Twilight Gets a Puppy
Season 5
by TDR
"Make New Fireballs, but Keep Discord"
[ Ponyville, two weeks after Tempest came to town. Sea Pony embassy]
“I must thank you again for allowing us to tap into your ley line network Mayor, it will be quite helpful to maintain the current in the building. Some of the plants we have brought in do not do well in still waters.” Aqua stated.
“You are welcome Empress Aqua, but I would like to point out that I was fully against a ley line network and it was only since Seshat grew here that we have one at all.” The Mayor offered.” Not that Miss Sparkle has told me ANYTHING about extending it as she did nor any of the other things she has done to it!”
“You were fine with it when I managed to use it to protect down town.”Twilight huffed.” That network is still there, but since I don't live in Golden Oaks any more refreshing it is more of a bother. Seshet was born with a network already in her root structure and since that is now spread across town and all the way out to Sweet Apple Acres, I've just been utilizing the protection spells through that and thus keeping property values up.”
Twilight paused a moment.
“You're welcome.” Twilight concluded.
“It is not what little value you are giving , nor the additional protection, though I will admit the fire suppression spells are quite useful for when Sweetiebelle has a home ec class. “The Mayor grumbled.” I am more worried about what you are going to do with said network than anything else. Your tree has a much bigger no fly zone than the library did.”
“ As I have told you before Mayor, a mana network is completely safe, most major towns have a mana network, Canterlot, Manehatten, Bayston....” Twilight continued.
“So did Neighgasaki...” The Mayor grumbled
“Yes one city out of hundred that was destroyed at the beginning of the creation of the mana network.” Twilight grumbled.”Think about all you can do with that energy, the whole town can be put on the grid and we wouldn't need to use the hydroelectric dam as much for the power supply. You know how bad that things age is showing. We can shut it down to finally make all the necessary repairs or forgo them entirely and hook everyone up to the Ley Lines. That would bring a boost in sales as ponies move to switch to the new equipment to tap into the network.”
“I still do not like it.” The Mayor offered.
“Seriously? I am the goddess of magic, the network is being run by a demigod, and I can make everything safer than it's ever been before with this network, all the spells that can be run through it will help keep everyone secure.”
“It is exactly that you are the goddess of magic that I do not like this. You've been in town for five years Twilight. “The Mayor pointed out. “I've seen what you've done these last five years and I am absolutely terrified that you now have a way to do some of that to the whole town.”
“I never did anything...”
“I've seen the fields after you participated in the sister hooves social, I've seen the basement of the Golden Oaks” The Mayor ranted. “And i was actually present when you managed to make something blow up with enough force to blow the entire library out of the ground, spin it in the air and drop it so the main door of it faces away from the road now and towards the park. You managed to get a tree out of the ground in it's entirety and spin it!!”
“That was not what was planned at the time.” Twilight muttered.
“Twilight, you have blow up half a block with a crank pencil sharpener and a orange.”The Mayor grumbled.” I am terrified of what you will do with a mana network.”
“Is it too late to relocate the embassy in Canterlot?” Aqua questioned looking warily at Twilight.
“Look my work on the ley line has been checked and double checked by experts in the field. “Twilight rolled her eyes.” Nothing ca OOOF!!”
Twilight was cut off as Aqua lashed her tail suddenly smacking the purple mare in the mouth knocking her on her rump.
That was the better result as the mayor had ripped out a massive chunk of the road and was about to bludgeon the purple mare with it to stop the words being uttered.
“You know better than that Princess Sparkle!”the Mayor snapped
“Awww come on she almost said it.” a voice from a tree nearby whined.
“Murphy....”Aqua sighed as a large star Spider the size of a ponies head descended on a silk line from the tree canopy.
“What?” Murphy asked innocently.
“Why are you here?” Aqua questioned.
“Are you kidding? The Everfree's been a nest of mine since ponies abandoned the castle in there.” Murphy huffed. “ I mean where did you think I went when not at meetings?”
“To be fair I thought you simply appeared when you were invoked.” Aqua frowned.
“That too” Murphy agreed.
“Murphy my children are here, you need to leave this town alone and not bother it with your manipulations.” Aqua ordered.
“How about no.” Murphy stated. “I was here first Aqua and the Everfree is a perfect spot for my kids. Sure a lot of them get eaten, but that's why there's thousands per egg sack. Now if only they were a bit smarter.”
“Murphy.......” Aqua growled.
“Excuse me,.... you say you live in the Everfree and have since Princess Celestia moved the capitol out of it?” Mayor asked
“Yep at least a thousand years. To much screwing with the weave in those woods and I just opted to stay after I fixed it. Seemed to have caused some issues with local towns on certain days but ehh.”Murphy gave the spider equivalent of a shrug. ”Pony problems.”
