//------------------------------// // This is the Thanks I Get... // Story: Flitterblocked // by SparklingTwilight //------------------------------// Flitter applied her makeup: moisturizer, foundation first, then concealer, powder, powder, more powder, and finally highlighter. "Good, good." I nodded even though I wouldn't mess around with that whole process. But I needed to support her. "Are you watching me again?" Flitter, my sister, looked over her shoulder with a scowl, asking a question to which the answer was obvious. I rolled my eyes: "No." "You look like you're watching me." I blinked. "Why?" She asked. "I wanted to make sure you were okay." She swallowed--hard. And twisted her head to consider me. Were tears coming? "C'mon little Princess; we'll be fine." My voice wavered, but the words were more important than the delivery. She brightened. "'k." And she smiled at me. "I'm 'k', why wouldn't I be 'k? We're 'k--heh-heh." Her laugh was too fake--even though she'd heard the magic words. I wasn't buying it. "You'll do fine as an intern." I added another message of support. She blinked, slowly. "I might have done better at school." That statement was beyond absurd. And there was no way I would have stayed at our former home any longer than I had to. And if I wasn't staying... "You know you shouldn't have stayed... alone." She was silent. "You're the bully." She poked at me with a mean, but lightly-struck hoof to my right shoulder. I didn't flinch, but I sighed. "Uggghh!" She groaned. "Fine!" She turned back to the mirror and buried her face in her hooves. When she looked up, her makeup was smeared. She shrieked a curse: "Hoarseapples! Hoarseapples! I don't have time to fix it." "Don't worry. We'll get there on time." "Hoarseapples!" She hyperventilated, flailing enraged wings and forelegs. "Breathe, Princess!" I grabbed her shoulders and stared her straight in the face. "Fine. Fine." I repeated calming words. "I'm here. I'm here." I took a sharp wingslap to the face, but I held my ground. With a shudder, she stopped flailing. Then she shivered in cold rage. I helped guide her hooves and steady them as she applied her vibrant colors--not my style preference, but I wanted her to feel comfortable and safe in this new place with me. "You the intern?" Rainbow Dash, chief of the Ponyville Weather Team asked my sister while we hovered for review. Flitter fluttered, and she blinked and looked over at me. I mouthed her name. "You the intern?" Rainbow Dash hovered directly in front of her, repeating her question. Flitter jerked and mouthed something too soft to hear--probably her name--but who could tell? "Got a fly in your throat?" Rainbow sneered. "Chief, ah--" I spoke up. "Was I speaking to you?" Rainbow sidled in front of me. "No, Chief." I shook my head. "Then wait your turn." Rainbow buzzed back in front of my sister. This had been a bad idea. We should have found non-traditional jobs. The government bureau had suggested some but they didn't pay much and were dead-end jobs. I was too proud. Even with my help, Flitter couldn't handle this alpha-mare-type work, giving it back to the other mares like a good ol'girl and it didn't matter where we were placed in this type of position: it would be too much for her. I couldn't hyperventilate in front of my new boss--but I really badly wanted to do it. Rainbow Dash was supposed to be a light touch--did most of the contrail-core work herself to garner laurels for a Wonderbolts position, so there was more time for her teammates to play around, and she found it funny to watch them. Flitter was an expert at playing, so I figured the boss would be more likely to overlook shortcomings. Besides, Flitter'd get better. She just needed time to perfect her field work and a reliable partner. As long as she could get past the boss' first inspection. ... It seemed increasingly likely that my (at the time drunken) advice-giver Cloud Kicker had been wrong about the situation. I shouldn't have trusted her. Flitter, bow affixed high in her hair and her elaborate makeup done to impress her new boss, bobbed dumbly in front of Rainbow. "Sky to your mind, Princess." Rainbow nicknamed my gussied-up sister and did a backflip. Flitter brightened on hearing the name, even though it probably wasn't intended as a compliment. And she blushed. "Oh, Rainbow," she simpered. Rainbow Dash arched an eyebrow. "It's Rainbow Dash." "Rainbow... Dash." She said it slow, sultry, and she batted her eyelashes. Rainbow Dash grimaced and looked away from Flitter's gaze. "Your name?" "Flitter." She smiled simply, simpering. "Second name?" "Chaser." "Flitter Chaser, right?" "Mmm-hmm." "Say 'yes ma'am.'" Rainbow spoke softly. Flitter, her eyes focusing somewhere