“Toothbrush?” Astral asked, the other Thestral grinning with a roll of her eyes.
“A figurative question. I said I didn’t know you that well. I’m literally unable to run from you telling me your life’s story. Not that you need to, but may as well at least learn a bit about the stallion I’ve saved.”
“Twice. Or more.”
“Twice or more. And now saved my life. Hmm. How about I ask a question, then you do?” she suggested, a bit of pleading leaking into her gaze. “Astral, if I can be honest with you, I’m really trying to stay distracted from my current situation. Not being able to move right now is disturbing on a level I don’t want to elaborate on. I have more hooves than the times I’ve had to rely on someone to this extent, none of them good.”
“It’s alright, Sassi. Hmm, favorite food?”
“You’re asking this to the mare who has a smoothie every day.”
“More like every few hours, but point taken.”
Sassi’s indignant glare was enough to make Astral smirk, but the playfulness dancing behind her eyes muted any genuine annoyance.
“But aside from smoothies?”
“Ooooh. Grilled fruit with a pile of hayfries on the side. Yours?”
“I can’t top that,” he admitted, “but fruit pastries are a weakness of mine. Hayfries are amazing though. Just wait till you try the garlic ones.”
“I need that in my life. Like, immediately,” Sassi said with a groan, “and my stomach.”
“Well, as soon as we get out of here, I’ll take you to the best place that sells them,” Astral said firmly. The look in Sassi’s eyes threw him off. It was…hopeful? Unsure?
Does she think I’m joking?
“Well, my turn then,” she said. “What’s your favorite hobby? Cutie mark purpose works too.”
“Stargazing,” he replied immediately, “that, and learning about weapons. Not sure why that isn’t my cutie mark. But the stars take the lead.”
“Stargazing?”
“Well, that and just, space,” Astral sighed, “the stars, the constellations, how small we are. What things are out there, how space works…everything! I just find it so cool! There are no ponies in space yet, but plenty of automated golems have been sent up into orbit!” he waved his hooves excitedly, then settling down on seeing an amusing smile on Sassi’s face. “So…yeah. Put me next to a telescope and I won’t move for hours on end. You?”
Sassi seemed like she was about to say something, then decided against it.
“Well, for me, working security has been my life,” she admitted, “but while I like it, I just want to explore. Visit all the crazy places in the world. Biggest waterfall, somewhere deep in a forest nobody has visited, that sort of thing. Hence the compass part of my cutie mark I guess.”
“That sounds like a ton of fun, honestly,” he admitted, “considering you could take on a Bugbear, you wouldn’t have to worry about much in the wilderness.”
Sassi’s eyes lit up at that, the mare grinning.
“That is a good point,” she mused, eyes looking over to him. “Ok, my turn. Current special somepony waiting for you? Or rocking the bachelor life?”
Astral stared at her, Sassi matching his gaze.
“What? Oh, come on, I was going to ask eventually," she sighed, “you can’t make a ‘poking’ joke and not expect me to wonder if I’m going to get slapped by some crazy mare on escaping this place,” she then paused, “or stallion. Whatever.”
“Ok, that’s fair enough,” he sighed, “Well, definitely mares for me, but certainly none are going to slap you. The whole legal case fried any chances I had for a while. So, I haven’t gotten out much in the past while. I wanted to change that, meet some creatures, but then, well,” he said, gesturing around them. “This happened.”
“That stinks.”
“To say the least. But hey, after all this is over, the least scary thing will be meeting new ponies. So that’s a silver lining. No more social anxiety!”
Sassi smirked at that.
“Well, my answer is pretty obvious. My apartment only has a guest room that was only used by my dad when he had to stay here for a while. So, I was just living the single mare life…with my dad occasionally visiting. Woohoo,” Sassi said, the roll of her eyes meant to be humorous, but Astral picked up a bit deeper of a regretful tone to her voice. “Considering most of the ponies here were lousy creatures, or were married, had a marefriend, or both, my options were nill.”
“Wait. Married, and marefriend? I assume neither of those knew about the other.”
She stuck out her tongue in disgust.
“Bingo. One above ground, one below.”
“Urg! That’s slimy,” Astral said with a revolted expression.
“I know, right?!” Sassi replied with a relieved sigh, “seriously, soooo many saw no problem with it! Flask had to work hard to teach me that what was considered normal down here was not normal in the rest of the world. Or rather, the right thing to do. Giving me an idea of what morals were in a place that actively worked against having such things,” her expression grew a bit downcast at that. “But yeah. I certainly didn’t want to do anything serious with any of the creatures here. Even finding a friend was hard, they came and went.”