“The forest belongs to Princess Celestia, did you ask her if you could live there ?” Aqua demanded.
“It's a wild place, it technically belongs to Martle and he was cool with it.”Murphy pointed out.
“The forest was actually granted to Ponyville not long after the Apples settled here about ninety or so years ago. “The Mayor pointed out.” So technically the whole thing belongs to Ponyville.”
“Oookay.” Murphy stated.” So?”
“As by Ponyville tax code you and your family owe at least ninety years worth of back taxes, adjusted for inflation... Twilight what's the spawn rate for Star Spiders?”
“Errrr every other spring if I recall correctly with an average brood size of 800 per egg sack.” Twilight stated, calculating.” Going by breeding rates...”
“Hold on now, Star Spiders count as wild animals.”Murphy stated, “And I'm a god..”
“Being a god is irrelevant to the Equestrian tax code, and according to the regulations any direct spawn of a god counts as a demi god as those are considered sapient enough to be taxed as well.”The Mayor stated.” Twilight would you ask Big Mac to crunch the numbers for me in terms of how many may still be alive and since Demi gods are immortal we can write off the star spiders normal life cycle and add those numbers.”
“Errr I'll ask.” Twilight blinked.” He might like the challenge given Canterlot switched to those E-Z tax forms last year.”
The group looked back at the tree to see that Murphy was gone.
“WE'LL SEND YOU THE BILL ONCE IT'S TALLIED.”The Mayor yelled after the fleeing spider god.
“You are scary.” Aqua nodded with a bit of respect.
“I love the smell of bureaucracy in the morning.' The Mayor grinned.” Smells like victory.”
[ Ponyville, Seshat]
“Spike. Where's Rahs?” Tempest asked curiously as she trotted into the castles kitchen.
“Huh? Why?” Spike asked looking up from one of the gaming books he was reading.
“I would like to know where he is in relation to me at all times.... for reasons.”Tempest stated with a steel that tried to hide her nervousness.
“Heh, guess his threats did a number on you huh?” Spike smirked. “I wouldn't stress over them too much. He's threatened a lot of creatures and all of them are still around.”
“Really? So he was just talking shit?” Tempest frowned.
“Oh no, I mean he did turn Discord into a chew toy, one of those really mauled ones that you see after a dogs gotten bored with it and torn out the squeaker, and he ripped out the throat of a witch wolf, though I don't think he threatened him first, so he doesn't count. Then there was Tirek, I mean I'm sure you've seen the pictures of our back yard before it was cleaned up. I'm also pretty sure no one died at PETA, and the guy he mauled as a pup could probably have walked again, eventually, prosthetic have come a long way..... Yeah okay maybe you should worry about him.”Spike considered. “Ehh still I wouldn't worry about it. Twilight wants to keep you around, so he won't do anything.”
“Right... sooo where is he?” Tempest asked working on hiding her nervousness again.
“In the Oneiroi, seems his sister had her pups. Two of them at that, boy and a girl. Rahs is freaking out over being an uncle and he's already in trouble for foal napping the town vet and a couple of doctors in Canterlot who treated him to make sure his sister and the pups are alright.”Spike explained.” Speaking of trouble, Where's Grubber?”
“He got a job.” Tempest stated
“Really? Who would hire him” Spike considered.
“Those two mares who own the spa. They found out he has a steady claw and a good bit of skill with make up.”Tempest explained.
“Makeup?”
“Yes.”
“I didn't expect that to be one of his skills.” Spike considered.
“Really?” Tempest asked raising one immaculately done eyebrows.
“Nope, but any way, don't worry too much about Rahs, unless you turn heel again , he won't do anything.”Spike waved a claw.
“Well that's good to know.”Tempest let out a held breath. ”Though given your brothers I'm surprised you haven't thrown out a threat or anything yet.”
“Well I could threaten to get you into Battle Mallet, you'd never have enough money to do anything after that.”Spike considered.
“Battle what?”
“Never mind, any way you don't have to worry about me in all that. If I decide to do something, you'll be awake, you'll be facing me and you'll be armed.”Spike explained.”You'll also have already lost ten steps before that point.”
Tempest blinked as the dragon went back to reading his magazine.
Despite never having developed a taste for yeti vodka, Tempest felt she really needed a drink that would kill some brain cells right now.
[Ponyville]
Sunset tilted her head looking up at the burning building. A swam of Ponyville fire fighters ran around the building, the unicorns stopping the fire from spreading to other houses with basic pyromancy, the pegasi brought the water, while the earth ponies on the team created fire breaks and made sure everyone was out of the house.