in the sky above Rainbow's head, didn't say anything and I couldn't mouth anything more to her without Rainbow catching me. "I shouldn't have to repeat myself. Are we going to have a problem?" Rainbow's brow creased. "Your grades are... fine... enough in the field and in theory. But if you can't listen, can't perform--" "Are you mad?" Flitter blinked. I wanted to move to her side, but right now it would be worse if I tried to help. Flitter had to do this little thing on her own. "What?" Rainbow asked. "Are you mad at me? Sorry." Flitter hovered. I evaluated her, just barely, out the side of one of my eyes while I maintained my perfect stance. Her form was still okay, not as perfect as mine, but acceptable. "I'm not mad," Rainbow barked. "I just want a straight answer." Her voice suddenly softened. "You don't need to be so stressed, Princess." "Oh," brightening again at the magic words, my sister smiled. "An answer to what?" "I don't even remember!" Rainbow Dash threw her head back with a chuckle. Flitter joined in. "Fine. Whatever." Rainbow waved off any concerns. "I've got you on my list here." Rainbow Dash pulled out a paper from behind one of her wings, then marked a big black check mark beside Flitter's name. I shouldn't have been so worried about her passing this last step for employment. Flitter had a way of charming other ponies--when she could focus enough. Then it was my turn. "And you, Interrupting Mare?" Rainbow turned to me. I saluted. "Cloud Chaser reporting for duty, ma'am!" "Mmm-hmm." Rainbow Dash sized me up. "Didn't think I'd be getting a two-for when I accepted your application, but here we are." "Thank you ma'am!" I held myself as stiff as possible, my head evenly erect, not fluttering, unmoved by the wind. "You're fine with your salary being split?" "We'll make it work, ma'am." "No other way." Rainbow Dash shrugged. Then she lowered her voice to me and snuck a side-glance at Flitter. "Ponyville doesn't have the social services that Cloudsdale has, and they haven't had a lot of pegasi..." "Yes, ma'am. Understood, ma'am." My answers remained professional, by the book, like we learned in Weather class. The Chief needed to know that I could handle things for both of us. And the Chief dropped the idea, so she must have trusted that I had the situation well in hoof. "You can relax." Rainbow smiled a little. "We're friendly here in Ponyville." "Yes, ma'am." Rainbow arched an eyebrow. "You did want to be called that?" My voice wavered a bit. Rainbow had insisted that my sister call her that. And the book indicated it was a proper form of address... "It's fine." Rainbow Dash waved a foreleg. "But when we're not at work, call me Rainbow. Or Dash," she chuckled. "With some ponies I have to be more formal or else they'll take liberties. With you though, although you look a little wild..." she squinted at my unkempt, voluminous mane (I had run a comb through it a few times, but unlike what sis thought, talent's what matters and hair gets messy anyway when you're working). "I've heard about your reputation for caution, step by step, by the book--but I lead another way. Gotta be more flexible; adjust management strategies to the mare, meet her where she is and encourage her to grow in different ways." "Yes, ma'am." I nodded. "So, the main thing you need to know is--" "Is that--Is he--" Flitter was suddenly squawking and pointing in the air. Above us, I saw two ponies fly by, ponies who had been, respectively, one and two years ahead of me in school: Cloud Kicker, who'd tipped me off to the position during one of her drunken visits to the Cloudsdale Central Casino where I'd been working as a bouncer to better earn cash for *this*, and lovey Thunderlane, a strapping black stallion with extensive, exciting plumage. I was lying to myself. I hadn't just chosen a Ponyville posting because of Rainbow Dash's rumored elemental laxity. At least one other town had an opening that may have been just as lax but also safer. Ponyville bordered the malevolent Everfree Forest--murderer of many ponies. The Ponyville Weather Team had openings all the time--in part due to injuries, which is how Rainbow Dash, a rather young Weather Chief, had been promoted so swiftly. She had saved the previous chief from certain death at the paws of an airborne manticore--a manticore! Because of that, and weird weather patterns, Ponyville weather workers collected their extra hazard pay payouts, then soon moved on to calmer areas where monsters didn't lurk and the weather didn't fight so much. But even hazard pay that could comfortably support two frugal ponies hadn't been what made my decision. I was greedy. Flitter, our Princess, had gotten what she wanted all the time. She was