//------------------------------// // Chapter Nine: Far Out // Story: The Titans' Orb: Breaking Dawn // by Mister Horncastle //------------------------------// After a few hours of driving at high speed, I gave both myself and the yacht’s engine a break and headed down into the middle deck, where I found everyone hanging out in the living room area. Upon seeing me, Rarity hopped off the sofa and approached me with a concerned look. “So, I hear you and Rainbow Dash now plan to take narcotics?” She remarked. “And I presume you plan to scold me?” I replied blankly. “If you overdose and die, yes. What on Equus are you thinking?” “I’m on Earth, and I’m thinking that a touch of weed isn’t going to kill me.” I retorted. “Weed? What’s weed? Some slang term for all that junk in the smuggler’s bag? I want to know exactly what it is that you and Rainbow Dash plan to be injecting into yourselves!” “Hey now, chill out Rare, I promise we’re not going to touch any of the hard stuff. Trust me, I don’t want any of that toxic manufactured shit going into my system. The only thing I’m going to let us take is a plant-based drug called cannabis, which is often referred to as weed. It’s not got artificial stuff in it, it’s literally just dried up parts of the cannabis plant, which you smoke just like a regular cigarette.” I explained. Rarity didn’t seem all too convinced. Amazingly, Fluttershy came over to back me up. “You know, we have something pretty similar in Equestria, there’s a plant called magickana that was discovered down in the Hayseed Swamp, it has both medicinal and recreational uses, and its often smoked. Although it gets you pretty high and has a rather potent smell, it’s actually quite harmless so long as you use it in moderation.” After a short silence, Rarity simply raised an eyebrow and asked Fluttershy how she was so knowledgeable on the subject, to which she began to blush and recede back into herself. “Well… I, um… I have a friend who grows it, and she’s told me all about it.” Rarity continued to stare at Fluttershy with an iron gaze. She didn’t even need to speak, for her unblinking judgemental eyes were all that were needed to draw more information out of the pegasus. “Okay, okay! We may or may not have smoked it together on a couple of occasions! Please stop looking at me like that, I promise it’s not a regular thing! It’s just something I partake in with her now and then to reduce stress, it’s not easy working three jobs you know?” Tutting, Rarity rolled her eyes. “Oh Fluttershy, I really thought better of you.” The unicorn then planted a hoof on my chest. “You are only to smoke outside on the top deck, you are not going to stink up this place if I have anything to say about it. And I swear to Celestia, if I catch you with white powder around your nose, I will personally strangle you, do I make myself clear?” “Yes ma’am.” “And put on some different clothes for heavens’ sake! You look dreadful.” She was certainly right about that, I’d been wearing the same Desert Cloth attire that Hawnu Rey’eng had given us in Portugal, that was a little over a month ago! Despite being made from strong material, (enchanted material for that matter), they were now bloodstained from the fight and soggy from the swim over to the yacht with Twilight; they were a nice and comfortable set of clothes, perhaps I’d give them a wash soon. Applejack changed the subject by declaring she was going to start cooking supper soon, which quickly got Rarity off our backs. I headed down to the lower deck and browsed the wardrobes of each bedroom in search of clothing, there were a few pairs of shorts that fit me reasonably well, along with plenty of underwear. Going into the master bedroom and continuing my rummaging, I was able to locate a nice pair of grey jeans with an elasticated waistband, nice and comfy. “Those look nice.” Twilight murmured. “I thought so too, how’re you feeling?” I replied. “Awful.” “N’aw…” I sighed. After heading over and gently ruffling her mane, I continued to search through the drawers and wardrobes in search of a top, and at long last found a nice long-sleeved cotton tee, it was jet black with dark grey sleeves. “Very trendy.” Twi remarked. “Aye, they’ll go well with the jeans.” “Maybe have a wash before putting those on, I can smell you from here.” “Cheers Twi.” I grunted. “Only being honest.” Rolling