Fluttershy and her pet rabbit, "Angel." Walked through the woods on a sunny morning, gathering flowers. It was quiet, at least, until she heard gunshots echo out across the forest. A swarm of birds darted off into the sky. Followed by screaming, and an unusual amount of profanity.
"Oh, no..." She thought to herself, she knew well enough that that was no pony. It was William, out on another 'Excursion. 'And, being the element of kindness, she thought it best to go and try to assist whatever poor creature he was attacking." Some poor creatures in trouble, we have to help it!" She galloped off through the bushes. But when she finally burst out the other side, it was nothing close to what she expected. There, in the clear stood William and Pinkie. William had a cattle prod in one hand, and a riot shield in the other. On the far side, was Pinkie Pie. Who seemed to be taking the situation in front of her more like a friendly game of tag rather than an encounter with the quiet kid. Fluttershy turned her head, and caught sight of the problem. On a log on the far side of the clear lay a set of bagpipes.
"Oh, hi Fluttershy. Would you mind telling your friend here to stop playing that nonsensical bull####?!" He ordered, shifting his gaze to her for only a moment. She grimaced at this, on one hoof, she didn't want to tell Pinkie no. On the other, she didn't want William tearing her apart. "Well, at least no animals are getting hurt, right?" William let out a curse just as Pinkie tackled him. What followed was one of his signature screeches of agony/pain/anger. She recoiled as the horrid sound made contact with her ear drums.
"Oh my, uh...Common you 2, we can work this out peacefully, right?" Her enthusiasm disappeared when pinkie took a jolt of electricity to the neck. She bounced away from him for a few seconds, then dropped to the ground, unconscious. "Uh, that was a little extreme, don't you think?" She asked him nervously. He didn't respond, rather, he jumped to his feet
and aggressively hefted the shield in his hands, twirled the cattle prod. And braced himself for another attack. There was a moment of eerie silence. To everycretures surprise, Pinkie got up as through nothing had happened, and began bouncing around, her mane was standing up, and her eyes had a crazed look in them.
"Oh, hi there, may I take your order?! Alrighthaveagoodday!!!" She stumbled, gave a wave, the collapsed back on the ground and began snoring. William looked over at Fluttershy, and just shrugged. "DO whatever the hell you want with...This," He motioned to the Pink pony lying on the ground, "Not my problem anymore, I'm off to Ponyville."
"AH, DAMNIT, HOW HAS THAT HORSE NOT LEARNED HER LESSON?!?!?!" William shouted, coving his ears . He was currently standing on the very edge of Ponyville. And from some absurd reason, Pinkie Pie was still playing those infernal bagpipes of hers. It wasn't that he didn't like bagpipe music. Hell, the truth was actually quite the opposite, he loved it. Being that he was part Scottish, and part Irish. I was just that Pinkies rendition of it was borderline aneurysm inducing. Angered as though someone had just shot him in the foot. He charged over to the place where she was playing them. A white gazebo, in front of her dear friends, of all ponies.
"Let me guess, you don't like it either?" A familiar white and blue alicorn trotted up next to him, ears flattened against his head. "It's not the bagpipes, it's the pony playing the bagpipes." Joey nodded in understanding. And William approached the gazebo. Watching as everypony that was not Pinkie was actively disgusted by the sound of them.
"What is that thing?" He heard Applejack ask in bewilderment. "It's called a yoviofil. It's from Yakyakistan, where it's actually quite popular. William burst out laughing, then turned dead serious," That better not be a play on Afghanistan. Back on my world, we just called 'em bagpipes."
"Wait, you actually like this?" The 5 of them asked, he chuckled, "Oh heck no, it's awful. Now, please kindly tell her to stop before I put a .50 to her head and pull the trigger." Oddly enough, none of them said anything on the topic of him threating one of their own. "I knew them yaks weren't right in the head, this confirms it. "Is it supposed to sound like that?" Rainbow blurted out, covering her own ears." Not exactly," Twilight replied, "It's known to produce a fairly complicated melodically rich and harmonious tone. William snorted, "Sure it is. Alright Pinkie, time to go!" With a grunt, he got up on stage and tried to tug it away from her. He looked up, just in time to have a featherless bird drop on his head.
"Y'all have a screw lose- You know that?" They all rolled their eyes," Yes William. You're pointed that out many times." This whole time, he had his eyes on Pinkie." Can you believe this?!" She exclaimed. AT last, William pulled it out of her hooves. And began running away with it/
.
"Where are ya going with that thing?" Applejack called out. "I'm putting an end to this damned thing. It shall torture my ear drums no more!" With that, he lobed it as far forward as he could, took aim at it with an M79 thumper, and fired. The blast caused all ponies in the area to panic and flee, and a scorched crater was left in the ground. To both his shock and disappointment, it was somehow still intact. He just stood there, jaw open and launcher dangling from his arm. "Are you- Wha- How?!"
"Yakyakistan products are made to last!" Pinkie replied, snatching it back up from the ground while William's head was turned. He sighed, and walked away, " I hate you." He looked back at the 5, who where stranding there, shell shocked.
"Hey, idiot's, wake up!" He ordered, shaking them out of their trance. " You got a lot of nerve pulling a stunt like that in a crowded park!" Rainbow growled, the rest of them looked equally displeased." I don't car, I truly, truly don't."
" William, you have to stop. You've been getting more and more aggressive lately, and well..." Twilight's voice trailed off, William smirked, he knew the reaction they where anticipating out of him, and he wasn't going to let them get it. "It's ok, you don't have to finish that sentence. I know you despise me." He added softly. The group looked at him in confusion. "What do you mean by that?" rarity asked him, "We've been nothing but kind."
"I'm aware of that." He said in the same calm tone, this time, he toyed with the grip of his M45A1." William, this is getting weird," Joey butted in, "I saw the way you acted when you where a pony. How do you go from that... To taking a grenade launcher to a musical instrument in the middle of a crowded park? Are you bipolar?" William paused, he didn't really quite have a good answer for that question in the moment, he paced back in forth." No, I'm not. The doctors test me back on earth. I'm just weird." Without another word. He walked away. Not caring how they felt. And nor did he respond to any of their pleadings. He had one goal, the safety and solitude of his house. His bedroom in particular.