//------------------------------// // Chapter 233 - The Cider River // Story: Dadonequus Discord (Book 2) // by CrazedLaughter //------------------------------// “Come on!” Rainbow Dash bellowed as she gestured her hooves upwards. “Fluttershy, are you going to tell me it isn’t funny? Discord is right there! Anon is right here! Everypony is fine!” Fluttershy just kept her hardened stare on her, never wavering. “That’s not the point, Rainbow Dash. You’re supposed to be the element of loyalty, and a professor who follows their values. What do you think the others would say if they heard you talking like that?” Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes at her. “Are you serious? We always have a big laugh about a bunch of stupid stuff we do.” “Yes, together, as in all of us. It isn’t right when we’re making fun of one another.” Fluttershy retorted. “I mean, I get that. But Twilight has to be already there, and Celestia has to be all like...” Rainbow Dash threw her mane back, and flapped her wings to make it look like it flowed like Celestia’s. “Twilight, oh, I was in danger? Ah, right, this cake was below par to what I am used to. If you hadn't stopped me, I might've gotten sick!” Rainbow Dash then burst into laughter. “Come on, isn’t that hilarious? Twilight will be all like this!” Rainbow Dash limped slightly backwards as she let her eyes bug out. Fluttershy was not amused, she just crossed her forelegs, and silently stared at her. “Wow… Seriously? Come on, you’re only being so hard on me because you probably don’t want Anon to think this is bad or something.” Rainbow Dash said, awaiting an answer. And when she didn’t get it, she immediately pointed at Discord. “What about him?! He was the one who asked me the question! He started all this!” Discord didn’t even wince, he just frowned as he looked towards Fluttershy, and bowed. “Indeed, I did start all this, and I simply must apologize. You see, when I stated my argument towards you, I had expected that bringing Rainbow Dash here would lead to the demise of my point. In other words, I expected her to disagree with me, therefore making me wrong, and you right. In that way, I believe it would have cemented the lesson in Anon’s head. Truly, this was my fault.” “See! He admits it!” Rainbow Dash said, as she doubled her pointing at him. “Plus, he’s probably lying about wanting me to not agree with him and stuff. He’s Discord, he likes being right, like, all the time!” Y’know, somehow, you actually believed Discord on this one. One of his defining traits was trying not to upset Fluttershy, even if he ends up doing that anyway. In this case, you were sure he knew simply arguing with her on the matter of your upbringing may upset her. Then again, you could be wrong and he’s just trying to save face. Either way, you were enjoying the boat ride, and you didn’t want it to end miserably for anyone. Well, anyone who was ‘family’. “I actually believe Dad. Dad hates upsetting Aunt Fluttershy, like, by a whole lot. And believe it or not, Dad does try to teach me to be good sometimes, and to use my chaos responsibly. I know, I know, Dad can also just do what he wants and it kinda looks really bad. Okay, it goes really bad, because… Well, I did bad. But when it comes to wanting to make Aunt Fluttershy happy, I just don’t think he’d just blatantly upset her with that kind of an argument. And I definitely learned my lesson, making fun of Twilight like that is pretty bad.” “Blatantly? Is that even a wo-Wait! You believe him?! Seriously?! Fluttershy, what about you?” Rainbow Dash just stared at her, just waiting to see what she had to say. Fluttershy nodded, but she began to soften up a little, if only because she seemed pleased by your words. “I believe Discord too. I know he understands how important it is to be a good father, he just forgets sometimes.” Fluttershy said, her hope, even when strained, never falling apart. “Guh! Geh! Mahg! Mmm!” Rainbow Dash began to recoil and flinch constantly, until she floated down onto the boat, and just stared for a good long moment before letting out a tired sigh. “Okay… Fine, I was in the wrong. Sheesh, I wasn’t expecting Discord to just… I dunno, do that? That thing where he thought I’d disagree with him?” Discord grabbed onto Rainbow Dash and hugged her hard and close to his side. “That’s the power of family!” He said with a jovial laugh as he grabbed a hayburger and stuffed it into Rainbow Dash’s mouth. “Here! This is supposed to be a joyous yet relaxing little boat ride, so have a burger on the house!” “FASDFDSFG… Mfngnm…. Mmm.” Rainbow Dash, at first, seemed like she was choking; But as she chewed, she actually found herself actually enjoying the hayburger. “Okay, this isdb gwood.” She garbled as she chewed, then swallowed. “Yeah, okay, I get it. Hey, Fluttershy, you’re not mad at me, are ya?” Fluttershy shook her head, and gave her