my eyes, I took the clothes back up to the main deck and plonked them on the sofa, taking Twilight’s advice and hesitating before donning them. I headed up to the flybridge and proceeded to consult the manual in order to see how to get the hot tub up and running; a good soak would do me well, both for relaxation and to get a little cleaner. After switching it on and stripping down to my undies, I slid into the pool and was instantly met with the soothing warmth of the water, it had been so long since I’d had a bath, the last time was during my time in Paulo’s compound in Portugal, months ago. {I had one of Rarity’s magical bath bombs right before taking the portal to the Sahara, but that hardly counts as a bath, and it most certainly wasn’t relaxing!} I thought to myself with amusement. “Ooh, got room for two?” Pinkie asked, approaching the pool. “Hop on in!” I replied merrily. Apparently, this became an open invitation for everyone else to join me, and soon enough I was sharing the pool with Pinkie, Fluttershy, and Rainbow Dash. “Oh, this is good…” Dashie hummed. “Yeah, I needed this.” Fluttershy agreed. This was indeed lovely, the soothing warmth paired with the stimulating water jets offered a much needed destress after today’s fearful encounter; it pained me however that Twilight wasn’t able to join us, she needed the respite more than the lot of us put together, and I couldn’t help but feel somewhat guilty for enjoying the pool without her. After a good half-hour or so chatting, soaking and scrubbing, the lot of us clambered out of the pool and decided to crack on with the narcotics, (pun intended), but first I needed to dry off and swap to the fresh clothes. I lightly towelled myself off and then turned my back to everyone in order to remove the soaking underwear I’d been wearing in the pool without flashing myself to everyone. “That’s a butt!” Pinkie shrieked. “A very nice one at that.” Rainbow Dash added. “Oh piss off.” I replied, grabbing the fresh underwear and putting them on. I put on the new clothes and was quickly met with very positive reactions from everyone, it looked like this would be my new outfit for a while. Retrieving the smuggler’s bag and settling on the built-in sunbeds at the front of the yacht, I dug around and found the weed, tobacco, rolling paper, filters, and a lighter. “So, what does this shit do again? You’ve smoked it before, right?” Dashie asked. “No, it’s my first time actually.” “Then I suppose you’ll need someone to teach you.” Fluttershy remarked from behind us. The pegasus sat down beside us and educated us a little while I started to roll a few joints. “So, the first thing you need to know, as with most things, is to pace yourself. If you smoke too much at once and don’t allow yourself to adjust to it, you’ll pull a whitey.” “What’s a whitey?” Rainbow asked. “You go pale, get the shakes, and will most likely throw up.” Nervously giggling, she admitted that she’d pulled a whitey herself during her first time smoking the stuff with her friend. “So, who is this mysterious friend of yours? Who’s your dealer?” I teased, elbowing her playfully. “Oh, um, she’s somepony I met on one of my trips with the Equestrian Society for the Preservation of Rare Creatures, she noticed how shy and nervous I was and decided to talk to me. We got chatting and eventually she suggested smoking some magickana to calm my nerves. We’ve been meeting up and smoking it together now and then ever since.” “That’s awesome!” Dashie exclaimed. “So what’s her name?” I pressed. Breaking eye contact, she said that she would rather not say as she didn’t want us to laugh, to which we both promised that we wouldn’t. “Okay, well… Her name is Tree Hugger.” It took every ounce of my willpower to not instantly burst into laughter, and I could tell that Rainbow Dash was in the same boat (pardon the pun). Raising an eyebrow, I simply stated that it was certainly an interesting name. “Yeah, I know it sounds a little odd, her parents are huge environmentalists and weren’t really thinking of her when they named her. But she doesn’t mind at all, she grew up to be just like them so she actually quite likes the name now.” Fluttershy explained. “Fair enough.” I hummed. Moving on from the subject, I presented four relatively well-wrapped joints for us, thankfully I’d learned how to roll due to Paulo teaching