//------------------------------// // Day 3 - Storm: 8/11 // Story: They're... ON HOLIDAY? // by Nameless Narrator //------------------------------// The casino is filled with creatures busy trying to fill the rainy afternoon. Among those are two muscular zebras wearing two-piece swimsuits each, presumably in hopes of later going swimming into the indoor pool two floors down, but in reality to draw the attention of the gaming patrons, and it certainly is working. Zemi rubs against a griffon who just rolled a lucky pair of dice with a seductive, red lipstick-laced smile. “You’re on a roll, lion,” she whispers into his ear, “Care to buy a thirsty desert mare a drink.” The griffon’s eyes widen as he takes in the spectacle that is the zebra bodyguard, but he controls himself and slides several chips towards her. “It’s all skill, babe,” he replies, “But even the best could use something to rub for good luck,” he presents his talons holding a pair of dice, “Or maybe a kiss.” With a seductive smile, Zemi puts her mouth to his fist and blows on it. “I prefer taking it slow,” she says in a deep voice, but freezes as she catches something from the corner of her eye. Straightening up, she turns towards her zebra companion and whispers into her ear, “Zara, this guy’s an easy mark. Take it for me for a minute and get us something to drink, will you?” The second zebra nods and takes Zemi’s place as the griffon watches Zemi head off in the direction of the bathrooms. “Where is she-?” “My friend just went to freshen up for you,” says his new zebra ‘trophy’, “I’ll be more than happy to keep you company in the meantime,” she leans towards his ear, “And if you’re lucky enough today, your luck might just continue even tonight…” *** Having left smaller Zara to entertain the griffon, Zemi enters the short hallway leading towards the bathrooms. She’s not worried about her bodyguard companion. In her experience, griffons love someone smaller to feel dominant over and, despite her size, Zara can easily bend the griffon’s spine into a pretzel if he tries anything. In Zemi’s mind, posing as a casino trophy is an innocent activity, mostly. In general, stallions don’t get to be close to mares as physically fit as the bodyguards, so they let their guard down when met with some compliments. It nets the mares free drinks, company they can leave whenever it grows stale, and the girls know not to take things too far and lead their marks on. Despite Baron 1313’s and Zamira’s lack of etiquette requirements, no member of Zamira’s unit wants to shed bad light on the Northern San Palomino delegation because, no matter what, it sure beats working for that sleazebag Blueblood.  The strangeness that caught her attention is difficult to explain, being more a sense of several small things not fitting together rather than one big problem. She, herself, isn’t sure what caused her to leave, and goes through a mental checklist of her own. One - a changeling went to the bathroom. No reason to do that, but nothing wrong with that, per se. Two - the changeling was the slightly bigger but dumber one. Three - the changeling was carrying a small pile of chips on its back for some reason. Four - shortly before that, she saw other changelings win big at something. Five… Five - a stereotypical coke fiend went in there shortly before the changeling. *Click!* *Whirr!* *Clap clap clap!* *Click!* *Whirr!* *Clap clap clap!* *Click!* *Whirr!* *Clap clap clap!* Zemi stops in front of the stallions’ bathroom, listening to the repeating sequence of noises for a while before entering and getting assaulted by even more nonsense. The changeling is sitting in the corner of the room under the condom dispenser, surrounded by colorful wrappers strewn around it. It briefly looks at her, then puts a chip from a now much smaller pile into the machine’s slot, pokes a button seemingly at random, the machine whirrs, a wrapped condom drops out, and the changeling claps its hooves together with a happy smile. As the zebra approaches it, her head tilted in utter confusion, the changeling moves the wrapped condom onto an unsorted pile to its right. On its left, there are several individual condoms, each in a different color. Nothing is unwrapped, and the changeling doesn’t seem particularly interested in the discarded ones. “Hell-o?” Zemi leans closer. The changeling beams at her, looks around, and finally pushes several condoms from the unsorted pile towards her. In every other case the zebra would know what this is about. Now, she doesn’t have a clue. Someone walks out of the stall on the side of the room and their hoofsteps stop. “Keep moving,” says Zemi with only a quick glance revealing a stallion with the remains of white powder under its nose, “Wipe your muzzle better, and don’t pretend that a zebra wearing a swimsuit, a changeling, and enough condoms for a small platoon never played a role in your dreams.” The stallion quickly washes his hooves and face and rushes off. “You… have no idea what these are for, have you?” asks Zemi. The changeling only tilts its head, offering her a small pile with its hooves again. After some thinking, she takes one and unwraps it, earning a dropped jaw from the changeling and a curious sniffing of the scented condom itself, “On the other stripe, this might make for a good bait and switch party story,” she smirks and blows the unwrapped condom into a balloon before tying the end into a knot and releasing it into the air. The changeling pokes it with its muzzle, making it float off in an arc. She walks a bit off, and then bounces the balloon back. I’m inside a casino on a cruise ship in international waters, and I’m bouncing a condom ball through the air with a mentally challenged changeling. Seeing the pure joy in the changeling’s face as it bounces the