friend a warm smile. “No, as long as you learned your lesson.” “Yeah, I guess I did.” Rainbow Dash said with a light hearted chuckle before looking at you. “Hey, so, Anon. Uh, um, well… You alright? I mean, I heard what happened. Was it really that serious?” You took a moment to compose yourself, the thought still hurts. “Yeah… It was, but… I, heh, I don’t really want to think about it too much right now. I want to move past it, and better myself.” “It’s like that, huh? Hmmm.” Rainbow Dash began to ponder there for a moment, actually doing her best to think of something motivating. “Well… Just stay the course, that’s something Twilight would say, I guess. You ain’t a bad colt, you just gotta chill, relax, and just do what’s right. Hey, you can be more like me, if you want! I always do the right thing. Except for that last thing, that doesn’t count.” “U-um!” Fluttershy’s body jerked listening to that as her expression twisted. She knew that Rainbow Dash was exaggerating again, and aimed to correct that. “But, Anon! Also remember to be like the other elements too! Loyalty, Kindness, Laughter, Honesty, Generosity...” “And magic, chaos magic to be exact. I’m fully on your side on this, Fluttershy, but chaos is in his very core.  He can be all those things, of course, but with just the right twist of chaos.” Discord added. Fluttershy nodded with a light giggle. “Of course, as long as he’s responsible with it.” Rainbow Dash was just staring, her eyes narrowing. “Okay, what’s going on here?  You guys are acting all togethery all of a sudden. Like, really togethery.” Discord’s attention immediately fell back on Rainbow Dash as he furrowed his brow towards her. “Don’t you have some sort of Blunderbolt thing to get to?” “That’s Wonderbolts, Discord! Why do you al-” But before Rainbow Dash could say anything else, Discord snapped her away. Discord then leaned back, and let out a heavy groan. “Oh Celestia, I’m glad I didn’t hesitate. She always goes on and on about how I need to respect the… Er… Hm, I don’t even remember the name anymore. Ah well.” Fluttershy stifled a giggle, and gently scolded Discord in good nature. “Discord, you really should be nicer about it. Remember, you have to be more responsible.” “Well… Alright, alright, I know. Wonderbolts, the amazing patrollers of the skies… Or something like that. That’s close enough, right?” Discord asked. “Yes, but be sure to let Rainbow Dash know you’re sorry too when you get the chance.” Fluttershy said. “If I must.” Discord said with a shrug before looking over to you. “So, Anon, we have a boat, we have ambiance, relaxing music. Is there anything we’re missing?” Oh, hey, he was asking you? Well then, alright, what could you add then? “Missing? Um, well, how about dessert? How about…” You began to look around, then peered over the boat and stared into the water. “Hmm, how about something to wash it down, chaos style?” “Ah, now that’s something I can do!” Discord said as he cocked his tail like a shotgun, waved it in front of himself, then grabbed it to aim like a rifle. “Take that! And this!” He began to fire transforming magic bullets, shooting large chocolate pudding cups into yours and Fluttershy’s hooves. He then pulled out what looked like a spinning top, in which he pulled the string, and tossed it like a grenade. “Cider in the hole!” He cried out as the spinning top fell into the water, spinning, causing a swirl of apple cider to spread through the river. “Drinks on!” Discord said as he slid empty beer steins towards you and Fluttershy, sliding them through the air like they were on some sort of table. Fluttershy, somehow knowing it was safe to let go of the pudding cup as it floated in mid-air after she let it go, easily caught the beer stein “Oh, Discord, you always know how to throw in amazing flair to everything you do. But, um…” Fluttershy looked into the river “Is the cider safe for Anon to drink? And are all the fishies going to be okay?” “Trust me, Fluttershy, this is a full family affair with family appropriate snacking. As for the ‘fishies’, they will be alright, I moved them all ahead, so no worries.” Discord said as he squeezed his pudding cup, an endless stream of chocolate going down his mouth as he filled his beer stein with cider from the river. Huh, an endless pudding cup. Not exactly what you had in mind, but hey, it’s pudding, and it’s endless, soooo, “Bottoms up!” You dip your snout into the cup and just start licking hungrily, until you notice something. It didn’t taste that sweet. “Hey, what gives? Where’s the sugar?” “Sugar free, I’m afraid. As a responsible parent, I can’t allow your teeth to rot. Same with you, Fluttershy, I hope you don’t mind.” Discord said, stifling a slight snicker. “Oh no, not at all. But, Anon, it doesn’t taste good to you? I actually think it tastes very good. Why don’t you give it another try, and not think about the