//------------------------------// // Chapter 19 // Story: Ocean Blues // by TalkingToMyself //------------------------------// Blue and Spring had arrived at the station long before the train was due. Spring paid for two tickets and Blue watched anxiously, her wings twitched nervously every few seconds. She had taken the day off from the weather patrol today and Spring Meadow had switched shifts with Tenderheart, so they were both free from work. Nopony had asked any questions about it. The few ponies at the station didn’t seem bothered by the two sisters either. Everything looked normal, just two mares on their free day and taking a trip to Canterlot. Tomorrow, they would be back at work and life would just go on as usual. Nopony had an idea that this day might be the last for Spring Meadow and Ocean Shore as ponies. Three moons had passed since Blue and Spring had first entered Equestria through a magic mirror. One week of getting used to entirely new bodies, another of learning the way of life in this new world. Two more weeks of constant change, from finding jobs to moving into a new home, each day with something new to learn and new ponies to meet. After that, a period of settling in. Waking up in the morning and not feeling weird with hooves. Settling into a peaceful routine and making some friends for both of them. Visiting Princess Twilight Sparkle and Starlight Glimmer at the castle a few times. Then last week, a letter from Canterlot with a royal seal on it. Blue and Spring didn’t talk at all when the train carried them towards the big city by the mountain with the white fairy tale castle engraved into the flank of the mountain. Their whole time so far had been nothing short of a fairy tale, so the castle fitted right in, both unreal but at the same time so normal that nopony on the train even mentioned it. They took the busiest streets through the city and towards the royal palace. They did so on purpose, since every delay was welcome and good. Blue pressed her wings tightly against her flanks so she wouldn’t even think of flying off. Not that she would leave her sister alone anyways. Even the longest walk couldn’t last forever though, and soon they arrived at the great entrance. Spring Meadow showed the letter and they were let in, then a guardspony led them through the palace. Blue glanced left and right, but she didn’t care much about architecture or the pieces of art that decorated every hallway. Instead, she was watching the ponies. Every hallway and every room was bustling with ponies. Some of them had uniforms, like guards or maids with their typical hats, many ponies also wore some vests which Blue guessed meant that they belonged to the palace staff, others were clearly nobles and wore crests on their clothes and jewellery. She even saw a few creatures that were not ponies at all, like a group of griffons and a big, towering yak. The other ponies treated them with great respect and Blue couldn’t help but wonder if they would be as friendly if Blue would walk around them in her natural form. No matter how different the ponies looked like, they all smiled. From the big bubbly bursting grin she knew from Pinkie Pie to a slim, satisfied smile, Blue could see all variants of smiles. She thought back of the first day she had walked through Canterlot High when she thought all those smiles had to be fake. She didn’t believe that anymore. Maybe that was a good sign. If ponies were smiling, it meant they were happy. If they are happy working in the palace, then it meant the princesses were nice ponies and they liked working for them. It matched up with everything Blue heard from anypony, even from Princess Twilight. Princess Celestia and Princess Luna were the kindest, nicest, and most benevolent ponies that ever existed. They would never make them leave or kick them out or anything, right? But then, Blue also knew Sunset Shimmer. Sunset had seen Princess Celestia’s angry side and she knew that the princess didn’t like if anypony questioned her authority. She didn’t know what this meant for Spring Meadow and her. As Blue followed the guard towards some meeting room, she found herself hoping. It was surprising even to herself. Back on Earth, when she had been faced with a big decision like this, she’d always assumed the worst and she had always been angry. She had acted like she didn’t care, she had always just shrugged and said “Whatever”, but inside she was boiling. Pinkie Pie and the others, they had seen through it after a while and called it “the face” whenever she worried about something so much that she got angry. Spring didn’t do much better. When Blue got angry, her big sister would instead just pull back into herself. She would find someplace where nothing mattered to her and nothing could touch her. As Blue watched her sister, she could tell that Spring Meadow was about to go to that place again. Unlike Blue, Spring didn’t dare to hope. The room they ended up in was rather small and unassuming, which was fair since their mere presence in Equestria was one big secret. It would have caused too much commotion if they used the throne room, as two regular ponies like Ocean Shore and Spring Meadow weren’t important enough to get a private audience with the Princesses. Blue looked around to pass time and to distract herself from the nervous jitters. The room had big windows for light and was tall, there was a big wooden table in the centre and comfy cushions to sit. Three of them were bigger, one white and the other two purple and blue, so they probably belonged to the Princesses. Like the hallways, this