“I’m surprised you didn’t get more offers of any sort, no offense,” Astral mused, Sassi huffing at that. Once again, a bit of confusion shone behind her gaze despite her next words being rather matter-of-fact.
“Well, there’s a reason for that. As I grew up there were rather…unpleasant comments,” she admitted. “When the vast majority of creatures here are guys, the treatment towards the girls wasn’t exactly stellar. So, my choices were basically different flavors of garbage. It all came to a head when one guy did try to put his hooves where they didn’t belong. Once word spread around that I broke his nose, dislocated both his forelimbs and left him in an elevator bleeding everywhere, they left me alone.”
“You can be a bit scary at times, Sassi,” Astral said, “but if it worked, it worked. I can’t imagine how rough it must have been growing up in a place like this.”
“It…yeah,” her words trailed off, eyes drifting to the floor. “Not the best conversation to lift spirits.”
“Hmm. Well, what would be the perfect date?”
Her ears perked up at that, genuine surprise as Astral shrugged.
“Hey, you asked about having a special somepony.”
A weak smile slid onto Sassi’s features, her ears now starting to flatten.
“Can I take a mulligan on that one? I’ll get back to you on it,” she said, not meeting Astral’s gaze. He winced. It was clearly a sore subject for whatever reason.
“Fair enough. How about your favorite firearm? Or weapon. Obviously, you have used a lot more than I have.”
That made Sassi’s eyes light up, the mare letting out a hum.
“Well, that depends!” she said happily. “Are we talking closerange, medium range? Long-range? All around? I have different favorites for each. Close range? Shotgun side-saddle. For sure. Medium range, that flechette grenade launcher turns things...”
Astra’s vision turned a bit warm and fuzzy, and he was fairly certain a few pink hearts were leaking out of his ears.
“Uh, Astral?”
The stallion’s face flushed, hoping the stars in front of his eyes hadn’t been visible.
“Uh-huh?” he replied, Sassi looking at him curiously.
“You zoned out there, or something.”
Judging from the slight blush on her face, Sassi had a slight idea of what Astral’s stupor had been about.
“Uh, yeah. Sorry. Just…” he couldn’t meet her gaze, abruptly finding a nearby shelf fascinating. “It’s nice to find somepony who shares a passion of mine. Usually, it gets weird looks.”
Her expression relaxed, Sassi grinning widely.
“Oh? You said you were i-interested in that stuff, b-but I didn’t…know…” her voice drifted off, violet eyes widening as her limbs began to shake.
“A-astral?” Sassi asked, a bit of fear now injecting itself into her voice, “can you take another measurement p-please?”
Immediately doing so, Astral frowned on seeing the number.
“Eight percent. Well, time to get another shot,” he muttered, digging out the two syringes. “Ok, Green is the antigen, Purple is the booster. Booster before the antigen,” the stallion reiterated to himself, having read the instructions on them extensively in the downtime previously. The armored mare was quiet, her eyes focused off in the distance.
“Sorry, hope this doesn’t hurt too much,” he said softly, injecting them into the armor port. Sassi’s limbs slowly began to stop quivering, the mare’s eyes slowly refocusing. He set the medical supplies aside, noting how they didn’t have any more injections left.
“Hmm. I guess we’ll have to find more,” Astral said, then turning to Sassi and walking over, “well, in the meantime we can-”
His voice cut off, a ball of lead abruptly forming in his stomach. As her eyes had cleared, Sassi glanced around, her gaze settling on Astral. On not being able to move, the mare’s eyes widened in a very familiar emotion.
And then it was gone, Astral not saying anything as Sassi looked away in utter shame, the mare immediately realizing that he had understood what had been shining in her eyes.
Fear.
Astral couldn’t lift his gaze, head feeling like it weighed as much as an anvil. Seeing a mare like Sassi look at him in blatant fear, assuming his innocence was a lie…
It hurt. Astral knew it was logical on her part but that didn’t blunt the pain for a second.
“There is something I didn’t tell you about the charges against me,” he said softly, “the worst part of it all. Worse than the slander, the lies. I could understand that. Just bad ponies and fanatic parents. The worst of it was how that mare looked at me afterward. How everyone did.”
Sassi didn’t say anything, Astral feeling a few hot tears well up in his green eyes.
“She looked at me just like that. Afraid. She was afraid of the Thestral who beat two stallions into a pool of their own blood. After the trial, that’s how everyone saw me, even if they didn’t believe the counter-charges. I wasn’t somepony who helped. I was just an unhinged Thestral who was in the right place. And now, I can’t even escape all of that a thousand lengths underground.” He looked at his hooves, the Thestral’s ears pinned back. “I just wish I knew what I could do to make creatures believe me.”
