I suddenly shot up from my bed, forcefully wide awake and disoriented as I was about to have another breakdown. Slowly looking around me... that was when I remembered the memories of the last two days, the realization hitting me like a mule. Through these past few nights, my sleep hasn’t been all too kind for me, with me being unable to remember anything of note from my dreams, if I even had a dream, and although it could be argued that I likely had a dreamless night, I was still completely on edge with whatever may enter my dreams. It wasn’t for any particular reason, but ever since this endeavor had started, I’ve always been on edge and it’s been hard to break that habit.
I looked around, still in the same room as always, but lately, the room I was in seemed to have lost its hue, it seemed to have become duller... this place now, unexpectedly to my surprise, brought a semblance of ease for me, it reminded me of the low and dully lit rooms of my old tower, and although I don’t know what has become of the tower I used to call home, I do still enjoy the fact that I haven’t had that many visitors as of late.
I’d have expected the nobility to try and talk me down by this point in time, but surprisingly, that hasn’t happened yet and it brought a bit of smugness to my ego, knowing that they would be hesitant to meet with me. I have no such qualms meeting such ponies or other creatures of similar stature, but I will critique that out of all the things that they could and should have done, they chose to avoid me, like a subject that a filly or colt might be hesitant to talk about with their parents.
Lamenting it, my mind drifted to other topics I would enjoy. Deep down, I thought of my situation as ironic, poetic even. My works, at least to the core of it all, would dictate that for a proper form of governance to improve both itself and its society, it should mitigate risks and only pursue endeavors if such things could be justified despite the possible repercussions and expenses... yet here I am, going out of my way and taking unnecessary risk in death to further give infamy to my work when I could have simply sat at the sidelines and let it slowly but surely grow.
I stayed in that lamenting state for a while, unable to do anything as my mind continued to return to better times, of better memories. But nothing could last forever, and soon, I had another visitor that came to visit my presence.
I Heard the obvious clinking and low thuds that a griffon’s hind paws and foreclaws made while they moved. I prepared myself for an uneventful and, most likely, violent interrogation. Instead of that, I am greeted by the sight of a blue griffon, motioning me to follow his lead and to go outside.
Hesitant at first, I realized I’d rather just comply with him than risk what is likely a forced beating to get me to follow, so following wherever this griffon will take me I did. Sneaking past what was sure to be double the force of guards that seemed to guard every entrance, exit, and hall to their posting, it was to the miracle of my surprise that we weren’t found out on the way, or at least, we didn’t face strong opposition, with how much of a sweet talker Gallus was and his seemingly outstanding rank as a guard.
...
“Here we are,” Gallus said as he came down for a landing, having carried my weight for who knows how long, I was impressed. More so of the view he chose, the early twilight view being a change from the sunsets most would see in life.
“So, what’s the occasion? Finally proposed to that Hippogriff ‘friend’ of yours?” I asked, pursuing small talk to open up this close guard of her highness.
I saw his face light up in a strong shade of crimson. His reaction is what I sought after with the remark, and I would react with a chuckle of my own, it would be more out of relief. The fact he was able to react with a strong emotion meant that he had a heart and mind despite the obvious “necessities” his line of duty entailed, something I might be overthinking but still nonetheless noticed.
“N-no, it’s not that,” He tried in vain to hide his flustered face. Unfortunately, it didn’t do him any good, it was just that obvious with how the contrast of his beat red emotions are to his fur. “It’s that I need to do something-”
I didn’t allow him to finish as my expression visibly took a turn for the worst. “Did they finally decide to kill me? Sending you to do their bidding? Were they impatient? Did they want it to be quick or slow?” I impatiently asked, awaiting his remark as I expected him to respond with a hitch.
“W-well… no, duh, I’d think it be obvious that I would have wanted more than just to kill you off, I’d be hunted down if I did so anyway... besides, Grandpa always told stories of a pony who could bring the wrath of gods and sway the minds of many with simple words and promises.” He said, looking at me eye-to-eye as we stared at each other. As intent as he may be, I saw courage and hesitation, mixed and held together by curiosity.
“We always thought he was in another one of his episodes, but now, seeing what the world wants to do with you, it reminded me of him, if only for what he spoke about,” he continued.
“Hmm... is that so?” Pondering about it, I thought a spark of my magic from my horn was what it would take for old memories to resurface. “Well, I can tell you this, the old geezer is, in more ways than one, a griffon who cared about your future… hehe. He knew what to oppose and what he was warned about, but was unable to properly show his love for a shattered nation, shame…”
Silence for a moment has persevered as I took the moment to appreciate the view I was allotted, waiting patiently for the griffin to catch up with his mind.