room had paintings on the walls and some potted plants as well. Even if it was a small room, it was still a very nice room. Blue smiled and took it as a good sign. They were early, of course. They were excited, nervous, and scared, so of course they were early. After a few minutes, there was a knock on the door and one of the maid ponies they had seen earlier walked in. She brought a cart, like the ones Blue knew people used on trains or such, with everything to fix any kind of drink, even coffee or tea. She smiled, of course, and was very friendly. They chatted about the weather, about the palace and the princesses. They got a cup of their favourite tea each and sipped on their cups as the mare set up more cups and teapots on each seat and left a few snacks. The biggest platter with slices of cake was placed directly in front of the princess’ seats and the maid gave them a knowing wink. All in all, she had only been there for a couple of minutes. Blue still felt better, somehow. The mare was just another little sign, like the many others she had seen all over Equestria. This world was different, so she could hope. She had good reasons to hope. She wanted to hope. And with time, she would help Spring Meadow start to hope and smile too. The door opened as Princess Twilight stepped inside and immediately drew them both into a hug. Blue smiled and just surrendered to her fate, but Spring Meadow squirmed a little, she still thought that it was weird that a princess would just hug random ponies. As expected, Twilight took her seat on the purple pillow next to Blue “How did you guys get here? I was at your home this morning, but you were already gone.” Spring stayed silent, so Blue rolled her eyes and answered instead “We took the train of course. Canterlot is kinda far to walk, you know?” Twilight giggled, of course, and playfully swatted her wing towards Blue “I know that! What I meant was, why didn’t you wait for me? You could have taken the carriage Princess Celestia sent for me.” Blue just laughed “Yeah right. Me, on a royal carriage? As if.” Princess Twilight giggled again and turned towards Spring Meadow, and her smile froze. The older of the sisters barely even looked conscious. Spring Meadow was just staring straight ahead into nothingness, her eyes were empty and dull. Twilight had seen this before, but never as intense as today. Spring Meadow was always careful, hesitant, and almost suspicious, as she had learned that even the best things could turn bad eventually. However, Twilight had seen a more positive attitude from her during the last weeks. Today however, she saw nothing of this. Spring Meadow looked like there was no hope left, that she couldn't even dare to hope. Before Twilight Sparkle could say anything though, an almost hidden door in the back of the room opened and Princess Luna walked in, followed closely by Princess Celestia. They both took a deep sigh and Princess Celestia muttered under her breath “Budget meetings have to be the worst part of the job. I thought they would never find an end this time.” Blue watched anxiously since the royal princesses didn’t seem in the best of mood, but Celestia’s face brightened up as soon as she saw the platter of cake and Luna caught Blue’s eyes for a quick wink. The two tall alicorns took their seats to greet their guests “Welcome to Canterlot Palace, Spring Meadow and Ocean Shore. Please, help yourself to some snacks.” Both Luna and Twilight giggled when Celestia followed her own invitation and picked up the biggest slice of cake with her magic, and even Blue had a grin despite being nervous. While Celestia was busy, Luna took over and looked at the two humans-turned-ponies in front of her “How are you faring today, my little ponies?” Since Spring Meadow barely even moved, Blue answered for both of them “We’re rather nervous, Princess. It’s, um, we… we have a rather bad record with meetings like this.” It was the truth, but it was still hard for Blue to say it. All her old instincts told her to play stuff down and act tough, but they wouldn’t help her much today, with the way all the princesses had looked right through her ever since they first met, so she stuck with honest, even if it was a little embarrassing. Luna nodded but with a kind smile and Twilight Sparkle tuned in “I can imagine this is very nerve-wrecking for you. There is a lot on the line for both of you, so let me start right away by telling you that you have nothing to worry about.” Blue and Spring both blinked surprised and Blue felt dazed “You mean…?” Princess Twilight nodded with a bright smile “We see no reason why you shouldn’t be allowed to stay in Equestria, if that is what you want.” Blue turned to her sister, smiling as well, but her smile faded when she took in Spring’s expression. Spring Meadow didn’t look happy at all, she looked more like she’d just received a death sentence. Princess Celestia addressed her with her gentle tone “You seem very worried, Spring Meadow. Is something wrong?” Spring blinked and stared at the three tall princesses in front of her “What’s the catch? You could have told us that in your letter. Why did you order us here instead?” Celestia and Luna exchanged a glance “I’m not sure what you mean, Spring Meadow. There is no catch. And as for why we invited you to Canterlot, I believe that it easier to make your new Equestrian citizenship official here than to involve the mayor’s office in Ponyville.” Luna looked directly at Spring Meadow before she added “If that is what you want.” Blue grinned almost manically “Are you kidding? Of course we want, right