Katrina quietly lifted the trapdoor and climbed up into her closet, listening carefully to see if whoever was in her home was nearby. She sneaked up and out, following the sounds of people talking and taking a peek into her living room when she finally saw who it was.
“Jase!” she suddenly yelled as her little brother jumped in surprise. “What do you think you’re doing here?”
“Oh, hi Mark,” Jase responded casually as he settled back into the couch and turned back to the TV that was on, looking quite sweaty. “Funny thing about that is that you left your door unlocked. And by unlocked, I mean you still haven’t changed the password to your keypad. I was knocking for a minute until I got fed up and let myself in. Basically what I’m saying is that it’s your fault I’m inside.”
Katrina blinked and took a breath before she responded, “I was a second away from just getting my phone and calling the police. You can’t just keep walking in whenever you want. You do realize this is a felony, right? I could send you to jail.”
“Like I said, I was knocking. You never answered, and I didn’t hear anyone, so… speaking of which, where were you? I know you were home because your car’s still out front.”
“I- that doesn’t matter,” she told him. “What do you think you’re doing here breaking into my house?”
“That part is less funny,” he started, rubbing a hand behind his head as he smiled sheepishly. “Turns out Dad really doesn’t like it when you’re twenty-two and are still living with him and don’t have a job, so… he might have kind of kicked me out.”
“And Mom lives in a one room condo, Sam’s in Georgia with her boyfriend, and Trent just doesn’t care, does he? Which means you have to just break in to my house, doesn’t it?”
“Trent did say he would let me stay with him if I had seven hundred dollars a month for rent and paid a deposit, too. His exact words were that if I, and I quote, ‘want that fucking freeloading pity bullshit, go see your other brother and bother him’, which I think is in essence what Dad told me, too, except much more politely. So uh, here I am.”
“How in the world is all of this happening?” Katrina couldn’t help but ask herself as she closed her eyes and shook her head in disbelief. “Of course he wants to move in with me a few months after that worldgate gets built. I’m never going to be able to see Twilight…”
“I doubt those were his exact words, but you’re lucky I’m so nice,” she replied grumpily after a moment of consideration. “But you do have to get a job. I don’t want you sitting around all day doing nothing. And this is temporary. We’re not going to do this for more than a year at most. Also, do not come into my house like that again. I will call the police if you do that again.” She mostly said those things so she could make sure there was a time when he’d be out of the house so she could go to Equestria. She wanted to support her brother but she absolutely didn’t want to give up her relief.
“Awwwww, you’re the best brother,” Jase smiled. “Trent’s got nothing on you. Also, I think you mean our house now?”
“Don’t push me,” Katrina threatened. “I’m not in the mood for it right now, especially since you think it’s okay to just walk in and start watching TV. I just about had a heart attack a minute ago.”
“I’m sorry. I really do appreciate it,” he told her genuinely. “Thank you. It means a lot.”
“Well… I guess,” she mumbled. “You’re welcome. You’re lucky I’m such a nice person. You really should’ve called first, though.”
“I did call,” he explained. “Like seven times. And texted you, too. You just didn’t pick up and never responded, so I kind of got desperate and walked over.”
“Wait, you walked here?” she asked seriously. “From Dad’s house? It’s like six miles! How did you get your stuff here?”
“It is very far, and it’s hot as crap outside, which is another reason why I got tired from standing outside so long knocking on the door. Also, I did not get my stuff here. It’s all still at Dad’s house. Um… do you wanna help me get it?” Jase said it and gave her the widest smile he could, trying to convince her.
She couldn’t help but roll her eyes at that. “Let’s go, I guess. Let me go get a hoodie first.”
“I know it’s supposed to be September, but it’s like ninety-five degrees out there, Mark,” Jase told her. “Why are you going to get one?”
“Because I’m an adult who can do what he wants,” she replied, barely stopping herself before she could use female pronouns on herself. She picked one out at random from her closet, making a note to have a lock placed on the door in the future to stop her brother from wandering in accidentally.
“Fine, but when you get heat stroke from being in that thing, don’t say I didn’t warn you,” he told her as she lifted it on. “Also, you should really cut your hair,” he added. “How do you manage all of that? Especially in the summer. It’s like halfway down your back. You’re gonna die the second you walk out there.”
Katrina didn’t comment on that, instead pushing her hair out of her face and heading out to her car, her brother following behind her and making his way into the passenger seat.
It was only a few minutes before the two were pulling up in the house they grew up in, Katrina frowning at the sight of it. She couldn’t really say she had fond memories of living here. She had hardly stepped foot inside in years since she left, maybe only a few times a year since she moved out. It just made her feel too bad to do. She didn’t waste time dwelling on that though, immediately hopping out and getting right to work getting her brother’s stuff loaded up. Her father had the front door open when the two pulled up, clearly expecting to see them.
“Remember to lift with your knees, Mark,” her father said from the living room couch as he watched the two of them work. “I don’t want to have to call an ambulance and tell them my son threw out his back doing something stupid, especially since you came here with a jacket and that mop on your head.”
“I know what I’m doing, Dad,” she replied. “I’m not as stupid as you think I am. I’m twenty-six years old. I know how to lift furniture.” She resisted the urge to add in that he wasn’t even helping them.
“I’m trying to help you out, son. Why do you always have to talk back to me? Every fucking time I tell you something, all I get is back talk, even now. I don’t know how I put up with you for eighteen years.”
She let out a frustrated sigh at that. “Ugh, I’m not back talking, I’m just saying that I know what I’m doing.”
“I don’t know how I put up with you for one hour,” she thought to herself as she worked.
