, scrunching up her eyes as she gasped and kept trotting along the track, My hooves feel…like they’re on fire…and the sore on my rear-end…keeps nagging me. And…my headache has only gotten worse…but, no, I WILL complete this game! You always learn more in a loss…than you do in a win…Dash, witness the heart of a REAL winner.

“Twilight, stop this,” Dash said, flapping over to Twilight and joining her during her final 10 laps, “You don’t have to prove anything to me! Sure, you lost…handily…and miserably…and in humiliation fashion. But, big deal? I still love ya as a friend and I don’t think any less of you. Seriously, stop this; you’re gonna get yourself exhausted. Believe me, I know; I’ve seen it happen to Applejack.”

“Forget it…Dash…I’m not quitting…not now, not ever!” Twilight choked out, her breaths becoming labored as she neared the home stretch, “I’m…just as tough as you…but not on the outside…”

“What…are you talking about?” Dash asked, frowning slightly as she kept flapping along with her friend, “No offense, but…you’re nowhere NEAR as tough as me. You’re just a small little pony with hardly any muscle on you, and what’s on the inside that makes you just as tough as me?”

“My heart, Dash…my heart,” Twilight responded, and didn’t say another word as she kept pushing forward with her laps.

Dash flew back to the sidelines and sat down on her haunches, watching one of her best friends push forward to complete something that she had no reason to complete. This wasn’t her library. This wasn’t an assignment from Celestia. This wasn’t an overdue book. This was nothing like that. This was just her fighting to prove to Dash how strong her heart was. The azure Pegasus looked down at the ground, muttering under her breath, while the other flying animals idly pecked at the grass and relaxed around her. 

Her heart…is just as tough as mine? she thought, closing her eyes and trying to understand what she meant, I…I don’t understand. Sure, we’re best buds, but…what is she getting at? The only thing she’s “proving” to me is that she’s insane and doesn’t mind getting herself killed for the sake of a race. This is just to become my pet! Sheez, what is WITH her? Is this REALLY worth it? Twilight…why are you doing this? Really…why?

Ten minutes later, Twilight inched her way across the finish line, and then trotted what she assumed was around .2 of a mile, before collapsing in a heap. Rainbow Dash called her time (37 minutes and 29 seconds), then hurried over to help carry the weak unicorn to the sidelines. There, Rainbow used some smelling salts on her, then gave her a bottle of water while she tried brushing dirt out of her mane and attempted to tend to any minor scrapes that her body had.

“Well…you completed the race…” Dash said softly, shaking her head in disgust, “And it only cost you…well, everything. You realize that this is just the FIRST test, right? Uh…how are you planning on surviving this, Twi?”

“Heh…in the only way I know how, Dash…with my spirit,” Twilight smiled, leaning forward slightly and alternating between taking deep breaths and downing water from the bottle, “As long as I believe that I can do it…I’ll never be a loser. Maybe, just maybe…you’ll finally see what I’m trying to prove.”

“Whatever…crazy unicorn,” Dash muttered, “I swear, you’re all the same…Rarity is no better when she puts her mind to something stupid, and I think…” She paused, since she had just been tending to Twilight’s mangled tail, and since the unicorn had leaned forward, the Pegasus had caught sight of the red bruise that was still on her butt. It was still there, and it looked just as painful as before. Once again, Dash felt her face starting to burn, and when she reached up to feel with her hooves, she realized it was once again her cheeks. She was blushing furiously yet again.

“Dash…I’ll take care of THAT myself,” Twilight sniffed, glancing back and crossing her forelegs. She had caught sight of Rainbow staring at her butt, and while she was a bit curious that the Pegasus was blushing, she focused more on the fact that Dash was staring at her rump and less on the fact that she was blushing about it.

“W-w-what?!?! Oh, um, right…yeah, you just…magic yourself up some ointment and…take care of that then,” Dash muttered, turning away and shaking her head, “It looks like it hurts pretty bad…um, take your time…still plenty of time until the next event. I’ll just, um, let you catch your breath…and stuff.” The Pegasus quickly flew off, leaving the purple unicorn alone. 

“Weird little Pegasus,” Twilight muttered, using her horn to make a bottle of ointment appear, “I hope I’m able to get through to her eventually…ooh, that’s cold!” The unicorn squeezed out some of the cool white ointment cream onto her hooves, leaned forward, and moaned in relief as she began rubbing it over the wound on her tush. 

Back on the racetrack, the tortoise was wheezing as he just finished his fourth lap. He was probably gonna have a DNF, since Dash wasn’t known for her patience.