dizzy, ditzy as long as she'd been talking, maybe because our drunken parents had dropped her... or hit her. What really happened: I dunno. I should have been watching her, then I'd know for sure. Parents made up for it, as much as anyone could. They probably adjusted too much. I think she was faking some of what she did. Parents thought so too. What did she get? She got sweets, spa treatments, private tutoring--everything I didn't have. Parents said there wasn't enough extra to go around for me, but whatever. I don't like sweets, spa treatments are for coddling weaklings, and private tutoring isn't necessary for a gifted natural flyer like myself. I don't even--hoarseapples! Back to the point. Anyway, parents also got mad at Flitter. Her pampering cost a lot. Cloudsdale Council made sure they spent a certain amount each year to catch her back up to where the government thought she'd be if she hadn't had the thing happen to her. Parents argued she was how she'd have been anyways--even hired some doctors as support. Were they right? Maybe so: I dunno. I do know that Flitter's a little slow and unfocused, although maybe not as much as that ditzy Derpy Hooves who I met a bit after we moved to Ponyville. Maybe, with my help, Flitter can someday fly on her own--figuratively--make her own life. If Derpy can do it while also raising a little one in her care then Flitter can too, right? I always got less at home but I learned to keep my mouth shut since when I opened it, my parents insisted I was mistaken, and then they redistributed more as punishment. Jokes on them though because I didn't even like that lipstick and those bows. Bunch of hoarseapples... Still, I wanted to help Flitter too. Pegasi look out for siblings. The tribal epics agree. Maybe that's why I need to care--I dunno. She was afraid of our parents--cheery when they treated her as a Princess--chilled when she was--in whispered words--a designated 'burden'. And at school, when she was spacing out in her inner world--other students were cruel, probably because they were jealous. Teachers gave her more time to complete exams--she still didn't do great. She had her tutors, and I also helped with some homework. And she passed. She did. But when I came back from the camp I went to without her--I'd found her balled up locked in her room covered in tears and I still don't know what happened. I was about to fly into the independent world of work but I couldn't leave her alone. But the rationale for Ponyville, which presented more physical dangers than other locations, was primarily because that hunk Thunderlane was there. "You still have a crush on him?" I sharply asked Flitter. "Uh-huh." She nodded. "Why?" "What do you mean?" "Why do you have a crush?" "Mmmm." She kicked a hoof against a cloud. A little puff wafted up. "Don't you like--" I named a few ponies who I knew she had crushes on. "Mmmm," she nodded. "So you don't have any reason to fixate on him," I declared. "You remember what the doctor said about the unhealthiness of limerent fixation." "Mmmm," she nodded again. I sighed. "He and I were dating." "But then you weren't." She cocked her head and jutted out her jaw. "And you aren't." "We might be." "Nah." She shook her head, quick, side to side. "He was kissing Cloud Kicker." "I didn't see that--" "Not today." "When did you see-" "Heh-heh." "Flitter!" One of her fantastical lies--hopefully. "Catch me, Sis." She danced from cloud to cloud. "You're so full of hoarseapples!" I shouted. "That'll make it easier to catch me!" She giggled, and spun a cloud at my face. She disappeared. I buzzed after her. That was one good thing about her love of play, it had helped her develop a working sense of how to manipulate weather--which, along with the special Cloudsdale governmental favor, is how she sneaked into the unpaid position. We did... good. Our first week's evaluation from Rainbow Dash was fine. "Yay! Pancakes and hugs for all!" Flitter got to cooking: another thing she was good at as long as the food wasn't fish--that made her nauseous--another point of contention with our parents, pegasi society, and my yearning stomach. I loved fish! But I didn't want to put her in the hospital--even with the hazard pay, on one salary we couldn't afford an extended stay if she had one of her reactions and, more important, I didn't want her to suffer. Her blueberry pancakes were delicious. But she'd picked those particular cursed berries from the Celestia-forsaken Everfree Forest. So we both were sick, mouths phlegmed-up and swollen into literal hoarseapples for a start. But someone had to take care of her. I did it. "Princess, here's some warm water." I hoofed over to her a compress. She smiled up at me, wanly and