sis?” She stopped grinning when Spring still didn’t look any less worried “I… I have some questions first, if that’s okay.” Princess Celestia nodded patiently “Of course. We have no intention to withhold any information from you.” Spring chewed on her lower lip “Are we allowed to go back, anytime?” Princess Twilight nodded immediately “Of course! You can access the portal through me at my castle so you can go for a visit to the human world if you like.” “Yes, but… could we go back, for good, if we wanted?” Blue couldn’t believe what she heard and glared at her sister “Why would we? After we worked so hard to fit in here, I don’t want to go back! We’d just run into new problems again.” Spring shook her head “That’s not what I meant. What I want to say is… are we prisoners of this world, now?” Blue and Twilight both looked a little shocked, but Celestia shook her head and Luna explained “We understand what you mean, Spring Meadow, and the answer is no. While we would certainly encourage you to stay here, there is no obligation. Just like Sunset Shimmer could come back to Equestria whenever she wanted, you are free to do the same.” Celestia nodded and added “We’ve seen you change a lot recently, and not only physically. I understand that it was a lot to take in, especially for you Spring Meadow. It is wise that you wish to keep your options open, but you should also think about what is best for you.” Spring sighed deeply and glanced at Blue “Thank you, Your Highness. And I think we’re both happy to stay if you’ll have us.” “Most certainly.” Covered in golden magic, some official looking papers appeared on the table, but Blue stood up and spread her wings “Just a second.” Blue turned around to glare at her sister “You don't want to stay?” Instead of answering, Spring Meadow chewed on her lower lip again and by that told Blue everything “You really don't. But, why?” “Blue, it's not like that, it's just...” “If it's not like that, then why ask something like that?” Spring took a deep breath and turned around to fully face her sister “Blue, bitte versteh doch...” “Nein, ich verstehs eben nicht! Wieso? Wieso ausgerechnet jetzt?” Princess Twilight watched as the two former humans kept talking in their foreign language. They’d done so before while they were staying at her castle, but it hadn’t sounded that harsh before. She had guessed that, back then, they were sharing some private words, which was fine of course, but this time they were locked in a heated discussion. Blue’s voice grew louder and louder, and her wings flared up as she got more and more angry while Spring Meadow could barely meet her sister’s eyes. Twilight glanced nervously at the two other alicorns in the room. Princess Celestia and Princess Luna watched the scene in front of them with practiced calmness and patience. Twilight was sure they, just like her, couldn’t understand a lick of it, but very well read the expression of the former humans. Blue was angry and Spring was worried. Blue was angry, a lot, and not always for good reasons. Twilight knew that Blue had been angry as a human as well and she had talked with Sunset Shimmer about it. They both agreed that it was a coping mechanism. They couldn’t talk about it with Blue though, since she would either play it down, or get angry. Except from the first slip-up, she didn’t threaten ponies or turn to violence anymore, but sometimes, when she was in a bad mood, her snarky remarks could sound meaner than she meant them. Pinkie Pie called it ‘grump-fensive’ and Rainbow Dash’s opinion swayed between ‘jerk’ and ‘hothead’. Despite Blue knowing the girl’s counterparts, or maybe because of it, Blue didn’t get along too well with Twilight’s best friends at times. When they did however, they all agreed that Blue was a reliable friend who tried her best to be helpful and didn’t shy away from hard work or getting dirty. Maybe their friendship wasn’t as deep as between the six of them, but any of the element bearers would put in a good word for Blue when Twilight asked for their opinions. Blue never had a good outlet in the human world, as Sunset had told her, but here in Equestria, Blue had taken the pegasus way for herself and found flying for that purpose. On the weather patrol, she did her part well and then helped the others, which made her some workplace-friends who slowly turned into regular friends as well. When there was no hard work to be done for the weather, Blue also picked up odd jobs here and there, even ones where she couldn’t fly. And sometimes, she would just fly for the heck of it, often for hours. After that, she usually wasn’t angry or grumpy anymore. Spring Meadow was worried a lot, even when she had no reason to be. Spring was thriving in her job in Ponyville Hospital and the doctor sung her praises the last time Princess Twilight had asked about her, but Spring Meadow was never satisfied with her own accomplishments. There was always something that could have gone better, something that might go wrong, something she was afraid she didn’t prepare for properly. Like with Blue’s anger, her worry was a coping mechanism. Unlike Blue, it made Spring withdraw from other ponies. She had fewer friends and spent less time in town with other ponies. She had not picked up any hobbies besides studying and on the few occasions she had visited Princess Twilight in her castle, she had shown phases when she still behaved more like a human than a pony. Spring Meadow struggled far more in that regard than her sister. Spring Meadow had been through a lot of struggle and misery in her life, even though she