//------------------------------// // Meaning Behind the Shield // Story: I Live With a Monster // by daOtterGuy //------------------------------// I live with a monster. But it hadn’t started like that.  Life had been good, for a time. I had my mom, Twilight Velvet, and dad, Night Light. I got everything I asked for. All the treats and toys I could ever want. It was fun, I was happy.  Then my fifth birthday arrived. Mom and dad had planned a small party for me that day. We were going to eat cake, and I would get tons of wrapped gifts. In my excitement on waking up, I galloped down the hall and accidentally bumped into an old urn. It had slipped off its pedestal and shattered on the floors of the hallway. I hadn’t meant to do that, but it had happened and I was readying to apologize to my parents when they got there. But they didn’t come. The monster did. It was pitch black like the tar in my adventure books. A multitude of red eyes covered its pony-shaped body as shadowy tendrils whipped around its head. I was scared. I didn’t know what the monster was, but I wanted my dad because he would protect me. So, I cried out for him, screaming it as loud as I could, desperation in my voice. Then it hurt me. A quick slap across the face. I had been so shocked at the time that I had stopped. It had been the first time I’d ever felt pain like that. It was nothing like the typical foalhood bruises and scrapes I was used to. When I’d finally quieted down, the monster left. I slunk downstairs and sat at the table in stunned silence. My parents arrived shortly after. Dad panicked when he saw the red welt on my face and asked how I’d gotten hurt. I told him about the monster and my dad had been horrified. But mom told me that the monster was natural, that it always showed up when foals did bad things. And that it was my fault the monster appeared. We celebrated my birthday then. The cake had been bitter, the gifts dull. I know that I should enjoy these things, but all I could focus on was the fear inside me and the desperate hope that the monster would never show itself again. I would be a good colt, so I never gave it a reason to come back. But I did see it again.  And it only got more frequent as I got older.  Whenever I got bad grades in school, it appeared. Whenever I messed up my chores, it appeared. Whenever I was too loud, it appeared. And so it would go as the monster became bigger, stronger, and scarier with every encounter I had with it. It used to only be the size of my parents, but soon its head scraped against the ceiling along with the many racks of horns that grew from its head. Its eyes multiplied in number, all the better to catch me when I misbehaved. Its frame grew until it could barely contain itself within the walls of my home. I had learned to know when it was coming. A cold dread would cause my body to shake in place. I would hear its every step, a loud thump, thump as it approached. Readying to punish me for my misdeeds. To hurt me. Until one day it stopped.  When I turned eight, the monster disappeared. Paranoia would not allow me to relax, for one day it could return. I obeyed every rule, did everything I was asked, until, after several months, my baby sister was born. Twilight Sparkle.  She was everything to me from the first day I saw her. My baby sister. I looked after her, took care of her, and protected her from harm. Everything a big brother should do. I loved how joyful she was, a bundle of sunshine in the muggy swamp of my fearful anticipation. My fears soon became justified as the monster came back. It was a magic surge. Perfectly normal for a three year old unicorn. We'd been playing in her room, book forts erected to protect the Rulers of Book and Shield. But a burst of magic caused it all to go flying across the room. I’d hugged her close when she cried about how sorry she was and I’d told her it was fine.  She’d done nothing wrong. Thump, thump, down the hall. I knew that sound. The monster was coming. Holding Twilight tightly, I turned in horror to witness it slink into the room, bigger than it had ever been before. Now a mismatch of ferocious beasts all biting at the chance to punish my sister.  It was going to hurt Twilight. Before I’d even thought about it, I’d already made the decision. I told the monster it was my fault. I’d caused the damage. The welts on my side permanently scarred me that day. As would the others in the coming years.  But the shield on my flanks that appeared afterwards guaranteed I would always look at my injuries with pride. Eventually, the monster got to Twilight. I had been sixteen at the time. She was crying in bed, trying to sleep so the monster wouldn’t come back, but unable to out of fear. I couldn’t even describe the hurt I’d felt seeing the red welt on her face. I climbed into bed with her and held her in my hooves, soothingly telling her that she would be fine.  When the monster inevitably came, its shadow loomed over us. It demanded I move. I refused and pulled my sister closer to me, using my body as a shield to keep her safe from the thing that wished her harm. It stood over us for a time before, finally, it left.  “Goodbye, mom,” I called out. After several hours of holding her close, Twilight and I both fell asleep. Twilight safe, but I was as scared of the monster as the first day it had appeared.