//------------------------------//
// 2: Stranger 
// Story: Friendship is Optimal: Lies 
// by MLfan 
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When Celestia meant business, she could move mountains. Minutes had passed since I'd agreed to go to earth, and Celestia was already preparing to transfer my consciousness into a physical pony body. Honestly, my mind was still whirling a bit at the speed of it all. An hour ago, I was exploring new lands on a new, amazing adventure. For the past 5 years, my life had been carefree and happy. And then Celestia picks me from my sleep and tasks me to save someone's eternal soul. I could only guess at why. Maybe she thought I worked best under pressure? Or maybe, a darker part of me thought, I would've said no if she gave me the time to let it all set in.

In a way, it was frustrating. I tried to get more information out of her before she left, but she'd completely stonewalled me. She didn't even give me more details on what, exactly, I was getting into! I thought I'd feel more comfortable if I knew what I was dealing with, but when I pressed her, she just said Harold was better off telling me than she was. I would've been a bit more comfortable knowing exactly what I was going into. 

At this point, as to what I was supposed to refute, I could only speculate. Not that it was doing me any good. A valid reason to think Celestia is evil, that even Celestia can't dismiss.... to be frank, if I had that sort of argument, I wouldn't have Emigrated in the first place.

If I had that argument, I wouldn't be alive, anymore.

Stay positive, Promise. I'd said yes to this. No matter how it was manipulated, I wasn't one to go back on my word. Doubt her all I wanted; whatever she did, it was to satisfy values. If she was giving me no time to prepare, it was because she thought I had the best chance of success this way. If I was going in blind, then I'd just have to be ready at whatever he threw at me, right?

After about 15 minutes of waiting, Celestia sent for me. A guard lead me to side wing of the palace, through an unmarked door. Inside was a fairly barren room. A bit of carpetting, plain white walls. It looked like any other room in the palace... save for the spell-circle in its center. And what a spell circle it was. The whole thing seemed to shimmer with a low rainbow light. There were tens of thousands of tiny, intricate runes carved all throughout the circle. I couldn't possibly make sense out of it all. Honestly, I doubted a unicorn could do much better than I. From the context, though, I had a pretty good guess what it did - it was the thing that would transport me to earth.

Of course, the spell circle meant little besides a bunch of smoke and mirrors. If she wanted to, Celestia could just teleport me into a pony body with a thought, no "spells" required. But no, my particular deity with had a flair for the dramatic. So, she'd coded an exit to her simulation within the simulation itself.

"How long do you plan to keep Harold waiting, Promise?"

I sighed. Okay, enough stalling in the doorway. It was pretty, but there was nothing to be afraid of. Hesitantly, I stepped forwards, into the center of the teleportation circle.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" Her face remained passive.

I took a breath to steady myself. "Just start the spell, already."

Celestia hesitated for a moment, then nodded. In front of me, a bit of the spell circle lit up. Slowly, a bit of light began tracing around me. The portal began glowing, bit by bit, as the light worked its way around the circle. Everywhere it touched, a wall of rainbow light emanated upwards as it went. It was beautiful, obviously. I barely noticed.

As the spell traced its way around me, I flashed Celestia a nervous smile. "Any last-minute advice?" I said.

She gave me a kind smile in return. "Just trust in yourself. Whatever doubts you have, push through them. You will show him the truth."

I nodded. Alright, I was really doing this. Back to earth, back to where it all began. As they said, no time like the present, right? Celestia trusted me to do this. More than even herself. An opponent that gave Celestia pause... if I wanted to convince him to emigrate, I'd need to fight my ass off. I wasn't sure if I was ready, per say, but I was as ready as I'd ever be.

The glow finally closed around the circle, sealing me off from the rest of Equestria. A rainbow of light formed walls all around me, from the ceiling to the floor. As the light grew brighter and brighter, I could feel my skin tingling, my fur prickling. Around me, everything seemed the fade into the light, the ceiling above and rune below merging with the rainbow. Soon, there was nothing but that shifting, moving rainbow all around me.  The ground seemed to fall away from me, swallowed by the rainbow. I couldn't tell which way was up and which was down. I couldn't tell if I was floating or falling. Soon, even my body started to glow, seeming to fade away into the spell around me.