Not that there was any one in the building, the old structure was a storage area for the now closed Barnyard Bargains. The former manager had bought the main property to open a new store there, but he hadn't offered enough to purchase all of the property and some of the outbuildings like this one were still owned by Ponyville real estate.
The fire should have been put out within minutes of it being noticed, the Ponyville Fire Department was the literal best in Equestria at what they did, so much so that their ranks were often bolstered with rookies from other department who were there to train with the near weekly disasters the town had.
Sunset had happened to be nearby on market stall duty with Big Mac when the fire started and she had wandered over to see what was going on.
The fire had been doing it's best to ignore the actions of the fire fighters.
Fluttershy had been there as well and she was fretting, which was normal, though this time it seemed one of the animals she had been tending was in the building. Fluttershy had claimed he had been upset when she told him that he was nearly ready to be released back into the wild and he had run off to sulk and wound up here.
So not wanting to have to return to a retail job, something Big Mac was probably happy about given she scared customers more than his towering half draconic form, Sunset trotted into the fire to find whatever critter Fluttershy had lost.
Sunset adjusted her shield over her in case anything fell and formed an air bubble over her head . Just because the fire meant nothing didn't mean the lack of air and falling wreckage wouldn't be an issue. Sure she could have altered herself so she wouldn't need to breath, but that would take a few minutes with her blood magic, sometimes normal magic was easier.
There was a tense few moments from the firefighters after Sunset went into the building.
It only grew worse when there was a scream from inside, though before any one could react they heard sunset again.
“HOLY SHIT, YOU'RE ADORABLE!” Sunset squeed.
Looking around in confusion, the firefighters noticed their efforts were suddenly bearing fruit and redoubled them to get the blaze under control.
A happily burning Sunset Shimmer pranced out the front door holding something in one hoof.
“Ooh look at his itty eyes and the feets. “ The mare smirked as she moved up to Fluttershy.
“Ohm, thank goodness he's alright.” Fluttershy let out a breath.
Sunset continued to burn, and one of the rookie firefighters moved over to see what she was talking about.
Looking past Fluttershy to the flame crackling form of Sunset, he took note of a confused looking small lizard that sat on her hoof. It looked like a gecko save the bright red coloration, and the fact it was on fire as well.
“BY THE STARS, THAT'S A SALAMANDER!!” The fire fighter shrieked back peddling away from the pair.
The others in the area stopped for a moment turning to stare at the two mares who were looking at the Lizard, most of them glaring at Fluttershy who was wearing what amounted to a blacksmiths apron and heat shielded mask, both of which she had put on the moment Sunset came out..
“Alright. Who had bits on Fluttershy bringing a Salamander into town?” One of them asked.
“Dammit I bet on a a firefly.” one groaned
“I had a phoenix chick, but I knew that was a long shot with Peewee still being around.” another called
“I had money on a torkoal.” a pegasus muttered” I think that rookie Knight-King had a salamander.”
“How does that blond idiot keep winning these bets.” Another bemoaned.
“I think I will call you Ray, as you Ray-diate fire.”Sunset grinned.
Ray licked his eyeball.
“Sooo cute!!” Sunset squeed.
“Alright. Check. One two three.” Aria muttered tapping the mic a little, the sound echoing around the stage.
“Woof.” Rahs offered from the auditorium.
“He says the bass is a bit off.” Sonata called to the stage, no one had bothered to ask how she understood Rahs.
“Yeah, I can hear it, easy fix though. Still that's three of five of the lapel mics working, I'm surprised you found these so cheap and still functioning.” Aria hummed. “Even with the Empire back this crystal tech stuff ain't cheap. I figured you'd just go with the boom mics.”
“Arf.” Rahs offered.
“He says that the first play he has planned is mostly a musical and some of the singers need to stand out over the background singers more clearly.” Seshat translated.
“Makes sense.” Aria considered. “Might want to put these things through all the paces then.”
“Zeppelin?”Sonata asked getting a confused look from Rahs.
“Yep.” Aria stated taking a deep breath.
Rahs blinked his ears perking as music started playing from an unidentifiable source. He frowned at that. The source was clearly Aria humming, though to come with something this complex and loud, there were drums and a guitar with what sounded like a bass-line as well, the music was repetitive only a few notes that had a sound like a rising and falling pitch. The sound system was picking it up as well though it hardly seemed a test. Rahs glanced over to Sonata and noticed she was wearing a very large pair of earmuffs over her ears.