me briefly back in Portugal. “Well, let’s not stand on ceremony, to drugs!” I cheered, lighting up the first joint. “To drugs!” Rainbow chimed in. I took the first toke, and goodness me was it different from a cigar! The first thing I experienced was the flavour, it was earthy and somewhat sweet, almost as though I’d just put a small handful of dirt and sugar into my mouth; it wasn’t exactly unpleasant, but it was definitely a weird encounter. Stifling a cough, I blew the smoke into the air and blinked a few times before giving my head a quick wobble. I then passed the joint to Fluttershy, who carefully took it with her wing and took a deep drag for herself, she closed her eyes and then allowed the smoke to slowly billow out of her nose like an absolute legend. “Whoa… Fluttershy… I didn’t know you were actually cool, that was awesome!” Dashie exclaimed. The yellow pegasus giggled. “So, is it like your Equestrian stuff?” I inquired. “Oh yeah, this is exactly the same.” She replied, taking another drag. Blowing the smoke into the air above her, she passed the joint to Dashie, who simply took with a hoof. “You know, I have to ask, how the bloody hell do you hold stuff like that?” I quizzed. “Magic, duh?” Rainbow sneered, before taking her first toke. The mare instantly made a fool of herself by choking and spluttering on the smoke, just as I had done when Paulo gave me my first cigar after finally earning his trust. “Holy shit that stuff’s strong!” She exclaimed. “You get used to it.” Flutters assured her. After taking another toke, (this time a successful one), Dashie passed the joint back to me and I continued to quiz the girls on the supposed magic that allowed them to grasp things with their hooves. “I don’t know exactly how it works, ask Twilight, she’s the egghead.” Rolling her eyes at Rainbow’s statement, Fluttershy went on to explain to the best of her knowledge that it was a magic-driven ability that all ponies possessed, regardless of race. Basically, there was an inherent flow of magic running through their bodies, and that their hooves had a relatively strong concentration of the stuff, which generated a weak telekinetic grasp whenever they used their hooves for holding things. This “hoof aura” could also be used to apply pressure to finer points on a surface, which explained how ponies are able to play musical instruments that would be more suited to fingers. “Huh, that’s actually really cool.” I muttered, taking another puff from the joint. “Yeah, I suppose it is, although it’s not very strong, it’s not like we can lift heavy objects with it, but it certainly helps for the more dextrous tasks in life.” She admitted. I handed the joint to Flutters and at last felt the marijuana kick in, I began to feel strange and a little bit tingly; it was like my skin was vibrating ever so slightly, and everything in my peripheral vision now had a very faint chromatic aberration to it. My stomach also began to feel tight, the best way to describe it was as though my body was undergoing a small panic attack, despite my mind being completely relaxed. “You feeling it?” Fluttershy asked. “Oh, I can feel it.” I replied. Rainbow Dash clearly felt it too judging from her expression, and as she passed back the joint to me, I could see that her eyes were already a little bloodshot, her face seemed rather pale too. “If you’re going to pull a whitey, please for the love of Celestia, do it off the side of the boat.” I ordered. “Nah, I’m good, I think…” She replied. “The key is to relax, it’s a much better experience if you don’t think too hard on it.” Fluttershy instructed. Nodding, I lay back in the sunbed and took a deep breath, shut my eyes, and then slowly exhaled and surrendered myself to the feeling, and almost instantly I could feel a difference; the knotted tension in my stomach released and I soon found myself feeling almost completely weightless. “Oh yeah, now I’m getting it.” I hummed merrily. Despite the buoyant feeling, I also found myself almost completely unable to move as though my muscles had melted away into a thick tar, which Fluttershy thankfully explained was completely normal. As we finished the first joint and I lit the second, it dawned on me that this was going to be a very pleasant afternoon indeed… “Well, well, well…” I looked up and found Rarity peering down at me, and even when