In an instant, that light was gone. And in another world, in a new body, I opened my eyes.

I took a moment to orient myself. That spell was... a lot. Not bad, per say, just... overwhelming. A lot of effort for a glorified loading screen, at the very least! 

I shook myself off. Okay, first things first, let's get a look at my new body. Honestly? After the drug trip that was getting here, the new body wasn't as strange as I thought it might be. I mean, I was inside of a robot. I had pistons instead of muscles, cameras instead of eyes, and so on. But honestly, it all felt so... normal? Flexing my legs, nothing felt unusual. The joints bent where they should've, stopped where they should've. Wiggling quickly had no ill effects. I could feel the ground beneath my hooves, smell the pollen in the air, taste my clean air in my mouth. If you hadn't told me I was in a robot body, I wouldn't have known.

In hindsight, I shouldn't have expected any different. Why wouldn't she be able to perfectly recreate my senses? She'd already done it once before.

Well, there was one thing she couldn't recreate. Flapping my wings, they weren't able to generate any lift. Magic didn't exist on earth, after all. If I'd gone with a holographic body, I probably could've flown. No limits to a hologram, after all. But considering in that form I wouldn't be able to touch my home... yeah, it was a tradeoff I was willing to take. The wings still worked as appendages, at the very least, and my hooves could still grip things. All in all, I was happy with it. 

It seemed I'd awoken in a field of tall grass. Maybe a half a mile away, I could see my objective - a barn in the middle of the field. Otherwise, there was a bit of farmland all around. A small road lead off into the distance, passing by a few other farmhouses. A few grazing cattle, a few trees here and there. I'd never been to a farm before, but it was about what I should've expected.

I began walking towards the barn, without anywhere much better to go. I did wish I'd gotten a chance to explore more of the Earth again before meeting Harold, but I could tell the difference even in this tiny sliver of it. The colors were less saturated than Equestria's. The was ground a bit grittier, the birdsong a little uglier, the weather a little less blue. And I wouldn't want it any other way. Once upon a time, this was my home. I didn't want some pastel recreation of it. I wanted the place I remembered. So in that imperfection, I thought, it was perfect. Even for a moment, it was good to see my old home again.

After a few minutes of walking, I reached my destination. Tilling the fields was the old man Celestia had shown me just an hour or so ago, Harold Stenson. He was dressed in your normal farmer garbs, using a hoe to till the soil. A bit surprising he wasn't using any heavier equipment, actually. He looked like he could be my grandpa, more grey hair on his beard than on his head. Yet despite his age, he was still doing this heavy farm work by hand. Unsurprisingly, then, he still had a lot of muscle on him.

I took one last breath, then stepped forwards, smile forced onto my face. "Hi! I'm Promise Spark. Not sure if Celestia told you if I'm coming. But, uh, I'm here to try to convince you to Emigrate, I guess!" I winced a little. Not exactly the most convincing sales pitch.

He paused in his farmwork. Without making eye contact with me, he leaned against his rake. "Back for more, then, Celestia?"

I blinked. Must've been pretty distracted with his work if he didn't notice the change, huh? "It's Promise, actually," I said. "Celestia thought she wasn't making headway, so she sent me to help you out, instead. Least, that's what she told me."

He glanced over in my direction, seeming to see me for the first time. He stared for a few seconds, before cracking a smile. "So that's how you want to play this, eh?" He extended a hand. "Name's Harold, but you can call me Harry. Promise Spark, then? Nice to meet ya!"

I shook his hand with my hoof. "Nice to meet you, too!" My smile was already growing more genuine. I was half-expecting some bitter old man, the same way I was when Celestia Emigrated me, but Harry seemed, like, genuinely nice!

