//------------------------------// // Luna’s Dilemma // Story: Paint The Moon Red // by AuroraDawn //------------------------------// Luna paced incessantly around her room, gnawing nervously at a hoof. Celestia watched her silently from where she sat at the edge of the bed, concern evident on her slender face. She said nothing, however, knowing it would only make things worse. Luna paused once, scanning about the room. It was midafternoon, but heavy velvet curtains of indigo and blue blotted out the sun handily, and one couldn’t tell that it was day by the room’s light alone. As it was, the muted purples and golds of the Canterlot castle trim were highlighted by a fireplace that crackled quietly opposite the bed. Luna looked down at the carpet beneath her hooves, and then to her sister. “I’m going to wear out this rug, aren’t I?” she asked. Her thoughts diverged from her, and briefly she considered trampling back and forth over Celestia instead of the rug, and she shook her head to clear the idea. “Mhmm,” Celestia said, clearly choosing her words carefully. “I can move it for you if you’d like,” she offered quietly, “but I’m sure Twilight will be here shortly, so in the meantime if you need to pace, please, Sister, pace.” Luna’s thoughts splashed and rocked with vitriol. She didn’t need her sister to move the damn rug for her, she was able enough herself! She shook her head again, forcing the hate out by repeating what her sister had said. Twilight, indeed, would be here shortly. She allowed herself to continue pacing guiltfree, taking slight comfort in the near-darkness of the room. Despite her issue, she did not blame the night. That had been her charge for longer than most ponies would remember, and would continue to be for quite some time. She adored the night, the quiet stillness and serenity it brought, and the wonderful changes to the world that a rising moon could bring. If only she wasn’t the only one to love it so, she felt. That seemed to be the issue, always; others didn’t love the night she brought. They didn’t love something so vastly and monumentally important to their wellbeing, because it was so important that they simply expected it would be there; and so she had provided, selflessly, for as long as she could remember. Save for a prior incident, of course.  She shook with anger and whipped her head around to Celestia, ready to bark and hiss at her, when there came a rap at the door. Celestia did not look to the door when the knock came, however; she stared at her sister still with that same concern, though when she saw the fury in Luna’s eyes, had leaned back ever so slightly. It was a practically imperceptible movement, but Luna perceived it all the same, and she shrank back herself, mumbling something that sounded like an apology. There came another knock, and Luna spoke. “Announce thy presence,” she said, and some of the building anger leaked out with her call. “Princess Twilight to see you, your Highness,” came the voice of one of her thestral guards. “Ah, finally. Send her in, please.” The door opened, though only wide enough to permit Twilight to pass through without squeezing. She looked back curiously at the door and the guard while she continued in, and looked even more puzzled when the guard quickly shut the door, cutting off the sudden beam of light that had trespassed into Luna’s room. “Hello, your Highnesses,” she began, genuflecting before the other alicorns. “Is everything alright? Well, I suppose not, you did summon me stating there was an issue… But with you two personally, I mean.” She smiled briefly but it faltered after she had a moment to read the room. Both Luna and Celestia stared at her with blank faces before turning to look at each other.  “...No,” came a unified reply. Celestia continued while Luna turned her head up and away. “We are not alright, Twilight. There’s an issue we’re hoping you can help with, though we fear it may be beyond any of us. This goes a bit further than a friendship issue, I fear, and the two of us are stumped. I have faith in you, though,” she said in her usual gentle manner. Twilight gave another smile, more of an offer of comfort than for any personal feelings. “Certainly!” she said, and she walked forward before stumbling on the now-flattened carpet in the middle of the room. “Oh, whoops. How come it’s so dark in here?” “Why must there always be such a call for light?” Luna hissed, whipping her head back around. Twilight recoiled at her sharp tone, shocked at the demeanor from the young (relatively speaking) princess. “The... fire gives plenty to see by,” she said, almost apologetically. She sat down then, her face creased in concern. “I’m sorry.” “It’s okay! I’ve been stressed before—quite often, really—and I know how ponies can get. So…” she trailed, looking back and forth between the alicorns before her. It was some sort of personal issue between them, she realized easily, though she wondered what Celestia meant by it being beyond a friendship issue. “What exactly is the problem?” “Her,” both sisters said, pointing at the other, though after a shake of her head, Luna corrected herself. “No, it is me, actually. Well not me. I mean, I certainly hope it’s not me, though after the last couple months I’ve been thinking that maybe it actually is me, and that what you see before you isn’t me, but-” She paused, looking at the consternation enveloping Twilight’s face. “Uh, it’s me. I’m the problem.” Twilight very slowly tore her gaze from Luna towards Celestia, who nodded solemnly.  “...Are you… alright, Luna?” she said, testing the waters. “I am far from alright, Twilight. I have been plagued by Nightmare recently, and every night it gets worse.” “Oh, bad dreams? Are they really that serious, your Highness?” “Not nightmares, Twilight,” Celestia cut in before Luna could rebuke her, catching the steely glint that appeared in Luna’s eyes at Twilight’s question. “Nightmare. As in Nightmare Moon.” “She perverts my thoughts and feelings even now,” Luna said with a sigh. “Please do not take my outbursts personally. They are born not from specific enmity towards you, but from an undying hatred within my soul. “I hate that it’s within me,” she continued, looking apologetic to Twilight and Celestia. “I had come so far with learning and understanding all that it is Sister does, and the importance and value of my work as well. I know there must be balance, and I know that Celestia’s work is not as glamorous as it seems. All the same, there burns inside my soul this discord, and it festers and grows despite all my lessons in patience.” She grimaced, and Twilight could see fear in her eyes for just a moment before they glazed over with anger yet again. Luna closed her eyes, ashamed, and looked to the floor. “But… How can it be Nightmare Moon? That was some possession, was it not? Dark magic of some kind? We banished it with the Elements of Harmony.” Twilight began pacing then herself, following the worn path in the rug. “Perhaps they could again…?” She suggested, letting the implication lie in the air. Luna shook her head. “The Nightmare is more than some simple enchantment I had been enthralled with.” She looked at Celestia, and then back to Twilight. “I say this not out of arrogance, but I must cast aside humility for a moment. Alicorns like Celestia and I are outrageously powerful. Dangerously so, even. The Nightmare is not so much something that overcomes me, but something I allow myself to be. Do you understand?” “I… I don’t really, no.” “Let me try to rephrase,” Celestia said, ignoring the wicked glance Luna gave her at the interruption. “Luna and I are much like tuning forks. Given a base harmony, we sing, and our music—and magic—flows easily and loudly. But we are also subject to vibrations from outside and within.” Luna picked up from there. “With Nightmare, there is a discordant tone at my very core, and it steals from my harmony. I become ‘out of tune’, you could say, if ever I am unable to forfend against its dissonant call. This is what happened when I first fell.” She approached Celestia and hugged her, and the sister responded in kind. Twilight could see that it took great effort for Luna to remain where she was for the scant time she held the embrace, but the expression was genuine, and Celestia smiled warmly for the first time that day. “The Elements cannot be used by a single pony, even one as powerful as my sister. When she used them on me, they locked me on the Moon, as punishment to my sister and I both. When you and your friends used them on me, things were different. The Elements detected harmony and responded in kind, and I was overwhelmed with it, and tuned, you could say.” “But it didn’t resolve the instrument providing the dreadful tune?” Twilight asked. “Precisely. And despite all the compassion and love I have learned from my sister and your friends, it plays on, tainting me once again.” She dropped her head again, and Twilight was shocked to see tears beginning to fall from her face. She spoke, without looking up, and her voice was drenched with sorrow. “I cannot fight it much longer. Before long, the Nightmare will return, and I will attack my sister and all others I love. We cannot always depend on the Elements to reset me for only a few years, Twilight.” She sniffed. “I fear the only permanent solution would be banishment for eternity, or worse. I don’t know what to do!”  Twilight stepped back at Luna’s despairing shout, and she sat down and started tapping her chin. Celestia had reached a leg out to comfort her sister, but it was smacked away, and she stood down. “I won’t let that happen, no matter what,” Twilight said confidently. “Though I am not sure quite yet how to do so…” She trailed off, thinking. What she needed was more information. Luna was right in that the Elements could not be depended on; should something happen to her and her friends, or if they were halfway around Equus on some world-saving quest, there would be no way to reset Luna. As well, she could see the hurt it was causing both of them. To let Luna experience that a hundred times again and again was unacceptable. There had to be another way. “If I may,” she started hesitantly, “I’d like to ask Luna some questions about Nightmare. Questions that I think she could answer more easily were you not present, Princess Celestia. I’m sorry to ask you but,” she shrank back and gave an awkward friendly smile, “would you mind stepping outside? Just for a moment?” Celestia did not object. She stood up quietly, gave one last supportive glance at Luna, and then walked out, leaving Luna and Twilight in the shadowy bedroom. “What is it you wish to know, Twilight?” Luna asked, moving to her bed and sitting down where Celestia had sat. “This… ‘discordant music’, the thoughts, what are they exactly? I remember the old books mentioning jealousy, but nothing more. Are you able to tell me what they say?” Luna held