Dear Journal,
I've been regretting so much recently. Everything, from the biggest mistakes I've made to all the times I've humiliated myself. I'm regretting it all.
Why did I have to kick that pebble on the sidewalk that hit that dog in the face?
Why did I act so stupid when I needed to think quickly?
Why was I such a bad roommate?
Why was I such a horrible friend?
Why couldn't I get my life together?
Everything's wrong. Nothing's right. It all feels like a lie. Like a house of cards that's about to topple.
How can I keep standing if I doubt everything I've ever done?
I hate this. I hate all of this.
I'm so done with all of this. I'm on my own.
I... I feel like I'm drowning, but no one around me is noticing. They're all expecting me to be the same old Rainbow. The awesome athlete who is 20% cooler at everything that anyone else.
But I'm dying slowly and no one seems to notice.
Or care.
Fuck, I regret so much of my life.
I don't think I've ever been able to do anything right.