never told Twilight any specifics. She had learned to never take anything for granted and always assume the worst. Blue had learned that she had to struggle for anything good to happen and that when she wasn’t willing to fight for it, she’d suffer from it. It came down to what Twilight saw right in front of her right now: Spring Meadow worried a lot, mostly about Blue. Blue was angry a lot, mostly when her sister was worried. Seeing Blue angry made Spring worry more, and it just kept going in circles. If this was another friendship problem, Twilight would have a few ideas on how to help. But from her earlier interactions with Spring Meadow and Ocean Shore, she knew it wasn’t that simple. They were sisters at first and not necessarily friends, so some sisterly quarrel was to be expected. However, they had a different intensity to it than Twilight had ever seen between Applejack or Rarity and their younger siblings, or even between Shining Armor and herself. It was hard to tell when they crossed the line between quarrel and downright fighting, especially when you had to consider their human background as well (which Twilight tried, of course). Right now, they were clearly fighting and probably throwing obscenities at each other, in front of Princess Celestia and Princess Luna, who were now throwing looks at her as well. Twilight’s ears flopped down in shame, like always when she felt like she failed her fellow princesses, but a subtle shake of Celestia’s head told her it wasn’t that. The two former humans were still at it, so Celestia leaned over to Twilight so she could ask without being noticed “Does that happen a lot between them?” Twilight shook her head and whispered back “Not like that. I mean they are sisters, and sometimes, um…” She glanced past Celestia at Luna, who nodded in response “Sisters sometimes just argue. I believe we know a thing or two about this.” “Indeed. Perhaps enough to step in now, what do you think, Luna?” “It’s like you read my mind, sister.” Twilight felt the sudden rise of magic moments before a bright flash filled the room. When she opened her eyes again, there was an unnatural silence, as Princess Luna and Princess Celestia had vanished, along with Blue and Spring Meadow. Suddenly feeling exhausted, Twilight let her head sink on the table in front of her “Dear Celestia, what a day.” -*- Spring Meadow didn’t really enjoy being magic-zapped around, especially without any warning. When she got her bearings again, she found that now she was in some kind of garden, or more like a small park. There were some trees for shade and even a small pond. Beds of colourful flowers spread a nice scent and the sun was warm and bright on this wonderful day. The grass she was standing on had to be the softest she'd ever felt under her hooves. Something about this scenery immediately got to her. Here, closer to nature, she felt calmer than she had all day, and definitely calmer than locked up in a small room with three princesses. If she had been alone, she might have just laid down on the grass and enjoyed the peace and quiet of this place. Of course, she wasn't alone, since someone had brought her here. Spring turned around and found Princess Luna watching her, with a feint glow around that big horn of hers, confirming Spring's suspicion that the princess had been the one who had zapped her here. Luna looked at her and before Spring could even move, Luna responded to the question Spring didn't get the chance to ask “Ocean Shore is fine, Spring Meadow. She is with my sister right now, just as you are with me.” Spring nodded, but she didn't really feel relieved by what the princess had told her “So you are interrogating us now, even though you said you had made your decision already.” The princess shook her, with an understanding smile on her muzzle “I can assure you that it is not like this. My sister and I just thought that Ocean Shore and you could use some time to cool down. I didn't understand much of your discussion, but your sister seemed quite angry.” Spring closed her eyes and she felt her ears flop down “That's happening a lot recently. I don't understand why. We... our life here is better in so many ways. Blue finally found the thing she's really good at and she can thrive now, she's so much happier and more relaxed whenever I see her. But as soon as we talk, she gets angry at me. I don't know if it's all the changes, or if it's because of me.” Maybe it was the soothing nature that surrounded her, or Princess Luna's calm presence, but Spring Meadow just poured her heart out at this moment. The older, wiser princess didn't say anything for now and just listened. Unaware that her human counterpart had done the same for Spring Meadow and Ocean Shore in the other world. Back there, Spring often shared her concerns with the woman, concerns she didn't want to share with her little sister, so maybe it just felt right to do the same now, as a pony as well “Maybe it would be better if Blue stayed here with Princess Twilight and I'd go back. She gets along so well with everypony now. If it's me who's getting her angry, maybe I should just leave. Maybe she doesn't need me anymore.” Now that Spring Meadow fell silent, Princess Luna found it the right time to say something “I truly doubt that this is the case, Spring Meadow. Your sister kept telling me that she wanted for you to be happy. She felt guilty as she believes she's the reason you had to endure so many hardships in the human world. She wants you to have a fresh start here, even more than she desires this for herself.” Spring shook her head and