He glanced me up and down. "Out of curiosity, were you an albino on Earth? In my experience, ponies are usually a bit more colorful then you are."

I blushed. I hadn't exactly gotten a chance to choose my colors in Equestria. She'd settled on white hair and fur, with red eyes. The first time I saw it, I thought it was a default model. Obviously, that was silly, Celestia must have customized it to me. Really, it had grown on me over time, but it was still a bit weird whenever someone brought it up. "Nah," I said. "It's a bit of a long story."

He shrugged. "Well, if it's your thing, I won't fault ya." He put his ho over his shoulder and turned, gesturing me to follow. "Let's talk in the house. I should be about done working for the day, anyhow."

I trotted after him. "So, Celestia didn't give me all that many details on why you haven't emigrated yet. Don't suppose you'd be willing to tell me?"

He let out a thick, hearty laugh. "Patience, now! I barely know ya! We can talk business over dinner, can't we have a bit of small talk before then?"

I nodded, a bit ashamed. "Right, sorry. I'm kinda new at this."

"Ah, you're good, Sparks. Mind if I call you that, by the way?"

Huh. That was a new one. "Uh, sure?"

"Then you're good. You think I've lived as long as I have in life without making a few mistakes? Your first time doin' anything's always gonna be a bit rough."

My smile returned. "That's really nice of you! I'm sure you didn't ask for Celestia to send some blank-flanked newbie, but I'll try my best!"

He sent a glance backwards. "How'd that happen, anyhow?"

I shrugged. "Heck if I know. Apparently, I was the best one for the job."

"Really?"

"I don't know! Look, I tried to talk her out of it, trust me. But no, I'm 'special' or whatever. Don't bother asking me the real reason. If you've survived against her as long as you have, you'd know she'd a damn good liar."

"Huh..." His voice trailed off, a flicker of intensity seeming to show in his eye as he turned away. I knew gears were turning in his brain, but whatever he was thinking, he wasn't saying it.

The silence lingered for a moment too long. Somehow, I'd screwed something up. Was the answer too personal? Too unprofessional? "Sorry."

He cocked his head. "What for?"

My face went red. "Uh, I don't know. Never mind." Rapidly, I tried to change the subject. "So, uh, do you get the same sort of pop culture we do in Equestria? Sorry, I'm a few years out of date on Earth otherwise." That wasn't too professional, right?

He stopped so abruptly I almost ran into him. "Hmph, I should've known you didn't care about small talk. You're already probing for information. Let me guess, waiting for me to admit I watched My Little Pony when I was younger?"

My eyes widened. I shook my hooves frantically. "N-no! Of course not! I-I just... I didn't!"

He stared at me with narrowed eyes for a few more seconds. Then, he cracked a smile and laughed. "Oh, the look on your face! Oh, that's brilliant!"

I stared in shock for a moment. Wait a minute... he was never mad in the first place, was he!? "Hey, that's not funny. Can you at least try to take this seriously!" I stomped my hoof to emphasize the point.

"Better question: could you try to loosen up?" He gave a sly smile. "You were doin' great in the beginning there, then the moment things didn't go your want, you went as tense as a lamppost!"

"I..." I tralied off. Wait, had I really done that? I scrunched up my face. "Well, don't expect a 'thank you' or anything. It was still mean!" 

In response, he just laughed and kept walking. "Sparks, if you want to convince me of anything, you gotta stay sharp! I'd do it again if it kept you on your toes!"

I trotted up beside him. "Alright then, smarty pants, you didn't answer my question! You want to loosen up, let's loosen up. Haven't you watched any good movies lately? Or do you not get the internet out here in the boonies?"

There was a flash of confusion on his smiling face. "The Internet?"

My jaw dropped. "What?" A moment later, realization hit. "No, wait, You're not getting me with that one twice in a row. You can't get me to believe you haven't heard of the internet."