Rahs had been around Pinkie Pie long enough that he very quickly slapped his hands over his own ears.
“AhhhhhAHHHHHHHHHHHH AAAAAHHH!!!” Aria screamed out, the entire tree vibrating from the sound.
Sunset perked her ears as she looked out off the porch of the Apple family house, the scream had brought both her and Granny to the porch as the two had been discussing where Ray could live on the farm. She could see Applejack in the field looking around as the second of the screams hit.
Sunset smirked a little at the tone before offering a few lyrics.
“We come from the land of the ice and snow
From the midnight sun where the hot springs flow.”
“What?” Granny demanded.
“Hammer of the gods.” Sunset offered back.
“What is that some sorta new toy ah Celly's?” Granny questioned.
[Crystal Empire]
There was a worrying crunch and the crinkle of falling crystal broken from the impact sounded out from a two story house about a block from the palace.
Starlight Glimmer winced as she flailed in the magic holding her upside down against the interior wall. The mare holding her was a nerdy looking unicorn with thick glasses, an over sized sweater with her mulberry mane pulled up atop of her head in a lopsided mess. Streaks of purple ran through her mane and tail as well, and the cream colored fur that covered her looked stained in places. Her cutie mark was of three stars with a crescent moon in the center. Her lavender eyes had bags under them, that had bags under them, that had travel bags of their own.
Behind her, trying to calm the mare down was a orange unicorn stallion with white patches of fur on his legs and nose, he also didn't look like he had slept much.
“Listen here you attempted home wrecking little shit.” Moon Dancer snarled, turning Starlight to see her eye to eye, though the purple mare was fully upside down and pinned to the wall right now.
“ I don't care who you are, you do not come here and try to drag off my husband.”
“Dear.” Sunburst sighed.
“Don't dear me, Sunburst. If she had showed up and been friendly or at least polite I wouldn't be bothered, but she burst in here like she owned the place pushed me aside and started ranting to you about fucking KITES!” Moon Dancer snarled.
Starlight winced her horn glowing, she wasn't going to take this.
Moon Dancer didn't even look away from Sunburst as she brought a hoof up and slapped the base of Starlight's horn,hard, skewing her building magic and making the upside down mare go all cross eyed.
Moon Dancer turned away from her husband who simply sighed.
“Listen here mare. My name is Moon Dancer, not 'hey you', or 'get out of the way'.I'm the head researcher and expert on the Crystal Empire, Princess Luna's modern age teacher, I've got eight doctorates, three PHDs, have denied and over powered GODS, and am the mother of a very very curious foal who asks 'why' more times a day than citizens of Vanhoover speak at all, a foal who has gotten to the stage in his life where he does not sleep alone, and he does not sleep still, and is currently in his 'lets see how far I can push my parents to drink' phase of life. I am running on less sleep this week than a mayfly gets , which is to say, NONE, and I am currently weighing the options to see if preforming a horrific grisly murder so I can be thrown in jail is a decent enough option so I can get some sleep or not.”
Starlight was shaken in the air and bounced against the wall a few more times.
“DO NOT TEST ME, or I will destroy you to the point that the god of time will have to go back to when you were born to find any trace of you, ARE WE CLEAR?” Moon Dancer snarled, more than a hint of madness in the mares eyes showed Starlight that she was quite under prepared to deal with an irate mother of a three year old.
“Umm yes.” Starlight managed.
“Good. BYE.” Moon Dancer stated her horn glowing.
“Perhaps we can talk another time Starlight. Maybe in a few months when my son starts sleeping in his own bed again.” Sunburst sighed.
[ Three miles outside of the Crystal Empire]
A large plume off white powder and Tuesdayist fliers shot into the air as the teleported mare crashed into the snow bank.
Starlight gasped pushing herself out of the snow mound blinking as she glanced around at the pile of pamphlets, display cooking knives, and broken vacuum cleaners lay around her.
That mare clearly did not like solicitors.
Starlight sighed, well this would not do. She might have found Sunburst, but once again his cutie mark was the problem. He had met that nightmare made pony flesh at the school he had run off to.
Something else she needed to fix.
She was his oldest friend and he said talk another time, brushing her off like that.
Starlight paused frowning.
Another time huh?
Reaching into her saddle bags she pulled out the scroll she had found in the mines surrounded by all those monsters. She didn't know who this Minutte was who had signed it, but the spell on the scroll allowed the wielder to go back in time.
She had been hesitant when she found it, but all the other options she had tried to fix her problem had failed.
Well then. Lets see little miss alicorn and her little dog stop her from making sure they didn't exist at all.
[ Everywhen]
A white rabbit smiled.