“So, you want to know more about the creature that the old griffon said? Or do you want to know the closest thing to it?” I saw his face and the response he was about to say, so I replied before he could speak. “So you do. Hmm, well, the closes I could give you is a story from my past, a lesson about... Um, what was it called? Um… Aha! Yes, I think it was something along the lines of ‘the Irony of Life’, do you know such a thing?”
“No?” I asked for him.
“Well, to tell you, it’s about the youthful energy and time, always wanting to take risks and make a mark, make something last while the risk we take also changes with us. We gamble upon it, but sooner or later, what was once the reason we gamble, the very thing that could bring success would be the very same thing that could bring it all crashing down. In the blink of an eye, riches could be earned and lost in an instant, and it is all because of the risks, how it favors not only the Bold but also the willing.”
“Wait... isn’t that just the ‘fortune favors the bold’ quote?” Gallus asked indicatively.
“Beats me, but what I’m saying is that there is always a toll for everything we do, be it time, reason, money... even blood. Remove this ring at my horn and I’d better visualize it for you,” I said.
And I saw the thinking mind of a griffon at play, a pose most griffons share when thinking over my proposals, weighing the options, and he took the risk, my word, and with a hesitant claw, removed the ring that made it difficult for me to cast magic.
As if new energy was being allowed a release, I did a spark and two with my horn, satisfied with being able to let loose. I looked at him, smiling as I cast the illusion spell I would use to better visualize it for him.
“Risk, rewards, everything… it’s like a... say, a snowball, it’s got to start from somewhere, usually small, but once we get rolling, you will soon realize that too much has been gained that turning back won’t be an option, a simple yet dangerous complex game that anyone could play...”
In a distant past...
The early morning here at what is essentially a barren wasteland was painful, but I continued, persevering through it. The scope I used to spot my targets laid there at my side, prepared and in position. Although today, I wasn’t particularly in a hunting mood, I was just here to “negotiate” some terms with a pony for publishing my book.
Soon, I spotted them nearing my position, with a griffon by their side, presumably there to guard them.
So, I prepared to make my daring move, I launched myself in their direction, knocking the pony down while I also launched a bolt of stun magic at the griffon, paralyzing the big creature in the middle of their conversation.
I pinned the pony, a mare earth pony, to the ground, trying my best not to lose the upper hand in this situation, considering her inherent earth pony strength. Once she was mostly secured, I now surveyed the area for any immediate threats, as I did so, I also looked over the griffon who seemed to have stiffened up, other than that, I was safe and secured for the moment.
Smirking at the job well done, I looked back to the grand prize of this little foalnapping of sorts.
Seeing her mouth open a bit, I instinctively wrapped a cloth around it to keep her from speaking or screaming, tying up her hooves as I levitated her and the paralyzed griffon back into my little camp in the outskirts, much to the strain of my magic and their begrudging muses.
‘Have a bit of decency,’ I repeatedly thought to myself throughout the journey back.
Once I would take refuge at my encampment, I would have a bit of rest, and later on, I would strike up a conversation with both, being pleasant to speak with, for the most part. I didn't notice it at first, which seems stupid in hindsight, but they were unnaturally calm about their situation.
...
later on...
“So wait, wait, you want us to print your books? Heck no, partner. I got other businesses that pay better than you run-of-the-mill scum.” Responded the southern mare to my questions, seemingly refusing to accept nor be convinced at my "clearly" fair proposal, which was increasingly taking a toll on my nerves.
“Yeah, what she said,” the griffon chimed in.
Breathing out a tired sigh, I didn’t want this to devolve into an unnecessary brawl, and I’d much rather not spill any blood...
So instead, I ignited my horn, levitating my saddlebag to their front, dropping it. As it hit the ground, it slumped over to reveal it was a bag full of bits and nothing more, immediately catching the eye of the griffon, while the mare tried to seem and act indifferent, but I saw through it.
“Will you print it and keep quiet about this encounter if I pay triple the amount? Equipment included.” I asked. Resorting to do anything just to get her on board this project, as I realized I'd have to giveaway to her demands to make her not only shut up but also go along with the plan.
“T-triple!?” she exclaimed as if in an exaggerated sequence, slumped to the ground before she eagerly inspect the bits before her while, ironically, the griffon stood by at attention, standing guard.
Several moments pass and soon, the mare launched herself back up, standing up tall and straight to reply to me. I also saw the hesitation of the griffon at the possible outcome.
“I’ll do it! But only if ya could beat big shot over here in a duel, first one to leave a mark on the other wins.” She responded, making her gamble final and true as she pointed a hoof towards the fairly bulky griffon.