frowned angrily “It's not her fault! It's never been her fault! She didn't make us move around all the time. She had such a hard time settling in but every time, I had to pull her out again. Of course, she would be angry! But she's never been angry at me before.” Luna tilted her head and listened attentively. She had not heard much of the two former humans’ past and she was sure that not even Twilight Sparkle or Sunset Shimmer knew any of this, although clearly, it's had to be on the young mare's mind “Spring Meadow, if Ocean Shore has never been angry at you, what makes you think she is now? Perhaps she's angry at something else entirely.” “Then, why is she yelling at me? I keep asking her if something is wrong, but she keeps exploding into my face. I'm just worried that something is troubling her, but she won't tell me.” Spring's frown grew deeper, but the mare next to her stifled a giggle behind her hoof. At some point, Princess Luna had chosen to sit down on the soft grass, and reluctantly, Spring followed her example. She wasn't angry that the princess found humour in her worries, she was more confused than anything, so Princess Luna tried to explain “You sounded very much like my own sister right now. She's also often concerned about my well-being, even though both of us are hundreds of years old.” Spring joined in the little giggle from Luna this time, but the alicorn princess sighed softly soon after “It annoys me at times. Sometimes, it seems like I will never grow up in her eyes. To her, I will always be a helpless filly.” At this, Spring looked away and recalled the last couple times she and Blue had talked. Now that she thought about it, she had been asking Blue about her troubles a lot. Almost every time. She was just trying to take care of her. In the human world, Spring had to work double-shifts and night shifts and weekend shifts and left Blue to deal with a lot of stuff on her own. Blue couldn’t cook, but she usually ended up doing all the shopping. When there was trouble at school, Blue had to handle it by herself. Spring simply never had the time to get involved, because there was always a rent to pay or bills reminding her that she couldn’t slack off on work. She would have asked all those questions back then, but now that she had free time for a change, she actually did it. Blue knew she was only taking care of her, right? Blue had to know that Spring only wanted to be there for her now, after so many years when she couldn’t. She didn’t think that Blue was helpless or looking for trouble or anything. Princess Luna watched her closely and Spring got that eery feeling again that Luna could see more than just her expression. Almost as if to proof it, Luna just talked like she had heard everything Spring had been thinking “Blue is neither helpless nor weak. But did you ever tell her you know that?” “No. At least, not clearly enough apparently. I just want her to know I’m here for her. I want to make up for all the times I couldn’t do that.” Luna nodded calmly “I understand. But your sister isn’t used to this and she’s quick to second-guess ponies’ intentions when they do something she doesn’t understand right away.” Spring Meadow sighed and slumped down into the grass which felt far more comfortable than she deserved right now “I really need to talk with her about all that…” “Perhaps. But, not now. As a little sister, I know how it feels to get smothered by an older sibling. And to be fair, you look like you could use some rest just as much.” Spring Meadow just nodded along. She felt like she just had to close her eyes and she would go to sleep right now, with the soft grass under her and the little sounds of nature around her. Even the scent of the flowers helped her feel more at ease, so much that even talking to a princess couldn’t shake her right now. Princess Luna seemed to know, because she didn’t say anything for a while and just sat down next to her. For a few minutes, they just passed in comfortable silence. In the end, Spring Meadow felt the need to say something, not that the silence bothered her, but it seemed polite “I’ve never been abducted before, but at least you picked a nice place.” Next to her, Princess Luna just chuckled with a smile “It is one of my favourite places in the royal gardens. I guess it appeals to my earth pony side, just like it does to yours.” Spring Meadow sat up, just a little, so she could look at Luna “Is that what’s happening? I always thought it was strange that a walk through the park would always cheer me up.” Luna nodded and explained “It is not unusual for earth ponies to have a greater affinity to nature. Some are energized by it, but it seems for you it has a calming effect. Maybe because that is something you have been missing for a while now?” Spring didn’t mind that Luna’s question was a bit too personal, she was far too calm to let it bother her right now “In the other world, there was always work, bills to pay and all that. And here, we had to find a place to stay, I had so much to catch up on my job and studying. I barely got a chance to stop and take a breath.” “Then this is something you should change, be it in your original world or this one. It’s good to be active, but everypony needs some quiet time for themselves every now and then.” Spring nodded and rested her head on her hooves “That sounds really nice, right now.” Princess Luna just smiled “Then rest now, Spring Meadow. And when you feel ready, I’ll take you back to our respective sisters.” Spring nodded again and closed her eyes. She didn’t fall asleep as she had feared, but she just soaked