upside down I could make out her judgemental scowl, how long had we all been out here? “You smell utterly revolting.” “That’s not even the weed, that’s just Callum.” Dashie remarked. Fluttershy started chortling through her teeth, emitting a ‘schh schh schh schh’ noise. “The lot of you smell utterly revolting!” “Okay fine, it’s probably the weed.” We all cackled and Rarity rolled her eyes, sighing heavily. “Well, I just came out to let you ridiculous catatonics know that dinner will be ready shortly, Applejack’s dishing up in five minutes, we’ve got pea salad tonight.” “Woo! Protein!” Rainbow Dash cheered. “Oh, I just love Applejack’s pea salad!” Fluttershy hummed approvingly, clapping her hooves. Tutting, the unicorn trotted away, leaving us to make an utterly pathetic attempt of getting ourselves up and out of our phlegmatic state, which really wasn’t easy after having just smoked so much cannabis, but the promise of good food certainly powered our drive to get our arses in gear. “It feels like my muscles are made out of jam.” Dashie groaned. “Yeah, that happens, which is exactly why Tree Hugger has snacks close by before lighting up.” “Clever.” I murmured, snapping my fingers. We packed everything back into the smuggler’s bag and slowly shambled indoors, where we found AJ and Rarity just setting down bowls full of Applejack’s supposedly well-known pea salad, Pinkie was already sat at the table, bobbing her head from side to side without a care in the world, clearly lost in her own little universe while she waited for her supper. “Smells delicious!” I praised, sitting down at the table. “Why thank you kindly! Though I can’t say the same for you three, y’all smell like Winona when she done got sprayed by a skunk! How goes the substance abuse outside?” She replied with a chuckle. “It’s going great, we are abusing the fuck out of those substances!” Rainbow Dash hooted, planting herself into the chair beside me and slumping against me. Rarity sat down opposite me and stated that if Rainbow Dash used another vulgar word in her presence, that it would be her that would be getting abused, to which we all laughed. “I don’t know Rare, I think she’d quite like that.” Applejack teased, raising her eyebrows. “Oh shut up, Applejack! What makes you think I’m into that sort of thing?” Dashie barked. To this, I laughed and gave it to her straight. “You’re a hot-headed adrenaline junkie with a constant need for approval, riddled with daddy issues and a well-known sex drive. Need I mention the numerous guys you’ve slept with, myself included? You constantly put on a dominant façade in an attempt to appear strong-willed and independent, when it’s clear as day that you’re actually extremely submissive and enjoy having a dominant individual around to lead you. Oh and trust me, I’ve seen first-hand, that covers both out and inside the bedroom. So all in all, I think you'd enjoy being thrown around a little bit, especially by Rarity, who screams dominatrix behind closed doors, don't you think?" After staring at me with her mouth agape for a few seconds, Dashie looked away with rosy cheeks and grunted that I may or may not have had a point. “I rest my case.” I announced with a grin. “Basically Rare, you can’t win.” Applejack teased. “Ugh, animals! The lot of you! Filthy animals!” Rarity sighed heavily, shaking her head. Moving on from the topic, I dug into AJ’s pea salad and it didn’t take me long to realise why it was so highly praised, it was absolutely delicious! “Damn, this is good!” “Don’t talk with your mouth full.” Rarity scolded me. The multitude of flavours that danced upon my taste buds were so incredibly strong, they’d be overpowering if not for being so complimentary of one another. “Seriously AJ this is incredible, what goes into this?” I demanded to know. “Hehe, it’s an old family recipe, Granny Smith taught me how to make it. It’s made up of three cups of steamed peas, one cup of diced cheese, three boiled eggs, also diced. It’s also got broken up hickory nuts, three tablespoons of mayonnaise and a single tablespoon of vinegar. It’s Big Mac’s favourite, one of mine too for that matter, it’s chock full of protein so it’s good for putting on muscle.” “Well, it’s absolutely scrumptious, I most certainly hope you’ll make this more often, it’s just as good as your leek and potato soup, if not better!” I