“I believe you,” Sassi whispered. “Even if I doubted you for a moment. You’ve done nothing to deserve that. But you need to understand, unlike the creatures above ground, this time it isn’t you.”
He glanced up at her, but her form was a bit blurry from unshed tears.
“I grew up among some of the worst creatures this world can offer,” Sassi continued, her voice shaking slightly. “Many wouldn’t have a second thought about taking advantage of a mare in my current position, they certainly made enough jokes about it. For example, when we get back to the apartment, I’ll need your help getting this armor off and rinsing all this gore from my fur. The wound has to be bandaged and cleaned or I’ll be in real trouble from an infection.”
Her eyes looked away, the mare’s jaw clenching. “And the thought of that terrifies me, having you be that close. But logically, your case aside, you’ve done nothing to warrant that suspicion. Yet if it isn’t Flask, I wouldn’t trust anyone near me like that, male or female. And that’s just it.”
Her voice shifted, Sassi’s eyes drifting to the floor.
“I am so tired of always second-guessing creature’s words and intentions. There was always a hidden motive, a secret, unspoken want. My entire life I’ve had to be on my guard just to survive in this place. But I don’t want to think that way about you, Astral. You’re just going to have to give me time. I’ve been tired of it for a long, long while, but it’s tough to break from it when that’s your reality. I only got brief glimpses of life when that’s not the case.”
Nodding in understanding, Astral sat down next to Sassi, still not looking at her as he thought.
“I know, and I don’t want to do anything to make you think ill of me. Logically, you have more reason than most to not trust me, or anyone really.” He paused, ears flattening. “It just…any creature who knows about the case looks at me in either disgust or fear. It makes me wonder, as stupid as it is.”
“Wonder what?”
He let out a humorless huff at that.
“If the papers were right,” the bat-pony continued, “if the dozens of articles, constant posts on that oh so lovely digital platform, the jeers, they were all calling me something I knew I wasn’t. But after a while, it’s just my voice saying that I’m n-not a monster.”
Sassi didn’t say anything for a moment, the mare finally letting out a disproving snort.
“What a bunch of idiots,” she finally said, rolling her eyes as Astral looked over to her in surprise. “The only reason they’re calling you a monster is because they’ve never seen a real one. Like the ones we’re currently hiding from.” Sassi paused, letting out a wince. “Can you help me up? Just, lean me against the wall.”
Helping the mare settle into a more comfortable position, Astral shook the tears from his eyes as Sassi looked at him with a surprisingly intense gaze.
“Astral, I’ve grown up among monsters,” she said firmly, “some looked like Skitters. Others looked like ponies, gryphons, or other creatures. I’ve killed many types of them. You are not one.”
A thankful smile, however slight, slid onto Astral’s face.
“Thank you, Sassi,” he whispered.
“The creatures above ground are so blasted sheltered,” Sassi added, a bit of bitterness in her tone, “there hasn’t been a large war in what, decades? Centuries? More? Most creatures have no idea how good they have it, no idea that evil still exists. The only difference is now that instead of a Tirek or Sombra from history class rising up again, the bad creatures look exactly like everyone else. I’ve gotten pretty good at discerning them, for your information.”
“I certainly believe that,” he said, smile still starting to tug at his mouth.
“And you are not a bad pony,” Sassi said, gaze then settling to her hooves, “you’re a good stallion, a much better one than I…this place deserves.” Her voice paused briefly, as if abruptly changing her thoughts, eyes then looking over to him. “So, I hope you can forgive me for my doubts. I’m trying to work through them. But I can’t forget my past experiences just because a handsome stallion says something, or even saves my life apparently. I do trust you, but I just need time,” her ears then flattened, “or perhaps I also need to convince you that I do trust you.”
Astral’s face was still burning from the ‘handsome’ comment, but he held his tongue.
“I guess we both need time,” he managed to say, Sassi rolling her eyes.
“No, you just need to keep being an infuriatingly upbeat gentlecolt,” she replied, “and be a bit patient. I need time to work through growing up in a social cesspool and not trusting creatures.”
“I mean, ok?” he managed to say, head tilting to the side curiously. “And infuriating?”
She rolled her eyes again at that.
“Yes. Infuriating. Even in this lousy Silo, you are still kind and naturally upbeat. Those are things missing from this place.”
“And that’s infuriating? Not sure I understand.”