in the calmness of the place for a while. She knew she couldn’t stay hidden forever, but just for now, she allowed herself to enjoy this moment. When the light faded, Blue suddenly stood on a cloud. Thanks to her work in the weather patrol, this didn’t feel strange anymore, but it was certainly weird that she was suddenly this high up. Even Canterlot and the palace looked small from up here. She glanced around and found Princess Celestia sitting on the same cloud in a polite distance. She looked at Blue probingly, as if to see how angry Blue still was. And Blue still was angry, she wasn’t going to deny that, but she wasn’t angry at the princess, or the fact that she had been brought here without much of a warning. She was still angry at Spring Meadow and there was still an edge in her voice “Why does she keep doing this? She’s treating me like a baby all the time. Like nothing I do is ever good enough for her.” The princess took Blue’s outburst in stride “That sounds awfully familiar, my little pony. Why do you think she’s doing this?” Instead of calming down, Blue started paced up and down on the cloud and her wings flapped angrily “Because she thinks I can’t do anything right. She thinks everything I do I will mess up unless she’s breathing down my neck. She never bothered keeping tabs on me when I got in trouble at school, so why can’t she just let me do my thing now?” “So, you think that your sister doesn’t trust you?” Celestia asked calmly, but to Blue, the words hit her like a brick. Was that it? Spring didn’t trust her after all? Blue stopped pacing, and her wings folded back to her sides. At home, in their kitchen, they had a box hidden in the back of one of the cupboards. They kept all their bits in there, and Blue knew it. In the other world, money was always short, and Spring Meadow had kept close tabs on every dollar and cent they spent. She had never even asked Blue if she wanted her own student’s bank account. Here in Equestria, that changed. Blue was involved with every decision and Spring didn’t keep her out of the loop. The money box was just one of many little things that changed. “No. I’m sure she trusts me. But, I don’t know why she thinks I’ll just keep messing everything up.” “Has she ever said that she does?” Blue turned around and stared at Princess Celestia. Usually, this was the point where she would start to argue, but Celestia had no challenge in her voice whatsoever, and her expression was neutral and calm. It didn’t make any sense. “Why are you asking this?” Celestia let out a small sigh and turned her head to look at the palace down below “As an older sister, you never stop worrying about your little sister. You see her grow up, watch how she grows strong and independent, and you’re proud of course. But you still feel responsible, and you still try to help, because that’s what a big sister should do. And then you learn that all your effort is not always appreciated. But of course, you don’t stop helping, you just try harder instead. You’re the older sister and you need take care of your little sister. Of course there’s some bickering along the way, every sibling knows quarrels like these. It’s nothing to worry about, just a little bit that’s left from the filly you’ve seen grow up. You’re the bigger sister, you should look past some harsh or mean words. Even if the bickering starts to turn into arguing. Until, suddenly, everything you say, in best intention to help of course, is taken as a challenge by your little sister. After some time, she just talks to you less and less, and when you talk, you only try to help, but she won’t accept it, so you stay quiet. Then, out of nowhere it seems, the first fight happens. You’re shocked of course, how could the sister you love so much say these things or even attack you? And suddenly, this fight is more than just a fight between sisters. Suddenly, the fate of a whole nation depends on the outcome of a fight with your own sister. And suddenly, you’re forced to do a terrible thing, you’re forced to hurt your sister, even if it is the last thing you ever wanted to do. Then everything is over and your little sister, the one you love more than everypony else, is gone. You’ve never felt so alone ever before. And suddenly, as the world around you goes quiet, you realize something. All those times you talked, all the times you tried to help and do the right thing, all those words you said… but you never once told your little sister how much you love her, and how proud you are of the pony she has become.” Celestia fell silent, still watching the palace in a distance, but something in the way she sat had changed. To Blue, it looked like the princess had just grown ten years older in the blink of an eye. Blue was unsure on how to react. She hadn’t expected a speech like this from Princess Celestia and she clearly hadn’t expected that a simple story could make her feel so conflicted. But that was the whole point, she realized. The story wasn’t all that simple. Princess Celestia didn’t say anything, but Blue felt like she had to, if she wanted to understand. So Blue sat down on the cloud as well, in some distance still but closer than before, and spoke up in an unusual shy voice “Is that what happened between you and Princess Luna?” Celestia nodded, followed by her calm voice “It didn’t happen all at once, in fact it took years to reach the boiling point. We were young still, but we were princesses, and we had the task to build up a nation and protect it. I buried myself in diplomacy and bureaucracy, but that meant I had little time for anything else. Since