exclaimed. “Awh shucks, I’m so glad to hear that! I’ll be sure to cook it again another time, it’s so easy to make. If I had known you’d like it so much, I’d have made it sooner!” Fluttershy then teasingly brought up the fact that it certainly helped to be high as a kite on weed, as it almost always rocked up an appetite; she then began to giggle to herself as she stared at the plethora of peas on her spoon. “What on Equus is so funny?” Rarity asked with a dumbfounded expression. The yellow pegasus then proceeded to tilt the spoon and allow a couple of peas to fall down and hit the deck, they rolled a few feet and then ceased to move, Fluttershy giggled even louder, before placing a hoof to her mouth and making her great amusement known. “Oops, I pea’d on the floor…” It was a joke so overwhelmingly stupid that it was actually quite funny, and Pinkie thought so too, for the pink pony burst into such an explosive laugh that she bombarded me with a mouthful of peas as though she were a living shotgun, the peas being the buckshot. “Cheers.” I grunted. A stoned Rainbow Dash found this ordeal even funnier than Pinkie found the joke, as she too burst into a violent laughing fit and somehow was able to unintentionally inhale a pea and shoot it out of her nose. “Rainbow Dash!” Fluttershy gasped loudly. “How… How is this my life?” Rarity moaned, burying her head into the table. “I can’t believe you just did that…” Applejack sighed, rolling her eyes. “My brother did that once, but with a chip.” I said, chuckling. “What, a whole potato chip?” Dashie asked, astounded. “No no, I mean like a long thin strip of potato that’s been deep fried, they’re sometimes called fries, but in England we call them chips.” I explained. “Oh right, well we call those fries in Equestria too, made from either hay or potato.” “I had a feeling.” “So, how the heck did he do that?” “Well, we were pretty young at the time, but if memory serves me correctly, it happened in an airport. We were on our way back from a family holiday in France, and we were at some fast-food place called Burger King. And I either said or did something that made him laugh, just as he’d stuffed a load of fries into his mouth, and lo and behold, one of them popped out of his nose! It just dangled there from his nostril. Bloody big old thing, easily as long as a finger.” “That’s absolutely vile.” Rarity spoke sternly, wrinkling her nose. “Nah, the vile bit is where he then proceeded to pull it out and eat it.” “Oh Callum for goodness sake! I’m EATING!” Rainbow Dash smacked the table with a hoof and howled with laughter, to which Applejack smirked and shook her head in amused distaste, even Fluttershy was lightly giggling to herself over the anecdote. The hysterics soon died down and the noise with it, as we all tucked into dinner once again. After we finished up, I decided to take a bowl of the salad down to Twilight as she’d most likely be hungry, I found her curled up in a miserable heap, shivering. “Hey, you alright?” I asked quietly. The unicorn raised her head and looked at me with a listless expression, the poor thing looked absolutely dreadful; upon smelling the food she seemed to perk up, I came and sat down beside her and asked if she wanted help with eating, to which she reluctantly agreed to. “I swear if you pull the ‘here comes the chariot’ nonsense, I’ll kill you.” She joked. “Lucky for you, 'here comes the chariot' doesn’t exist on Earth.” I retorted. I then proceeded to bring a spoonful to her face and used the human variant instead, just to spite her. “But look! Here comes the aeroplane! Nyeeeooowm!” Twilight pursed her lips and glared at me with the wrath of a thousand hells, to which I snickered profusely and then promised I wouldn’t do it again. Continuing to scowl at me, she opened her mouth and took the spoonful, to which she clamped her eyes shut and hummed merrily. “Mmmn, it’s been far too long since Applejack’s done a pea salad.” “Aye, it’s one of the nicest things she’s ever cooked.” After quietly munching a few more mouthfuls, she looked up at me with a knowing smirk. “You’re high as fuck, aren’t you?” “How’d you guess?” I tittered. “Well firstly, your eyes are so bloodshot that I can barely see any white. Secondly, they’re practically closed because you’re so relaxed. And thirdly, you reek of magickana.” Dipping my head and grinning, I