allowed me to deposit it on her forehead. "Princess, if you start to feel worse than you do now, we'll go to the hospital." I assured her. These blueberries had done a number on our digestive tracts. "It's all right. You said they wouldn't know how to treat pegasi." I wasn't sure about that, but it was probably true. Ponyville was an Earth pony town, primarily. And pegasi digestive tracts differ a bit from earth ponies'. I wish I had brought my Biology textbook instead of selling it. Even though those extra bits had helped, it had been a shortsighted decision. I went to vomit again. After, I splashed water from the sink, looked at its overhanging mirror, cleaned myself, took a deep breath, saw the reflection of my disheveled mane--that wasn't something I needed to address. I girded myself, returned to our kitchen, and brewed Flitter an herbal tea. Together, we got through the sickness. "Welcome back, newbs." Rainbow Dash zipped up and greeted us when the rest of the Team were just dots in the distance. "A week on and then a couple days off. Let's try not to repeat that," she noted and then pivoted her point. "You've been running over the routines in your heads, right? Learned something so you can meld with our methods?" "I've learned not to harvest berries from the Everfree Forest," Flitter beamed. Rainbow Dash blinked, putting together the logic of Flitter's point. "Yeah," she nodded. "You wanna know what's safe to eat, ask a local like Fluttershy." "Who?" I asked. "Fluttershy," Rainbow Dash said, explaining nothing. "Pardon, ma'am?" I repeated. "She's a pegasus who lives in a cottage over thattaway." Rainbow pointed with a wing. "Understood, ma'am." "It's on the ground," Rainbow added. "The ground, ma'am?" I asked, unsure if I'd heard right. "Yes." "A pegasus on the ground?" "Got a problem with that?" Rainbow reared up, spreading her wings in sudden challenge. "No, ma'am." I shook my head although the situation was a bit strange. Pegasi in Canterlot and Manehatten--big cities--could live on the ground and sometimes did out of convenience, but ground living wasn't supposed to be as comfortable as a cloud dwelling. Cloud dwellers literally looked down on land dwellers: sometimes we shaded them. I wouldn't feel comfortable knowing someone's dwelling was right above my head at night, even though dwellings didn't usually fall. But... landlife might be cheaper. This earth pony town might have unoccupied ground dwellings with good rates. Our small cloudobe dwelling's rent consumed most of our check... anything that could drive that cost down was something to think about. I still had a bit of an upset stomach, but Flitter at least had recovered well. Maybe too well. She was making eyes at Thunderlane who was zipping along above us, racing last-minute to the morning meeting as appeared to be usual for him. "Flitter, watch out!" A cumulonimbus was floating toward her and her back was to it. It could strike her with a lightning bolt that would drop her to the ground! No! I raced over to it and got to work, wrangling. After the cloud was safely squashed and squeezed, I was sweating and Flitter finally looked over to see what I was doing. But instead of being grateful, she looked beyond. "Why are you over here?" "A cumulonimbus snuck up on you--" I started. "But what about your cloud?" She pointed a foreleg at where I should have been. My cloud was about to break open and rain upon an outdoor bistro. I got a demerit, and a head shake from Rainbow Dash. Nopony noticed my cumulonimbus wrangling. Flitter got a commendation. All of her work had been done precisely. At least there wasn't an overwhelming amount of work for us, even though our labor was more difficult than it would probably have been in other districts. Rainbow Dash handled 60% of the tasks, completing them about 20% faster and better than any other pony probably would have. Cloud Kicker and Thunderlane took care of the last 20%, though Thunderlane was by far the more competent of those two. Life was different here. Less competitive. Flitter smiled. She didn't shirk. As a reward, I chaperoned her to Sugar Cube Corner, a confectionery in the earth pony village and she ate so much of the cold stuff so fast that her head fell flat on a table but they didn't laugh at her--none of the patrons. A pink poofy-haired pony jumped to her side with a warm compress and dabbed at her and brought her blinking back to reality. I should have expected Flitter fainting even though she wasn't in Cloudsdale--don't know why I thought it might have been different even though she'd pleaded. But the reaction here hadn't been so bad.... Maybe because we were still outsiders and Ponyvillians treated visitors kinder than locals? I