sugar, but the chocolatey goodness instead.” Fluttershy suggested. Mnnn, well… Despite Discord patronizing you a little, she was right, it was still pretty good, and the chocolate tasted pretty pure. You licked it again, and again, and more, and much more. Fine, the pudding was still pretty good. But what about the cider? You look at your beer stein, shrug, then toss it aside as you bent over the boat and sunk your face into the cider river and began to suck it down. Fluttershy gasped at first, but as you pulled yourself up and licked at your own muzzle, you had to admit, it was some damned good appley goodness. And it tasted pretty sweet. “Wow! This is really good!” “Haha! Now that’s how you do it!” Discord, loving your display, just tossed his own beer stein aside as he bent himself backwards, diving his head into the river, then raising it back up while his head was encased in a cidery bubble. He just put a straw in his mouth and sucked until the bubble was all sucked in. “Now, how was that?” “That was awesome! Hey, Aunt Fluttershy, why don’t you give it a go?” Man, this was getting to be pretty sweet. You just wanted to see her loosen up and try it herself. “C’mon!” “I-I dunno, I don’t think I can do it as well as you two.” Fluttershy said, rather nervously. “Nonsense! Just loosen up a little, Fluttershy. You of all ponies know there is nothing wrong with giving in to a little chaos.” Discord said, quite intrigued himself to see if Fluttershy could pull it off. “Well, I know… But… Um…” Fluttershy, after all that bravado with Rainbow Dash, just suddenly became so timid again. “Aunt Fluttershy… Aunt Fluttershy… Aunt Fluttershy. Aunt Fluttershy! Aunt Fluttershy!” You began to chant. You chanted more and more, until finally, Discord, seeing your encouragement, decided to join in. Both of you are chanting for her, trying to fill her with courage and awesomeness. “Okay! O-okay! Wow, you two really think I can do it… Well, okay. I’ll, um, I’ll give it a try. Let’s see…” Fluttershy gently tossed her beer stein aside, then she stared into the cider itself rather intently until suddenly, she began to stand and spread her wings. She closed her eyes, took a breath, and then suddenly, she back flipped into the river. Wait, she just back flipped into cider! “GYAH! HOLY SHIT! SHE JUST FLIPPED RIGHT INTO IT! DISCORD! CAN YOU EVEN SWIM IN THIS?!” You yelled as you ran over to where Fluttershy was, trying to look deeper into the sudsy yellow liquid. Discord also went into a panic, and rushed up towards you. “I don’t know! I don’t know if anypony can properly swim in a cider river or not! Why would I even know that?!” He then slammed his head into the river and yelled out a bubbly “FLUTTERSHY!” Shit! You weren’t expecting that! And, well, wait. Why were you worried? No, Anon, geez! Calm down! It’s pretty obvious Fluttershy is fine, and she’s going to appear on the other side of the boat. “Geez, what am I even worried about? Hey, Aunt Flutter-” But when you turned around to see if she popped up on the other side, she wasn’t there. “OH SHIT!” You then grabbed Discord’s fur on his back and pulled his head out of the river. “Discord! You gotta do something! Bring her back on the boat!” “Right! I can do that! I have that power! Alright, stand back, Anon! With the mighty snap of my talons, let Flutt-Hm?” He snapped, but nothing happened. “I said, with the mighty snap of my talons! Let Fluttershy- What?! Come on!” He began to snap rapidly, but nothing was working. “Discord! Stop playing around! This is serious!” You said, shaking him the best you could. “I’m not! Something is deflecting my magic! I don’t even know how that’s possible! It’s almost like some other chaotic force is blocking my power!” Discord yelled as he began snapping everything he had, even having his horns tap together. You began to hyperventilate. Why?! Why did you have to goad her on?! What could even be blocking Discord’s powers?! Unless… Unless… You began to tremor and grow pale. Your eyes began to become unsteady as thoughts of the staff began to fill your head. But who was using it? Why? And why drown Fluttershy?! “No! NO! Oh god, no! Discord… She’s going to drown. She’s going to drown and it's all my fault. Oh god…” You began to tear up, you started to shake. “I-I know, to think… Wait, drown? Why would she drown?” Discord asked, suddenly confused more than anything else. “What do you mean ‘why would she drown’? She hasn’t come back up… She-She’s…” You said, gulping hard, your vision blurring with tears. “Anon…” Discord groaned as he face palmed himself with his paw. “She’s not going to drown, is this what this was all about?” “N-ngh, w-what do you mean by that?! Don’t you care?! She hasn’t come back up yet! Sh… Wait…” Your eyes narrowed towards Discord when the realization suddenly hit you. “You can breathe in the river now, can’t you?” “Well, duh! After your little