Dr. Devil and Mr. Hide was a pretty insulting name for a movie starring a thestral, but I rolled with it as Diamond insisted all the magazines were giving it great reviews. We bought our tickets and snacks, then sauntered into the mostly empty theater late on a Sunday night. With work and school in the morning, it was basically just the two of us. Like a cozy little cave, the theater was nice and dim as various ads rolled and the few ponies up this late trickled in.
Aunt Mercy must have snuck in after us, because Mom walked in with a scowl at one point, and there was a very familiar screep and a suddenly empty seat as somepony melted into the shadows and booked it. Muttering under her breath, Mom waved to me and walked back out after glancing around to make sure my Aunt was actually gone.
Seeing her go just made my chest all warm and fluffy. She was such a good mom, keeping her promise like that after chasing my meddlesome aunt out. Too bad the warm and fluffy feeling was dwarfed by the hot flush of shame that came with being caught with Diamond snuggled up against me, insisting we share the same seat.
“My, my~” Nuzzling up into my neck, Diamond tittered softly. “I guess you were right about being caught. Do you want me to stop?” When I was silent and squirming, trapped between her and the seat, she took it as an excuse to nuzzle incessantly for an answer.
“No…” I finally murmured, my tail wrapping around her possessively. Two sets of instincts warred as my heart pounded like a drum. There was still a part of me that wanted to die as I blushed as black as the Nightmare, even after all these years, but Mom was gone, and so I shoved the shame down and out of my mind by briefly shielding us with my wings to give my princess a trail of kisses up her neck. “But if you don’t behave yourself, next time I’m bringing hoofcuffs to keep you in your seat. Understood?”
Fluttering her eyelashes as we both pulled back, Diamond pouted with sinister intent, the force of her weapons-grade face having only gotten stronger as we matured. “You say that like I wouldn’t like it~”
Damn it, Diamond, really?
It was my own fault, to be fair. I set her up for that shot. At the very least, she didn’t push her advantage further, simply turning her pout into a smirk and booping my snoot before she turned back to the screen to start noisily eating her popcorn.
She rested calmly against me, her heart beating calmly as mine ran the gauntlet. My wings rustled stiffly, feeling oh-so-confined as she pressed me back against the seat, and as the lights dimmed further to completely shroud us in gloom save for the flickering screen, it took a significant amount of will not to sink into my shadow just so I could stretch.
There was a brief moment, as thunder rumbled and the opening credits rolled over a wonderfully dark and gloomy night, that I almost lost that fight. The movie, Diamond had said as we bought the tickets, was black and white—a sort of tribute to the old original films. The sound effects were cheap and fabricated. There was no actual thunder, only the crashing and banging of sheet metal to sound like it.
It was a cool trick, but I could hear the difference even through the speakers. As I opened my mouth to ask Diamond about it, however, there was a particularly loud clash of metal, and for just a moment, I had the bizarre thought that the last time I had felt this constrained by somepony had been when Crusty banged his hoof on my locker, breaking the lock and trapping me inside.
I froze, muscles stiffening slightly, as I imagined not Crusty but Diamond in the same position. And my brain almost shut down in horror as it realized I might enjoy being stuffed in a locker by Diamond about as much as I was enjoying her little trap right now.
Gears screeched to a halt, and the smell of burnt guano may have trickled out of my ears in smoke. My body was blazing so hot it actually made Diamond look up at me, frowning.
“Are you alright, Night? I didn’t think I was laying it on that thick.”
I gulped and smiled down. “You weren’t.”
Lies! She was! Don’t give her a load of guano like that!
“I just… had a very strange thought, and I would appreciate you not pestering me on it, okay?” My fangs may have been bared as I forced myself to smile.
“Oooookay?” Tilting her head at me, Diamond flicked an ear before shrugging and turning to lean back against me once more. She couldn’t hide it as her brow furrowed and she frowned deeply in concern. “You sure?”
I shifted my wings and whispered thanks to the Nightmother in a pitch beyond Diamond’s hearing. “I’m sure.” Whether she knew it or not, that frown of hers was helping, and I snuggled close to wrap my hooves around her.
The movie itself was… about as bad as I expected. Good by day dweller standards, but there was no way it wouldn’t have generations of thestrals rolling in their graves. At the very least, Mr. Hide was also a thestral, but he was so meek and well-mannered as to be fangless. He talked like a day dweller, and acted like a day dweller, and I could literally see the actor’s temple twitching as he happily ‘celebrated’ the Summer Sun Celebration where he and his friends were introduced.
