//------------------------------// // Epilogue // Story: The Twilight-Zephyr Letters // by Tunneling Carp //------------------------------// “You wanted to see me, princess?” Princess Twilight Sparkle looked up from the missive she had been studying to see Discord, the self-proclaimed Lord of Chaos, step out from one of his signature cracks in reality.  She was relieved to see his appearance was relatively normal: no shower caps, no smoking jackets; nothing to indicate he was put out by her summons.  Good; this confrontation would be tricky enough without him feigning irritation. “Yes, Discord.  Thank you for coming.  Would you like some tea?”  she asked him politely as she levitated a teapot over to the table separating them. “Thank you, Twilight, but I brought my own.”  As he said this, he reached back through the crack and retrieved a large cross-shaped object filled with a steaming liquid.  He upended the T and drank down its contents before tossing it aside with a subdued crash.  “Ah, T.  Truly the tastiest letter!” He snapped his claw and the crack in reality collapsed into nothingness.  “Now, what warrants this summons, my dear Twilight?” Twilight kept her expression neutral as she addressed the draconequus.  “I’m simply interested in your take on that uprising in the east.” “Ah, yes, the Second Eastern Rebellion?  Nasty bit of business, that was.” he said, shaking his head.  He placed a thick pair of glasses on his eyes; his lecturing mode.  “Imagine, prejudice against a creature simply because they weren’t born a pony?  Certainly, I could understand dislike of one of those sphinxes, with their riddles and ridiculous headdresses and whatnot, but to include a draconequus in that list?  Shameful, that’s what it is.” “I’m glad you agree.”  Twilight gave a quick nod, but immediately retook her serious demeanor.  “But I was wondering if you knew anything about where the Zephyrites ended up.  Warm Zephyr said they sailed east, but that would have put them in Griffonstone by now!” “Yes, quite strange,” Discord replied, stroking his beard thoughtfully.  “It’s almost as if they really did have goddesses helping them on their way to Lunestia!” “Lunestia?” Discord took on his most innocent look, the kind Twilight was all too familiar with.  “Well, if I were the leader of a schism based on the worship of our two former princesses, I'd certainly want to name our new homeland in their honor!” “Still, Discord, that seems awfully specific.  Are you certain you don’t know anything about where they ended up?” “Why, Twilight, are you accusing me of exerting my considerable influence on the Zephyrites?”  He paused, waiting for a reply, but when none was forthcoming, he continued indignantly: “I certainly have much more productive things to do than manipulate a group of impressionable ponies!  I would never debase myself in such a way!” “I wouldn’t say manipulating an entire group.  I just find it interesting that Warm Zephyr seemed so convinced she had seen Celestia and Luna in that cave.” “Ah, but there’s the rub, dear Twilight.”  Discord snapped his claws again and materialized a motorized brush in his right paw.  He began absently shining his tail as he continued: “You see, I’ve never taken the form of two creatures before!  Certainly I’d be able to if I wished, but that would be cheating!” “Discord, there are very few creatures who knew of the cave’s existence, much less where it might be located.  And I’m discounting the idea that it really was Celestia and Luna in there.”  Twilight leaned forward in her chair, accusingly.  “That leaves you as the lead suspect.” “Twilight, I’m hurt!”  The brush disappeared in a flash as Discord created a striped prison uniform on his chest, with a barred window floating before him.  “I thought we were past this!  Just because I possess unimaginable powers doesn’t mean every unexplainable event is my fault!” “It’s not that at all, Discord,” Twilight smiled sweetly.  Discord relaxed, dematerializing the prison uniform.  But then Twilight’s face grew hard again.  “It’s because your partner confessed to me.  I’m sure you remember Zorapter?”  Twilight lifted a photograph of a guilty-looking changeling for Discord to see.  “Do you have anything to say about that?” she demanded. “I suppose that rules her out as the next Element of Loyalty…” Discord muttered. “Discord!  This is serious!”  Twilight shouted.  “Over five hundred of my subjects are lost because of some silly prank you two pulled!” “Lost?  They’re not lost at all!  They’re exactly where they need to be.”  Discord pulled out an oversized map and indicated a spot in the middle of the Celestia Sea.  “See?  Right there is where they encountered the spatial rift that flung them into another dimension.  And now that they’ve arrived at their new home, they couldn’t be happier!” “YOU SENT THEM TO ANOTHER DIMENSION?!” “I sent them nowhere, dear Twilight.  Granted, I may have accidentally left a portal open during one of my earlier adventures, but they bear the responsibility for sailing right into it!  Such terrible navigation skills, it’s a wonder they were able to sail a straight course at all!” “Discord, bring them back.  