dunno. That pink poofy-haired pony threw us a welcoming party. She rambled apologies about not locating us sooner and that she'd never thought to look up for part of Ponyville's jurisdiction. She promised (to herself) to adjust her range, whatever that meant: it's not like she could fly. I don't understand earth ponies. The party was fine, even though Thunderlane didn't come. Flitter loved it. I dunno whether the ponies she met are a good herd or not, but they didn't treat her badly. No namecalling like "fluffhead", "slowpoke", "off-center", or even loaded nicknames like the Chief's one for her--I needed to talk to Rainbow about that before she tainted Flitter's special title with criticism circulated at work. Most party participants were earth ponies: Berry Cherry, Punching Berry, whatever their names were--I probably mangled them. But we finally met that timid Fluttershy the Chief had mentioned. I pigeon-holed her about land-life. Learned some interesting things, and some useless things. I guess if we ever want a land-based pet then life on the ground would be safer. But why would we want a groundwalking pet? What benefit could one offer? It'd hold us back. We would always have to be watching it, making sure it didn't fall and crack itself.... Like, what sort of properly proud pegasus would adopt something like a turtle, y'know? We have to be free! I dunno. It was good to see Flitter enjoying herself. During and immediately after work I got a few chances to flirt with Thunderlane, though. He wasn't dating Cloud Kicker. My sister had invented that tale: of course. Apparently, though, he had dated her. Shivers strike whenever I think about that. Sure Cloud Kicker is sort of a friend, but that arguably makes it even a bigger eeww to think about. I didn't flirt with him. I stayed paired with Flitter. I had to--for her sake. Cloud Kicker was unstable and if anypony was going to pair with Thunderlane, it'd be me. Rainbow was fine with our arrangement, so we didn't rotate teams. Even when contractors like Derpy came in for one-off mobilizations, I still paired with Flitter. Cloud Kicker and Thunderlane weren't an item--according to Cloud Kicker, but they were a close-working team. When I could spare a glance I saw them laugh a lot. But I didn't see much since I kept most of my focus on Flitter, helping her get good evaluations--even better than mine. She laughed a lot at Rainbow Dash and batted her eyes and received favoritism: clearly. But at least favoritism here had less negative consequences than it had during school--the others didn't complain. Rainbow even changed her nickname. She had understood almost immediately when I made the request! No more "Princess" at work! Rainbow was a good worker, but outside of the nickname shifting--she was a terrible manager. When she wasn't clearing the skies, she was sleeping. Then, for the minimum amount of time, she supervised. She based her evaluations on our work's outcome without seeing how it was done! How could anyone know how good somepony was doing unless their process was studied? They needed to watch step by step like how I helped Flitter. If Rainbow had been carefully observing like that, then she would have been able to see the enormous added value I provided by carefully monitoring Flitter! I got another demerit today. Five, actually. I was watching Flitter wave at Thunderlane and I jumped in shock and accidentally snapped a lightning bolt that hit some Rich pony.(Author's Note: It struck your least-favorite member of the "Rich" family.) "Hover less." Rainbow Dash ordered me, casting a side glance at Flitter, who was playing "pop-up surprise" buried among some clouds with Thunderlane. "Focus more." I tried to flirt with Thunderlane but it all came out like hoarseapples and he finally said, "Thanks for the overture. I thought you were mad." For three weeks we barely talked and that was because I didn't approach him first: that was his excuse? "Not mad, I'm... bad." He frowned: "What?" "Um..." Flummoxed, I looked over to see if a work emergency would provide me an out. Flitter was easily wrangling a stratus. I had to answer or flee away. I answered. "Bad for not talking to you sooner. I was smiling at you though." "Didn't know if it was an 'I'm-trying-to-seem-polite' smile or something else." His hunky voice boomed. Of course it was something else! But I didn't say that. "Mmm..." I mumbled! Flitter's mumbling was genetic! Or contagious! Flitter fluttered up. "Hi Thunderlane." She said. "Hello yourself," he smiled. "How's your baking been going?" She flushed and looked at him, slightly to the right of his face so she was looking at his flank instead of his expression. "Scrumptious!" she said. "Want pancakes