stunt, I had to make sure the river was safe for all of us. Drown?!” Discord suddenly became angry with you, crossing his arms. “What do you take me for, a moron? I would have dove in after her myself if that was what was going on.” Your eye twitched, and you blew up at him, angry. “Are you serious?! ARE YOU SERIOUS?! WHAT THE HELL DID YOU THINK I WAS SCREAMING ABOUT THAT WHOLE TIME?! WHY DID YOU GET SO SCARED?!” Discord got up to your face, and pointed right at you. “Because I thought she was going to get cramps, Anon! Did that not cross your mind?! Can you imagine Fluttershy writhing in pain as she finally got back to the boat, her body plagued with muscle spasms?! That is truly a terrible thought! Even worse, I can’t bring her back onto the boat! Do you know what that means?!” Your anger subsided into dread, and you started to look around, for some sort of sign. “Discord… I know, I know what it means. The staff, somepony has it, and is using it right now to block your magic.” “What?” Discord said, utterly confused. “The staff! What other chaotic force could deflect your magic? Discord, I think we’re in trouble! We have to go in and get Fluttershy.” You said, as you prepared yourself to just dive in and go get her. If she was able to breathe in the river, then maybe it was possible to swim in it too, you had to try to get her. Discord just shook his head, not saying a word, and picked you up by your sides. He then sat you down, waved his talon at you, and sighed. “Okay, alright, I see the issue here. Anon, you really need to get your mind off that silly old thing. I can assure you it isn’t the staff.” “Well, you don’t seem very sure about it! If it isn’t the staff, then what can it be?! Why are you suddenly so calm?!” Dammit! What was going on with him! “Oh, why? Well, it’s because I realized what’s blocking my magic. It’s that top I used, it must still be spinning. Hard to aim my shots with that thing zipping around in the cider.” Discord explained. Wut?! “Then… Then what about Fluttershy?” You asked, your nerves shot, your eyes bloodshot and mane frazzled. “See, I was worried about that too. But then I remembered something else.” Discord said, as he began to gently rub his paw on your head. “W-what’s that?” You asked. Discord shrugged “You don’t remember? Fluttershy is a Buckball champion. I don’t wish to cause any fuss during her live performances, so I always have to catch them later through the lens of my chaotic eyes. In other words, why are we worrying about drownings and cramps when she's in tip top condition?” “Because she hasn’t come out of the cider yet.” You just told him, rather bluntly. “Oh, yes… OH NO! WHAT IF SHE SOMEHOW DID DROWN IN DROWNLESS CIDER?! WHAT IF SHE HELD HER BREATH FOR TOO LONG!? FOR NO REASON WHATSOEVER!” Discord said as he grabbed you and shook you as hard as he could as he began to panic. “WHAT IF HER ENTIRE BODY CRAMPED AND SHE’S AT THE BOTTOM OF THE RIVER, SCREAMING FOR HELP!? ANON! YOU FOOL! WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME THESE THINGS BEFORE?!” “ASFASDFSDFSDFSF” Was the only answer you could give as your vision blurred and stomach churned. “Anon! Anon! I-I can’t handle this! I actually feel those feelings! Those true feelings bursting out of my heart! Painfully! Making me realize that I l-” But before Discord, in his delirious ramblings, could finish, there was a sudden burst from the side of the boat as a twister of cider began to rise above the river like a tornado. Suddenly, within the center, you could see a yellow and pink figure spinning. When it reached the peak of the tornado, there was a sudden burst as the yellow and pink figure began to spin, and spin, and spin, until the cider exploded all around her and the tornado dissipated as Fluttershy appeared above, the spinning top caught in her tail as she spins one more time and hurls the thing expertly back onto the river, causing it to skip along the cider endlessly into the horizon.  Fluttershy, drenched in cider, slowly flew back onto the boat, and began to squeeze her mane and tail to get the cider out. “Oh my, I-I think that was a little more spectacular than what I was going for. I-I hope you both don’t feel like I was trying too hard. I-I just wanted to try something new and exciting, and thought I could use that top for something, erm, cool? Erm, did any of you think that was ‘cool’?” Discord immediately calmed down, looked over at you, and chuckled. “I told you she was an athlete.” He said, before melting and becoming unconscious. “Discord?! Anon, what happened to your father?” Fluttershy asked, rather worried, “Um, I think it was something like this.” Your mind could no longer take it. The thought of losing Fluttershy was so much that it made your mind just… skip. So with that, you just fell over, and passed out. “O-oh, dear… Maybe it really was too much.” Fluttershy commented to herself.