admitted that I’d cracked into the marijuana with Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy, just to take the edge off after such a stressful and exhausting day. “I see.” The unicorn murmured, raising an eyebrow. “Hang on a second… How do you know what magickana smells like?” I inquired. “Science experiment, I wanted to know how my studying and writing would be affected while under the influence of a psychedelic substance.” She explained. “And the conclusion?” “Oh they were terrible. I forgot what I was actually meant to be studying, and half of my notes ended up being nothing more than a senseless rant on how best to consume string cheese.” “That’s, fucking incredible!” I laughed. “I suppose it was quite amusing.” She admitted. “Well, what is the best way to consume string cheese?” “Stripped into individual pieces and then equally placed on corn chips, resulting in a perfectly even bowl of nachos where each bite is full of flavour and satisfaction.” “So, let me get this straight. You, Twilight Sparkle, got high on drugs, and wrote a dissertation on nachos?” Nervously giggling, she stated that it wasn’t exactly her proudest moment, to which I replied that she should be incredibly proud of herself, for nachos were one of the greatest inventions known to man and ponykind alike. “Sounds like I’m not the only one who likes nachos.” She giggled. “Oh I absolutely love nachos, they’re my favourite snack!” “Mine too!” “Great, now I have the munchies for nachos.” I groaned. “I’m not even high and I’ve got the munchies for nachos now.” She replied playfully. It was then that I had an incredible idea. “Yo, what do you think my mindscape would look like whilst being high?” “Want to find out?” She didn’t need to tell me twice, I bounced off the bed and dug through Twilight’s bag until I found the collars; I then shut the bedroom door for privacy and got back onto the bed. I then made sure my collar had the switch pointing towards the ‘host’ option, to make sure that we both went into my head and not Twilight’s, funnily enough this caused her collar’s switch to automatically flick away from host and instead point towards the ‘link’ setting, whatever magic Hawnu Rey’eng had imbued into these collars, it was strong. “You ready?” Twilight asked. “Send it.” I replied. We put the collars around our necks and I made sure they were both clipped on, we then both got comfortable and I pushed the little button beside the switch. There was a humming sound, a flash of white light, and then complete and utter darkness. I slowly opened my eyes to find myself lying on my back, and way up above me were the bare branches of the trees of my mindscape, swaying around and occasionally curling as though they were writhing tentacles. Beyond them were stars twinkling at me from a cloudless night sky, although upon concentrating on them for a few seconds, they revealed themselves to be none-other than countless floating teeth. “Well that’s odd.” I hummed to myself. Upon speaking, I instantly realised that my voice was a few octaves higher; raising my hands up into view, I found lavender hooves in their place, and it dawned on me that I was yet again in Twilight’s body. {Never thought I’d be doing this again.} I thought as I rolled over and got to my hooves. I was officially in the Hollow Forest, so much was clear as the grass before me was pale and mostly yellow, and the trees were ensnared in the black vines that represented my depression; interestingly however, I noticed that the vines were much thinner than I recall from my last visit, and some of them weren’t even hugging the trunks anymore, they were snaking outward in a twisted and contorted manner. Was this a result of the weed? Perhaps it had weakened them so drastically that they couldn’t even maintain a grip on the trees, it was a relatively well-known fact that natural narcotics had numerous benefits for one’s mental health. Reaching out and brushing one of these outstretched vines, I found the texture to be quite rubbery. Without warning, it wrapped around my foreleg and caused me to yelp loudly in shock, I pulled back and the vine broke apart, dropping to the ground and scattering into a multitude of little scraps. “Callum?” An anxious voice called out. My keen pony ears instinctively twisted to the direction of the call, I turned around and saw some bushes