again tomorrow?" "Again?" I asked, aghast. "Mmm-hmm." Flitter nodded, bow in her mane bobbing obnoxiously. "Thanks!" Thunderlane shot a nervous glance towards me and my crazed expression, then he lifted off. "When were you feeding him!" I demanded. "I brought extra snacks yesterday," Flutter explained. "You were away relieving yourself when I fed them to him." "You fed them to him." A stupid repetition, but what she said was ridiculous. I hadn't even seen them together much! "Mmm-hmmm," Flitter nodded enthusiastically. "You know I like him." "We're not dating," Flitter laughed, a bit too loud. "You fed him." I stressed the word 'fed'. "He's a hungry strapping stallion who needed some rest." "You don't know anything about relationships." A low blow accusation, but it was true. "I wasn't free to date..." she sighed. "There was that one--" "What?" Another fantasy? "Are you not gonna let me date too?" She pouted. "You need to be... safe," I said. "They didn't want you to go with somepony we couldn't trust." "You dated Thunderlane. Isn't he trusty?" She looked at me with wide, pleading eyes. Maybe he was trustworthy. He was very hoovesey but he hadn't been too pushy. But that was when he was living with his family. Now he crashed in a bachelor's cloud. The situation could have changed. But there was an easier objection to Flitter's logic. "I mean, he's more into me than anypony else. He's just not that into you." "Really?" "You know you don't always read ponies' expressions... intentions the usual way." It was a low-blow but it had to be noted. "No pony does that right all the time," she frowned. She wasn't wrong. I swallowed. Hard. "This sharing lunch with Thunderlane thing: it wasn't one of your fantasies?" "Nope." Flitter shook her head. "I've been having less. I'm happy here." She was. There wasn't any more yelling at home except when it came from her, directed at me. And Ponyville's Weather Team, despite all of Rainbow Dash's lax leadership, was friendly. At least, unlike school, it wasn't hostile. Cloud Kicker and Thunderlane knew not to harass Flitter--or I'd tear them apart. And Rainbow Dash was supportive with some words that could be smoothed over and most ones that weren't kind were missed by Flitter. But Flitter romancing my Thunderlane, my old beau, my beloved who I dated before he graduated and before long distance and work kept us apart--that possibility was going to merely remain one of Flitter's flights of fantasy. Flitter and Thunderlane were flying together, ahead of me. He snapped up her syrupy pancake. I closed my eyes. They kissed: loudly. Had I opened my eyes again to see that? Yes, I had. Flitter and Thunderlane... on her own initiative, her own merits. Laughing together. This shouldn't be real. But of course, it actually happened--hoarseapples! Postscript Forgive my sister. Things will work out. I can't lock her in her room. She did this. She actually like, won Thunderlane's heart, and I guess that writing it out like this I sort of see how--at least I see how I didn't win back his. I should probably burn this journal in case my sis gets her hooves on it. It's been difficult. Kinda understand the parents--a bit. Schizophrenic herky-jerkey feelings. Don't want to do that though. Maybe I should hover less. Focus more. Hoarseapples! Maybe. Maybe not. I dunno. But I'll keep taking care of her. Maybe just differently? Chaperone their dates. Heh. Hmm... - From the Grievance Journal of Cloud Chaser. Afterward "Cloud?" A soft voice lingered at the door to our room. "What?" My voice cracked. I wiped away tears. "I wanted to make sure you're okay." Flitter said in her sotto voce tones. "I'm not." "Um." "Ugh," I sighed. "Come in. I'm fine." "'k." She opened the door. She had a nervous grin on her face and had strategically re-positioned her bow in an unexpected location, possibly to cover her neck. Thunderlane had liked nipping... "Um," Flitter alighted on her ultra-soft bed across from me. The cloud bounced her until she settled. I looked away from her. "Um..." Not much to add. Eloquent insight wasn't common with her. We sat in silence for quite a while: two emotionless statues situated in confrontational poses. Flitter sat... and snored. There she was, my "Princess" Flitter. I had helped her so much. She repaid that with this hoarseapples. Then I lay down in my bed. I didn't want to hate her. So, I wouldn't. I had that choice, just like everypony in Cloudsdale had Too many. Too much trouble. Probably an unfair generalization of those flyhards but whatever. Ponyville, was new. It wasn't there. Things were, would be different here. For her. For now? For ever? I wept, just a drip, flared out my wings, shook, tucked them in again, then I slept.