Diamond giggled as Mr. Hide bared his fangs in a smile we both knew was meant to be more threatening than friendly, her hoof reaching up to stroke my foreleg as I aggressively slurped my soda. “Gluttons for punishment, all of you. I can’t believe he put up with a script like this. I would have quit, stormed off, and had Daddy sue their pants off.”
“If you look carefully, you can see he’s been basically standing straight this whole scene.” I whispered back. “He can’t go full guard with playing such a pansy, but that face is pretty much by the book. More emotion than usual, but still a facade. See how his ears almost vibrate as they swivel about? He’s beyond pissed about being there.”
“There were rumors that actor almost stormed out at one point.” Diamond hummed. “No pony seemed to know why. Guess this explains it. You wanna leave or keep watching?”
“I’m good to stay.” Clutching Diamond a little closer, I huffed and she giggled as my breath tickled her neck. “I want to see where it goes. Thank you for being so considerate, though.”
Giving her a soft kiss before I returned to watching, I munched on my extra-hot, super-spicy skittles, and watched as the gentle and unassuming Mr. Hide lived up to his namesake. A simple shadow who did his best to make an honest living as a respectable stallion.
Honorable and soft-spoken, given to his duties, he was the captain of the night watch—which surprised me after his horrible introduction—but he showed a lot of strength the more the movie continued. Wherever and whenever a crime occured, he was the first to show and the last to leave, a constant and comforting presence to the ponies who served under him, and especially to the lieutenant who the movie centered around.
And all of this was in contrast to his nemesis, the huge and brutish Dr. Devil.
The other thestral star could not be more crude and tribalist if the director had tried. Where Mr. Hide was slim and the very picture of a gentlestallion, Dr. Devil was a barbaric mass of muscle who delighted in hunting down those he deemed guilty and playing with them like they were nothing but food. The notes he left for the Guard as they attempted to hunt him down were taunting and uncaring for the pain he caused and the fear he spread through the town.
Bit by bit, it drew me in despite the cheesy sounds and other effects. Sure, the movie looked old, but what thestral didn’t like that? And it was a Guard movie!
It had grit! It had feeling! It had—
A discord damned plot twist with as many holes as a changeling’s horn—all driven straight through my armor and into my chest!
“What the buck do you mean Dr. Devil was Mr. Hide?!” I roared and stood up as Lieutenant Udderson was shocked and unable to do more than moo upon reading the suicide note left by his beloved captain deep in the underground lair of Dr. Devil. “How in bucking Equis does that make sense?!”
Diamond, for her part, let out the most adorably undignified squeak as she flopped forward from my sudden stand. Even as she extricated herself from the floor, she shushed me and poked me back down, flashing a smile that beamed even in the dark out to the few other movie-goers now staring up at us.
“O-kay, this movie was definitely a mistake. You mind holding it in until we’re done, Night?” Sidling up to me, she tried to use her earth pony strength to push me back down.
I could have fought if I wanted, but I didn’t as I fell back on my haunches and sighed. The movie was going on about dead parents and predatory instincts and all other kinds of guano, and it was just better to ignore it and cuddle with Diamond as she melted into me and murmured apology after apology.
“Stop apologizing, Diamond, it’s not like you knew.” I sighed softly before silencing her with a kiss. “We both wanted to see the movie, and it’s not like we haven’t seen a few that messed things up even worse. It just… caught me by surprise, I was really starting to like Mr. Hide. He was a good stallion and an honorable guard. This seemed like one of the movies that actually got things somewhat right, but no….” Shaking my head, I closed my eyes. “I guess no matter how good the thestral, we all have a bloodthirsty killer lurking inside us.”
“I really should have done a little more looking into it.” Diamond frowned hard enough that I could feel it as she nuzzled into my chest. “Should I get Daddy to sue them for you? I was just joking before, but this? I’m so sorry I suggested this….”
“No, it’s fine.” With another sigh, I squeezed her tight. “It was still fun, and I got to watch it with you, so it was a million times better.”
“Shamelessly flattering me even now?~” Diamond tittered quietly as the credits started rolling, wriggling closer as I wrapped both hooves and wings around her to stroke her back.