herself back from lashing out and screaming her current train of thought at Twilight. An unrighteous fury burned in her stomach for a moment before she strained and smothered it. “You may. I will try to… repeat them as neutrally as possible, but when I move down these streams of thought, they tend to reinforce and more greatly express themselves. Please, Twilight, be patient with me.” “Always, Princess Luna,” Twilight responded, bowing her head. “Thank you. At first and foremost, it is the unappreciation that I feel.” She paused for a moment for Twilight to interject that she was appreciated, but the purple pony simply sat silently, and Luna was thankful for it. “I know that it isn’t the case, and the work I do; the dreams, the moonscapes, the cool refreshment of night, are appreciated. I’m told as such whenever I express my concerns, but it feels so much like I am just a child being placated. There’s always this voice that taunts me, telling me that my nights are not enjoyed.  “I love the night so much, Twilight. I don’t know if I can express it properly, but the bond between me and a moonlit sky is much the same, I’m sure, to the one between you and your friends. I feel misunderstood, as well, for when I try to share this love, try to share the splendor of a beautiful night, I am simply mollified, assuaged that ‘yes dear, it is indeed lovely, goodnight, I’ll see you in the morning.’” She said her last sentence mockingly, and her voice began to quaver. “I work endlessly to provide and all the while Sister sits upon her throne and is beguiled and delighted upon by all the castle staff and citizens. Yes, she works hard as well, but why does she get all the praise and adoration?!” She was standing now, no longer seeing Twilight, but fuming at the worn-out rug. “If only they could see how lovely my nights are! If they could experience the starry skies I raise, breathe the restorative air of darkness, and love me for what I deserve!” She was crying again, though her voice was anything but sorrowful. Her inflections were sulfurous and acidic, and her head twisted strangely as Luna tried to control her anger. For the briefest of moments, Twilight felt she saw the familiar jagged teeth of Nightmare Moon, and she leapt up from where she was standing and put a hoof around the Princess, holding her tight, and the vision vanished. “You’re right to be angry for that reason,” she said sternly, keeping her embrace around Luna while she shook. The angry mare did not fight Twilight however, only seethed through her teeth. “But your reasoning is flawed.” “WHAT?!” Luna whipped around, throwing Twilight to the floor. Twilight scrambled up quickly and ran forward, hugging Luna again. Again, she did not fight her.  “Please breathe, Luna. I’ll explain in a moment. It’s okay. You’re loved, and understood. It’s okay.” Luna’s breathing became deep, forceful breaths, and after a moment they slowed and became more normal. It was probably five minutes later by Twilight’s account when she finally spoke. “You may release me now, Twilight. Thank you.” Twilight complied, and led Luna back to her bed where they both sat next to each other. There was another moment of silence, before Luna lifted her head and spoke again. “What did you mean by that, though?” “You and I both know what the actual problem is. It’s not that you are truly unappreciated, but that you feel unappreciated. You said it yourself, ‘feel’. The solution then is not to tell you that you are, but to show you.” “But I have been shown, many times, and yet still the venom lingers.” She was looking curiously at Twilight. “Right. But then again, the pony just speaking to me now was not you. It was Nightmare Moon. It is she who feels unappreciated. I think that if we show Nightmare Moon just how much the ponies of Equestria truly love her—and your—nights, she may not ever need to come back.” Luna frowned. “What are you suggesting?” Twilight slid from the bed and went to the door, opening it up. She saw Celestia sitting anxiously on the bench across the hall, clearly disturbed by whatever yelling she had heard, and beckoned her back in the room. When the two of them were both in and seated, Twilight began. “I think we need to take Nightmare Moon partying,” she said, cheerfully.  The reply came in unison, as before. “What.”  “Bear with me. Nightmare Moon is not so much a possession of Luna, but a manifestation of her power out of harmony, correct?” Luna nodded, and Twilight continued. “So she is very much still Luna, but with cognitive behaviors that are counterintuitive to a normal functioning society.” “Twilight…” Celestia said, disapprovingly. Twilight continued unabated. “I think that if we prove to Nightmare Moon that her nights are well and truly acknowledged and loved, we might deal with her permanently. No more will Luna have intrusive thoughts that she’s unloved, because we’ll have proven directly to her negative psyche that she’s wrong. “Nightmare Night, fittingly, is here in three week’s time. Are you able to hold Nightmare back until that time, Luna?” “I believe I can fight her for another two months, before I succumb.” “Excellent. I want you to give in to her on Nightmare Night.” Luna and Celestia exchanged glances yet again, and then back down to the proud purple pony before them.  “And what’s the plan for Nightmare Night, then?” Celestia asked, still wary. Twilight beamed. “We’re going to throw the greatest party Equestria has ever seen.”