Now.” Twilight demanded. “Twilight, didn’t you hear me?  They’re perfectly happy in Lunestia.  Would you really tear them away without a thought?” “They belong in Equestria!” “Obviously, they don’t.  At least not the Equestria you’re trying to build.  I’ve allowed them to find their own paradise, a place where there aren’t any pesky other races to get in their way.”  Discord lowered his voice conspiratorially and pressed his fingers together.  “And no other races to blame when something goes wrong.” “So you’re just going to leave them there.  Is that it?” “They’re happy in Lunestia; everycreature back here is happy.  It’s a win-win for everyone!”  Discord gave her his most disarming smile. “Discord, I know for a fact that Silken Veneer was brainwashed into joining them.  Don’t pretend everypony there is happy.” “You know it for a fact, hmm?  Wait just a second.”  Discord disappeared in a flash and reappeared exactly one second later, a disappointed look on his face.  “All right, I’ll admit you occasionally know what your subjects are thinking.  Score one for team Twilight.” Twilight shook her head in exasperation.  “This isn’t a contest, Discord.  I suppose I have no right to demand the return of ponies that don’t want to leave, but can you at least let those who want to come back do so?” “That’s the logical Twilight I know!”  Discord slithered close to Twilight, attempting a friendly hug, but was stopped cold by her outstretched hoof.  “All right.  I’ll admit letting the reluctant ponies go was a poor showing on my part.  They’ll be back.  Let’s allow their society to get established first, then I’ll bring them back.  You have my word.” “Establishing a society,” Twilight deadpanned.  “When do you expect that to be done?” Discord pulled out a pocketwatch and stared intently at it.  “I’d say… now.”  He snapped his claws and irised open a portal showing six boatloads of ponies just off the coast of Baltimare.  “Different dimension, remember?” he asked after seeing Twilight’s incredulous expression. “That’s it then?  Everypony is where they want to be?” “Exactly,” Discord grinned, sliding the portal closed.  “A neat little package, if I do say so myself.  Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ll be on my way.” “Not so fast,” Twilight commanded.  Her magic enveloped Discord and his progress halted.  He let out a sigh.  “What is it now, Twilight?” “I just need to know why.  Why did you and Zorapter decide to manipulate Warm Zephyr?  And why did you let the Zephyrites leave Equestria?” “Manipulate is such a harsh word, Twilight.  We merely guided Zephyr to the conclusion she wanted to reach anyway!  As far as letting them leave?  Theoretically, a bored Lord of chaos might want an independent group of ponies to observe.  You see, Twilight,” Discord continued, slipping back into lecture mode, “I recreated a simpler time for them.  A time when every problem they faced, every existential threat, it was their own doing!  Bringing them back to Season One, if you will.  Giving them a fresh start!  A civilization is driven to self improvement when it has no outside force to blame its troubles on!”  He paused for a second, then his expression turned troubled.  “Or, it self-destructs through infighting.  Hmm.  I'll have to put something in place to prevent that.” “Self improvement?”  Twilight’s face scrunched up into an expression somewhere between introspective and accusing.  “Is that what you were doing here?” “Which time?”  Discord asked innocently.  “The time I let Celestia and Luna turn my body into a statue so I could observe your race’s development without anypony suspecting?  Or were you referring to something more recent?” “More recent, definitely.”  Twilight sighed.  “I’m going to pretend I didn’t hear that first part.” “You said it yourself, Twilight.  The rebellion was inevitable.  I’m just glad you were able to finally find the root of the problem.”  He took on a sly expression.  “Isn’t self-improvement satisfying?” Twilight shook her head defeatedly.  “Some improvement.  Just promise me you won’t pull a stunt like this again.” “Why, Twilight,” the draconequus stated in mock offense, “Where’s the fun in that?  Now,” he said as he slowly dissolved into the floor, “I believe you have some royal business to attend to.” A sharp rapping on the door of the study interrupted any response Twilight might have given.  “My princess?” a muffled voice called from outside the room.  “Urgent message from Baltimare.  Your presence is requested immediately.” “Understood, Garrett,” Twilight responded.  “I’ll be out in a moment.”  She continued to herself, “Just cleaning up another draconequus mess…” “Come now, princess,” Discord’s voice came from below the floor.  “You know as well as I do: there’s nothing like a crisis to keep one’s mind sharp!” Twilight sighed again.  Rising from her chair, she made for the exit, preparing herself once again for her royal duty of reassuring her subjects.  But she had to agree: as much as she hated to admit it, a crisis was a welcome change from the humdrum of everyday life. “Just wait a bit before the next one,” she whispered to the floor. “Of course, Twilight,” the floor grinned slyly.  “See you next time!”