Luna rules over the night and I work at day, we only met twice a day for a few short moments. And when we met, we talked about the kingdom, our ponies, our duties… but very rarely did I give Luna the chance to talk about herself.” Celestia turned away from the city so she could look at Blue now “I know if you were to ask Luna, she would blame everything that happened on herself. She’s convinced that her actions led only to catastrophe and hate, and that she shouldn’t be forgiven. I think you might know a thing or two about how this might feel.” Blue looked away for a moment, and her wings twitched. She had gotten into so many troubles before, that even now in Equestria, it was normal for her to blame herself on everything that went wrong. And every time Spring Meadow asked about her days, she couldn’t help but feel like her sister was just trying to find something she’d done wrong, again. It’s what made her so angry. Princess Celestia didn’t push any further as Blue sorted out her thoughts. She waited for a few minutes before she continued “Truth is though, Luna is not to blame. She did some bad things in the end and she even attacked me, but I know today that I could have prevented it months, if not years, in advance. If I had been more attentive to her feelings or if I had been more open with mine…” Celestia didn’t finish that thought and ended in a deep sigh instead “A big sister never stops feeling responsible. Especially when she’s so used that ponies rely on her so much. But because of that, sometimes, many times in fact, we are terrible at showing how we really feel.” Blue nodded and stared ahead into the open sky. The last few times Spring had tried to talk to her came to her mind, and how she had blown up on her. Celestia said Luna blamed herself, when really, she was to blame. But when Blue mulled it over in her head, that didn’t feel right either. It’s not one side or the other, really. It’s both of us that messed up. “Did things work out again between you and Luna?” Celestia nodded, but her smile seemed a bit forced “They did, but it took a lot of effort from both of us. We talk more and try to share more time together. I’m trying not to hover over Luna as much and I don’t double-check her work, even if I want to.” Blue couldn’t help but giggle at this. From what she had heard from Sunset Shimmer, Princess Celestia had a knack for micro-managing everything and everypony around her from the background. To an extend she was even trying to do so with Spring Meadow and her right now. “I guess I’ll need to talk more to Spring then. Emphasis on ‘talk’ and not yell.” Princess Celestia joined in for a giggle this time, even though she still didn’t carry that smile “Your sister and you have to make a difficult decision about your future. Make sure you take all the time you need for that.” Blue shook her head at that “I don’t think it’s much to decide. I want to stay, and I think Spring wants to stay too. We just need to tell each other that it’s for the right reasons.” Princess Celestia now smiled, and Blue knew that kind of smile very well. She’s seen it from her sister when she went through with a plan, or with Twilight Sparkle when she was checking off something from one of her many checklists “You’ve been planning this all along, haven’t you?” If Celestia was surprised that Blue had figured her out, she didn’t show it “We had intentions to talk with each of you, yes. But I didn’t expect the… let’s call it explosive start. In any way, I’m glad we got to speak some more, although I must admit, it was not only for your sake alone.” Blue looked up at that last comment and something clicked. Celestia had been surprisingly open to Blue about her relationship with her sister. And still, there was something that seemed to weigh on her mind. If that thing was something she wanted to talk about with Blue, it wasn’t really a leap of thought on what she really wanted, at least not for Blue “You want to ask me about Sunset, right?” This time, Celestia looked surprised, but Blue only shrugged. She wasn’t the cleverest girl (or pony), but even she could figure things out. Because of that, Celestia decided to not hide her intentions any longer “I do, very much so. I’ve been talking with her, but only a couple of minutes on the few times she visited, and Twilight Sparkle told me about some events, but you spent more time with her than she has. I hope you can help me understand Sunset better.” Blue tilted her head, which was the pony-equivalent of a shrug “She’s been your student for years, what could I tell you that you don’t already know?” “Sunset Shimmer has changed a lot since she left my tutelage, for the better as far as I can tell. But both you and Sunset have chosen another world over the realm that was your home. This is something I can’t really wrap my head around.” Blue laughed a little, but it wasn’t bitter as it had been three months ago “I suppose that’s something we have in common.” “And there is one more thing.” Something about Celestia’s tone made Blue look back at her and for the first time, the calm demeanour of the princess showed some cracks “Twilight Sparkle and even Sunset herself told me many things, but they only talk about the positive things that happened. I think they might believe they still have to convince me that Sunset had changed into a better pony, although I know this very well and of course I’m very proud of her.” Blue couldn’t help but think that this talk about Sunset Shimmer sounded a lot like what she heard about Princess Luna before, but the next thing Celestia said forced her