//------------------------------// // Twilight was yellow instead of purple? // Story: What If... // by TheMajorTechie //------------------------------// Twinana stepped out of the banana factory. She was a brand-new banana pone, and she was going to do big banana pone things. She knocked on the door of Spike the Dragon, the resident dragon librarian of Ponyville. "Henlo! Am Twinana! I come in?" There was a surprised mumble, followed by what could only be assumed to be roughly a shelf's worth of books all falling at once. Twinana kicked down the door with her banana powers before Spike could open it. "I come in! Much books! Very knowledge! Will learn to be good pone!" Spike scratched his head as he watched the absurdly yellow unicorn waddle past him into the maze of shelves. "Hello? Twinana?" Spike wandered through the aisles, calling the mare's name. "You've been in here for a week now! Are you alright? I know there's vending machines and water fountains and such, but you really should come out at some point!" "TWINANA ALL POWERFUL." Twinana materialized atop one of the shelves beside the dragon. "TWINANA LEARN THE MAGICKS. WILL GO BECOME STUDENT NOW." "I, uh--" Spike raised a claw, but Twinana was already gone. "CELESTIA!" Twinana kicked down the door of Canterlot Castle. Unfortunately, the door was blown off its hinges with such force that the pony that Celestia was currently having tea with while discussing official matters had vanished without a trace. "HOLY FRICK." Celestia looked up from her tea. "I YOUR STUDENT NOW." Twinana nuzzled herself up beneath Celestia's wing. "WILL BE GOOD STUDENT NOT LIKE SUNSET SHIMMER." Celestia shrugged and continued sipping her tea. "NIGHTMARE MOOOOOOOOOON!" Twinana yelled, pointing her horn at Nightmare Moon. Behind her stood her new friends. Applejack looked very mildly disturbed, but that wasn't important. "YOU REIGN OF TERROR END NOW!" Nightmare Moon screeched as the rainbow laser from the Elements of Harmony enveloped her. As the light faded, all that remained was a very yellow Princess Luna. Faraway, Celestia grinned wider than she'd ever grinned before. "DISCOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORD!" Twinana sang with all her heart. You know the rest of the song. Discord decided that it was so beautiful that he stopped trying to torment everypony and turned himself back into stone. "KWEEN CRISPALISTH!" Twinana yellowed, standing between Princess Cadance and Queen Chrysalis. "NO TOUCH PRINCESS OR BROTHER." Shining Armor scratched his head. When did he have a sister? Queen Chrysalis cackled loudly before being turned into a potato chip. "MISTER SOMBRERO." Twinana slapped King Sombra across the face with Spike, who deeply regretted tagging along. "OWNING PONIES BAD. YOU GO TO FOREVER TIME-OUT BOX." That was, of course, Spike's queue to whip out his flamethrower. By the time he was done, all that remained was slag from Sombra's armor. "DISCOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOORD!" Twinana sang again. This time it was so beautiful that Discord fell in love with Fluttershy I think. "I SMITE THEE, FOUL DEMON!" Twinana boomed with her godlike voice as she hovered above Sunset Shimmer. "RAINBOW, PLAY DOOM MUSIC!" Sunset Shimmer was promptly smited by more rainbow friendship lasers and was un-demonified. The demon turned into a banana. "BAD WEIRD MAN BULL THING!" Twinana screeched, swooping down over Tirek. "YOU DESTROY SPIKE LIBRARY. HE IS MAD." "Bah! So what if he's upset?" Tirek laughed, attempting to drain Twinana of her banana magic. Unfortunately it turns out he was allergic to bananas so instead he died. "FISH LADIES, HAVE YOU EVER HAD FISH TACOS?" Twinana sang at the Dazzlings. Sonata, with her obsession with tacos, gasped and ran off-stage to Taco Bell while the other two Dazzlings depowered now that there weren't three of them. "OKAY RAINBOW FRIENDSHIP LASER NOW." Twinana passed the microphone to Sunset Shimmer, who smited the other two with a rainbow friendship laser that was very much bacon scented. "WHY YOU TAKE CUTIE MARK?!" Twinana repeatedly slapped Starlight across the face. "TAKE CUTIE MARK IS MEAN. WHY YOU DO IT?" Starlight coughed in between slaps. "B-because... m-my friend moved away for school." But Twinana didn't hear that because she was busy slapping Starlight. She then threw Starlight off the side of a cliff and gave everypony back their cutie marks. Strangely, everypony from that town now has banana-related cutie marks, so I guess they were all part of one big banana farming town or something. "YOU AGAIN." Twnana lunged at Starlight and began slapping her across the face with banana peels again as they fell into a time travel portal. "WHY YOU BREAK TIME? GIVE TIME BACK AND FIX." One of her slaps conveniently blocked Starlight's attempts to launch an anti-aircraft missile at a filly Rainbow Dash, thus allowing the Sonic Rainboom to happen and saving all of Equestria. After a few more hours of slapping Starlight finally decided that maybe it was better to be a good pone so that she doesn't get slapped by banana peels. "IT MEEEEEE!" Twinana pressed her face up against her human counterpart's ankle. "IT REALLY ME FOR REALLLLLL!" Human Twinana cringed and took a step back. "ISSA BABYYYYYY!" Twinana cooed at Flurry Heart. Her natural banana fragrance calmed the alicorn filly enough that she didn't accidentally shatter the Crystal Heart. "POTATO CHIP QUEEN." Twinana kicked down the door to the throne room of the long-since potato chip-ified Queen Chrysalis. "YOU HAVE NEW KING NOW I THINK THAT MEAN YOU HAVE NEW HUSBANDO." "No. Ew." Queen Chrysalis noped out of there, leaving the new King Thorax to take over. "LOOK AT ME I DO THE LIMBO!" Twinana bent over underneath the bar. This was also conveniently the freeing ritual to unlock the Pillars of Equestria DLC, which unfortunately had a weird glitchy thing called the Pony of Shadows in it as well. "OH NO RAINBOW TIME." Twinana got together with her friends and instantly blasted the Pony of Shadows into oblivion, leaving a very confused (and yellow) Stygian behind. "GRUBBER IS A SIIIIIIIIIMP!" Twinana yelled through her megaphone as she pointed a hoof at Grubber. "GRUBBER SUBSCRIBE TO STORM KING ONLYFLAMS TOP-TIER PATREON AND HAVE STORM KING SHRINE IN BEDROOM!" The Storm King choked on his coconut water as news of his biggest fan reached his ears. The choking made him accidentally swerve his airship into the other side of Mount Canterhorn, causing it to explode. "I LEARN FROM BOOK SO NOW YOU CAN TOO!" Twinana stood before the ribbon at the grand-opening of her new School of Friendship. "IT VERY VERY EASY! GET LOST IN BOOK FOR ONE WEEK AND BECOME ONE WITH BOOK!" Everyone clapped while awkwardly chuckling. "OH NO SMALL ANGRY CHILD!" Twinana drop-kicked Cozy Glow out the window into the conveniently placed bottomless pit straight into Tartarus beside the school. "BAD GOAT MAN THAT IS ACTUALLY CLOSE FRIEND." Twinana slapped Discord across the face with the biggest banana peel anyone had ever seen. "WHY YOU DO DIS?" "Ow. Geez. Oof." Discord deadpanned. "Fine, it was just a prank bro." Queen Potato Chip, zombie Tirek and Cozy Glow were then publicly stoned and now they are stoned forever I think. "LUSTER GRAPE." Twinana yeeted Luster Dawn into the horizon. "YOU GO SOLVE ALL PROBLEM NOW I FEEL LAZY." And so she did but badly and that's how Equestria crumbled. The end.