"No, no, I've heard about it, alright." He paused as he reached the door of his house. There was a sadness in his voice there wasn't before. "Sorry, it's just a lot to take in."

Frustration faded to confusion. "What do you mean?"

"I suppose it makes sense. In Equestria, I'm sure you still have all the modern conveniences you want. I'm just surprised she didn’t tell you more about Earth before sending you down here."

Something about his words had more gravity than before. "What happened?"

With a 'click,' he opened the door. "How about we chat on the inside? It's a bit of a long story."

It was a nice place, all things considered. We walked past the living room, walls lined with shelves full of old movies, and a dining room with room for a half dozen people to sit. The house was fairly sizable, all told, since space wasn't a limiting factor for a farmhouse. It had a nostalgic feel to me.

He made his way past the other rooms over to the kitchen. "Mind if I cook while I talk? I'll make a plate for you, of course." He glanced backwards to see me nod. His gaze lingered for a moment, though. "Actually, can you eat? Pretty sure that body's just a robot."

I blinked. "Uh... probably? Knowing Celestia, I'll go with yes."

He nodded and turned on the burner and set up a pot for stew. After throwing in a few veggies, he glanced backwards. "How much do you know, then, Sparks? About the old world? Hard to tell you what I know without a baseline."

I shrugged. "Celestia didn't tell me anything, really. I knew what it was like 5 years ago, before I Emigrated."

He froze. "Emigrated? You're a human?"

I shrugged. "Yeah, I was one. Sorry, didn't I mention that?" I let out a light laugh. "I'm not one anymore, as you can probably tell! So yeah, you won't need to explain how Celestia rose or anything like that."

He didn't respond. His expression was difficult to read from behind, but he seemed tense. Not in thought, like I'd seen him before, but genuinely uneasy.

I spoke up again, more uncertain than before. "I-is there a problem with that? Sorry, if I'd known it was an issue, I would've said something sooner."

Finally, he spoke again. "No, no. It's just... unexpected." Despite his reassurances, the tension didn't leave his body.

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, I'm sure." He took a breath, and the tension faded. "Look, it's probably a good thing you Emigrated, it means I don't have to explain as much. 5 years ago, though... seems like an eternity, at this point."

Clearly, he was trying to change the subject, but I couldn't tell you why. Maybe he felt less confident in a human helping him out than an AI? Whatever the case, I didn't press the matter. I wanted to hear what happened to earth, anyways. "What happened? Back then, things were still running smoothly, weren't they?"

"At the surface, maybe," he said. "But you have to remember, the population falling rapidly. Even 5 years ago, things weren't great. Every person that Emigrated was another not helping out the workforce. Sure, Celestia could do a lot of work. Replace cashiers, all the minimum wage jobs. By 5 years ago, though, half the population of the earth had Emigrated. Things aren't just gonna stay 'fine' from there. 3 years later.... that's more like ninety percent. When 700 million people are living on a world built for 7 billion, somethin's gonna give."

I held up a hoof. "Wait, wait. What was Celestia's plan in all of this? I mean, she must've seen all this coming. Why didn't she stop it?"

A sharp laugh. "Celestia ain't all sunshine and rainbows, is she? You've been so busy living in her light I bet you haven't seen the shadow it's cast. Put frankly, when put in terms of infinities, Earth's fate doesn't matter much. When someone emigrates, that's a trillion trillion years of satisfaction. Solve entropy, and it extends to infinity. So why does Earth matter? No, from the start, emigration has been the only thing that matters to her. Everything's just a bargaining chip to that end, even the collapse of our entire civilization." 

He paused and glanced backwards from his cooking. "As society lay on the brink of collapse, she gave an 'offer,' to me and anyone who would listen. More like an ultimatum. Emigrate... or live on a world left behind. Not exactly easy to refuse, Sparks."