attention back to the here and now “I am aware that life isn’t always easy and good. And I am aware that Sunset fell on hard times, but neither Twilight Sparkle nor Sunset Shimmer are willing to talk about this with me. I can understand their reasons and I won’t force them, or you, but I can’t deny that I wish I knew… that I could understand why… how it had come so far that Sunset… Sunset thought she…” Princess Celestia started mincing words and Blue immediately knew what this was about. Maybe it wasn’t the most tactful thing to say, but if Blue would talk about this, she’d do it her way “You want to know why Sunset tried to kill herself.” Unsurprisingly, Celestia flinched when Blue hit right on the spot, and she seemed very uneasy “I wouldn’t have said it like that…” “But that’s what happened.” Blue knew that there was probably some kind of rule about interrupting a princess, but right now she couldn’t care about something like this “Sunset tried to kill herself. It’s a fact. You don’t like it, neither do I. But you can’t just pretend it didn’t happen if you don’t say it out loud. If you respect Sunset in any way, you have to accept that. Don’t sugar-coat it, but don’t blow it out of proportion either. If you really care about Sunset, you owe her that much.” Princess Celestia stared at her for a moment longer as Blue waited for the message to sink in. When it did, Celestia didn’t look any less troubled, but more determined than before “I would like to hear about it, so I can better understand Sunset.” Blue frowned immediately “I can’t tell you why she did it. That’s a talk you need to have with Sunset. I can only tell you what happened before, and after. I don’t claim I understand Sunset when it comes to that.” Again, the princess nodded, and she seemed as serious about this as Blue “Anything you’re willing to tell me, I’m willing to hear, Ocean Shore.” Blue sighed and sat back down on the cloud. Oh boy, there’s my full name. Here we go again. “Fair warning, I will get angry talking about this.” “I understand. Please continue.” With no more reason to stall anything, Blue just dived right in. The sun had passed its zenith when Princess Celestia and Princess Luna suddenly reappeared next to Twilight Sparkle. After the youngest of the three princesses had been talked out of near-panic and informed that everything was going as planned, Twilight had moved into a small, private library that Celestia’s assistant had wisely prepared for her. With a good book, she was calm enough to spend a few hours waiting, even if she didn’t like the fact that Princess Celestia had kept her out of the loop once again. She was also still worried about her two friends, but of course she trusted Celestia and Luna enough to know that the former humans would be in good hooves. Though it wasn’t very reassuring that they had reappeared without Spring Meadow and Blue “Is everything alright?” Princess Luna nodded and Princess Celestia even had a little smile “I believe so. We gave them a chance to vent and offered some perspective. I’m sure they’ll make their decision soon.” Twilight followed the other two princesses back towards the meeting room, both relieved and annoyed “Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate all your help and I’m glad Spring Meadow and Ocean Shore are well, but next time you plan something like this, would it be too much to ask if you just told me in advance? I spent all morning worrying when you two obviously had planed this from the start.” Luna threw a glance at her sister, who now had the grace to blush a bit, much to Twilight’s surprise “We, um, that is I, that is… Luna and I had intended to talk with Spring Meadow and Ocean Shore, individually, yes. But I assure you, we have not anticipated their fight, or that it would turn out like this. I know it may look like it, but I promise I didn’t plan this over your head by intention, Twilight.” Luna didn’t say anything, but she nodded, and they both seemed sincere, so Twilight could easily let her annoyance go “I understand. So, um, what did you talk about? Anything I should know?” Celestia blushed again, but this time Luna came to her sister’s aid “We merely gave them some perspective, from one sister to another. And hopefully it was what they needed to clear out the air between them. At least it looks like they did.” Twilight looked up and saw what Luna was pointing at. Spring Meadow and Ocean Shore were sitting in the meeting room again, and they were talking. Actually talking, not yelling, and they were looking at each other. Twilight couldn’t hear what they were saying, and she almost expected they were talking their own language again, but she could see the difference. Spring Meadow had moved to one of the windows and seemed relaxed now, splitting her attention between the nice scenery and her sister. Blue was still at the table but lounged more casually than before. Her wings twitched and flapped every now and then, but not from anger. Blue just didn’t like sitting still for a long period of time, so she was fidgeting a bit. Blue didn’t look angry at all and she smiled at something her sister told her, right before the three princesses joined them once more. They both sat up straight, but not as intimidated as they had been earlier this morning. Princess Celestia shared a glance with Twilight and Luna, and since they were both nodding in agreement, she was the one who addressed the two former humans “Well then, Spring Meadow and Ocean Shore. Have you made your decision?” Spring and Blue exchanged one final look, before Blue replied for them “We have.”