“Mmm… it isn’t shameless if a princess like you deserves every bit of it.” Exhaling through my nose, I smiled as Diamond pressed closer. “Did you have anything else in mind you wanted to do? I know this was all we had planned, but I really don’t want it to end. It’s gonna suck waiting a whole week to do this again.”
“I thought you said your Mom and Aunt were gonna be watching us like a hawk?” As she looked up with a predatory grin, Diamond waggled her brows. “You were the one insisting we keep things to the book not two hours ago after dinner.”
“That was then. This is now.” With a little snort, I chuffed and laid my head across Diamond, further wrapping her in my clutches. “It’s been a while since we went stargazing. How about that? I’m sure if I tell Mom the movie was awful she’ll understand.”
Diamond wordlessly just arched her brow as she gave me her best impression of Silver Spoon.
“What?” I gazed back, face the perfect picture of a stone cold stoic soldier.
“Oh, nothing. I just wasn’t expecting this… pleasant turn of events.” Diamond’s smile was small enough she would have made any veteran Guard proud.
“And just what is that supposed to mean?” My own smirk was just as tiny, but it was beyond smug as a slug.
“I mean that you aren’t one to bend the rules unless it’s important.”
“And?“ Blinking several times, I tilted my head with glacial slowness. “I still don’t get why you’re so surprised here. It is important. You’re important.”
“Mmmm…” Diamond’s humming trailed into the silent and empty theater as the few other ponies filed out. It wore at me—eroded me—turning my tiny smirk into a well-etched frown. “Am I, though?”
“Are you what?” My wings rustled as I squirmed.
“Am I really that important to you?” Diamond shrugged nonchalantly at her own blasphemous words.
My mouth flailed for a few moments as my brain tried to understand not once, not twice, but thrice. “Errr… I don’t think… Why would you… Of course you’re that important to me! How could you even say that?!”
There was another horrible shrug from Diamond that I could feel hammering every bone in my body as she continued to lean back into me. “How could I not think that when my loyal knight is planning to leave me behind and galavant off to some forsaken pit of Tartarus? I know you, Night. I know you’re going to want to throw yourself in the thick of things when you become a Guard.”
“So? That doesn’t… that doesn’t mean you aren’t important to me.” Ears splaying back, I wilted into my shadow a bit. Being pinned between Diamond and the seat was quickly losing its euphoric rush, leaving me confined and trapped with my hackles rising and wings begging to run.
“True.” Diamond nodded. “But I’ve been thinking a lot recently, and I don’t know if I’m that important to you, or even if I should be…. I want to be.” Her hoof burned as it ran down my side. “Believe me. I want it so bad, but… you have your future to think of, and I have mine.”
Taking a long, deep breath, Diamond sighed. “I’ve been stuck wondering stuff like, ‘Is it right for me to wait years for you, not knowing if you’ll return?’ or ‘Is it fair for me to want to keep you closer to home?’ Hay, this past week I’ve been forced to look at whether it was wrong of me to basically push you into fighting Crusty. For all I know, that could complicate things for you down the line, and I just… I’ve been wondering if we’re expecting too much out of this? Should we just be enjoying our last year together and making what memories we can before inevitably breaking it off?”
All of Silver Fang’s warnings echoed hauntingly through my head as the past five years flashed before my eyes. It was just like Hearth’s Warming all those years ago, but so much worse. Diamond’s every word was its own spear to the chest, and I was trapped—unable to run or stop her. Everything that had been going right tonight was suddenly going terribly, terribly wrong, and my brain scrambled for a way to fix it through the pain.
I had bucked up.
I needed to fix it.
I needed to show her.
“Excuse me, but I’m going to have to ask you two to leave the theater so we can—”
I didn’t even let the janitor finish, wrapping my wings around Diamond and melting us both into the shadows. Holding her tight, I let my hooves and wings act as shields, something warm and familiar in the cool chill of night that surrounded us as we fell.
With a bit of luck, I could have dumped us out somewhere just outside the theater and found Mom, but no… we might get interrupted again.
That. Would. Not. Do.
Instead, I pulled us towards the warm, familiar darkness of home, and I plomfed back first into the living room floor with Diamond atop me. I craned my head, and, sure enough, there was Dad on the couch, collapsed and looking far more tired and old than he had any right to be. He’d been that way ever since the fight with Crusty, staying super late at the castle almost every day.
That was probably my fault, too, but I had bigger fish to fry.