ball back towards her with its nose, Zemi can’t help thinking: …and I don’t really mind. Maybe Zamira wasn’t wrong about settling down after all these years. Maybe this San Palomino posting won’t be just another in a long line of gigs. *** The darkness of the hive mind waiting room is filled with panicking drones. “Does anyone know where either 1313 or Miss Gem are now?” asks 10013, “With no high ranks available, I think they’re the only ones who can help.” “Eeep!” 99526 mentally winces. “Nope, sorry,” 99380 shakes its head, “I can try calling. Miss 93 said I could do hive mind speech better than you guys for some reason.” “Please, do,” 10013 nods. In the real world, however, the clumped up drones are standing by the roulette table, facing bouncers, the croupier, and a bunch of fuming patrons. “What? How were we cheating?!” huffs 36658 indignantly, glaring at the trio of bouncers nearly four times its size. “No one can have luck like that,” rumbles the leader, “So it’s got to be magic.” “That’s goop!” 36658 rises onto the tips of its hooves, still barely reaching up to the bouncer’s neck, ”Magic is pony stuff! Do we look like ponies to you?” after sitting down, the drone raises its foreleg and points to it with the other, “LEG. HOLES.” “Changeling magic,” rumbles the leading bouncer who, 10013 is beginning to think, has roughly Smiley’s level of vocabulary, “You’re a cheating bunch.” “Stop calling my buddy a cheater you… you… big dummy rumbler!” 36658 is too angry to be scared, which might just be history's second for a drone. 10013, who has been silent so far, clears its throat and raises its foreleg, earning the glares of all three bouncers. “Your… pony who controls the spin- roulette, said you had the best magical alarms just for this case. Did we trigger those in some way?” asks the leading drone with a plan in mind. “No, but what happened over the course of this session was impossible,” says the croupier, emboldened by the agreement of several patrons clearly angry at 20100 sitting on the table next to a pile of chips bigger than itself, “That’s why I have to assume the alarms aren’t properly calibrated-” now he earns the glares of the patrons, adding, “-and we’re willing to roll back the results of last few games, don’t worry, as soon as we solve this issue.” “I doubt that will be necessary,” says a stern male voice behind the bouncers, “We have enough experience with changeling magic to identify it rather easily.” “Who do you think you- oh… uhh, welcome, sir,” the croupier reels back as if struck when a unicorn shoves the biggest bouncer aside and looks around with a friendly smile. The stallion is a blueprint of a classical unicorn with his pristine white coat and shaggy blond mane, short beard rimming his chin, and unkempt tail. He looks in his forties but incredibly well maintained and fit, although the look in his eyes, if someone had the experience, might hint at him being much older. His cutie mark is a greatsword on the backdrop of a sun which in shape mirrors princess Celestia’s herself. However, the main thing about him which stops the situation in its tracks is an amulet of the sun, marking him as a high ranking member of the Paladins, “What brings you here?” asks the croupier. “My apprentice here does,” the paladin nods back to a changeling infiltrator measuring the situation with narrowed eyes. When faced with the annoyed looks of the bouncers, the changeling taps on a sun talisman similar to the unicorn’s hanging around his neck, “From what I gathered, these little guys were confused about what was going on and called for help. Since no member of their delegation was nearby, Ten here asked me to help investigate. Name’s Bright Star,” the unicorn gives everyone a courteous nod, “Care to enlighten us regarding the situation?”    A brief round of explanations about presumed cheating and 20100’s winning streak later, Bright Star rubs his chin and looks at Ten. “Have you ever heard about anything like this?” “Most ranking hive members know little to nothing about drones, and in the same way my experience is limited,” shrugs Ten, “A quick scan of their minds showed me that they’ve definitely not intended to cheat in any way. On the other hole, it is possible that they might have instinctively done something I can’t find without a deeper dig into their heads, which might be grounds for retaliation from Queen Chrysalis herself.” “Then I propose an experiment,” says Bright Star, “I’m somewhat of a changeling expert in my order, and my friend here has very little loyalty to the hive, so we should be able to identify any magic being used. How about a few rounds between friends?” he jingles a small pouch of chips. “I still have to call the manager, sir,” the croupier's demeanor changes dramatically. “Of course,” Bright Star nods, “The more authorities see this, the better, no matter the result,” he looks down at 10013, “How about that, little one?” “Sure,” 10013 shrugs, “We know 20100 isn’t cheating, right?” it looks towards the table on which 20100 is sitting and waiting for the situation to unfold. “I just say the numbers and colors I like…” mumbles 20100 mournfully, ”I didn’t think I’d get us in trouble for that. If I knew that I’d stick to my drawings…” The croupier trots off and returns quickly with a unicorn wearing a suit. Too quickly, which points to him already knowing about this and being ready to step in. “What is this about cheating changelings?” the manager throws a haughty look towards 20100 who pulls its head between its shoulders. “A-hem!” finally fed up, 65536 flies up next to 20100 and pats it to cheer it up, “I know I’m off duty but this has gone too far,” it looks at the manager, “One more cheating allegation and I’m reporting this,” it pulls out a Nightguard badge from the pouch around