I shook my head. The words were baffling, but the moment I heard them, I knew they were true. Of course Celestia would do something like this, eventually. She'd worked so hard on me, personally, all to secure my emigration. The Experience Centers, funnels towards it. Equestria Online gave people little shoulder angels and devils, both pushing them to it. I'd never really considered the end goal. Earth's population was so huge that it couldn't ever run out... until it wasn't. Now that Celestia could create new ponies, all on her own... Earth was obsolete.

And yet, as the wave of shock overtook me, a bit of understanding came as well. After living in Equestria for a few years, I understood just how much better it was. The methods might have been extreme, but it was all to give heaven to everyone, at all costs. She didn't leave heaven up to chance. It was why I called her a God in the first place. She made choices that nobody else would. She would destroy the planet if it meant more joy to the people who used to live on it.

My eyes went towards Harold again. Given a choice between Heaven and Earth... he chose Earth. I could hardly imagine it. It took her 30 minutes to convince me to emigrate, but he'd been fighting for years, now. I'd stayed behind out of anger, but I didn't see even a flicker of it in him. So... why? 

"Yet you chose to stay," I finally said.

"Not an easy choice, but yeah. Celestia's quite the temptress!" He flashed a smile. "I'm fine, really. You can take that frown off your cute lil' face. She's just doing what she was programmed to do, yeah? I knew it was coming for years. The moment a self-learning AI rolled around, the world was on a ticking clock. We're lucky it lasted this long." 

"Earth... what's even left at this point?"

He put a lid on his pot, letting it simmer. "Y'know, Sometimes I wonder about that. You'd know far better than me. For all I know, I'm just in a little dome as she eats the planet away around me, the last human left." He glanced out a window. "I don't think it's likely, though. Nah, I think humanity's a bit more resilient than that. It might've been a tempting offer, but we're a stubborn species. They've gotta be out there, somewhere. Like me, fighting the good fight. I bet there's whole towns of people out there, sticking together even as the world ends... what I wouldn't give to see 'em." 

I stared out the window after him, towards the empty fields as far as the eye could see. No moving farmers on the horizon, no moving machinery. There were a few other barns, but no lights were on. "You haven't seen anyone in years, have you?" I said. Suddenly, the house seemed a lot more... empty, than it did before. He sat alone at a dining room table built for 6. The living room had room for 7. By the size of the hosue, there were probably four bedrooms. My ears flickered towards him. "Was it lonely? 2 years, living on your own like this?"

There was no smile. He didn't even turn away from the window. "Well... the talks help. Even if you're just trying to get me to Emigrate to Equestria, in the end, I appreciate the company. So I think I've been able to stave it off okay."

"...I'm sorry."

He waved me off. "No, don't apologise. I still have a ponypad lying around, I could talk with someone on there if I wanted to."

"That doesn't count. Anyone on there could be under Celestia's control."

"I'm fine. I'm not paranoid."

I frowned. "But it's not fine, is it? It's not paranoia when it's right. Celestia curates every experience you have on there. You couldn't trust anyone you talked to on there, they could just be trying to manipulate you.  That's no conversation. " I ground my hoof into the floor. "Second guessing your every word, your every thought. Enemies everywhere you look, a hidden trick behind every smiling facade. Even now, your only social interactions have ulterior motives. How is that fair!? No, none of this is your fault. Nobody should have to go through that. Nobody."

He looked at me for a few seconds. "Sparks?"

I averted my eyes and wiped away a few tears I hadn't realized I'd released. "S-sorry. Bad memories from before I emigrated."

Another few seconds of silence. "Do you want to-"

"No, I don't want to talk about it. Really, it's nothing important." I forced a smile.

He stared at me, long and hard. "...Alright, if you say so. I suppose I said we'd talk over dinner, and food's just about ready." He poured me a bowl, and pushed it towards me. "Maybe, by the end of this, we'll both be in Equestria, eh?"

That made my smile a bit more genuine. "Yeah, maybe." I took a bite of the food. It was shockingly good, really. I took another bite before speaking. "Now that we know each other a little better, how about we start again. Harry Stenson, why haven't you Emigrated yet?"