rustling in the distance. “Twilight? That you?” I replied. The bushes were batted away and out came Twilight, inhabiting my body and stumbling around like a toddler, naked as a new-born, except… “Now, I know what you’re going to say, but-” “Why the fuck are you wearing a crown?” I blurted out. “Can I please explain?” “Hang on, is that… No... Is that Princess Celestia’s crown? Oh my god, it is!” “It was an experiment, okay? And a successful one at that!” “Explain yourself, wench!” Rolling her eyes, Twilight explained that the last time we swapped bodies in the Frozen Forest, she had woken up completely nude, which Stardust had teasingly speculated that it was because she was picturing me naked shortly before putting on the collars and entering the mindscape, on account of the whole fiasco with me sleeping with Rainbow Dash. “M-hmm?” I hummed judgingly. “Well, I wanted to test the theory, by forcing myself to picture you in something specific, hence the crown.” “Just the crown? And what about the full-frontal nudity I’m currently enduring?” “Oh, well, I thought it would be funny.” She giggled. “Firstly, bullshit. Secondly, please never giggle in my body again.” Taking off the crown, Twilight placed it upon my head and smirked. “Hm, I always wondered what I’d look like as a princess.” “Funny that. And now you’ll never know again. Yeet!” I removed the crown with my telekinesis and launched it into the air and far away over the trees. After giving me a disgruntled expression for a moment, Twilight shook her head and started investigating the closest tree, examining the black tendrils that lightly wrapped around it. “Well the drugs have certainly made a difference, these things barely have a grip!” “That’s nothing, did you see the sky teeth?” I replied. “Excuse me? Did you just say- DEAR SWEET CELESTIA THOSE ARE SKY TEETH!” “As I said, sky teeth.” After getting over the shock from a sky full of glittering teeth, Twilight suggested we take a stroll through the woodland and see what other weird shit we could find in my mindscape, to which I agreed. “Before we go though, can we please figure out a way to clothe you?” I implored. “Yeah, good call. Admittedly I’m feeling a bit exposed.” “It was your idea to picture me naked before we came here.” “Well now I’m regretting it, okay?” Chuckling, I shut my eyes and tried to envision myself in the clothes I’d recently found on the yacht. After a short while of focusing on them, I noticed a nearby tree groaning loudly. I opened my eyes again and found that the tree had split open its own trunk, and inside, were the clothes. “Whoa…” I murmured. Twilight swiftly went over and retrieved them, before putting them on and giving me a sheepish grin. “Thanks!” “Don’t mention it.” I deadpanned. We set foot (and hoof) into the Hollow Forest, eager to discover the drug-induced anomalies that came next. About an hour had passed, and boy had it been wild; the vast majority of the experiences had been vaguely connected to pleasant memories of my past, including my father showing up once or twice to tell me he that was proud of me; this would have been comforting, if he hadn’t had squid tentacles for fingers and vaginas for eyes. Needless to say, we had witnessed some absolute nonsense, some of it being utterly horrifying. We had just waved goodbye to a legion of bipedal mushrooms, when we came across my old house. “Where it all began.” I mumbled. “Yeah…” Twilight sighed. The lights were off and upon peering through the window, I found that the interior was completely empty, so I guessed that this fragment of memory was simply the outside of the place, so we strolled into the back garden and sat down together at the old picnic bench which I used to enjoy sitting at. It was then that we were both startled by a cartoon version of Pinkie Pie wearing a chef’s hat, whom appeared out of nowhere and demanded to take our order. “Oh gosh, I forgot this is what we look like in the human cartoon.” Twilight groaned. “Yeah, it’s pretty jarring after seeing what you really look like.” I admitted. “Orders please!” Pinkie shrieked. “Okay! Okay! Um… I’ll have…” I started, trying to think of something. “Two plates of nachos, with string cheese!” Twilight demanded. “Yes sir! Or ma’am! Or both! Or neither!” Pinkie Pie then proceeded to charge off into the night, repeatedly screaming ‘chimicherrychanga’ to herself until she eventually faded away into the night. “Good thinking.” I said. “Think she’ll actually come back with the nachos?” She replied. “If I can summon you clothes in this place just by memory, it’s certainly possible. Perhaps she’s run off to dig up a memory from when I last ate them?” I suggested. “Perhaps.” Twiley hummed. While we waited for our order, we quite fittingly chatted about the past, and recalled how many close calls we’d had across our journey. “I still can’t believe you started a revolt within a Brazilian drug cartel.” “Well I wasn’t going to just sit there, I had to do something.” “Yeah, but you managed to pull it off while being malnourished and after being recently tortured!” Exhaling heavily, I thought back to that godawful time in Brazil, it was honestly the worst part of the adventure so far; I was an unprepared boy still bewildered by the ponies’ existence, not fit to be a guide or a protector. Everything I did back there was fuelled on adrenaline and panic, and if I hadn’t been so reckless, we’d have never been captured by Inigo’s cartel in the first place; so much time and pain would have been saved if I could just go back and do it all over again, knowing what I know now. My thoughts were interrupted by Pinkie returning with two bowls of steaming hot nachos, generously coated in strips of mozzarella cheese. The more notable thing was that Pinkie’s head had been replaced by Nicole’s, the girl I’d met while a captive in Inigo’s compound whom had nursed me back to health. “Uh, thanks… Nicole?” I nervously chuckled. “Anytime!” The horrific human-pony hybrid replied. She put the bowls down onto the picnic table, performed a curtsy, and then burst into glitter, cascading to the ground and ceasing to exist; I shrugged and used my magic to levitate a nacho into my mouth. “Oh damn, this is good…” I moaned. “Mmmmmnn…” Twilight replied, her eyes shut and her mouth stuffed full. We munched and crunched, barely talking at all as we dined on nachos together, it tasted just as good as I remembered, which made perfect sense as they literally were a remembrance. When we finally finished, we merrily strode into the middle of the garden and flopped onto the cool pale grass together, licking our lips and humming, savouring the last of the memory. “I’m so glad we did this.” Twilight sighed, smiling warmly. “Me too.” I replied. Twilight stretched dramatically, before rolling over and cuddling up against me, pressing her cheek into my extra fluffy pony chest. “Whoa, I didn’t realise I was this soft…” “You didn’t?” “No, I guess when you’re covered in fur from top to bottom, everything just feels like more fur.” “Yeah, that makes sense.” Continuing to lick my lips, I remarked that I now completely understood why Twilight had written a whole essay on nachos, to which she giggled and stated that nachos were a very important topic that she’ll someday get all academic institutes to appreciate. I followed up by insisting that one day in the future, when she was back home in Equestria, I wanted her to dig up the essay and somehow get it to me on Earth, for I very much wanted to read it. It was then that her face dropped, and her eyes grew clouded with emotion as they stared into my own. “Is it that badly written?” I teased. She opened her mouth to speak, but no words came forth, she just looked at me. And then finally, she was able to lightly shake her head and breathe a phrase which passed straight through my skin and struck right into my heart. “I don’t want to leave you.” “Oh, Twilight…” Tears welled up in her eyes and she sat up, gripping one of my hooves with a hand. “After everything we’ve been through, after all you’ve done for us, for me, and we have to leave you behind. It just feels wrong, so overwhelmingly wrong!” Sighing, I used my other hoof to cup her hand and lightly stroked the back of it, trying to comfort her. “You know just as well as I do what will happen if I come with you, we both saw that vision, we both saw Ponyville being burned to the ground. No matter how hard it is, we know it has to be this way. We need to remember what’s truly at stake, and make the most of the time we have.” “I know all that, but I don’t think I can leave you.” “Twilight, what are you saying?” There was a long pause, before she gave her answer. “I want to stay here on Earth with you.”