Although not reflected by his outside appearance, I could tell he was hesitant.
“That’s if I win, so what if I lose?” I asked.
“If ya lose to big shot? Then ya owe the Pear family five figures!” she said expectedly, grinning all the while.
“Um... very well then,” I said, accepting the terms while reminiscing on the countless other similar times I had experienced this kind of sudden proposal or arrangement.
“I’ll take him up to the challenge...” I remarked, overlooking the fact that I was speaking to a pony who was probably a close associate of the pear family, probably an informant stationed at Appleoosa, however unlikely that story may be.
“Oh, ya won’t need anythin’ fancy n all, I just need ya both to hit em where it hurts! Don’t care about the specifics, ya just need to land a single hit on the other to knock em’ cold...”
...
So here I am, out in a clearing about to face a fairly large and intimidating griffon, he was armed with what seemed to be a well-maintained saber and was protected by what appeared to be strong armor, ready to fight against me. Meanwhile, on my side, I just stood there, horn alit at the ready to cast an age-old spell I knew, my cloak hiding the daggers that I had, which were strapped to my waist should I need them or just spice up my play a bit, something to pair with the spell’s I was about to cast.
“Are both of ya ready!?” the mare asked.
“Ready when he’s ready,” I said, standing tall, trying not to show fear as I pointed my horn.
“I’m ready as I’ll ever be!” The griffon bellowed, his intimidating nature played a part in my doubts.
But I suppressed those urges to run, I had confidence in myself. What I doubted was just how good the griffon was, with just how bulky he seemed.
“Then begin!” She announced.
The first move was his, and unexpectedly, he was unrelenting in his advances, dashing forward to strike me in one quick blow with a powerful thrust of his blade.
I tried to dodge the incoming attack by dashing to my left, fortunately, his blade wasn’t long enough and I managed to escape it, unscathed but most definitely surprised.
He was fast, terrifyingly so. This griffon, his movements, his blade choice, I had to keep my distance, but it was easier said than done. He did not give me any room to breathe, it felt choky, as if I was on a leash, constantly being pulled.
I was being pushed back, and there was little I could do against his advances, except just backing myself a bit for distance. Dash after dash, step after step. The spells I was supposed to cast were still dormant, but I didn’t have a clear and clean shot over him. What was supposed to be a quick and easy duel had turned into a well even outmatched fight between us both.
‘Shit,’ I thought to myself. ‘Should have shot the bastard earlier.’
The situation was degrading faster and faster, the pacing increasing as the first signs of weariness was coming. I had to do something, but there was no clear way out, not with the constant movement and limited room, if I shot now, I was sure that the blast radius from my spell would hit me, even if I hit the griffon, we were just too close to use such a spell to warrant my safety.
So either this duel would end in a draw or on a griffon victory, and unless I think of something quickly, I would have to settle for a draw.
And even then, a draw was hard to achieve, there was no guarantee that I could hit the griffon nor stay awake from my blast, and if I miss, it would leave me wide open for an attack, ensuring a griffon victory.
‘THINK, BOLD! THINK!’ I internally and desperately screamed to myself, trying to think of a way to bring a win for myself, internal screaming to the point of desperation.
That was, until the griffon gave a downwards thrust, hitting the dirt and flinging it in my direction. Of course, out of instinct, I closed my eyes, but not before I leaped upwards to avoid another potential strike.
This time, his move gave me a bit of inspiration, it was a gamble because I had to use this dormant spell before I could cast another spell. But if I was quick enough...
‘Yes, yes, that might just work.’ I thought to myself. Preparing another spell to go right after I discharge the first initial spell that I had built up, I landed back down and was again on the defensive, but before long, the griffon would try to do the same trick twice.
Once again, he gave a downward swing, but before he could do the same move and fling dirt onto my eyes, I pointed my horn at the ground where his blade was, and immediately, I discharged the spell that I had saved up to this point, sending a powerful bolt of magic that, upon impact, detonated into a big blast, the blast force being stronger than what I had initially anticipated.
The griffon had enough time to cover himself and allow his armor to take most of the blast, as for myself, the moment I discharged that spell, I immediately cast a shield bubble that launched me to the air thanks to the blast force created by the explosion.
‘I just did a blast jump.’ I thought to myself, smiling internally at this little moment.
Landing back on the ground, I quickly surveyed the surroundings, and I saw the griffon seemingly staggering and struggling to stand back up.
‘Geez, what a tough one.’ I had to admit, I was impressed by his resilience. I was sure that spell would have done the job.