“I am glad to see your brother doing some work for the first time in his life,” he continued, moving to look at Jase now. “A little hard work will put some muscle on you, Jason. You definitely need it.”
“Haha, I guess I do, don’t I?” he answered much more cheerfully than Katrina had. “Maybe I could get a job at Walmart while I live with Mark. That should help give me some money and muscle, too, I think. I’m gonna show up here for Christmas dinner completely ripped.”
“A good job, something physical, that would be good for you, Jason. Not that sitting in bed on your laptop all day crap like Mark does. Gives him a fricken attitude, I’ll say that much. He did that same shit when he was living here as a teenager, remember? He hasn’t had a day’s work in his life.”
“That’s easy to say while you sit and watch us from the couch, Dad,” Katrina now couldn’t help but reply, a scowl now firmly planted on her face. She didn’t want to think about all the days she didn’t leave her room when she was a teenager because she felt so bad.
“You can help us if you want, you know,” she added. “It’s not like it’s an easy job.”
“I’m almost sixty years old, Mark, and have been working hard all of those years. You’re a strong young man. You don’t need an old man like me to help you. Just remember to lift with your knees. And seriously, you need to cut all that hair off. It looks like a wig. It’s embarrassing.”
“You say that every single time I see you,” she snapped, “and I give you the same response every single time. It’s never getting cut, so stop asking.” She did all she could to not yell and curse in the final part of her statement.
“You don’t need to always fucking back talk to me. I was just saying.”
“And I’m just saying you don’t have to tell me every single time I come over. We’ve had this conversation before. I don’t need to hear that you hate how I look every time I see you.”
Her father shook his head. “Always this with you, Mark,” he said. “When are you gonna fricken grow up? You make everything into such a big deal. Can’t even say one thing without having you yell at me.”
Katrina rolled her eyes hard as he said it, thankful her back was to him and he couldn’t see.
Slowly but surely, Jase and Katrina emptied the place of her brother’s stuff, their father sitting by idly from then on, watching as the two worked and not making more than the occasional comment. She didn’t really have much to say anyway, doing her best to clear her mind and focus on work as they passed through several rooms. She didn’t like being here, and wanted to be done and gone as quickly as possible.
It wasn’t her family. They were mostly fine in her opinion, even if they did have a few problems. Well, more than a few problems for some of them, namely her father, but that wasn’t the issue. It was the memory of how she felt that hurt her. The days where she would just stay in her room and not go out, even less than she did already. The fact that she would hardly speak to anyone at school. The times where she got upset about having to take family pictures, where she silently cried in her room over having to have her hair cut whenever her parents felt necessary.
And the memory of not knowing what was wrong with her, why little things about herself upset her so much, why she couldn’t once look in the mirror and like who she saw. As much as she didn’t want to acknowledge that she was trans, more than that she hated that old feeling of not knowing why she disliked herself so much. She couldn’t stand it at all.
“It would’ve been better had I not been completely stupid, seeing how obvious it was,” she thought to herself. As far as she knew, most boys didn’t sneak into their sister’s closet when they weren't around to try on their clothes, or had trouble connecting with other men, or felt jealous that they couldn’t have a woman’s puberty. How she never put those things together when she lived here, she didn’t know. Maybe things would be different if she had.
She closed her eyes and sighed for a moment, unable to avoid taking in the intensity of the building she was in. She only let herself dwell on it for a moment though before getting back to business, slowly moving Jase’s stuff out of their father’s house.
“Is this the last piece of furniture?” she asked as she lifted a mattress down the stairs and placed it on top of her car, tying it up. “Is there anything else we need?”
“Nope, that’s it,” Jase replied, leaning on her car for a second as her clothes soaked in sweat. “Huh. That was much easier than I would’ve imagined.”
“Painless,” she replied casually, wiping her forehead before hopping back in and getting behind the wheel.
Before they knew it, the two were back at her house, unloading everything from her car and placing it into the living room. It was about an hour and a half total of time spent getting everything, and when they were done, Katrina flopped down on the couch tiredly.
“That was horrible,” she said firmly as she closed her eyes. “Don’t move anything yet though. I need a minute to rest, and then some time to take a shower while I try not to die looking at myself.”
“Okie dokie,” Jase replied, sitting in front of her as he turned the TV back on. “I’ll be here until then.”
Katrina took a relieved sigh, resting for a minute before opening her eyes and realizing what she said. “What is wrong with me?” she thought as she got up, doing her best to remain casual as she headed to the shower. “How could I just slip up like that? I might as well have just said it outright. What in the world is wrong with me?”
She made a point to stop by her room to close and lock her laptop before heading into the bathroom. She turned on the water and let it run over her skin, closing her eyes. She hardly ever took long showers, but right then, she wanted to stand under the water all night. It was reliving in contrast to the events of her day up to that point.
“Why does Jase have to be here?” she whispered to herself as she stood. “Why is all of this happening? This isn’t fair…”
She would have to find a way to somehow tell Twilight she wouldn’t be able to see her for a while. Maybe she would go early in the morning before she went to sleep, right after she got off of work. She didn’t want the mare to be worried about her.
She stood for a while under the water before she started to hear the sound of her brother grunting coming from outside, clearly moving his stuff around when she told him not to. It made her groan in frustration to hear, and she finally got out the body wash and shampoo to prepare to leave the shower.
“Hey, Mark!” Jase suddenly called as she stepped out to dry herself off. “I have a question!” Katrina rolled her eyes and shook her wet hair for a second before getting dressed to see what he wanted.
“I told you not to start moving stuff around, and you…” she trailed off, stopping short as she just about had a heart attack at what she saw.
“What is this doing here?” her brother asked as he held up her dress.