“Dad.” I stirred slowly and carefully, momentarily forgetting all the enchantments we’d put on the house for Pushing. I wriggled and twisted to both roll over and rise while keeping Diamond on her pedestal atop me, and once up I moved to lightly nudge the sleeping bear. “Dad, come on! Get up! It’s important.”
Diamond squeaked as Dad snorted to level one eye at us.
“Is the house on fire?”
“No, Dad.” I rolled my eyes. “And that joke stopped being funny years ago.”
“Gotta respect the classics, though.” He groused and growled, stretching to give a massive, fang-filled yawn. “Probably my favorite pegasus Dad joke. What’s the problem, champ?”
“Can you go tell Mom we’re home?” I gently put a hoof on his shoulder. “She’s either still outside the movie theater and wondering where we are, or she’s started hunting us thinking we ran off.”
“Uh, sport? That sounds like you did, in fact, run off.” Dad arched a brow at me, clearly torn between wanting to frown and smile. “Not exactly the night to do that.”
“We didn’t run off. We were talking after the movie and got interrupted.” I schooled my face very, very carefully. “It’s… very important we finish that talk, okay? I’m gonna take Diamond up on the roof so we can do that while stargazing for a bit. You need to go fetch Mom.” Dad’s brow arched further and further the more I went on, but I conquered the urge to squirm and rustle my wings.
“Is that so? Alright, then.” With one more stretch, he got to his hooves and made for the door. “Is Diamond staying the night?”
From her spot atop me, Diamond finally found the courage to open her mouth even as she burned Nightmare black and squirmed like a schoolfilly. “I wouldn’t want to be a bother, so—”
“Yes.”
No backing down or time for retreat—for either of us. I cut Diamond off at the pass, making her squeak in a way I’d only heard a time or two before.
“Understood.” Dad stopped at the door to turn back and smile. “I’ll swing by Filthy’s to let him know, then. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do.”
Giving a good, solid snort, I tossed my head back. “According to Aunt Mercy, there’s not much you and Mom didn’t do back in the day; don’t get your hopes up.”
“Haha! Just covering my bases, sport.” With a big, rumbling laugh, Dad turned and opened the door. “If you say it’s just a talk, I know it’s a talk.” Waving a hoof in farewell, he stepped through the threshold and was gone, leaving me and Diamond all alone.
“You didn’t have to do that.” It was Diamond who spoke first, hugging my neck tight as she rested on my back.
“We both know that’s not true.” Looking back at her, I brought my snoot to hers and gently pressed. “So, then, let’s go talk on the roof, yeah?”
I carried her gently, with all the care a princess deserves. Through the halls and to the bathroom, I took her right beneath a good spot, and with a lazy flap of my wings I pushed us up and through the ceiling, swiping the clouds smoothly back into place with a sweep of my tail and a stomp of my hind hoof. Another leap vaulted us up and onto the top of Pushing’s room and put us at the highest point of the house; it was there I pushed some clouds into a lovenest perfectly sized for two.
“I’d… rather stay on top if that’s alright.” Diamond burned with the intensity of a thousand suns as she spoke, but I was happy to lay down on my back and let her snuggle into my chest floof. Humming happily at the contact, my cheeks burnt like toast as I waited for her to settle, cool off, and stop squirming.
“Okay, princess. Let’s set something straight.” Keeping my eyes locked on hers, I smiled. “You are the most important pony in my life right now. Mom and Dad? They’re just my inspiration. You are my moonlight. You’re the reason I strive to be better, the one who pushes me above and beyond, and the pony I would literally fight the Nightmare itself for. Hay, I might even challenge the Princesses themselves for you, that’s how important you are, understand?”
The more I talked, the more Diamond’s eyes sparkled like the star-speckled sky behind her. She sniffed as I finished, and then buried her muzzle in my chest with a strangled gasp halfway between a squee and a sob. Her earth pony hooves tried to crush me with their brutal, built-in strength, but I was her rock, sink or swim.
She never really said anything—didn’t need to. Our bodies did the talking as she snuggled close and I whispered sweet nothings in her ear. If she still had doubts down the road? Then I would simply prove my intentions again.
I was her gallant knight, and she was my precious princess, no matter how far apart or how many years passed. She was mine, and I was hers. That was all that really mattered.
“Mrgmrfff….” Diamond sniffed once more into my chest before looking up. “I love you….”
“I love you, too.” Leaning down to nuzzle her, I turned my gaze to the stars and moon above.
It didn’t matter, right?
…right?