Entering another stance, I slowly drew closer to the griffon as I prepared another spell to send into his direction, making sure that it would be able to incapacitate him for good.
Then, as the griffon regained his footing, he gazed over me and spoke. “You’re a good one, I would have never expected that from your size. Say, what’s your name?”
‘Name?’ I internally thought, quickly making a decision.
“Bold Ideals, and you?” I asked, never losing focus on the target set.
“Call me Gustav, a worker from the east.”
I saw him ready in a stance, I assumed he was about to charge forward, and so my horn was now directly tracking him.
“Well, it’s certainly a pleasure to meet you, Gustav. Although the same cannot be said for this duel’s outcome, for it will be in my favor!” I declared.
And just as he was about to open his beak to respond, that was when I made my move. Summoning a row of illusionary cannons through which I would fire my spell in his direction. And that is what I exactly did, internally being proud of my side works inspiring me. Without another moment of hesitation, I discharged the spell and a volley of (magical) cannon fire was shot in his direction. Around a dozen, shots were fired yet no amount of preparation could prepare me for this griffon’s next move.
And as if some god came down from the heavens just to insult my work, he started to dodge every single cannon shot as he dashed and made his way closer to me, as if he was renewed with vigor.
‘What the fuck?’ I thought to myself, dumbfounded at his agility. It was unnatural, at least for me, to see someone match me in skill and speed. It was reaching the point that surpassed being impressed, but I didn’t have time to worry about that, and again, I followed my initial strike with another one.
This time, I would be on the offensive, disallowing him the opportunity to strike me. With the ferocity that was comparable to his earlier attack, he was losing ground as he avoided my attacks, and the sensation of victory was dripping as if I could taste it as I approached it ever so close.
And, the final blow was to be made, I just had to prove I was the faster one, and with one final spell, I shot at him at a near point-blank range, but not before he seemingly threw a dagger as a last resort with his wings.
And in a sort of mellow-like manner, the griffon dropped to the ground, contorting out of pain from the blast I sent his way. For me, he was fortunately not the straight shot, and the dagger he threw missed me by mere inches, but my victory was, for all it was, a humbling experience. And so, I walked up to the fallen griffon, who stared on into my eyes, and I simply gave him a nod and smirk, which he returned, nothing more, nothing less.
Later on, arrangements were made after my fair victory and its terms. Through the years, the books I have written would go on to be fairly well-received books amongst those in the farther reaches of Equestria, having a fairly tame effect (in my opinion) as it spanned as far as the Hyppoghiph Kingdom and as close as the Griffon Kingdom, although never fully making its way back into the heart of Equestria. What became of my books, even I am not fully aware of, but I’d like to think it became the foundation for something greater than even the book itself.
‘SOUL’s: The Will that Influences Will’s,’
‘A Deviant Devine Philosophy,’
‘From The Crimson King’s Court,’
‘The Iscariot’s Will,’
‘Theory of Inevitability: A Book about Fate,’
‘The Cost of Innovation: The Forefront against Traditionalists,’
‘Within the Pilate’s Court: Between Conscience and Profession,’
‘Rules for Rulers: The Fundamentals of Ruling over a Society,’
‘And my ninth book, which just so happened to be my longest book,’
‘Between Those Whose of Sovereignty and Power: The Banner of All Rulership’s.’
Just some of the many books under my name, some were formed from inspiration, and others would now serve to inspire. No doubt each gaining infamy or fame from such an unknown author, much to both my annoyance and partial relief. Still, these nine books are, what I didn’t realize then, the books that would propel my name and allow me to become the change I would dream to be.
To have them simply be infamous is heartbreaking to some extent, but knowing that its infamy is somewhat justified and counterbalanced by the small things of fame, I can at least be comforted by the fact that this world wasn’t full of idiots who blindly listened and follow.
It was, to me, a truly long ride, over many decades and planning, so many sleepless nights spent writing and researching. Just to amount to a single moment in life, change is truly about to come our way.
Back at the present...
“On that very day, the duel I faced was more of a dance than anything else, elegant in most aspects, not even words could fully give justice to just how exhilarating the whole experience was!” I exclaimed, reminiscing on that memory, the thrill, the excitement, the enticement of each movement, all expertly done with the purpose to build onto a goal. “Although now that I think about it, your old pops likely heard the stories from Gustav, since he and I shared a history with the publications of my books, amongst other things.”
Rarely do we meet an opponent that could not only match our skill on the same level and tenacity, but in the rare and, unusually, in-between moments that we do meet, they show us what the true meaning of equality is with no ulterior motives, a thrill, and honor that, although rare, could last a lifetime of reflection.