its neck. “Reporting what?” the manager sneers, “We’re a private company plus we’re outside Equestrian borders at the moment.” “Refusal of service based on species-” growls Ten but stops when Bright Star raises his foreleg. “Everypony calm down, please. First, let’s test for cheating and see where we go from there, shall we?” Several rounds of roulette later and spells being cast in between them, Bright Star and Ten exchange disbelieving glances when the increasingly unhappy 20100’s pile of chips only grows. Next, 20100 gives some chips to 36658 who does its best but loses them quickly to the house. The same thing repeats with Ten and 65536 to cover all bases. In the final round of roulette, the wheel stops just before the ball hits the segment stated by 20100, the ball on the top of the roulette wheel used to spin the thing starts glowing in tune with a bracelet on the croupier’s foreleg and the same happens with the bouncers. As the manager touches the glowing ball, a strand of light points at Bright Star. “Huh?” 20100’s ears perk up, “I guessed wrong?” the drone almost looks happy about it considering how much trouble it brought. “No, I stopped it while masking my magic,” says Bright Star, “Looks like your alarm works just fine.”  “See?” the manager shoots a meaningful glare to the paladin. “That this proves the changeling did nothing wrong? Yes, I see that,” the paladin easily wins the staring contest, making the manager look down with his sharp tone, “That changelings have no idea about hedging bets, about probability, and how to properly play roulette based on statistics? Yes, I see that too. What we’re dealing with here is a changeling who is unnaturally lucky at roulette, simple as that. The real question is - what to do with that? With witnesses everywhere around, you can’t just refuse them service. You’re still an Equestrian company. I also understand that letting the changeling play would ruin your roulette table. Any ideas?” “I don’t think I even want all these chippies when it’s that much trouble…” 20100 lies down on the table and covers its head with its forelegs. The manager thinks for a moment before slowly saying: “Neither our alarms nor your specialist spells caught anything so, as you stated, it would be unlawful for us to take the changeling’s winnings away. Of course, ruining the game for all other patrons would cause so much more damage that it wouldn’t be worth it. So… how about this?” he looks at 20100, “You keep your winnings, but you stay away from roulette, and you don’t cash in the chips afterwards. Instead you use them as currency for the ship’s services, which is of course possible for the convenience of all patrons.” “That deal is so one-sided that if I facehoof at the sheer unfairness I’ll punch my skull out,” scowls Ten. 20100 sits back up, furrows its brows, and looks at 10013 who asks: “So… all that means is that we can’t trade those back for shinies, right?” “Shin-” the manager gives the drone a somewhat annoyed look, “Do you mean bits? If so, then yes.” “Yes, it does,” replies 65536 instead. “If 65536 says that then I do. It knows your pony stuff,” 10013 nods.  All drones exchange glances. “So that means we gotta spend it here, right? On anything?” 10013 keeps probing. “Yes,” says Ten, interupting the manager, “But all you achieve by doing that is saving Chrysalis some money from the servant spending account, and trust me that she can live with-” “Umm, the Queen didn’t set that up,” says 65536, “I had ice cream with 99380 yesterday and the seller lady said she didn’t do that.” Ten facehoofs. “You know, I don’t know what I was thinking,” rolling his eyes, he shrugs, “Screw her then, go wild.” Earning a direct approval from a high rank, even one not associated with the hive, the drones perk up immediately. “Well, do we have a deal?” asks the manager, clearly taking a breath of relief. Everyone looks at 10013, even 20100 whose chips those are. “65536, is it a good deal?” it asks mentally. “Incredibly,” 65536 smirks, “Especially when 20100 didn’t tell them about the slot machines. You can try anything this cruise offers now and you can always come grab some chips here if you don’t overdo it.” “Are you okay with the terms, 20100?” “If I’m getting this right… no one’s mad at us anymore, we can use these for icy cream and other stuff and I can always grab more, and all it cost me was the few shinies I brought with me from my stash?” 20100 can’t believe this lucky resolution. “Yup!” say both 65536 and 10013. Accord reached, 10013 speaks out loud: “We do!”  “Excellent!” the manager smiles, nodding towards the bouncers, “I believe we’re done here.” As they turn around to leave, they all freeze, just like all the nearest casino patrons, all staring at Smiley leaving the bathroom with lipstick kiss mark on the side of its muzzle, a string of wrapped condoms around its neck, and accompanied by a zebra wearing a swimsuit. Blissfully ignorant of the shocked looks of everyone, Smiley walks towards the drones, bouncing a blown-up condom on its head. As if nothing happened, 10013 waves at Smiley. “Heya, buddy. We got a whole bunch of chippies, wanna try some icy cream?” Zemi blinks when she notices the huge pile on the table, and walks past the stunned bouncers, paladins, and everyone else. “Care to buy a thirsty mare a drink, changelings?” “Is she a friend?” asks 20100. “I think she’s with 1313 and his lady friend. They’re pretty nice!” replies 10013. “Plus, it looks like she was taking care of Smiley while we were busy,” adds 36658. *HAPPY FACE!* “That’s settled, then.” 20100 nods. “Sure thing, stripey friend!” cheers 20100, offering Zemi a hoofful of chips easily worth near a hundred bits, “There ya go! Any ideas where we could spend them?” “I’m sure I can think of something,” Zemi smiles.