Sassi’s explanation didn’t come, the mare abruptly starting to shiver.
“P-ponyfeathers,” she hissed.
Taking another blood reading, Astral noted the percentage hadn’t dropped, so…
“Just a wave. Happens with high doses of venom. It makes parts of your body run haywire,” she explained, “I’m guessing the Spiders were bred to be more potent again since our last tests. So, I’m not dying yet. But these waves are awful if they’re anything like what we tested before.”
“Tested?!”
“Yeah, we got pricked with a bit of the venom in case we got bit. Nothing permanent, but just to know how to handle the symptoms. This is clearly worse. Waves will continue for a few days with high enough doses; not fatal with sufficient anti-venom, but lousy.”
As the mare continued to shiver, Astral looked through the medical kit for anything that could possibly help. He found nothing, unfortunately.
“I appreciate the thought, but this is a ‘ride it out’ sort of thing,” Sassi said softly.
“What can I do to help?” he asked, their eyes widening as a familiar *click…click…click* echoed outside the halls.
After a few minutes of long silence, Sassi whispered a single word which made Astral look at
her in surprise.
“Hoof.”
“Huh?”
Scooting over next to her, Astral’s eyes met Sassi’s. As her body shivered, the mare’s eyes were wide in genuine fear, a few tears brimming on the edges. It was clear that everything up to this point had been relayed from behind a casual wall of confidence, that everything would be alright.
In an abrupt shift, the stallion realized that he was seeing Sassi the pony, not the armored mare who had effortlessly torn apart the Skitters. He was seeing someone who could still get afraid, who could feel helpless.
“T-this is going to sound hypocritic-cal after our whole trust talk,” she managed to stammer. “But that’s what you can d-do to help.”
“…my hoof?”
“Just hold my hoof, Astral,” Sassi said, no sigh of exasperation, but an almost pleading tone as the mare continued to shiver. Her breaths abruptly became a bit more panicked, eyes darting around briefly as if struggling to focus on something.
Reaching down to firmly hold the mare’s hoof in his own, Astral noted how she immediately calmed down.
“T-temporary blindness. Venom is working its way all around my system,” she explained. “So, I can’t see you right now. I’m…I can’t really do much of anything.”
She sniffled, the crumbling walls of confidence hammering home to Astral how helpless the mare felt.
“As I s-said, I am not used to relying on others, even Flask,” Sassi whispered, “and w-well, I wanted more reasons to t-trust you, so here you go,” she added weakly, Astral squeezing her hoof with his own.
“We’ve known each other for two weeks, not even that,” he said firmly. “You can’t rush trusting someone. Stereotypes aside, I’d certainly balk if a mare was inviting me into a shower after that time, even if it’s common for some. But I’d say we’ve still got a pretty good track record, huh? You saved my life from freakish creatures, me repaying you with smoothies.”
Sassi let out a weak laugh.
“That’s fair, but they’re good smoothies. And you’ve done a lot more than that.”
“I…have?”
The mare closed her eyes, wincing as the shivers abated for a moment.
“Topic for another t-time. Going to close my eyes here, not like I can see anyways.”
They didn’t say much more for a time, Astral feeling fairly useless as he settled down next to Sassi, still holding her hoof. To see her so vulnerable was extremely disarming; it was like meeting a new pony, but not in a bad way. It made her seem more real and less of an indestructible soldier.
“Astral?” she asked, “can you just, tell me something.”
“What kind of something?”
“Anything. What is it like when you go camping? What do the trees look like? The sounds? Anything to make m-me forget what is going on right now,” she explained. Sassi’s sides shivered, Astral shocked to realize the mare was barely holding in sobs. “This is bringing back some really bad stuff, ok? P-please? I don’t want to think right now.”
“Well, some of the best forests, I think, can be in winter or the fall” Astral said immediately. He shoved his worry down, and there was a fair bit of it for the mare on multiple levels. It was clear there was still a lot he didn’t know about Sassi, layers, and layers that were surfacing in this situation. The genuine pleading in her voice made his heart ache in sympathy, even if he didn’t know what she had gone through. All he wanted to do was help.
So, he’d do the best he could.
“During the fall, in areas where the weather moves on its own, it has this weird sense of power when you walk under the trees,” the stallion continued, “everything moves on its own, a little world where you’re just visiting. The leaves falling, the clouds, even the weird wildlife. The best smell would be pine after rain…”
He continued to describe a simple walk through the woods, how camping went, the sights and sounds of it all.
Judging from the peaceful smile on Sassi’s face, Astral was doing a decent job.