A fair play that makes one think and appreciate it, a goal that is both humbling and empowering to both parties.
A goal that the griffon and I shared and one that allowed us both to pour our hearts out to the fullest. Although a dance with death isn’t the only form of risk one could take, sometimes, it is with the harshness of life that we could also experience a similar feeling of uncertainty, unexpectedness, or apprehension. Deep respect was formed between both of us from just this single duel.
“So, is that all you’re going to tell me? Just a story about you fighting a griffon?” Gallus asked. Having sat at my side by the cliff edge, admiring the view that was provided by the outside while listening to me.
I hesitated but knew I had to explain it to him, if I didn’t, it would sound too simple to the point of fleetingness, I wanted the idea to stick with him.
“It wasn’t just about opportunity, it was also about something greater... to work for the future. I had many times in my life, placed it on the line for my earlier books to be printed and published, and should I have lost that encounter, my reputation, and likely opportunities, would have sunk deeper than the regrets of even Celestia herself.”
“Really? So, tell me more, I heard many things from Spike, and I’d like to get to know you more.”
“Hmm,” I thought over it, I did not doubt that I was about to do something important, a turning point for later, so I guess… I guess it’s the least I could do for the griffon.
“Ok fine, but I’m going to tell you this now, Gallus, you’re still young, and you still have a life to live. Life could be defined in many different ways, but life could only be lived once, my life was likely defined by my works as a unicorn and writer, but I lived my life with risks... it was enjoyable... I was able to make the most out of it.”
My expression shifted ever so slightly as I continued. “And that’s the reason why I’m not the young pony I once was, I can’t just take risks, I have gained too much to risk away, unlike you…”
The least I could do for him was explain, and hope he understood. That’s what I did before, and I hope it would work again. I’d buy myself some time, I was free from the confines of that forsaken palace room, now is my chance to get back out there, into the open world.
...
I have made my decision, and I am sure that it’s a risk not even my most bashful self would take, I was about to do something so redundant. And from what I’ve learned, regret always comes after the deed, so no regrets, for now.
“Most creatures say that life is about the journey and not the destination, without even understanding what that means! It, its... It’s Disgraceful! Disgusting! Despicable! And deplorable!” I say, now catching up to the things I was saying.
“To live is to experience youth and the eventual coming of age, to live would be to eventually die. That is the cycle, the irony, of life, to taste life only for death to wait at your side, you may not notice it, but it’s always there. So at the core of it all, risk sits at the throne of what keeps us young, to dare what sits waiting for us in the paved road that we call living...”
“Today, I will admit, has been pleasant, especially with a youngster like you,” I said, finally allowing a single drop of tear to flow.
I saw his reaction, one of confusion, no doubt thinking I’m being overly dramatic. “What do you mean?” Gallus asked, his naive attitude griping my heart for what I was about to do.
“You know, having lived an unorthodox life, pared with a time that was... bizarre, I guess what I’m trying to say is don’t make your life stale. So don’t take what I’m about to do personally.” I said, lighting up my horn in the process of it all.
“Wait… DON-” I heard him try to call out to me, but by then, I was already out. Having cast my teleportation spell, it was a pain to even try and conceive in the first place, but in the end, I managed to pull it off.
The next thing I knew, I was in a forest-like place, with thick forestry surrounding me all around. With nothing more than my magic to accompany me now, I was on the run, for how long, I am unsure.
‘Was this all fated?’ I silently asked. Pondering upon the decisions I made to get to this point. ‘Was it even worth it? Isn’t it sealed that my death is inevitable... So why?’
Unfortunately, I couldn’t ponder on it any longer, it was one thing to escape authority, and it is another to remain out of their reach. So, I began my trek, one that would get me far but not far enough.
The consequences of my escape had far reaches, such as public support for me plummeting after my stunt and my fate with death being all but assured thanks to it, with many more unforeseen consequences flying over my mind at the heat of this moment.
Never realizing the river flow of tears that came out as a result. Even the instinctual need to escape was gone, the entire reason why I even decided to make this getaway, a daring escape, but the deed is done. It’s just that... I can’t feel the risk, it isn’t there, maybe it’s because I know that deep down, I’ll be caught eventually. It’s only a matter of when and if it’s ceremonious or not.
Still, I persevered and moved on, I tried to tell myself it wasn’t anything personal, but it could be hard to realize that fact.
In the final stretch of my life, I was on a ticking clock with each passing moment... The only thing I could find solace in is the fact that I’d get a proper dreamless night, without the intervention of the crown, at least until I get caught again.